
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I was waiting for you to do this as I couldn't be bothered really.
Are you well this morning?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 7:54, Reply)

I'm ok, quite tired though. How's your fine student self?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 7:56, Reply)

And also tired.
I get to miss my classes today and go on a course about how to use some fancy new computer program, which should be good. Mostly it will be good due to the missing-my-normal-classes thing.
Busy day ahead?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:01, Reply)

Just thought I'd do a bit of last-minute post-whoring (now with added de-RIS in the last replies in case you still don't get it).
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:02, Reply)

I must head off now and go do "dat uni thing". Don't want to be late for this thing.
See y'all later.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:05, Reply)

I'm in earlier today. Not sure why, seemed like a good idea at the time...
*yawns*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:16, Reply)

It made my brain hurt a bit.
Hello Lab! *ensnuggles*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:16, Reply)

It's quite early and I've already had to clear up dog sick today
:(
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:18, Reply)

He's fine now. He threw up on the front room floor then skipped off to watch the birds in the garden.
I still haven't had breakfast yet though. I think I'll shower first.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:22, Reply)

How are we all today? It's a bit dull and dark here in the north this morning. Hope it's nice and bright where you are.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:26, Reply)

The 30 seconds of daylight I saw this morning looked quite nice to me.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:37, Reply)

Even though I stayed up too late last night, I'm fine thanks. Weather is mostly bright here in West-London. Have decided to go to work earlier so I can leave work early enough to catch the bike-repair shop before it closes.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:39, Reply)

It's a beautiful morning here, crisp but fairly clear skies.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:42, Reply)

and now I'm getting some shooting pains in my abdomen, which happens when my back goes (I don't understand the anatomical reasons why, it just does!)
It's a bit uncomfortable!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:45, Reply)

Poor K2k6 - I have managed to faff up my left knee and both ankles - damned exercise.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:49, Reply)

* kisses k2k6's back and abdomen *
* kisses LVP's knee and ankles *
Anyway, I must finish getting dressed and head to the office. Have fun all you day-shift people.
Got a new QOTW to look forward to when I get back. Let's hope it's one about stuff you've invented.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:52, Reply)

Morning my lovelies. Are you all happy?
I just want to carry on sleeping, but I can't!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 8:54, Reply)

Tired, in bed by midnight, and awake and full of the joys of Spring at 3ish. It's the first time in ages that's happened to me.
And I set fire to my hand last night.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:00, Reply)

Oh yes, please. Sounds like the very thing.
Spakka helped a bit, although I'm not sure how I feel about blokes kissing my abdomen...
*passes on feelgoods to LVP's knee*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:02, Reply)

*blows healing raspberry on K2k6's tummy*
There, that should make it much better :)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:07, Reply)

Sorry to hear about your knee LvP, my left knee usually plays up after vigorous exercise, so I can appreciate your discomfort :(
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:09, Reply)

It's something I have now added to my things Never To Do. I over filled my zippo, got the fluid on my hand and then lit a smoke!
EDIT Sam, why are you under that table?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:10, Reply)

They might ask me to do something, or want to speak to me. I've banned speaking to people for today, and possibly the foreseeable future.
It's alright, quite comfy down here!
Edit: have done that many times with a Zippo, one of the reasons I don't use them any more.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:15, Reply)

*tries to tempt Sam out with cake* nommy nommy!
It's my last day! I do have to do some work but I have a strict no work before 1030 rules
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:18, Reply)

It's the first and only time i've done it. Plain stupidity if you ask me, I blame B3ta, I was preoccupied at the time!
Comfy under the table you say, I think I'll stay here in this bed if it's all the same.
EDIT Boo on the last day Badger *hugs*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:18, Reply)

I thought exercise was supposed to be good for you! And here I am, hobbling about like a wooden man.
Edit - I got propositioned by a Polish man whilst I was buying cake yesterday.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:18, Reply)

Gmail has themes! I have ninja mail now! It makes me far too happy :p
*shares glee with all*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:20, Reply)

It's far too early in the morning for cake!
You should consider it your right to do no work today, along with sabotaging as many systems as you can, stealing anything valuable and having a shit in the bosses top left desk drawer, where he keeps his special pens.
Dok - bed would be better, sadly I have no more paid sick days left!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:20, Reply)

I'm not mean enough or feel angry enough against them to do stuff like that. *is nice really*
Lab no plans, maybe the pub at lunchtime.
It's never too early for cake!!!!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:22, Reply)

It was rubbish.
I'm tired, stayed up too late doing the comic.
There's some nice feedback so far though!
*grins*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:23, Reply)

