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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Day Thread

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 7:37, 228 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Morning!
I was wondering where everybody was, then I noticed the time...
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 7:48, Reply)
Morning :)
You've been starting early... hectic at work?
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 7:53, Reply)
Yep!
Plus I find getting in two hours before everyone else means I get more done, as there's less chatter to distract me.

How are you?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 7:54, Reply)
*Yawn*
Morning.

Damn Tescos and their "3 bottles for £10" offer. Had a couple of glasses from bottle #2 after finishing #1 and now I'm feeling the effects.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 7:56, Reply)
I wish cackers would hurry up and post.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 7:59, Reply)
G'morning Mike and Light
Only two more days of work to endure until the weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:02, Reply)
Morning Light!
I'm good thanks, quiet at work which gives me time for other things :)

Edit: mike, I think she's a merkin - ie hopefully fast asleep
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:04, Reply)
I'm going to sleep too then.
Her blog update will come quicker that way.

ONLY ONE MORE SLEEPS!
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:14, Reply)
She refers to herself in third person.
No3L is very amused by this.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:18, Reply)
Morning all
I like to get in earlyish too. That way I feel I can leave a little before 5pm. i couldn't be arsed working say 10 till 6.30.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:18, Reply)
Morning K2
That's my theory as well.

Did anyone else find Cackers' post quite a chore to read?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:23, Reply)
Cackers
I got half way through, got fed up and skimmed the rest. So yes, it was rather a chore. But it is of course a perfectly valid post and I didn't have to read it.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:25, Reply)
K2K6
A fair point!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:31, Reply)
Good day!
I finish work at 15:00 today (yay) so that I can make it to a routine hospital appointment (boo).
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:35, Reply)
Morning Captain :)
I've got (mandatory) counseling in a bit, but at least it means I can go for a walkbout.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:37, Reply)
I am having a long lunch break today
but it's because I've a funeral to go to. An old bloke that I knew died at the weekend, so I need to go and take advantage of a free piss up pay my last respects.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:42, Reply)
I'm going to a memorial service tomorrow
One of my long-time acquaintances died on New Year's Day. Sad, but... and I know this'll sound odd... it's probably for the best.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:44, Reply)
Wow... that did the trick eh? :)
Have this blatant pimp instead. I'm rather pleased with this one:

www.b3ta.com/questions/workboredom/post345917
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:51, Reply)
Yes, No3L
I had a wry chuckle when I saw that!
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:52, Reply)
Morning all...
I agree on some levels with the 'start early - finish early' theory, but I'm really not built for mornings.

Anyone know what's causing the stabbing pains about 2" below my sternum in the middle of my chest? I can't think of any vital organs that occupy that space. Fucking hurts though.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:58, Reply)
@Sam
Have you checked for knives?
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:59, Reply)
What a retarded dialogue box
http://i40.tinypic.com/2eanw3k.jpg

First analogy that comes to mind is being asked whether you'd like red or white wine and answering "yes please"

*sighs*
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:00, Reply)
Have you been impregnated by aliens?
Edit: sorry, Aliens?
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:02, Reply)

Aliens Bert

Morning all, you cum-soaked harem of cack
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:04, Reply)
Shit off, Bert!
Your flaccid reeking cock is not welcome here!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:05, Reply)
Mr Majora
I put it to you that you love my flaccid, reeking cock. So much, in fact, that you regularly pleasure yourself with a pickled foetus, just to simulate the effect that it has on you.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:07, Reply)
Not knives, fairly sure it's not aliens either
Hmm... might have to go and see a quack. I'll give it a week first to see if it clears up or I die though, I hate going near a doctor unless I am actually dying.

@ V - never seen that before, what does it mean? And why's it an IE dialogue box?

I like the way Captain V has a V:\ drive!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:08, Reply)
Morning all
I'm feeling quite chipper this morning despite the annoying headache at my temples!

So how are you lot?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:13, Reply)
Sam
I haven't a fucking clue what it means or why it's an IE dialogue box. I've never had it before. It'll be interesting to see if I get the same message when moving files in other directories.

