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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Gid Moaning OT
Enjoy the long weekend? What did you get up to? I ent reading all that rubbish.

I went up to Birmingham with the woman and got superdrunk with friends, allegedly. Apparently there is photographic evidence of me standing on a table and pretending to surf.

Also had Tournedos Rossini for lunch on Monday with the gf's parents which is a very nice way of doing steak.

Alt: What's your favourite cut/preparation of steak?
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:33, 121 replies, latest was 9 years ago)
I like a big fat fillet but only off a proper big dirty beef ... not the feeble tasteless bullocks they normally sell

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:36, Reply)
Startled and brought to me on a plate.
Are you offering to cook me dinner?
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:43, Reply)
I think your face would be startling enough

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:46, Reply)
It's "strikingly unique", thank you very much.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:54, Reply)
it looks like it was struck on the sharp edge of the delivery bed

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:55, Reply)
The surgeon did confess to cutting a little deep during the c-section.
Two eyes is one too many, anyhow.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:07, Reply)
^only man in Christendom who hasn't been up his mum's cunt^

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:08, Reply)
How did you handle the teeth?

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:11, Reply)
left them in the glass on the bedside table

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:17, Reply)
saw friends for an indonesian meal, which was very tasty
saw monts and mini monts and made sure we ruined his weekend by getting her a lego kit full of TINY ninja pieces. monts and snake excelled themselves by eating burgers that looked like towers of meat and bacon and onion rings and cheese and fuck knows what else, plus boilermakers. mini monts and i were v civilised in comparison (a fact that 6 year old mini monts pointed out to me).

went to holland park and lol'd at dumbass tourists staring at the peacocks like they've never seen one before. i mean, standing staring at the same bird for about an hour.

alt: nut roast.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:45, Reply)
there's a peacock down the road from us,
Noisy smelly fucking scrote of a thing.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:48, Reply)
once i thought it would be quite cool to keep a couple of peacocks one day
but the unearthly fucking racket would put you off. the farmer who lives next door to my best mate's dad breeds them, and occasionally they escape into her garden. it's quite a surprise to open the curtains after crashing out on your mate's floor to see a peacock staring back at you.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:50, Reply)
They are the stupidest fucking birds in the world
one of our neighbours had some, they'd get in the garden and stand there looking at you dumb. Any other bird if you throw a stone near it will fuck off pronto as soon as it sees your arm twitch. Peacocks will stand there and watch the stone fly past them. Noisy pointless dumb as fuck blingy pheasants, need shooting the lot of em, guv.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:04, Reply)
I've got a photo of one stuck in a bucket somewhere ... howd up.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:07, Reply)
I'd quite like to see this.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:17, Reply)
I'd also quite like to see this
I thought it was on flickr but it ain't.

Imagine a peacock stuck head first in an old tin bucket.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:19, Reply)
well look at the size of their heads
they can't have very big brains.

i agree, but i think pheasants are dumber. and these things... which by the way, it is illegal to release into the wild if you catch one (as apparently there is only one left in the wild in britain, see also - and more realistically - grey squirrels):

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:12, Reply)
Close run thing with the pheasant on the brain front
given that more than once I've watched one get to the edge of a road, look both ways and *then* run out and get splatted by a car.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:21, Reply)
one once broke its neck on the side of my mates fluorescent van
it was delicious
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:23, Reply)
Ostriches are supposed to be thick as shit as well.
Their added strength allows them to go full-Lenny.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:23, Reply)
ostrich going menkle

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:38, Reply)

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:39, Reply)

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:29, Reply)
Corgi registered, I trust?
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:52, Reply)
kentucky registered i think

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:54, Reply)
Kentucky makes brown ale?
The colonies are catching up, at last!
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:05, Reply)
Alright, I had a big boozy weekend.
My "band" played a "gig" which went surprisingly well, considering the band before us were a weird skiffle folk group and the guy after was a lone Spanish guitarist.

Also I was in London yesterday briefly for lunch with ladypigs uncle. Top bloke, nice dinner at the Royal China on Fulham Road.

Alt: rare fillet, or a fucking gigantic t-bone
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:47, Reply)
we saw a cracking dog that looked like it might be a cross-breed with your gay dogs yesterday
it was brown and white with the white feathery bits so perfectly placed you'd think it had been drawn. so cute.

we also saw a tramp with a long flowing ginger beard and long flowing ginger hair. i won't tell you what meatsnake said.....
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:52, Reply)
uh hurr hurr hurr hurr "bone"

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 9:55, Reply)
nah it wuz shit

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:01, Reply)
Food sounds nice, I assume it was the company.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:04, Reply)
not really, i had a great time! and i made a vegetarian meal for us which was edible too.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:05, Reply)
I died

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:04, Reply)
lucky bastard

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:06, Reply)
I was down in Leeds.
Lots of booze and little sleep.

On Sunday I did my bank holiday trick of meeting mates and getting bladdered because they had the monday off whereas I get floating days and forgot to book it off.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:20, Reply)

Went to a birthday party full of screaming sprogs, booze and massive drugs. The sprogs were confined to the living room while the gentlemen retired to the garden to indulge in recreational pharmaceuticals. Then I went home.

