Morning all
I'm on a half day today as I have a hospital appointment today - nothing serious, just dermatology to fix my rubbish skin. What are you all up to today?


( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 8:39, 145 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

I think some really are
and it's just an extension of their real life persona. Must be nice to be 12 years old forever ,)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 8:48, Reply)

Happier than I was this time yesterday
Morning all.

I got some good news yesterday, and it boils down to the fact that I'm going to be in gainful employment for at least another a year and a bit yet. Things were looking a bit dodgy for a while, and it seemed that I'd likely be made redundant at the end of this month. But I now have some motivation to do some work again.

Unfortunately, this does mean that I will be spending a few minutes less on here each day. But only a few minutes!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 8:48, Reply)

Yay k2k6
You kept that very quiet, but I understand why. Congrats on your future employment :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 8:52, Reply)

Cheers Becky
It's not something I've been broadcasting. I've been on short term contracts for ages now, but they're always renewed without too much hassle. But this time I was coming to a bit of a cliff edge.

Fortunately, I have now been successful in an application I had in, and that will give me employment until next Oct 2009, with good prospects thereafter.

Edit - What's rubbish about your skin, then? Eczema or something?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 8:56, Reply)

@Al and becky
I just finished reading that thread where woodside industries was complaining about rswipe again and couldn't agree with you more.

why automatically assume that someone defends someone else only if they want to sleep with them? unless obviously he wants to sleep with his buddy JMG.....

@k2k6: that's good news, congratulations
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 8:57, Reply)

Thanks chaps
@al - I didn't actually mean the pictures rule when I wrote that, but it's a valid point!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 9:01, Reply)

Nah
I get adult spots and I'm sick of them, so looks like I might be going back onto roaccutane again. It's evil stuff, but I had great skin for about 2 years after I used it for 6 months. It went back to being rubbish as I didn't want to do the top up 2 months.

Right, I'm off to work, see you guys later :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 9:11, Reply)

Bye Becky
Hello ancrenne.

Will we have the pleasure of your company later, or are you panting all day?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 9:26, Reply)

Morning all
And congratulations k2.

Late start at work today, hoorah! But that also means a late finish unfortunately.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 9:35, Reply)

Dammit!
Just missed you :(
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 9:39, Reply)

Hi everyone.
Adult spots suck Becks.

I have very little to do again today. The boss isn't in till later.

Congrats K2K6 - Don't be a stranger now your going to have to pull your finger out at work.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 9:46, Reply)

Morning all
I seem to have wrenched my stomach muscles at some point. It's quite painful:(
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:00, Reply)

I wrenched mine

showing off on the monkey bars.

Why do I never learn...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:07, Reply)

Ouch.
I have no idea what I've done though. I'm not the most active soul.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:13, Reply)

@BGB
adult spots suck Becks?

how do they manage that?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:17, Reply)

@BGB
As if. B3ta is still more entertaining than work!

@Boss - sounds painful. Maybe you need to do some sit ups to tone those abs, as the Americans would say! :)

Edit@Vipros - through a straw?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:18, Reply)

@K
I may do.
Deciding to get a bit healthier. Was a bit naughty and had a couple of ciggies last night but had none so far today and I'm attempting it cold turkey.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:22, Reply)

No this isn't 6 minute abs

this is 5 minute abs...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:23, Reply)

Morning all!
I managed to cock up the fruit/prosecco jelly I was making last night (not enough gelatin leaves), so I now have a large bowl of what looks like abortion remnants. Dammit. Will try making it again after work today (well, I'll have to, the dinner party is tonight!)
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:28, Reply)

Morning Empress Bob
But does it taste nice?
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:32, Reply)

Maarnin'!
I overslept hugely this morning, meaning my day began with stress. Do. Not. Want.

And: 'grats K2k6, very happy for you!

Mhy best mate got himself engaged last night. It seems we're all growing up. I'm scared, won't someone hold me? *fears*

EDIT: I've nothing against /talk, really. Wouldn't do if we were all of us the same. The sweeping generalisation of all of us being illiterate, lying fat bastards gets to me a bit. It does strike me, though, that for a bunch of people who hate QOTW so much, they don't half go on about it a lot.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:38, Reply)

Where's this
/talk /qotw thread?
I'd like to read it and make my own decision.