Besides, revenge is fun!
Where are these ninja themes of which you speak? I just logged onto my Gmail and can't find them... I did have an email from the Republican party in response to my drunken post-election insults, LOL
Edit: Kaol, the comic is good, will head over to the appropriate thread to leave some feedback. Good day oop north yesterday?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:24, Reply)

settings - themes
And they didn't want to make me redundant but they had to. They all seemed very upset about it too. It's only a small business that is kinda going under :(
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:26, Reply)

I hope everyone is ok this fine morning! God my shoulders are sore today...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:27, Reply)

My mong foot is turning black, so I'm trapped at home again today.
Thank god for wasting away the hours here :)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:30, Reply)

I'm surprised you dodn't notice me last night! I've still not got up, I don't think I'll ever get up, I like it here.
Sam, I'm working from here, well I say working. How about some cool refreshing beer, will that tempt you out?
No it's never to early for cakey goodness.
*looks for cake*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:30, Reply)

Or I'm tired and it's early and I can't find it.
Is it a separate tab under Settings?
Or have you been shagging Larry Page again?!
Edit: Dok, I've been trying to blag home working for ages and they won't go for it. Sounds like my ideal way of (not) working..
Beer is far more acceptable in the morning than cake!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:31, Reply)

I just looked and couldn't find it either.
She's talking shit, I think.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:34, Reply)

last tab on the settings page.
Although when I logged in I had a nice yellow bar at the top that told me about the themes.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:35, Reply)

Not me.
I don't have a themes tab on my gmail :(
Here then have beer.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:35, Reply)

I've got to drive to Cumbria and back again tomorrow...
*sighs*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:36, Reply)

The seat is filled already by my mate.
Plus you can't drive with The Foot Of Doom :(
How's it doing?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:38, Reply)

Obviously they haven't enabled it on all of the accounts.
Maybe they're punishing me for using 2GB of my storage space.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:38, Reply)

www.b3tards.com/u/14ebb740f3120de4f77d/ninjamail.jpg
You gits
hahahaha good one lab :p
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:38, Reply)

Ahoy Colonel!
Kaol - it's a Geordie word for shite, I believe
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:46, Reply)

is sponsored by the word FLOMP.
How's you Colonel S? *rubs beard*
*glees*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:47, Reply)

It's short for Evil Pixie. As she is evil and short.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:49, Reply)

I have a headache, time to mug the secretaries for drugs.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:49, Reply)

Bone (informal) - Said of something that is rubbish or broken.
No, not the FLOMP again!
*hides under duvet*
I'm not coming out now!
Hi Colonel!
Badger, you forgot the numbers 6 and 9.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:53, Reply)

and apparently it's propagating across all the Gmail accounts, so we'll have it soon...
Unfair though, I was one of the very first people to sign up for it! *evil looks at TGB*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:54, Reply)

I was quite early to sign up. EP has a googlemail.com account though! So it must be pretty random
Dok get out of there!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 9:58, Reply)

that badger is slowly climbing in the polls!
EDIT But I find it a bit disturbing that more people like badgers then cock or lady bits.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:07, Reply)

Ha ha! I get it! With the badges, you are the BADGE-ER!
*sigh*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:08, Reply)

If you are really good I may come and see that music thingy you are doing on the 6th Colonel S.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:12, Reply)

Are we already talking about cock and ladybits?
I love it here.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:19, Reply)

Yes they were mentioned.
Pull up a pew, take the weight off, and have a good time, coz lady bits soothe even the savage beast!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:22, Reply)

How goes it?
I've emailed you a certain special something.
EDIT: Dok, what about a savage gay-man-beast?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:23, Reply)

I'm nearly healed, just have to wait and see if I scar now...
And yeah, I just read it. Good stuff.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:25, Reply)

because I have ladybits and a FLOMP and I have no idea what this crap with boats is all about but I doubt it's as much fun as say, watching me jump up and down on a trampoline *jumps*
*waves at Scarpe from the trampoline*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:27, Reply)

It's BOAT. And incredibly, it edges out you on a trampoline.
Vote BOAT
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:31, Reply)

Maybe, I just don't know any savage gay-man-beasts.
*watches Badger bounce from bed*
*poing*
*poing*
*glees*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:32, Reply)

Glad you liked Episode 4!
The first frame from it, minus the text, is now my background on my work computer.
*grins*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:33, Reply)

In fact, I BOATed for BOAT.
Can't crowbar it into my username very easily though.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:35, Reply)

Incredulously, there are rumours that my work wants to introduce a company wallpaper that'll be mandatory for all workstations.
I have compiled a list of my thoughts against such a petty proposal, as I cannot see how they'd be any benefit.
I await the next meeting with caged anger.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:35, Reply)

We also accept BOAT as a sig. We are non-discriminatory.
BOAT
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:36, Reply)

