inappropriateness
i have just caught sight of myself in the mirror. i was quite pleased with my new grey suit. now i realise that by pairing it with black tights and a white shirt, i look as if i'm wearing my school uniform, albeit with many more wrinkles and grey hair. i have also headed out for lunch with clients, only to realise i am dressed exactly like the waitresses. when was the last time you were inappropriately dressed?

alt: which do you look better in, mirrors or photographs? which are more accurate?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:13, 146 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Mirrors.
Photographs make my pull my awkward face.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:15, Reply)

My fake smile starts off unconvincing and gets even more so over the 30 seconds or so that it always seems to take for the bloody picture to be taken.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

You have a great face for radio.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:15, Reply)

A plasterer's

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:17, Reply)

i have a great face for kicking your arse at the LOLBASH

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

Pfft.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:31, Reply)

yeah
that's all you'll be able to say. i'm really really violent.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:37, Reply)

violent fat.

Please don't sit on me.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

Metallica's less succezzzzzzz..................

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:50, Reply)

*DELETES ACCOUNT*
*KILLS SELF*

no beer for you!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:00, Reply)

Hi ya swipes
My black suit and tie at funeral was apparently OTT last week?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:16, Reply)

Are you trying to lure out the noncey sweaty-handers?
Alt: I always look shit in photographs. I suspect that the camera does not lie.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:17, Reply)

That’s a bit negative
Sorry couldn’t resist that one
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:18, Reply)

haha. "lure"

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:20, Reply)

ha, no
we're talking about a very boring grey pencil skirt and white blouse, not a ra-ra cheerleader skirt and britney spears knotted just beneath the tits number.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

You've got Britney Spears tied just below your tits?
Skills, woman.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

i said "NOT"
blimey, i hope your scientific readings are more accurate...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

Hell no.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

TITS

( broadsword, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

You've seen photos of me. You've taken photos of me. Mirrors. No question.
I suspect the photos are more accurate.

I'm inappropriately dressed every day at work, nobody but my boss seems to give a shit and I ignore him. I'm very rarely inappropriately dressed when it matters. I scrub up pretty well, you know.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:17, Reply)

Legs and arse no doubt?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:19, Reply)

Too polite to say, old bean.

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:21, Reply)

Neither
I'm actually very unpleasant to look at
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:19, Reply)

I'm never inappropriately dressed.

alt: No idea. Reality is more accurate than either, though.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:20, Reply)

Oh, I did find a copy of the photo of me naked in that magazine in 1995.
That was probably inappropriately dressed.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:21, Reply)

and yet you haven't posted it on here?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:22, Reply)

Yeah. Right. I'm going to do that.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:25, Reply)

i'll forward you some cockgazzes if you do?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

Why would I want cockgazzes, petal?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:28, Reply)

to go with your pink socks?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

pssst. It's an act.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

+ F
technically i guess also n . but it's not as if we have any pedants on here.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:31, Reply)

And THAT'S an fact!

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:34, Reply)

it's Fan act?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:36, Reply)

consider my case rested

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

I'm wearing sandals with a shirt and tie right now
alt: Mirrors. much as you try you'll never get the 'angle of delusion' in a photo
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:20, Reply)

Sandals and socks?
NONCEWEAR!
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:22, Reply)

DEUTSCHWEAR!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:23, Reply)

I tend to wear a black shirt and trousers, and have been summoned as a waiter several times.
I look better in neither, and thus avoid having my photo taken, or heavily process those I am in.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:21, Reply)

you smell of gone off milk as well

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

Racist.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:28, Reply)

When I went to sign the register dressed as Bob the Builder.
Alt: Mirrors. Especially the one's in your sex dungeon.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:21, Reply)

She has the Queen's mirrors in her dungeon?

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:23, Reply)

fo' sho'
Her dungeon was my first experience of digital.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

darling, as if i would ever have anything so low-class as a dungeon
it's a sex-penthouse.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:25, Reply)

It's like Diff'rent Strokes.
Watchu talkin about, Swipey?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

Probably dressed as you describe,
but I'm male. And most blokes slaver over school uniforms, no matter what they/I say.
Alt, mirror. Unless done by a professional, photos are generally awful. Have a trawl through the Flickr B3TA Bash pool if you don't believe me.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:21, Reply)

CAPTAIN TKMAXX BARGAIN BIN!!!!!!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

I am extremely handsome but dress like a teenager from the 70s so it's win/lose for me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:23, Reply)

To be fair, you look somewhat lived in.

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

-Lived + squatted

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

It's like somebody has been using his body as a latrine.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

It's like somebody's used his face as a carpet beater

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

You comin' to lolbash?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:35, Reply)

No one ever invites me :(

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:36, Reply)

It's in the calendar Harters.
THAT's the invite. 29th September - get your ass to Hackney.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:37, Reply)

Only If my Plus one comes

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:39, Reply)

You can shag Swipey if you like.
Everybody else has.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

I need someone with nice legs and and arse?
Is beoncey going?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

'Course.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

Is that how you pronouce Kroney in French then?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

this is so untrue

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:00, Reply)

Mean aren’t they swipey?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:08, Reply)

well, i understand it in stunned's case
i rudely forgot to text him back last night and now he is sulking like a big girly girl
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:14, Reply)

In like Flynn.