Work is dull today.
I'm particularly bored.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:44, Reply)

Good morning to all those who I have not yet greeted
DiT - think that's bad? Some of my mates have kids who are going to secondary school after the summer. Growing up is most certainly vastly over-rated.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:45, Reply)

here
www.b3ta.com/questions/fakingit/post198891
( thealternativefact, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:47, Reply)

I wish I hadn't read that...
"there is somewhat a depth of "community" in the QOTW section, we will defend anyone against the invaders from /talk. Apart from Kaol, of course. He should be thrown to them, knives and all."

:(
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:52, Reply)

Aw, poor Kaol
There was originally a smiley on the end of that sentence though!

And while I'm sure we wouldn't actually throw you to the /talkers, you could probably do them some damage with your knives!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:55, Reply)

Kaol
there was a smiley face after that comment - I think it was supposed to be a joke.

No one's throwing you anywhere. Not on my watch.
( thealternativefact, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:56, Reply)

Hahaha
I know, I was selectively quoting for maximum sympathy...
*shakes fist*
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:56, Reply)

Actually,
I think I would throw Kaol to the /talkers.

You see, he's our secret weapon. Give him enough knives, and he'll rend them limb from limb. And be back in time for tea and biscuits.

Yay for Kaol!
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 10:58, Reply)

I'm off for a meeting
that I have arranged to take place in the local coffee-and-cake establishment.

Mmm...cake.
( thealternativefact, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:04, Reply)

Bourbon?
The crown prince of biscuits.

Or a Hob Nob? The King of biscuits.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:05, Reply)

Yay for Kaol indeed!
*grins*

On a similar note, I'm taking part in a photoshoot on Thursday night where 7 of us in white shirts and black ties are going to be attacking each other with machetes, petrol bombs and baseball bats.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:06, Reply)

Famiily portrait then Kaol?
.
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:25, Reply)

Nah...
Something my mate wants to do *shrugs*
I don't mind, I get to play with pointy things.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:28, Reply)

A Chocolate Oliver
The Emperor of Biscuits.

Although it sounds like something Gary Glitter would dream of...
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:41, Reply)

morning all.
Is anyone about?
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:55, Reply)

Is it me
or is it a bit slow here today?

I just went and did the best part of an hour's work, and came back to find scarcely a half page of new posts.

Must be the lack of cake (and cake-bearing tulips and wanderlusts) this morning. Chocolate biscuits just don't seem to do it.

Edit - that was scary - Wanderlust has just appeared as I was writing about her.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:56, Reply)

I'm about
But, yeah, very slow.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:57, Reply)

Well,
Let's pick up the pace.

Some questions:


Tea or coffee?

Walk or bike?

Ireland or Scotland?

Beef or chicken?

What would you invent, and why?
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:02, Reply)

cheer up chaps
I'll go put the kettle on and we can have a lovely chat.
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:04, Reply)

Good Morning/Noon/After
I am very happy.

Like K2k6 I have just received news that I have a job for next year - well, starting in September.

I think most of the uni funding has just come through so staffing levels can be finalised.

*breathes huge sigh of relief*

*Glees*

*Goes off to find coffee and biscuits*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:05, Reply)

Some answers
"Tea or coffee?"

Tea please - quite strong if you don'tmind, and just a little milk.

"Walk or bike?"

Merrily free-wheeling with one foot on a pedal and the other pushing me along.

"Ireland or Scotland?"

Scotland - the skiing's crap in Ireland.

"Beef or chicken?"

Taken up a new job as an air stewardess?

"What would you invent, and why?"

The shopper's friend (tm). A trolly-mountable cattle prod to encourage idiots, slowcoaches and small children out of your way.
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:09, Reply)

Right then:
Tea or coffee? Neither. Don't do hot drinks.

Walk or bike? Walk.

Ireland or Scotland? Scotland.

Beef or chicken? Difficult. I eat more chicken than beef, so probably chicken.

What would you invent, and why? A time machine, so if I did something that got me into trouble I could go back and fix it.

And congrats, chickenlady. Must be the season for it, eh?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:09, Reply)

answers
Tea, the only time I drink coffee is if I have an espresso after dinner.

Walking.