Is a byway open to all traffic. That doesn't sound exciting at all.
My work computer background is the standard dell one. Woo me
*bouncy bouncy bouncy*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:37, Reply)

Will they lock it down so you can't change it?
This is part of our IT policy (although I'm obviously exempt), I've always thought it was fairly pointless since people had programs open all the time...
Plain black (with a lot of icons) FTW...
@ swordBOATtromBOAT, sig changed!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:38, Reply)

Mine is http://www.flickr.com/photos/30972882@N05/3001541127/
I'm also thinking of gettimg it as a tattoo.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:41, Reply)

No details as of yet, they have just said they want it uniform. Nobody will see it, but allowing us to personalise our workstations leads to a more relaxed atmosphere, even if it's only a little.
I don't see how removing this tiny liberty adds anything to the company. It just reeks to me of a middle manager justifying his job by making quantifiable minor changes.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:42, Reply)

It's one of the points of our policy I can't see any point in myself. Although it's not nice when people use the shite Windows 98 themes and annoy everyone else with monkey noises every time they close a window etc.
Certain other things, like banning USB drives and CDs, filtering the internet, banning coloured email writing and stationery etc make sense for various reasons, but I've always thought the background thing was petty.
It gives me an extra excuse to be a bastard though, when people have pics of their ugly kids/pet dog/caravan (I kid you not!) and I go and ask them to restore the company one...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:45, Reply)

I never got around to playing American McGee's Alice, it came out when I was very skint :(
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:45, Reply)

Get them to contract me as the desktop-designer :D
I'll make them new ones once a week.
That might just be frames from my comic...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:45, Reply)

The thing is, we're a small company, largely made up of 'IT Professionals'. I don't mind changes being made, but I hate pointless change that serves no purpose.
Kaol: One sycophantic minion has already knocked up a background for them to use. I can't comment on it, as I'm deeply biased against the change.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:47, Reply)

want a background now!
Kaol - have you got yours without writing and in any better resolution? I need 2560x1024 for this computer...
Edit: Lab if you're IT professionals then there's no excuse. I only do it to stop the
And they should realise that geeks become very cross and mutinous when forced to conform to pointless rules that have no relevance. Hence why nothing is said about the fact I play games all day and ignore everything on the IT policy I wrote, even though I'm supposed to lead by example...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:47, Reply)

It's either that or a Phoenix, and I'm leaning towards the later.
Either that or The White Rabbit from the same game, but I can't find any good reference pictures for it!
EDIT Helloooo there Boss.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:52, Reply)

I fancy getting something tattooed on me but can't decide what. Been thinking for a while.
And this week I will stop procrastinating (since it's relevant) and pierce my ears again.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:54, Reply)

Here you go!
www.b3tards.com/u/33b5702509926c2beff6/rabbits-fire-desktop.jpg
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:57, Reply)

It wouldn't be too big, but yes it would be in colour.
Lab I could do Alice with the Cheshire Cat, chasing the White Rabbit, right across the top of my back.
EIDT In the poll Badgers have overtaken Nick Griffin. Yay
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 10:58, Reply)

That makes a wicked background!
PS - if anyone else has two monitors and wants a background which stretches across both, I don't think Windows will do it. You need UltraMon (which has about a billion other useful features, I couldn't face using multi monitors without it)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:00, Reply)

That sounds like a really cool tattoo! I approve and endorse it :D
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:00, Reply)

but did anyone just see the guy they interviewed on This Morning?
He was dressed as some kind of fop, and was there to take part in a conversation about prostitutes.
He claims to have slept with other 1000 tarts.
Quote "It's quantity and not quality but it is rather impressive isn't it!"
*edit* he was this cockend - en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sebastian_Horsley
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:05, Reply)

Cool! Next target is byways open to all traffic. Badgers do not like these as big 4x4s can go down them and run over my fellow badgers. :(
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:05, Reply)

I may just do that, when I find a good artist, and have the spare cash, but I think the phoenix (and all it symbolises) should be first.
EDIT Hi Mrs Bin, how are you today?
Yes Badger, the BOAT will be caught, and strung up like the devils they are!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:05, Reply)

I'm in the office today after my day of advantures yesterday, it makes a nice change except for the loud man in the office next door who needs to be stabbed!
*sharpens Stanley Knife*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:07, Reply)

Only 1000?
Poor show, that man, jolly poor show!
Everyone knows that killing one is worth ten fuckings.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:07, Reply)

Looks like a prize prick.
bill - Stanleys are for slashing, not stabbing!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:08, Reply)

I've still not eaten anything though.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:09, Reply)

Bad news....
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/7738933.stm
He's trying to push through some final bastardry before he goes...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:12, Reply)