I'd never thought about the V drive before. If I ever run windows on a personal machine again I think I'll have to have a V:\ drive of some sort.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:14, Reply)
Well, Bert, allow me to retort
That pickled foetus is a better lover than you'll ever be! For a start, it lasts longer than your record of 14 seconds, plus it doesn't cry every time I am a bit forceful with my manipulations.

Let us also not forget that that dear foetus (which you conveniently forget is named 'The Intestinator') gapes my ravaged hole far better than your trouser-tapeworm.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:15, Reply)
Mmmmmm pickles
*does not even like pickles*
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:18, Reply)
Trouser tapeworm?
It's not my fault that your cavernous hole has been so regularly pummeled that it now resembles the flaps of an open tent in a force ten hurricane.

Nobody else has ever complained about my introduction of GIGANTACOCK to their rectum, so it is your problem, not mine.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:23, Reply)
Nings kids
I'm on reception AGAIN today, so no nursing at all this week. Fucked off now.
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:23, Reply)
Morning you bunch of goat fuckers.
I'm feeling all lazy today.
I need someone to come and motivate me. Hard.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:28, Reply)
*introduces GIGANTACOCK to becky's rectum*

(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:29, Reply)
I'll motivate you from here to next Tuesday
if you give me half a chance Lusty...*wobbles and gurns a bit*

Edit: Laughs at the punyness of Gigantacock
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:29, Reply)
Gigantacock
The state of my slack ringpiece notwithstanding, your clit-o-penis is so unsatisfactory that even your attempts at nasal and aural sex left me with plenty of room for rent.

Edit: Hello Lusty and Becky!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:30, Reply)
Lusty...
I'd motivate you so hard you'd forget your own name.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:31, Reply)
*gasps*
Becky! Don't be so horrid, GIGANATCOCK is especially sensitive to those who have seen him first hand.

Lab, you could move a family of polish immigrants into your filth-smeared stench hole. In fact, I think we ought to check it now for cockle pickers.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:34, Reply)
Aural sex
Best.phrase.ever
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:35, Reply)
Labia, when did you become part of my rectum?
I was unaware of such flora and fauna hiding down there until now!

Question for you all...If you suspected there was a gas leak, would you not think you'd smell gas? Carbon monoxide poisoning aside...

Edit: Well that'd be everyone then Bert, as we've all been privy to Gigantacock
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:35, Reply)
Bert
Maybe no one has NOTICED your cock in their rectum?
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:35, Reply)
Gas leak?
Yeah. They put a special chemical smell into mains gas, for exactly that reason.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:36, Reply)
Actually
I've never bummed anyone, I get about an inch in and my brain goes 'OHMYFECKINGGODEEEURGHTHISISWHEREHERPOOSCOMESFROMI'MGOINGTOHEAVEBLEEURGH'
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:38, Reply)
Yeah come on then Kaol.
Motivate me.

I'll let Becky watch. With all that wobbling and gurning I'm worried she might pass out if she got too involved.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:40, Reply)
I imagine Kaol would be
very frowny during sex
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:41, Reply)
Well Burt,
To be fair, you wouldn't know, what with biting the pillow and all...
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:41, Reply)
So not just me then
I went to my mum's place last night and one of the old ladies she looks after called complaining of a gas leak as her breathing was not good. We amble over and there's no smell of gas, the gas man turns up...no smell of gas, the rapid response unit turns up...no smell of gas, the carer turns up...no smell of gas, the ambulance turns up...no smell of gas. Frankly I think she just wanted the attention.

Edit: Agrees that Bert would definitely be the girl with Kaol
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:41, Reply)
Bert
An immigrant family would be welcome in my cavernous cackchute, they're hard working and always grateful, compared to your pathetic attempts at 'making love'. Plus rollmopps give me the raging horn.

I tried, I really did, to make the best of your nethernipple and your epileptic flailings, but you can't polish a stinking 12-pint-and-kebab turd.