Scotland as I've never been to Ireland

and I would invent a watch that could stop time but that still allowed me to move about.
Just think of all the possibilities.

oh and ummm chicken i guess. Although bloody steak is lovely.
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:10, Reply)

* Cheer *
Yay for job security.

And Woo! for K2k6 and Chickenlady.
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:11, Reply)

Answers
Tea or coffee? - Tea

Walk or bike? - Walk

Ireland or Scotland? - Scotland

Beef or chicken? - Chicken

What would you invent, and why? - A Zap Gun to zap people out of existence. I'm sure I do not need to explain why.
( thealternativefact, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:12, Reply)

Oooh...
Tea or coffee?
Coffee. Strong Vietnamese coffee, wtih just a smidgeon of condensed milk to sweeten it.

Walk or bike?
Ummmm...bike. Just. I love both.

Ireland or Scotland?
Scotland, no contest.

Beef or chicken?
chicken I guess.

What would you invent, and why?
I don't think I'd want to invent anything right now. In fact, I'd be more for bringing things back: corporal punishment, police powers, non-privatised rail, national service. That kind of thing.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:14, Reply)

Tea or Coffee?

Coffee. Preferably a mocha. In hot weather an iced mocha.

Walk or Bike?

Tough one...love to hike, love to bike. Can't choose.

Ireland or Scotland?

I'll say Ireland because I've never been there and I go to Scotland at least once every year to visit granny and all the relatives.

Beef or Chicken?

Hmm...probably chicken, but I do love a nice rare steak - blue preferably.

Invention.

A usb port which plugs into your brain - like in the Matrix - so you don't need to sit down and take hours to read a book or learn a language, instead you can just plug it in and you know it.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:15, Reply)

Chickenlady
But if you had the usb thing, then you'd lose the pleasure of gradually discovering the book, of letting it unfold at your reading pace. WOuldn't it be boring to just suddenly know it? Or would the usb also give the sensation of having read the book over a period of time?
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:17, Reply)

@ al
That's what I do. Although I'd probably lay off the boobie squeezing.
I know I'd just spend hours arranging people to look silly.
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:17, Reply)

Wanderlust's invention
is something I used to fantasise about as a teenager, so I could sneak into the girls' changing rooms without their knowing about it.

And I dare say I'd use it for similarly nefarious purposes today.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:20, Reply)

I'm going to say:
Coffee - black with sugar and a splash of vodka.

Walking - I hate bikes.

Scotland - I'm more of a spirit drinker than a beer drinker, and I prefer snow to rain.

Beef - Raw-ish, the wonderful fleshy texture between the molars... *shudders happily*

Invention - A teleporter. Only I'd have one. Nobody else. I could go whereever I wanted, or zap people half into walls.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:21, Reply)

Some answers
'noon all, how's tricks?


Tea or coffee? A nice strong black coffee, just like the one sitting in front of me.

Walk or bike? Walk, because I can do it without assistance!

Ireland or Scotland? It has to be Scotland every time.

Beef or chicken? Beef, very rare.

What would you invent, and why? A time machine so I can get very, very rich.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:21, Reply)

Picking up the pace - thanks Kaol
Some questions:

Tea or coffee?

Coffee... Caffeinated, as nature intended with one sugar (preferably brown)

Walk or bike?

What do you think?

Ireland or Scotland?

Scotland. I like Scotland.... Actually, I like Ireland too (the nation gave me my grandfather and grandmother), but I prefer Scotland

Beef or chicken?

Chicken, snarf

What would you invent, and why?

A "Mr Fusion" device which fits under the bonnet of my car and runs on household refuse. I'd fall off the hoverboard.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:24, Reply)

@ Bob
It would only be any good for dull books and things you *need* to know. Not for books that you would read for pleasure.

It would be like speed reading but quicker.

Oh, and you would understand it all too...although that bit might be harder to achieve than simply downloading it into your synapses.

I'm talking like it's really going to happen....
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:28, Reply)

My pleasure, PJM.
I'm glad it worked, haha!
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:29, Reply)

'Lo all
How are you fine folks today? Personally I'm bleary eyed and lacking in motivation.

Must go to bed at a sensible hour tonight, as opposed to tomorrow morning...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:31, Reply)

Some Answers...
Tea or coffee?

Coffee, please. Black as night and sweet as sin, if you would.

Walk or bike?

Bike, I think. But only just, I like walking as well. In fact, walking is better for clearing your head.