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

Good man.
I am looking forward to it.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)

No 60 quid rat infested "hotels" for me, this year.
Night bus to Paddington, late train to Slough followed by passing out and ending up in Oxford*

*I have nearly done this three times so far.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:46, Reply)

berk asked if she could have spare room
you asked if you could have sofa. berk clearly has more brains than you.

both of you can do that, but as warned, it means a 6.30am wake-up on the sunday and leaving the flat at about 9am, so you might want to see if there are better options!

/shit hostess
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:02, Reply)

Can I share the sofa with kroney?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:08, Reply)

Are you willing to pay his "fee" ?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:09, Reply)

'Course you can, sweetheart.

( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:10, Reply)

*french kisses*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:13, Reply)

*sulks*

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)

Kroney is mine back the fuck off

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:10, Reply)

You're the one that needs to be looking for better options, you fuckwit.
In any case, trains home run all night. I'm not overly concerned. Give the sofa up if somebody more deserving requires it.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:10, Reply)

Will you be waking them by screaming GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FLAT NOW!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:11, Reply)

worse than that
A SHOWER AND THEN A HAIR DRYER

just noisy and persistent enough to awaken the dead and increase their hangover.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:14, Reply)

Shower eh?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:19, Reply)

They use his face to induce vomiting in poisoning victims

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

Excellent

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

Probs better than a stomach pump

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:49, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1725489
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:30, Reply)

To be even fairer, you look like a Parisian homosexual.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:34, Reply)

Mon deu!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:39, Reply)

+ i

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

fuck-knuckles

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=L26l5KbQTSs
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

OooooOOOOOoooo
Get elle!
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

I'm dressed as Hitler as I type this

( broadsword, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

I'm dressed as Semen Patel.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

SEMEN PATEL

( broadsword, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:28, Reply)

Hitler was kinda dapper for his time

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:25, Reply)

stop turning monty on

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

Cherrelles best track
www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BV1Ft4BQ1o
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:28, Reply)

Say what you like about the Nazis
but they were always immaculately turned out.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

And brown shirts cover all the worst stains

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:28, Reply)

Tea AND coffee.
Win time.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:30, Reply)

toffee

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:38, Reply)

+of Stalingrad

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:38, Reply)

alt: the camera adds ten pounds
"Just how many cameras were there??"
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

Ten £'s worth?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

I went to a nightclub dressed as a baker once
Not sure if that counts as 'inappropriate' though
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

Tom or Matt?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:37, Reply)

Cheryl Baker?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:39, Reply)

Street?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:39, Reply)

I wish I'd thought of going our dressed as a street
There was a middle aged man that used to go to the same club regularly and he always dressed as Sherlock Holmes. Deerstalker, big pipe, the works.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:49, Reply)

More the 'person what makes bread' type
But I wish I'd had the costumes for all of these suggestions
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

A big scarf, wonky nose, saxophone and a skirt that falls off

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

And Bob Holness

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)

Your mum?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

What about her?
She's busy servicing Paralympic GB at the moment. All of them
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:47, Reply)

Well some of them are very short, I've seen them

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

She likes the ones with Parkinson's best.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:07, Reply)

Thats what you get for watching to much Mr Ben as a child

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)

That's true

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:46, Reply)

I'm an ugly cunt in photos and the mirror

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:36, Reply)

there, there sportscow, we're all hideous gargoyles here

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

Well durrr

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

Is this why its called trolling?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

noo it's called 'the internet', the good looking ones are usually on a beach in st tropez or on the shopping channel

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)

*writes down*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)

I'm up to my nuts in Kim Kardashian
along with most of the NFL. It's a little crowded, but at least we're all pretty.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

Yo can't go up to your nuts in the whole NFL.
You need to draw the line(backer)
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:47, Reply)

No, the NFL is also up to their nuts in her.
Or up to their "balls" olololol
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:47, Reply)

She is a wide receiver, that's for sure

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

Are you saying she has a massive cunt?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:49, Reply)

Yes
Kanye West
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:50, Reply)

hahahahhahaa
POTD
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:52, Reply)

Her arse, right?
That's not glute. That's displacement.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:50, Reply)

Jealousy?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:00, Reply)

What sort of attitude is that, big man?
You're a titan of a man with the looks of Narcissus.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)

My face does not conform the the normal laws of physics

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

See. You bend the physical laws of the Universe to your will.
Nay bad.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

I like this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

-like +gravitate

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:51, Reply)

haha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:51, Reply)

that'd be a great put down
"I'm gorgeous, I'll have you know"

"Yes love, in what dimension?"
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:58, Reply)

And your friends are lightweights, haha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:55, Reply)

Speaking of semen patel
I tried googling the "name" and all I got was this -
www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwEYzS4JgdM
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

He's third from left in this pic
SEMEN PATEL
( broadsword, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:49, Reply)

That's a bit of a predatory look...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:53, Reply)

My body is a temple
but like the Greek one, it's a ruin and the marbles were lost a long time ago.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:52, Reply)

I sometimes wear short sleeved shirts to the office (judge me all you like, but this building gets fucking boiling)
One morning I tripped over as I was on my way into work, as a result I had to greet customers, whilst trying to hide the large scratch down my forearm, not good.

Alt: I prefer mirrors, because at least that image isn't saved.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:53, Reply)

Greet customers?
It gets hot because of all the deep fat fryers?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 14:56, Reply)

No, I don't work in McDonalds anymore

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:01, Reply)

NEW THREAD

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:26, Reply)