Which, incidentally, is your masturbation technique.

Edit: Becky, I moved in last week, as the rent's cheaper than my old place, and i've always wanted to be a kangaroo joey.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:42, Reply)
An epic fail!
My 1st attempt at moving the HSH thread www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post345910 proved to be an epic failure.

The lyrics were of course 'Home Sweet Home' by Motley Crue.

I'm tootling off for a little cry now.
(I helped save b3ta! SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:44, Reply)
There was
a gas leak out in the road about a week ago.

I had to call out the gas emergency services, who went round with a stick that made funny noises.

Turns out if someone had lit a cigarette out there then there would have been a pretty big explosion. Awesome.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:45, Reply)
It was too subtle
And too difficult to google for.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:46, Reply)
Morning Vadges
I am feeling spritely today.

Yeys.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:46, Reply)
Jim,
That's why I carry a lit cigarette with me at all times.
Just in case.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:47, Reply)
Ugh
Not so much hung over as stayed up far too late. Good job I don't have any meetings today as I doubt I'd be able to stay awake.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:49, Reply)
Back soon
I have to head off now, back in an hour or so!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:49, Reply)
According the gas bloke
although it's unwise to toddle past with a lit cigarette, they don't actually ignite the gas very easily. Naked flames do the trick quite well.

You carry lighters on every part of your body, so there'd be no problem there.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:49, Reply)
Yeah...
I need to create some kind of "flame-suit".
Although lugging a propane tank around on my back could be awkward.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:53, Reply)
Becky
It doesn't matter who I'm with, I'm always the girl. Because I have an incredibly tight ringpiece, and a penchant for penis.

Lab, there is nothing wrong with my attempts at making love to you, it's just that it would take an army of grit-covered Sumo wrestlers carrying killers whales to satisfy your mighty gorge.

My masturbation technique is legendary among scatological forums, two girls and one cup mean nothing when compared to my faeces ridden rummages, there are certain cast members of Hollyoaks who would pay top dollar to see a bit of my shitwanking.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:53, Reply)
I need more coffee!
I'm all distracted today, my concentration has turned into that of a gnat!

Help me Obi Wan KeB3ta. You're my only hope!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:53, Reply)
Don't worry
Herr Doktor, I am also completely uninterested in my work for some reason.

Roll your wheely chair over your toes to jump start yourself back into the real world.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:01, Reply)
Morning all
I see we're already doing bottom humour.

Par for the course really.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:02, Reply)
Everybody's being mean to me today, PJ
Defend my honour.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:03, Reply)
@Bert
Honour?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:06, Reply)
Alright, not honour
defend my pus-filled penis and my vice-like bumhole
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:09, Reply)
Why did you lot not want a normal thread structure?
This is impossible to follow.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:09, Reply)
It's like a blind cobbler's thumb
There. Does that cover it?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:09, Reply)
I wanted the other thread structure.
But everyone moaned.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:11, Reply)
I much prefer flat view forums/message boards
It saves having to look in different trees halfway up the page constantly.

It's not 1995 any more, get with the times!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:12, Reply)
The only problem with the branched structure
Is that more scrolling is involved.
*shrugs*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:15, Reply)
Sam I think this very much an outdated structure
the threaded type makes much more sense.

Also it's one step away from having avatars and stupidly huge signatures.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:15, Reply)
Morning B3tans!
I am mostly cringing today. I have found some poetry that I was writing back in 2005 during a pretty bleak time.

I was convinced that I was a good writer. Now I think not so much. Of 20-odd poems, there's only one that I like.

Still, it was cathartic, I s'pose. We all well?
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:18, Reply)
I like the flat view.
It keeps the mind active remembering which posts go with which converstions, especially when you're replying in more than one convo!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:18, Reply)
I want someone to tell me how to use the
Staggered replies in this format.
I'm looking at you, Burt.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:20, Reply)
I prefer the nested replies the other boards have
but what Kaol said originally.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:21, Reply)
Agrees /talk style replies are annoying
Didn't I tell you that you were my bitch about a year ago Bert? Still denying it?