Ireland or Scotland?

Scotland: specifically, Edinburgh. Oh, the Scottish ladies with their lovely accents! The haggis! Och aye the noo!

Beef or chicken?

Beef. No, chicken. Actually, beef. Final answer - roast chicken with roast potatoes and yorkshire pudding. Doesn't get any better than that!

What would you invent, and why?

I'd invent a device that would enable me to read other peoples thoughts. Or x-ray specs (but the type from cartoons where they only see through clothes). Or a machine that makes all the sweets you remember from when you were a kid but can't get any more, like Nova Bars or the Galaxy Secret.

EDIT: Ning, DG!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:31, Reply)

'ning D-i-T
My icon's the same as yours...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:34, Reply)

Oh, it'll happen...
Although I think at first it's like to be more of a neurally accessible library rather than downloaded knowledge. So, not so much instantly learning a new language, but having a phrasebook on tap. Course, we still need to understand the brain a little more first.

Just you wait and see. This'll be the first stage, then will come the implants, next thing you know we're all under remote control.

The machines are coming! The machines are coming!

* Comes over all Sarah Connor *

Incidentally, I've been watching the new Terminator TV series - "The Sarah Connor Chronicles". Wasn't too sure at first, but thought it was pretty good towards the end of the first series.
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:34, Reply)

@DiT
I miss secret bars.
Maybe we should campaign to bring them back? It worked for wispa bars!
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:35, Reply)

Speaking of bio-implants
I'd like an implant that digitised your visual cortex, so you could have a record of what you see.

That is probably not too far away, technically.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:36, Reply)

Al,
I read it as that anyway :|

When I re-read it in light of your post, I realised I've got a problem.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:37, Reply)

either way
The wispa came back and that's all that matters.

Dipping a wispa in a cup of tea is yummy. As is biting the ends of a kit kat and using it as a chocolate biscuit straw.
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:40, Reply)

Yes, a visual cortex implant too!
So that when I can remember the face of an actor or someone I know, but can't remember their name I can print it out or put it onto a screen and say, "Them. That's who I mean."

And I'd also like Sarah Connor's arms.

From T2.

Or alternatively the arms of Kate from Lost.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:42, Reply)

Mmmm
Evangeline Lily...

*wakes up*

It is the same, isn't it, DG? Must mean we're both ace or something.

*tries kitkat trick*

*gets covered in wet chocolatey biscuit*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:51, Reply)

@ Al
I've had this discussion with a couple of lesbian friends of mine. We all agree Kate (Lily Evangeline Lily - stupid back to front name) is gorgeous. "Oh yes," says I, "Fantastic arms".

"Eh?"

"Yeah, fantastic arms. Great hair too. But fantastic arms."

"You're looking at her arms?"

Turned out they weren't.

Also at that point a (male) mate added in, "Chickenlady, what on earth would you know? You've not even had sex with a woman."

I felt like a twelve year old boy.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:52, Reply)

Bizarre
Never knew you could get arm-envy!

Although Miss Lilly is indeed shapely in that department. And all other departments too, it would appear, based on the Google image search I had to conduct in the last five minutes, seeing as I don't watch Lost.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:54, Reply)

It's the muscles that do it
She, and Sarah Connor, have nicely toned muscles and look like they could take on the chaps without resorting to looking like Fatima Whitbread.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:56, Reply)

Tofu
Just ate a load of tofu and it wasn't half bad. Mind you I am nursing the dreaded Tuesday morning hangover.
(Oben, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:57, Reply)

Nice
Seemed to have walked into an Evangeline Lilly appreciation thread.

*spluff*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:57, Reply)

Dammit...
Bad: Just got a rejection email.
Good: It's lunchtime.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:59, Reply)

@Kaol
Also good - we're talking about nice ladies. Well, ladies with nice arms at least. In chickenlady's opinion.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:00, Reply)

Evangeline Lily, sure she's pretty
but give me a Monica Bellucia or Salma Hayek any day. older women with shape FTW!

...and hello everybody.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:00, Reply)

For your consideration,
I present another lady with lovely arms - the delightful Claudia Black of Farscape fame. Mmmmm.

Good afternoon folks, how are tricks?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:04, Reply)

Keeping on the shapely arm subject
As well as the Sarah Connor thing, the person playing her in the new TV series is Lena Headey, who is way, way hotter than whatsherface from Terminator 2.