*Waves Madly Back*
*Puts down Stanley and goes to find the letter opener*
Better Sam?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:16, Reply)

some god awful stomach bug thing.
Everything in my guts wanted out and it didn't care which route it took or for hanging about.
Mr Bin has been sent home poorly too as he thought he might have caught it and he didn't want to pass it around.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:18, Reply)

And I will be happy...
Colombian necktie also acceptable.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:18, Reply)

A friend's got that too :( She just got over a nasty cold, and then is hit by a random stomach illness :(
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:21, Reply)

That'll keep him quiet!
*Performs Necktying*
*Is detained for questioning*
*Explains to officers about the loud drone like talking*
*Is let off with a warning*
Anyway, now that that's out the way I can go back to being all sweetness and light!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:26, Reply)

I have stuff that really does need doing before I leave *tries to motivate self*
Epic Fail
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:31, Reply)

That sucks! Feel better from the power of *AWESOME HUGS*
Glad you got away with it bill, now come back to the realm of teh fluffeh!
It's even stevens in the poll now, remember your vote counts!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:31, Reply)

They should be buying you cakes and beer today, and doing a gold clock presentation, if you're leaving. Can't expect you to do any work!
I still don't have Gmail themes...
And now I have to go and explain to the boss man why I need to spend £5000 on new hard drives *is
a bit scared*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:32, Reply)

It's been all go this morning. Bloody patents. Why can't we just keep our inventions secret instead? It would be so much easier and cheaper!
*grumbles*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:32, Reply)

Within 5 minutes - 3/1
5-10 minutes - 2.5/1
10-20 mins - 4/1
20-40 mins - 5/1
40 mins - 1.5 hours - 6.5/1
Any takers?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:36, Reply)

I will have to go again soon.
Like now, in fact.
Bummer.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:38, Reply)

Dok - betting is only allowed in real currency. And especially not Star Trek currency (I had to look it up)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:40, Reply)

I was drunk and the change fell out of my pocket.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:42, Reply)

when I started eating or now that I've finished?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:46, Reply)

20 - 40 mins and 1 of the queens finest
*SIREN SOUNDS*
Uh oh it's bad joke time
Little Boy: "Miss, do you know what a Shitzu is?"
Teacher: "Yes, its a small dog"
Little Boy: "No it ain't, it's a zoo with no animals in it"
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:48, Reply)

From 11.34, the time you posted that you had porridge. I think that's the fairest way.
Dok, I will accept Krugerrand at current gold prices.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:50, Reply)

There was once was a fella called Wookiee
Who pined for some deviant nookie
To catcalls and squeals
He minced round in heels
But it never resulted in cookie*
A knife-wielding rogue name of Kaol
Is likely to end up in gaol
His burning desire
To set whores on fire
Means Clendrix is saving for bail
A sexy young lass name of Lusty
Will not like your beard if it's crusty
But if it is neat
And down to your feet
You're on to a winner there - trust me!
*Black-American slang version of the word
Your turn.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:50, Reply)

There once was a b3tan called clendrix
Who spent too long listening to Hendrix
Whilst rocking out
She gave her foot a clout
And is currently off work, and I can't think of a rhyme for the endrix.
(poor, I know)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:53, Reply)

Drixy, brilliant. Now you know you'll have to make them up for the rest of us you know that don't you!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:53, Reply)

I love writing limericks! I like a bit of structure and restraint, me.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:55, Reply)

There once was a bloke called Lab
Whose attire was seldom drab
His mo used to purr
and everyone did concur
he was a tiny bit awesome and fab
See I am nice :p
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:58, Reply)

I'm shite at writing limericks, trust me on the if nothing else.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 11:58, Reply)

There once was a man called Dok
And my room I did forget to lock
So he jumped in my bed
pulled the duvet to his head
Till I chased him out with my glock*
*note how I refrained from the cock route
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:04, Reply)

I'll write as many as I can and then stick 'em all up on a new OT thread.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:05, Reply)

bit on Playschool where they would show you how everton mints are made.
Look - it's how pizzas are made. I love the pepperoni adding machine.
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/7733602.stm
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:14, Reply)

*pays 20p in coppers*
If one more person here takes the piss about me hitting that tree, I'm gonna slice some nuts.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:22, Reply)

I meant "people at work" actually :p
You're safe, I could never bring myself to slice you.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:26, Reply)

There was a young lady called Badger
To get home she had to run faster
To Herr Dok in her bed
With a Glock to his head
But he got her back with his dagger.
Yes Badger I noticed that, how restrained of you!
EDIT KAol didn't drive into a tree, the tree too a dislike to his van and keyed it!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:27, Reply)