Alt: if it's a proper steak, just seared bleu and served with rock salt and possibly garlic butter. And spring veg cooked in butter and some form of chipped potato. And a nice red. I'm hungry now.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:27, Reply)
star wars day in burnley, no cosplay

Best steak is a Barnsley Chop.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:32, Reply)
I didn't have a beer with Dozer.
And had a nice time in York. Had a really nice meal on Saturday night and some very nice wine.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:34, Reply)
that's a coincidence
I didn't have a beer with Dozer too
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:40, Reply)
You looked pretty wet and miserable on the wall.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:01, Reply)
It was pissing down. But it stopped when we were about a third of the way around.
We only bumped into about 30 people.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:23, Reply)
saw the pic of you standing in the rain
it looked as if you thought you were going to get to have dinner with your 80's playboy centrefold, but dozer had turned up instead. with his moribund cat.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:01, Reply)
It looked as though someone had fitted uPVC windows to an otherwise quite nice house, yet others seemed oblivious to the significance of this fenestrial faux pas.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:20, Reply)
Do you know they charge £10 to get into the Minster and then ask if they can claim the GiftAid on your Donation.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:22, Reply)
Its a fucking rip off
I'd donate a £5 or something but £10 is too steep
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:11, Reply)
Dunno can't remember now
Alt: I usually ask what the vegetarian option is, then have that.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 10:59, Reply)

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:02, Reply)
Newcastle was brilliant but I did over indulge somewhat.
Jamies Italian was crap. Very underwhelming service and food.

alt. rump. well done.
Or a nice thin sliver if it's marinated
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:06, Reply)
Aren't they all deliquent youths or summat?

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:07, Reply)
Jamie's, not Newcastle.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:07, Reply)
They all looked ok. Students making their wage I'd think.
Just a bit clueless.
waited for 2 hours for them to bring a jug of water and then 2 came at once when we were about to leave
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:27, Reply)
chain restaurant in mediocre service shocker
I hope that Alt is an innuendo otherwise you're worse than a vegetarian
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:08, Reply)
It is quite surprisingly mediocre in fairness. And they didn't have any fuckin lasagne when I went.
I'd rather go down the small italian place with the Aberdonian waitress who whose response to things like 'I'd like an irn bru' is 'No you willnae! we've nae got'.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:12, Reply)
Or more realistically 'have a rustlers burger and a little cry'.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:16, Reply)
I don't like ordering lasagna, everyone does it wrong except me.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:20, Reply)
I'm not really that fussy in how it's made.
I always quite liked it from the canteen. Especially if it was a corner piece where the edges were just that little bit burnt.

I'm not too fussed on spaghetti or pasta as I find it can be a bit of a faff to eat.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:25, Reply)
i have a sneaking dirty little liking for salad cream
we were never allowed it as kids because my mum hated it. nor would she let us have white bread.

egg sandwiches with salad cream on white bread - forbidden and delicious.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:13, Reply)
It's been years since I've had salad cream.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:17, Reply)
you should get some
slather yourself in it and then post the pics on here for the lols
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:19, Reply)
bit creepy

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:20, Reply)
well you'd know
dr creep with a phd in creeping from the university of creepers, creeptown, creepshire, united creepdom.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:25, Reply)
why the constant bullying?

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:26, Reply)
I think it's because she thinks you're a wanker

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:57, Reply)
Really nice on boiled potatoes too

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:19, Reply)
You should go to Louis Restaurant for a meeting with Michael Corleone

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:19, Reply)
I didn't have a beer with stunned

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:34, Reply)

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:40, Reply)
Good old Mum!

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:50, Reply)
where did you eat in York?

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 11:58, Reply)
ha ha blanked, loser

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:15, Reply)

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:20, Reply)
Good afternoon
Not too bad a weekend at all. No work done, plenty of nice grub and wine and only Sunday as a washout. Builders in all weekend so extension coming along nicely now.

All of them
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:04, Reply)
Leg of cow raw pls

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:08, Reply)

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:11, Reply)
bloody cornish savage

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:11, Reply)
I have my steak like I have my sexual intercourses, rare! lol
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:30, Reply)
Me too
Bloody and beaten with a tenderiser
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:34, Reply)
ha ha well done ha ha another little joke for you there lol

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:40, Reply)
And me. Off a junkie outside a pub!

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:44, Reply)
a joyless facsimile because of crippling squeamishness and sanctimony

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:46, Reply)
so do i
full of nuts
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:48, Reply)
tee hee
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:55, Reply)
ha, brilliant

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:56, Reply)
and whoever designed that flyer should be sick on themselves as well
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 12:58, Reply)
The one I got was of a similar standard.
I think they must've hired the same bloke that does the trade mags that parts companies send to haulage firms.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:02, Reply)
did it have a slightly ropey bird in a swimsuit posing on the front?

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:08, Reply)
not far off it.
Maybe if I vote for them they'll send me a great big calendar with photos of naked women in front of some lorries.
(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:09, Reply)
^someone nicked one of them from their dads work/office when we were kids. Probably my first encounter with grot that.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:10, Reply)
I like my naked ropey birds posing with plumbing parts

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:11, Reply)
alright emvee

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:13, Reply)
oh now ... there's no need for that

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:14, Reply)
Polish Emvee

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:14, Reply)
something something "plumbers wipe".

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:15, Reply)
the well of sexual innuendo in plumbing is just too deep to fathom

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:18, Reply)
I attribute my poor scores in my cryptology module at University to being too busy sniggering every time the lecturer mentioned a 'nonce'.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:20, Reply)
Presumably he used ROTunder13?

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:23, Reply)
lol very good.

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:30, Reply)
*adjusts ballcock*

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:20, Reply)
not in my top 10 thermostats, soz

(, Tue 5 May 2015, 13:27, Reply)

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