And her arms are nicer too.

...Aaaand it's got Summer Glau in it too. River Tam FTW!

edited for linkage, and glau-iness
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:05, Reply)

@Bert
Gotta love la Bellucci.

At the moment thoug, I'm all about Audrey Tautou. Probably just because of Amelie though.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:07, Reply)

@Fireflier
Ooooh! She's very lovely, she is, her.

I couldn't give a flying flip about anybody's arms though.
It's what's inside, that's what counts. About 6 inches inside, I mean.

@BK Audrey Tatou? Meh.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:07, Reply)

Oh God, Claudia Black...
*loses control*

I always like Gigi Edgley too. *blue*

*buys farscape*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:09, Reply)

I can't think of any men with arms I like.
Matthew McConaughey does have disproportionately small arms though. And did you know that Martin Sheen's left arm is three inches shorter than his right? Fact.
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:09, Reply)

@al
Those three are daytime TV idols wank fodder, we're onto primetime and films now, that's not even the same league.

How's my favourite non-geordie today then?

EDIT @wanderlust What about Man-at-arms from He-Man? He could do terrible things to a lady. Or even Dead-eye Duck from Bucky O'Hare, he'd be well good.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:10, Reply)

Sarah Connors
The middle one - Linda Hamilton after the gym - is far, far better IMHO because she's the right age and looks really tough.
She frightens me...but by god I'd love to have those arms!!

The Three Faces of Sarah Connors
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:16, Reply)

@al I have lots of work to do today
but I'm avoiding it.

I don't watch any primetime shows really...

What about Mia from Californication. Oh. My. Word. She could punch me in the face any time.

EDIT But, chickenlady, in the first one she gets her baps out. Hooray for 80s films!
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:17, Reply)

@bert
Is the duck the one with 4 arms? I'm sure he'd make good use of them. I would however prefer to have a real life person to perv over and not a cartoon mutated duck.
( wanderlust, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:21, Reply)

@wanderlust
Hmm... a real person with arms to perv over...?

Drummer from Def Leppard?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:22, Reply)

A link for those who might be interested
I seem to be on an entertainment mission today. Could it be because I've nothing better to do?

Anyway, I know there are a few Whedon-groupies who hang about here, so here's something in case you've not heard about it, or if you've not been on /links today.

The new Joss Wedon web-only (for now) project:

Dr Horrible's Sing Along Blog

Act 1 up today with 2 and 3 following two days apart.

Starring Neil Patrick Harris, Nathan Fillion & Felicia Day.
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:24, Reply)

Bertie
I'm not interested in her boobage.

I covet her T2 arms. Well, actually the whole T2 body.

I don't desire it so I can crack one out...so to speak.

I *want* it!

I want to do a trade in and have her extremely fit body and she can have my less fit and more cake-friendly one.

But...

One muscled woman - aside from women bodybuilders and Fatima Whitbread - that I find totally unattractive because she's just gone too far, is Madonna.

There comes a point in all women's lives when a decision has to be made -

Face or Arse?

If it's Face then keep eating the cake.

If it's Arse then you turn into Madonna.

It is possible to be too skinny and too muscled at the same time.



I also watch the new Gladiators purely to ogle the women's bodies...again, not for any sexual reason, I'm drooling just the same way I would for a pair or Manolos.

Talking of which, the Horse Faced One has pretty cracking arms but she's too skinny.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:26, Reply)

@al
And he still managed to beat his wife;
it's always heartwarming when someone overcomes a disability.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:30, Reply)

@al
I'm not being mean, I know that the Leppard are ace. I was trying to hook them up, is he married?

@chickenlady I see what you mean now, but I'm comfortable with being a skinny, hairy little freak myself.
Madonna however, makes me want to drink shards of glass. -so that when I see her putrid face, and that god-awful, concentration camp prisoner-esque body, gyrating in one of her frankly terrible videos, I may at least be able to vomit the glass up at will, destroying my television and making me a much happier, dead-er person.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:32, Reply)

I agree about Madonna
I was never really a fan, but she was at least once capable of turning out a good pop song. Now she's just crap and looks scarily like someone who's just about to be released from jail after a ten year sentence spent mainly in the prison gym.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:35, Reply)

@Madame le poulet
I actually find Madonna's and Sarah Jessica Parker's bodies much the same: far too sinewy and scrawny. SJP saves it by having beautiful shoes and seeming to be an ok person though, whilst Madonna just angers me. Dunno why, she just does.