So... The satnav told me to go up a long, very steep and narrow road.
That was fine.
It was pissing it down with rain, which was a bit rubbish, visibility was poor.
So, after about a mile, when the concrete of the road abruptly stopped, and was replaced with slippy mud, I didn't see it straight away.
Got the van stuck, miles from anywhere.
I say stuck, the wheels were spinning, and the hill was too steep to keep going up.
So... "Reverse!" I thought...
Is skidded backwards, uncontrollably, kinda diagonally.
Scraped across a tree, from the back bumper to the front one.
Took the wing mirror off, driver's side, and cracked the rear light, plus lots of scraping.
No big deal really... Except I had to reverse a mile down a narrow lane with my head out the window...
Got the mirror "fixed" though, good job I happened to have electrical tape with me.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:31, Reply)

really? How terribly sweet!
*hugs Kaol*
*will never mention the tree again*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:32, Reply)

and missing the loo, I think I am going to have to throw away all my bogside books. (I don't want to catch this back).
The problem is, is it OK to buy books just to put them in the bathroom?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:32, Reply)

Have to pay a bit more attention to it when driving a van...
(former driver of an XLWB hi roof, which doesn't go everywhere a car will, even though you can drive it on a car license)
Edit: Yes Mrs Bin, definitely. The New Scientist ones are good (Do Penguins Feet Freeze, Does Anything Eat Wasps etc), I have them all in my toilet! Also the Guardian notes & queries one, anything with small sections that you can dip into. Or shit on, whatever floats your boat.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:34, Reply)

Print out this thread - you can then wipe your arse on it when you're done.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:34, Reply)

What did you bet on? You just said the newcomer!
I think you may owe me gold before too long...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:37, Reply)

I feel safe enough to be further from the loo.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:40, Reply)

hence newcomer.
Mrs Bin, could you please be all sicky now, I need some gold. I'll share it with you 80-20 to me.
EDIT Damn I knew I shouldn't have used the power of *AWESOME HUGS*, she's getting better!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 12:41, Reply)

Had a busy hour or two, but have just eaten lunch and feel slightly more human :)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:03, Reply)

Don't do it! I'll lose all me lucky charms.
/Leprechaun
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:03, Reply)

I wanted to, but colleague wanted to go to Somerfield instead, and I was too lazy to go from there to the magic jacket potato shop.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:08, Reply)

Welcome back. Did you have something nice?
Drixy, get on with the limericks! Please.
*hugs*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:09, Reply)

I've only written one more :(
I'll do some more later, I promise.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:12, Reply)

You take your time.
I'm going to collect them in a document, and use them to make millions when you're famous.
Did you like mine?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:13, Reply)

Now my office smells like mouldy fanny.
*sads*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:14, Reply)

That's bad, and that smell gets into everything!
*gets fabreeze*
Sushi, you lucky devil!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:17, Reply)

It's the afternoon. Hoorays. That makes it the lunchtimes.
All well here?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:23, Reply)

You've wrote one about me haven't you!
Go on let me see it, please, I'll give you hugs and beer, not at the same time though!
Hi PoD and Boss.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:24, Reply)

I'm on the list, I was feeling a little left out of the listmania recently as I'm not a BNP member!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:40, Reply)

What were you felling?
I forgot to mention earlier, I think I've got a stalker on Warcraft. I helped them out with a couple of things the other day, and now they keeps PMing me. She's(?) even told me her real name(?), age(?), and stuff, and asked me for my A/S/L!
I'm a bit afeared. Heeeelp!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:49, Reply)

*hides*
Looked at that Ion drumkit Dok, it looks ok for the price. The one I have is more expensive buy much better.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:56, Reply)

Yup I'm ready. Hit me with your rhythm stick baby!
EDIT Yeah, but it's for a 10 year old, and he'll get fed up with it after a couple of days.
EDIT 2 you can talk about WoW PoD! But honestly this is the first time it's happened in my 3 years of playing!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:56, Reply)

*looks at time*
3 hours...
Then it's drinking/curry/guitar night!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:58, Reply)

A beautiful girl named Ancrenne
Is truly a B3ta doyenne
She wafts through the threads
Like the smell of fresh bread
Enticing us time and again
A charming old codger called Dok
Spends weekends dressed up in a frock
He colours his lips
And wiggles his hips
And we all love him too much to mock
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:58, Reply)

The boss isn't here! I'm sure if it was her mouldy fanny I'd have known about it by now. She would have probably whipped it out and made me have a sniff.
Oh God! I've just made myself feel ill.
*cries*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:58, Reply)

These are fun!
Do me, do me!
I mean a poem
Oh fucking hell, Lusty!
*bokes*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:59, Reply)

and only 3 hours left....
Dok, that IS what you get for playing Warcraft!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 13:59, Reply)