Yeah the gas man did the wandering about with a pokey stick thing too. And then insisted on explaining exactly how it worked. Which was fun.
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:22, Reply)
I'll happily be your bitch, becks
I imagine you'd do all sorts of lovely things to me, like Rats in my pants and dead cats in my soup.

I'll gaz you in a sec, Kaol
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:24, Reply)
My main gripe with /talk style replies
Is that it gets a bit messy when a thread gets long and the constant scrolling to look for new replies would piss me off when I'm trying to work. The time spent to replies read ratio is too high.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:27, Reply)
I see Burt is sexing again today.
Is there ever a day when he doesn't have his throbbing member in someone's orifice?


I prefer this type of thread. It's more communal, a sort of big hippy love-in type of thread.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:27, Reply)
Woohoo I has a Bertbitch :)
Now to think up some tasks for you to perform for me...
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:27, Reply)
V I have to agree
It just takes too long to find the responces when the thread gets too long, and sometimes this thread gets huge!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:29, Reply)
I must say,
it can be easier to work out who's talking to who with the nested replies...

But I sense I am in the minority with this one!

Oh, and *smooshes*, obviously.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:30, Reply)
Threads...
Was a film about Sheffield being nuked.

Seriously, I can't be dealing with the /talk way of doing it. It's all haphazard and hard to see who wrote what and when for me.

I'm a simple chap, me.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:30, Reply)
BGB
It's always a good day when bert's in your orifice.
Don't be such a hippie though, I like the Off Topic replies because I can get lost on /talk, it's got nothing to do with communism.

Mistress Becks, what would you like first? Foot massage, or anal douching?
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:30, Reply)
PJM, yes Threads
was a film about Sheffield being nuked!

One of the best hings that could happen to it if you ask me.

Hi BGB I didn't see you sneak in.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:31, Reply)
I suppose this format works for HSH threads
cos they get to hundreds of replies.

It'd be quite handy in the other threads in OT though.

Also - works in board and talk - there's a setting in your profile settings which highlights your posts and new posts since your last refresh.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:32, Reply)
@Her Dok.
*is sneaky*

@Bert - I thought you'd like the idea of a big B3ta hippy love-in.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:33, Reply)
*smooshes DiT*
and licks for good measure

I think my first act of mistresshood of the monkey would be to demand that you bring me some breakfast as I didn't have time to grab some on the way here this morning. Also a foot massage as my feet are cold, using the finest massage oils known to monkeykind.
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:40, Reply)
@BGB
What happens if you haven't got big hips?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:40, Reply)
@No3l
That's a pretty awesome feature but it doesn't negate the need for the huge amounts of scrolling that'd be required.

I suppose if things here were completely formatted like /talk (ie replies always visible from the parent OT) then it'd be better than the last implementation here as having multiple main threads rather than one giant one would work much more effectively.

Tbh though I'm not hugely bothered either way. If it changed we'd soon get used to it if we had to.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:42, Reply)
You retard, Kaol
You forgot to press return after putting the number in, didn't you?

Becks, I'd gladly get you some breakfast, I skipped mine too.
How do bacon rolls with tons of brown sauce sound?
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:45, Reply)
Yeah...
I did :(
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:46, Reply)
I don't have that option
maybe my firefox is out of date.

Edit: Brown sauce is evil and wrong. Ketchup would go down nicely though :)
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:45, Reply)
*eyes becky's firefox*
Looks alright to me, have you tried canesten?

Ketchup is a villainous death sauce from hell, our entire deal is off.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:46, Reply)
@PJM.
I'm sure you've got something big on your person that qualifies ; )


@Captain V - I would never get used to it and so would be banished to the nether regions of the tinternet ......... Facebook! *shudders*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:47, Reply)
Yeah, didn't agree with me though
tasted a bit funny.