Give me someone softer and prettier anyday (like Salma Hayek, hubba hubba!)
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:37, Reply)

Madonna was gorgeous
when she did the Like a Prayer video and she returned to her dark roots. She was very sexy in a slutty way when she started out too.

Sadly now she just looks haggard and knackered.

Needs to eat more pies.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:38, Reply)

hello ancrenne
I'm trying to proof read a document and write some important letters to say how fantastic our team is.

But really I'm wishing I was at home, in bed. When will I realise that drinking wine and going to bed at 1:30am is sooo twenty years ago?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:38, Reply)

And chickenlady
if it's toned muscular arms you're after, you could do worse than tennis players.

Example 1

Example 2

Example 3

Example 4

It is of course entirely coincidental that all of my examples above are also rather easy on the eye.

Edit - Number 4 seems to have disappeared, so here is another picture of Miss Vaidisova.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:41, Reply)

If I was a bloke
Or of the laydeee lover persuasion then I'd go for Nigella Lawson every time.

I believe I've mentioned that before once or twice...I'm beginning to wonder if I'm developing some sort of fixation upon the buxom baker.

I suspect it's her cakes I'm more interested in...

EDIT - Number 1 tennis player has the same arms as me - not enough definition for me tbh. Number 4 is better.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:41, Reply)

Unfortunately for you, Al,
that link appears in purple for me, which raised my suspicions.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:47, Reply)

As for laydee loving....
I like em butch : )
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:52, Reply)

Well, I am a long-term subscriber.
I do love them, after all.

*stands on bucket*
*wishes he didn't know that was necessary*
*rues watching Channel 5 "documentaries"*
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:52, Reply)

The worst bit was that couple
where the chap got to be Lucky Pierre between the horse and his missus.

Wrong, wrong, wrong.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:56, Reply)

I wasn't aware of this 'documentary' you speak of
and from what I can gather, I'll not be searching the listings to find a repeat!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:57, Reply)

Haha!
Is this the horse-fucking programme that you keep on talking about?

Like when we were walking through the horses in the New Forest?
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:58, Reply)

Horse fucking?
*is lost*

On terrestrial tv?
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:59, Reply)

@ K2K6 - It was a fair and balanced investigation
of bestiality as practiced by fat redneck 'Merkins, on a variety of unfortunate pets and livestock. It may be the wrongest thing I've ever seen on TV, up to and including Tetsuo: The Iron Man.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:01, Reply)

@BGB
Aren't you thinking of Sex and the City?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:04, Reply)

@K2K6
I never think of Sex and the City.

Great big pile of poo that it is.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:08, Reply)

Wookiee...
I kinda liked Tetsuo, it was well worth a watch.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:08, Reply)

Kaol
Admittedly I may have been somewhat the worse for wear when I saw it, but as I recall it's just a succession of increasingly wrong metal-fetish torture scenes with minimal plot, finished off with a half-man-half-tank killing spree.

So I'm not surprised you enjoyed it.

The bit with the vacuum cleaner hose made my eyes water.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:12, Reply)

Two words...
"Drill" "penis"

*grins*
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:15, Reply)

Isn't that film quite famous?
Doesn't he rape a woman with his metal parts?

I seem to remember being shown a clip of it some years ago during a film lecture about cinema and death - the Cronenberg head explosion thing was shown too.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:17, Reply)

I don't think it was rape
She was his girlfriend, and she got a nasty surprise, if I remember correctly.
( Cawl, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:19, Reply)

Ah...
Yes...I've seen that...well, enough to see other people walk out of the lecture theatre.

It was....bizarre.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:20, Reply)

Pffft
I haven't seen whatever you're talking about, but I'm imagining Tin Man and Dorothy getting it on.

She looks like fucking filth anyway.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:26, Reply)

The shoes! The shoes!
Red glittery shoes FTW!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:34, Reply)

*scampers in*
*delivers loads of jelly beans and cookies*

*snogs everyone*

*scampers out again*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:35, Reply)

Did anyone see HLT then.
She's like the Scarlett Pimpernell with cake.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:41, Reply)

They seek her here, they seek her there,
the cake-starved seek her everywhere.

