I've just had a taste of a new scrumpy in the juicer.
Blackberry cider. Man, it was fucking awful. Like a bag of sugar. What excuse do you make to yourself for hitting the boozer at 16.00?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:21, 109 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

liking beer

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:24, Reply)

this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:25, Reply)

Good answer.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:40, Reply)

Anytime after 12 is fine
"It's happy hour somewhere"

I like flavoured cider. Elderflower and Lime was a nice one.
Doesn't half give you heartburn though.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:28, Reply)

Christ.
Cider is made with apples. "Pear cider" is perry.

Everything else is an unholy abomination, and not in a good way.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:29, Reply)

Flavoured ciders are pretty rank.
They do a nice range of the traditional scrumpies here, Thatchers is the house one and at the moment it's Old Rosie, and the disgusting sweet crap. Good cider is an excellent drink.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:42, Reply)

I don't make excuses to myself
because I'm not secretly concerned that I might have a problem.

Seek help.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:30, Reply)

All Cider is shit
No exceptions...

HTH's
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:33, Reply)

It's the only way to be sure
Although I can't think of a good excuse for drinking cider when anything else, even fucking Campari, is available.
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:40, Reply)

ha!
just got an email from the diet I've been doing - they're offering to maybe do a phootshoot of me, but they want before and after pics.

I'm not going to do it, but it's very tempting to just send them pictures of me as larp characters and see if they say yes. That'll learm 'em
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:41, Reply)

Haha, you know what, you could be onto something there.
There are so many niche diets with no USP that "The Bubbily Wrench"* or "Alchemy and Atikins"* might turn a trick.


* I'm too tired to think up a good relivant pun here.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:53, Reply)

it depends on the day of the week
sat or sun it's fine.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:41, Reply)

I've been up since 5am Swipey, so thought this isn't too late.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:43, Reply)

i've been awake since 6 myself
the bloke is a lovely superstar, but my god I hate his alarm clock with a burning passion
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:51, Reply)

I'd strikethrough the 'l' from clock, but no doubt someone else will.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:02, Reply)

i do have an indent in the middle of my back

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:10, Reply)

I almost bought a bowler hat today

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:52, Reply)

You're such a prick :(

( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:54, Reply)

not to wear... I just like the idea of owning one

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:59, Reply)

Well I like the idea of owning an evening waistcoat.
I'd also definitely wear it, because owning nice clothes you don't wear is for benders. On the other hand, wearing bowler hats is also for benders.

Hm. Conundrum.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:02, Reply)

I could use it as a fruit bowl or spitoon

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:03, Reply)

You should take your attitude towards bowler hats
and apply it to your love of coloured trousers.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:11, Reply)

what colour are your trousers?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:14, Reply)

BROWN

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:16, Reply)

brown is a colour, therefor he is a coloured trouser prick lord

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:19, Reply)

as a general point
if someone's trousers are brown only because they have shat themselves, therefore making it impossible to determine the colour underneath, does this still apply?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:20, Reply)

Black. Like any self respecting grown up man.
When in a suit, I'll stretch to grey. When I'm casual I'll even go as far as blue jeans.

Red and pink are for girls.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:19, Reply)

'I conform, that is why I am better'
right.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:21, Reply)

Everybody conforms to dress codes, Cavey. Everybody.
The trick is in not making yourself look a right prick in the doing of it.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:22, Reply)

I am a very snappy dresser

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:26, Reply)

I mostly don't really bother.
Though I'm very good at dressing smartly, when I choose to do so. It's all about observing the code. Which is why I don't look like somebody that habitually chases fat guys in green face paint around a field with a foam sword.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:27, Reply)

codes are for chumps

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:29, Reply)

I'd rather be a well dressed chump
than look like CQ
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:32, Reply)

each to their own

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:33, Reply)

i started the craze of wearing tin can armour

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:27, Reply)

And the world thanks you for it.

( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:32, Reply)

no, that was JP Gaultier

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:58, Reply)

why didn't you?
hats are ace
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:55, Reply)

i almost met you for lunch today
but I didn't get time for it. I've had a handful of raw nuts and some chocolate orange. it's a hard knock life.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:55, Reply)

made me own lunch today, that's £6 saved BOOM

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 16:59, Reply)

You're off the DeathRailway diet then?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:03, Reply)

for the moment
might order some more sachets. I could lose the last nagging half a stone in a fortnight, be good for christmas
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:11, Reply)

one day my love







one day...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:04, Reply)

one day we will bump into each other
and will do the awkward "I know you from SOMEWHERE" truffle shuffle
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:11, Reply)

ent no truffle shuffling to be done over here
I'm as lithe as a gazelle
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:20, Reply)

i was talking about the truffle and parmesan encrusted pasta delicacies in gino d'campo

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:22, Reply)

that guy is a massive massive cunt

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:23, Reply)

but his food is very tasty

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:35, Reply)

As a grown adult, I don't need excuses to do what I wish*


* subject to cash, within the law obvs. etc.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:24, Reply)

You don't have that nagging voice in the back of your head saying
"maybe I'm drinking a bit too much? I do drink quite a lot and I'm not sure drinking in mid-afternoon isn't the step that might tip me over the edge. I'd better lie to myself and try to subtly seek the approval of my peers to make myself feel better during my slow descent onto the liver transplant list."

At least, that's my guess.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:26, Reply)

I drink in the afternoon sometimes, however if I have a couple then I tend not to have anymore to drink in the evening, unless I'm at an all day event, which isn't that often.
I get regular liver function tests (which I need to see if my epi meds are having any effect on my liver) and the results always come back fine. If I ever think I'm hitting the booze to hard/ too often then I have a break from it. Tbh, becoming a dad has improved my drinking behaviour.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:32, Reply)

If your liver tests come back OK, then there's hope for us all.
We really need Stunned to take one. That one test could make a whole lot of people feel better about the kicking they're giving their organs.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:35, Reply)

I got for a beer everyday at four because it's important in maintaining business relationships and a good networking tool.
Plus I fucking love lager.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:39, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPXjYkr5Ywc
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:40, Reply)

Oi!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:41, Reply)

hahahahaha
"me mates all swan about with crumpet, but me I can't get none"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:44, Reply)

It's like the opposite of me!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:49, Reply)

^functional alcoholic^

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:44, Reply)

I have one beer a day!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:49, Reply)

day n hour
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:52, Reply)

Well not beer, but I need a constant supply of liquid or I dehydrate.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:55, Reply)

Okay, sometimes two..........yeah, well maybe more on Saturdays...........but nothing Sundays, as a rule......
Of course last night was different, that was with a meal, but you know, other than that I really don't think I drink too much at all.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:54, Reply)

alright Frogular D
I reckon you'll like Island by the Phantom Band.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:00, Reply)

Alright dozernator?
I've heard that before, s'alright innit
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:04, Reply)

yer
Chemikal Underground have released some right good records.

And ones by Bis :'(
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:24, Reply)

Ent they scotchcunts? Aren't you required to like them BY LAW?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:26, Reply)

they are scottish
And are shit. Like the Proclaimers and Travis.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:31, Reply)

and those benders Franz Ferdinand
And that one hit wonder cunt Mylo.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:32, Reply)

steady on! You'll be dissing runrig next and thats treason!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:46, Reply)

yeah, they were shit too

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:55, Reply)

Bis. Fucking hell.
Manda Rinn was on NMTB and no fucker had a clue who she was.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:34, Reply)

they were shit

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:40, Reply)

I absolutely agree!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:47, Reply)

Anyone who goes to a pub to drink 'cider' made from anything other than slightly rotten apples is a fucking child and barred from drinking in them.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 17:54, Reply)

Decent cider is an excellent drink.
The house cider as I say is the Thatchers, although they get some mad guest ones in. I don't know how that crap in the blue bottles, White Lightning and the like, gets the name of cider.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:00, Reply)

Cider is for teenagers and yokels. That is all.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:05, Reply)

I love cider.
It's lager that's wrong.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:09, Reply)

Ha ha wrong way round pal, what are you? Some sort of Gaylord?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:10, Reply)

^speed walker^
Decent lager is ok, unfortunately most of the muck sold is pretty dire.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:17, Reply)

Paulaner Oktoberfest is some of the finest I have imbibed recently.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:19, Reply)

Not heard of that one.
The lager here is called Hell it's German stuff. Apparently an improvement on Carling and the ilk.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:29, Reply)

*Heil

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:57, Reply)

Dunno about Lord but I am very well represented.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:33, Reply)

But I reckon anyone who doesn't drink a drink they want because they will look like a child _also_ is a fucking child and should be barred from drinking in public

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:45, Reply)

I sent you a request on tapped out

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 18:47, Reply)

yer I'd ruin Katy Perry innit

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Nov 2013, 19:01, Reply)