Edit: Oh well, you were a shit bitch for me anyway...goes hunting for more hebitches.
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:47, Reply)
Shitbitch?
I'm sure you're thinking of somebody else.

I'm the finest bitch in all the land. I was Dudley Moore's gimp for seven years.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:51, Reply)
Becky
I'll be your bitch.

Or are you too orangey for crows?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:53, Reply)
Yay a new one...
Only Kia ora's too orangey for crows, everyone knows that :)

yes you were Bert. I asked for food AND a foot massage...what happened to the massage of greatness? Ergo, shitbitch
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:59, Reply)
Hahahaha
I very nearly replied in the same vein Bert.

Isn't Beckyconsonants a tad too young to remember those ads?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:59, Reply)
I remember those ads
And I'm a tiny bit younger than Beckyconsonants.

*runs off to get bacon sarnies, ketchup, pumice stone and oils*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:02, Reply)
Good Lord
Sexy coworker is wearing some sort of over-the-blouse corset thing today which is making her always impressive funbags even more epic. Also either she's feeling a bit chilly or her bra has corners. Combined with my lack of sleep and mild hangover it's giving me the raging horn.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:03, Reply)
PJM
She's older than I am, and I remember the Kia Ora advert, it was the shiznit.

I'll give my massages and bacon rolls to somebody else then. Ner.

Lightinchains You dirty bastard. Go and touch her up, I promise you that she'll love it.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:03, Reply)
I remember those adverts
And I'm pretty sure that I'm younger than most of you here this fine morning.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:03, Reply)
Fine, they smell of wee anyway
And yes I am officially old PJM

Edit for awesomeness:
uk.youtube.com/watch?v=5LvLn9PWln8
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:05, Reply)
Lights
Sounds fun! I'm in a room full of men, making you the winner.

Oh, Becky, I got you a professional foot masseuse as well, as I'm obviously not worthy enough to touch your feet.

*hands over the sarnies*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:06, Reply)
The big 3-0h
I'm three years off that one at the moment, but I was born old, and having kids ages you rapidly.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:07, Reply)
Mr. Chains
I hate it when that happens.
Well, kinda love it too.

I've officially broken-in the trainee today.
She's now my bitch. I don't have to take health and safety memos around the factory, as she does it for me.
And she makes me coffee.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:08, Reply)
@Bert.
For some reason I always picture you as a 17 year old. I wonder why that is?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:08, Reply)
Nicely done Kaol
Cheers Labia, I'll call on you when I require more stuff done :) *cough* I mean that's better bitch

Edit: Watch and learn Bert, watch and learn
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:10, Reply)
So effectively Kaol
You have an assistant? Awesome. I wish I had an assistant.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:10, Reply)
Kaol
Your last post got more disappointing as it went on.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:10, Reply)
Yeah, I know...
Welcome to my world V.
Things start with so much promise, and end in bitter, crushing disappointment.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:12, Reply)
You're right
I'd be very disappointed with a coffee made by crushing some beans. Mind you I'd be disappointed with any kind of coffee.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:13, Reply)
Office minions
I've never come across (fnarr fnarr) the kind of office minions you see in 'Secretary', or indeed in numerous office porn films.

I obviously lead an empty life. Bono should write a song about my deprivation.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:16, Reply)
See, trainee girl is hot,
But she's a massive fan of Rod Stewart.
So it kinda cancels out.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:18, Reply)
Do you think she's sexy, do you want her body?
Come on baby let her knoooo-ooow!
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:21, Reply)
Hmmm...
That might just work...
*laughs*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:22, Reply)
Kaol
Play her the Revolting Cocks version of that song, it's much better.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:23, Reply)
@Labia
A secretary in an old workplace was pretty enough, but as much use as a pair of chocolate trousers. She "didn't do" filing, fucked off with the post at 4:30 and rolled in hung over and ten minutes late every morning.

She's managing a team in the healthcare sector now.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:23, Reply)
@Kaol
Play her this and see if she gets it:
uk.youtube.com/watch?v=IVfgnD-2XjM

/old git mode
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:25, Reply)
Office Minions
I love them, I just want some of them!