Ha ha!
*lablols*
I'm picturing the scene...
*spews*
Edit@clendrix - there are some useful rhymes with 'six'...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:00, Reply)

More!
More!
More!
Yeah Sam but it stops me being bad to people. I had to logout last night and spend all my time here, due to the constant messages!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:04, Reply)

I'm at home having been on my course this morning. Working from here for the rest of the afternoon, or that is the plan anyway.
Take that, office dwellers :P
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:05, Reply)

I don't like to keep cluttering up the home thread with all this stuff, and I do also need to limp round to the shop in a martyrish way.
I'll work on some later and post a new thread for them tomorrow :)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:06, Reply)

that the only thing that rhymes with badger is nadger.
I've just got back from the pub and am somewhat drunk. Woooooooooooooooo
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:08, Reply)

I got an official warning on a game I play for calling someone a pussy! Turned out he was 12.
In other news, my office just got invaded by about 20 mongs, on some sort of mong school trip to learn about the company or something. Weird!
Edit: tadger! And Bodger is also probably acceptable, cos of the TV series.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:09, Reply)

do I have to refer you to Kaol for correction?
I will write more, I promise.
Edit: Badger, admittedly you will be more of a challenge, but I shall give it a go.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:09, Reply)

although I'm less keen on being on Kaol's.
*worries*
@TGB - tadger? (may be a Scottish expression)
Edit - damn, Sam got there first.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:11, Reply)

There once was a girl called Drixy
Who looked to incredibly sexy
She went out one night
And got in a fight
Now she’s turned into a piskie
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:11, Reply)

All cock related rhymes :(
I don't even have one *cries*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:12, Reply)

Both lists are poetic, but I suspect that Kaol's is rather more artistically final.
Edit: Dok, it's a work of art.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:12, Reply)

I'm sure you could get one from somewhere. Ask Kaol for a knife! Take a look further up the thread I posted one!
EDIT Thanks Drixy, one tries!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:14, Reply)

I haz teh tireds. I've been awake since 4am, and I'm on a late shift as well.
*nods off*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:23, Reply)

*Hugs LvP and HLT*
Both well I hope?
I'm not talking to your boobs, honest!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:26, Reply)

They are second syllable rhymes actually ;P
Hi Shimmies and Aunty Lucy.
*hugs*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:27, Reply)

Both I and my boobs are fine thank you!
I've been to college and the gym and am now killing time before going to pick Mr VP up from Bath Spa station for our long weekend together.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:27, Reply)

Sam some money.
Still keeping the contents on my stomach on the inside!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:27, Reply)

*huggles*
*talks to their boobs* How are we all?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:28, Reply)

What on earth would they say?
I hope it is fun Lab, we're off to visit my sister in Swansea. We're going to have sushi and drink lots. It's going to be ace.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:31, Reply)

They'd say "Hmmmpf! Uh Rmmahgrr-tmmmpf urr impf raaarrmpf!"*
*Translation: "Help! I'm suffocating in this bra!"
Edit: OI!! TGB!! I don't have moobs!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:34, Reply)

I'l stop the limericks soon. I promise, but here's another two for you!
I met a bloke called K2
Who had to go out for a poo
He sat on the bog
squeezed out a log
And then he did bid me adieu
I once knew a girl named Grammar
Who was made up of all of the glamour
If you told her she's wrong
She would come on all strong
And smash in your head with a spanner!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:39, Reply)

surely it'd be something like
"Go on, motorboat us, you know you want to."
Edit: & Hello!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:40, Reply)

I don't think they would. Motorboating is very ticklish.
And an odd thing.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:42, Reply)

I like that Dok!
And if you say so Lab. I haven't managed to get you to take your shirt off. Yet ;)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:42, Reply)

I wouldn't know, I've never motorboated. Or been motorboated for that matter.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:43, Reply)

You do know that with that comment you've just admitted to having moobs!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:44, Reply)

Trust me, there is nothing remotely erotic about it. I had a fling with a young Austrian who very much enjoyed it.
I however, did not.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:44, Reply)

I've also never participated in a motorboating. I suspect also it'd be far too ticklish at the moment with my competition beard now in full hobo mode!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:45, Reply)

I don't have moobs at all, just saying no one has tried to motorboat me!
*gets defensive about moobs*
LvP, I can see how it might be funny once, but I don't have a burning desire to do it.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:47, Reply)

by drunk friends in the pub. So it was funny. I can't see it being erotic though.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:51, Reply)

We believe you, no we do honestly.
And the last one for now,
There once was a young bloke called Kaol
Who like to walk in the dale
He went up to Fife
Where he pulled out his knife
But the police seamed to miss that detail
EDIT I have never or would I motorboat a lady, it would be boorish.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:52, Reply)