Edit - Woo! Maximum break!

What? It's no more abritrary than 100, and I want a milestone dammit!
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:43, Reply)

Ah, it's like the Spanish Inquisition
In sponge.

*nom*nom*nom*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:50, Reply)

Sup Dawgs!
Hows it going today?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:56, Reply)

*goes to snog HLT*
*realises she's disappeared*

*munches cookies anyway*
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:56, Reply)

*commandeers jelly beans for royal use*
*makes crude comment about flicking them*
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:03, Reply)

So, Bob
Would that make them royal jelly beans? Is that what queen bees flick?

Or am I being too contrived?

(I'm a bit bored, see)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:15, Reply)

@Bob
*Empress of the Universe*

I picture you as Emporer Ming's daughter in that Flash Gorden film.

Edit - Hi Ethel - newbie? Or are we ships that passed in the night.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:17, Reply)

@bgb
I haven't seen Flash Gordon for aaaaages.

Although, I was amused to see that "Flesh Gordon" and "Flesh Gordon 2" were both on sale in HMV for 7 pounds each the other day. I was sorely temped...
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:24, Reply)

In my youth, I purchased Flesh Gordon 2 for comedy value.
The giant Harryhausen-esque claymation cock-man was a little disappointing though.

3/10.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:26, Reply)

Imagine me with my musician's hat on
because it's time to strike up the band. I've got that tune in my head now, so...

*sings*

Flash - ah ahhh - Saviour of the universe

*does Brian May-esque guitar stuff*
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:27, Reply)

@al
Am I ever allowed to change my clothes, in your mind? I'm afraid they'll start to hum after a while, you've got to imagine me wearing other things too (while I wash my cocktail dress and hang it up to dry).
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:36, Reply)

@Bob
We're all desperate to see the Empress's new clothes...
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:38, Reply)

@ Al
For some reason, despite refusing to rent me Reservoir Dogs as "my mother wouldn't approve", the video shop down my road was quite happy for me to hire their finest filth almost constantly from the ages of 14-17, so I had access to a wide range of even lower-budget, bigger-haired, more-unkempt-mimsied video slappers to keep me entertained.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:40, Reply)

@Bob
You do realise that turning up to the London B3ta bash in just jeans and a t-shirt is going to cause an awful kerfuffle with the male B3tans.

I wouldn't risk it if I were you.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:44, Reply)

^
*resists making an hilarious joke by swapping cat for pussy*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:45, Reply)

I'm sorry Al, but that just won't do...
"you are allowed to wear either black lingerie, while you sit cross legged on a wicker chair smoking through an ebony cigarette holder": I'm fine with the smoking bit, but do you have any idea how uncomfortable sitting in a wicker chair whilst not wearing many clothes is? You get wicker-pattern imprints all over your legs, which looks silly.

"or white silk pyjamas, which you may wear while reclining on a white or black leather sofa whilst reading magazines, drinking tea or playing with a cat": Hmmm. I'm not sitting on a black or a white leather sofa. The only acceptable colour for a leather sofa is brown. It's got to be big, shabby and an antique. Also, I'd rather read a good book (unless the magazine is Private Eye, the New Yorker, Little White Lies or Empire), and I'd be drinking gin, martinis, manhattans or a whisky. Or possibly a coffee.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:46, Reply)

@bgb
Yes, I'm feeling a bit of pressure now. I might even wear a dress. But I'm not learning all the words to "all that jazz" just to conform to Al's mental image of me.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:48, Reply)

^
And that is why Bob is the Empress. You can't buy class like that.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:50, Reply)

ok
chaise loungue (sp?) is fine, martini good, I'll even accept the cat (as long as it's a short hair kitten. I'm not so keen on long-haired, especially when they look like they've been hit in the face with the ugly brick). Black silk pyjamas. And I'm keeping my earrings in. Screw convention. I like my earrings.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:54, Reply)

Bye folks.
I'm off home.

If HLT appears again, grab some cake for me.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 16:07, Reply)

I'll be off too, in a few minutes
But I'll likely see you later, in an evening thread.

Cheery-bye
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 16:44, Reply)

Tonight's chat
continues here.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 19:17, Reply)