Good golly I feel very odd right now.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:25, Reply)
PJM
Our sister company had a hot temporary secretary in once, and she was completely useless as well. She only lasted two weeks, and was let go due to her habit of taking the minutes of meetings using a pink highlighter pen, and then sending scanned copies to the people involved.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:28, Reply)
Kaol...
But does she have 'hot legs'? ;P

I remember the Kia Ora adverts - not only that, but my friends Uncle is the man who did the animation for the Crows. When I found that out I was so impressed...
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:30, Reply)
Chocolate trousers
could be useful if you had them licked off you by some hot nymphomaniac...
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:31, Reply)
A question for you old, experienced people
Any of you ever tried that thing where you record notes, and then play them to yourself while you sleep?

If so, does it actually work?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:32, Reply)
k2k6
How about it, stud? ;)
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:32, Reply)
Kaol
You're not going on about that trainee again?
FFS, sort it out.
(Flid James carry on, mongs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:33, Reply)
PoD
Do you mean subconcious learning (it involves a similar process, because if you do, nope never tried that.

I have thought about it, much the same way as I've though about self hypnosis and auto suggestion.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:35, Reply)
Shut up Pudding!
*frowns*

I've gotta go to the shipping container that I got shut in before :|
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:36, Reply)
@Ethel
Let me rephrase...

...licked off by a hot female nymphomaniac.

Although, seeing as nymphomaniac are female by definition, I shouldn't really have to add that in!

@PoD - no, I haven't tried it. But I think the only way it would work is if it kept you awake.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:36, Reply)
@Kaol
I'm sure she'll fall for your charms... IIRC didn't Brixton Bruxelles mate take a shine to you at a bash a while back?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:37, Reply)
Aah, the abuse.
You know I'm fucking right, you pussy.
Take her to the container and take her in the container.
(Flid James carry on, mongs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:38, Reply)
Maybe...
I don't really remember, I was rather drunk... :p
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:38, Reply)
Hahaha
She was alright in a kind of a not very tall blonde rock chick sort of a way.

So tell us all about this trainee then...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:40, Reply)
I would also
like to hear about this trainee.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:45, Reply)
Tbh Kaol
Pics or she doesn't exist.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:48, Reply)
Yes Kaol
Tell us of this trainee!

I hardly got a chance to chat to Brixton at the bash, and I really wanted to.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:49, Reply)
What they all said ^
Go for it Kaol...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:49, Reply)
Are you guys talking about the horse and groom?
Cause if you are I remember even less of that bash than I thought I did.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:52, Reply)
@Dok
Brix was lovely, a very funny and very nice lady indeed.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:53, Reply)
Oh bloody hell!
It's not like I'm fucking her in the stock-cupboard.
Or anywhere else, for that matter.

I just happen to have a trainee in my office who's pretty hot, it's not like I'm plotting my way into her nude company.

*sighs*

EDIT: V, that was a Yorkshire Grey bash.
PJM, I remember her now! She was nice, but she was 18.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:56, Reply)
PJM
Yeah from what I did see she did seem so, I just wish I could have chatted more.

V nope it was the first time at the Yorkshire Grey.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:57, Reply)
Ooooohhhhh!
Kaol's blushing!

Hehehe.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 11:58, Reply)
Yeah...
I wish :p
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:00, Reply)
He's only not fucking her because she's still alive.
He's fussy like that.
(Flid James carry on, mongs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:02, Reply)
@Kaol
Yeah, she was quite young... At the risk of invoking bad taste, she was legal.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:05, Reply)
Aaaaarrrgghhhhhh!
Stuck in boring crap meetings. And now there are a gillion kids running around in the park, so I'm delaying my smoke until they've fecked off.