I've done it to housemates as well whilst super drunk.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:54, Reply)

Did you enjoy it?
Edit: Dok, seems we are the gentlemen of OT today!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:54, Reply)

They are weird those Austrians. Can't say I've ever been motorboated either, sounds fun though.
Kaol - not bad, not bad... My daily blade is one of these, although mine is the version without the serrated blade. Obviously I also have bigger knives for special duties. Not sure whether it's sad, paranoid or just plain illegal that I take one to my office job....!
@ all those who owe me money - payment by tomorrow please or the boys will be coming round to explain my exorbitant rates of interest in a rather, er, physical fashion. Ta.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:57, Reply)

I was proper Aunty Lucy yesterday, I went to see my friend who has a 2 week old baby and a toddler. So I cuddled the baby and had cake and talked about Star Wars with the toddler.
What a good afternoon.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:59, Reply)

We are, or at least I would be if I wasn't still in bed! ;)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 14:59, Reply)

I never had an aunty that talked to me about Star Wars *sads*
Make sure you impress the fact that only pre-1990 Star Wars is acceptable.
I may also be in Swansea this weekend, to warn you before you get accosted by a random hippy in the street claiming you're his aunty.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:00, Reply)

Swansea FTW! Accost away, I don't mind. I'll probably be drunk.
Honestly, I've only ever seen one Star Wars film, and I watched that on Sunday. I kind of just agreed with him a lot about whatever he said. Then we talked about Spongebob. I was on much safer territory there.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:03, Reply)

Hopefully you started with A New Hope..
I know what you look like from your profile so will looking for you on the mean streets of Swansea if I do end up going down *evil grin*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:06, Reply)

I've seen the Return of the Jedi too.
Was never much taken up with them though, to be honest. Glad I'm not alone!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:08, Reply)

A New Hope. It was on on ITV on Sunday so Mr VP sat me down with some cheese and biscuits and instructed me to watch and learn.
I got quite into it actually, I'll hopefully watch the next one this week.
Sam - I'll be with a girl who looks like a skinny version of me. And Mr VP, who is either super beardy, or resembles a tennis ball, depending on his shave cycle. I do believe I've been instructed to shave it all off tonight so he'll prob be in tennis ball mode.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:10, Reply)

How did I miss it?
(not that it matters, I have them all on DVD and I hate the remasters anyway)
I'll look out for Aunty Lucy, Aunty Lucy lookalike and a tennis ball then. Should be fairly easy to spot!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:13, Reply)

At about 6 it was on. The family film or summat.
We'll stick out like sore thumbs anyway as we're all West Country folk, and you can definitely hear it in our accents!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:16, Reply)

Would it not have been better to watch it on DVD?
There is hardly a man alive between 25 and 50 who doesn't own them.
Borrow it.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:20, Reply)

And make sure it's the special edition 2 disc one with the original version on!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:21, Reply)

I probably will do. Mr VP owns them on video so that's no use. I only watched it because I was given food and a comfy seat and told to watch it.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:22, Reply)

that Lucas ensured that they put the worst possible transfer of the originals to prove that he was right.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:22, Reply)

It makes you hardly a man :)
I have fond memories of all of those films, I own them in multiple versions, but I don't actually like them!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:24, Reply)

has said that we have multiple copies and would you like to borrow them.
*edit* or get the DVDs for Mr LvP for Christmas.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:25, Reply)

It's not the transfers I object to, it's all the added CGI and extra scenes. Like Jabba in the spaceport early on in A New Hope, when they first meet Hans Solo. It's not right!
Lucy - any idea which versions? Quite a lot of the VHS are post-1997 remaster as well, from memory they have bigger gold writing on the cases, there was a box set that came out as well to 'celebrate' the remastering.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:25, Reply)

Yeah, me too, I realised about 2 years ago when I watched A New Hope that I had no interest in it whatsoever.
Sad really, I loved it so much growing up.
Edit: Oh, and afternoon all. I've been busy. Stupid job getting in the way of my B3ta time.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:25, Reply)

I have NO idea which versions. I normally stop listening to him when it comes to things like videos. Bless him, he can ramble a bit.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:26, Reply)

I have actually set up two TVs next to each other and run a copy on each, to spot ALL the differences in the remasters
*hangs head in shame*
I've got the remastered box set on VHS, and all the double disc special edition DVDs of the original trilogy, which contain both versions. I also have special edition DVDs of the new trilogy, even though I hate them all, especially the Phantom Menace.
I also have (extra geek points here) the holiday special which I downloaded, since they didn't ever sell it, and Caravan of Courage and the Battle for Endor on VHS which I need to copy to DVD. And a good proportion of the games. Cool eh?
Still haven't seen Clone Wars though, or the other animated stuff.
Edit: Woo, just found out I'm finishing at 4! Scotch and a joint in T-41 minutes...
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:30, Reply)

I've never liked them, even way back in 1977 when I was 8 and saw the first one in the Dominion Theatre.
It's just one big cliche, and the story had been done a million time before and since, in every genre you could think of!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:37, Reply)

the Holiday Special. Fuck that has to be the worst thing ever committed to film.
What I was meaning Sam is that the original versions on the DVD don't upscale and the film quality is very low. It's almost like Lucas was saying 'look how shit they are, now do you see why I had to bugger about with them'.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:37, Reply)

Blaming it for having been done a million times 'since' seems a bit harsh ;)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:38, Reply)

There was a whole slew of crap sci-fi films that can be traced back to those films, and every one of them has the same story!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:40, Reply)

Yeah, it's a bit stupid really, if they cleaned all the film for the remaster I don't see why they couldn't recut the original from that film for the DVD. It does look like a print that's been to a million cinemas rather than a master that's been kept under lock and key. But I'll put up with it because it's better anyway!
Holiday special is hideous, granted, but I'm a bit of a completist. It's still better than The Phantom Menace...!
Dok - I'd contend that it was original in a lot of ways - one of the first if not the first sci fi (although I'd even argue with this, I don't strictly think it's a sci fi) films to achieve mainstream box office popularity.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:42, Reply)

I'm off to get lost in Baths horrible traffic system. yukkity.
See you all later!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:42, Reply)

My bath doesn't have traffic.
It just has taps and a drain.
/poor
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:44, Reply)

OK it was one of the first 'mainstream' sci-fi movies, but that doesn't make it good. It just hit the screens at the right time that's all. People wanted change, and that's what it was.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:47, Reply)

Star Wars - New Hope is the typical Grail Quest story In my opinion.
And anyways Lucas wanted to create a modern myth. The old Wild West films had given children of the 50s a mythology. He wanted to do the same again.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:51, Reply)

So there.
'Noon all, I appear to be busy today. Again. This job is turning out to be very disappointing. How are you all?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:51, Reply)

How right you are, Star Wars was just a western in space.
I'll come down of my high horse now.
Hi Wookie, I'm all good today thanks, you?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:52, Reply)

It's definitely more of a Western than a sci fi, as I alluded to earlier.
Don't see how this is a bad thing though..
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:53, Reply)

*stabs ears*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:56, Reply)

Don't deafen yourself, it's not that bad you're away from it now!
*hugs*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:58, Reply)

It makes me want to go amok in a town centre with an AK-47 and 10 extra clips.
2 minutes til home, and I've realised that all I've done today is scan a one page document. Which someone else placed in the auto feeder for me, so I didn't even have to get up and go to the scanner. Win!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:58, Reply)

Kaol, keep 'em coming! My favourite kind of dismembered-bunny-demon is the on fire kind.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 15:59, Reply)

That is epic fail! You killed the thread!
EDIT Kaol go there first.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:16, Reply)

It was Mrs Bin.
It's getting dark and I'm bored. What shall we talk about?
Kaol, ask us something interesting.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:18, Reply)

and I was writing a little thread-killer song for you all.
*saves in Word for next time*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:19, Reply)

I'm going to be in the car with my mate for 12 hours tomorrow.
Can anyone think of a good prank to play on him?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:23, Reply)

And unfortunately it's a a horrendous one.
I'll be drinking and cursing a lot over the next month!
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:24, Reply)

Claim you just hit someone. Get out and look for the someone. If you look panicky and shaky enough, he'll think either a) you did hit someone or b) that you really believe you did.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:27, Reply)

You could pretend that you don't know how to read a map, and have to rely on Satnav like a Polish lorry driver, so you get stuck in a narrow road...
oh, wait...
;)
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:28, Reply)

Hunt you down, hand-cuff you to the rear door-handle, and drag you to Cumbria :p
*grins*
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:30, Reply)

Some cases get me more than others, but I can switch off. I cope by thinking that if I see nasty stuff in a case, I then have to ascertain how they got there, and then put together as watertight case as I can.
I can tell this recent one's going to be tough, but I'll cope.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:35, Reply)

I'm off at 5:10...
And then I'm off to Cumbria again tomorrow.
So I'll be gone 'til Sunday night.
Hope you don't miss me too much :p
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 16:45, Reply)

*wanders around kicking thing*
*writes rudery on the walls*
Doesn't anyone do a full day's work anymore?
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 17:04, Reply)

you don't count. You actually do work all day and therefore don't post very much anyway.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 17:09, Reply)

Well, I'm off to do something else then. But I've started a new evening thread too, so do drop in.
( , Thu 20 Nov 2008, 17:33, Reply)
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