Nings to all.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:06, Reply)
Yeah...
To be fair, 18 to me is only 4 years (Well, five now).
Whereas 18 to you is... Like half your age or something :p

G'afternoon Clendrix!
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:08, Reply)
@Clendrix
They've probably got a spare smoke between them...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:08, Reply)
Nings Clenders!
How many is a gillion? Is it more or less than seventeen?
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:08, Reply)
@Kaol
Yeah... I'm sixteen years her senior.

Technically I could be her father.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:09, Reply)
Tightly
for some reason that question sounded vaguely paedophilic.

More. Many many more. But they're getting ready to go now.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:10, Reply)
Guys
I'm sure she's older than 18, to be honest I think I read in one of her posts that she'sin her 30's.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:13, Reply)
Oh...
I was kinda joking, but there you go!
EDIT: Dok, we're talking about her friend, not her!
Hmmm... This is getting creepy.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:13, Reply)
Herr Dok
Ah - Brix is in her 30s but doesn't look it.

Brix's mate (the vertically challenged blonde lass) was/is 18.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:15, Reply)
Sorry
I missed the point that the conversation changed to her friend.

And yes she does not look in her 30's in the least!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:18, Reply)
No!
I wouldn't drunkenly flirt with b3ta folk!
What do you take me for? Some kind of internet-based-weirdo?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:22, Reply)
ENOUGH!
Discussing which b3tans (and friends of b3tans) you'd do is very naughty, especially when said b3tans are not here. And discussing their ages? Shame. Shame on you all.
Edit: Kaol is a liar :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:23, Reply)
I am not!
I'm a polite and well-behaved young man.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:24, Reply)
Drixy
Yes Kaol is a nice man who would never do something like that ;)
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:26, Reply)
@Clendrix
I'm not discussing which b3tans I'd do. Merely pointing out that a pal of a b3tan took an interest in Kaol.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:28, Reply)
Ha!
*searches memory*
*grins*
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:28, Reply)
@Clendrix
You were there of course...

A great evening. I never did thank Lusty enough for her lovely cakes.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:29, Reply)
I'd never discuss which b3tans I'd 'do'
I'm the perfect gentleman.

*tips hat to the womenfolk*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:30, Reply)
PJM
My memory search brought up another night entirely.
It was a good'un.

And now I'm going out for a smoke :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:31, Reply)
I agree,
I most certainly would not discuss "which b3tans I'd do".
That's just not my style.

I just realised that I've been awake for 29 hours.
*sighs*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:32, Reply)
I know. I was just teasing.
You're all good boys, really.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:33, Reply)
@Kaol
What about non-b3tans?

Why 29 hours???? Get your fancy woman trainee to make coffee pronto!
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:33, Reply)
B3tans You'd 'Do'
It's not something I've given any though to being honest! If I had, I most certainly not discuss it in one of the threads.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:34, Reply)
I have no problems talking about which b3tans I'd do.
Number one on the list is Clendrix.
Well, she's the only on the list really.
She'd get it hard.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:35, Reply)
*comforts Kaol*
I know that I would discuss which b3tans I'd "do" but only face to face in their presence. By discuss I really mean randomly saying "I'd give you a good seeing to" rather than saying yay or nay in turn to everybody in my presence. That'd be rude.

Not that I've done that, that I remember, but such things are said to my non-b3tan friends and as b3tans are real people too so I'll treat them as such!

Captain V - taking honesty and openness to the extreme since 1987
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:36, Reply)
Ooh my suggestion for QOTW :)
What Level does that make me, Kaol? :p
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:42, Reply)
Hmmm...
Mister Thirty-One...
Have you had a best of?
Have you won a QOTW?
I'm guessing no...
So Level Three.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:44, Reply)
I would 'do' all of you.
Of course, when I say 'do', I mean 'drink beer with'. I'm a taken Devil! ;)

Grats, No3l. But let's not get in to this levels things again, eh? It's confusing.

EDIT: Thanks for the reminder, big man!
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:47, Reply)
Which B3tans I'd do?
Every single one of you.

I'm not fussy.


I see the thread went all macho for a while. 18 year old secretaries seem to be popular around here.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:47, Reply)
At least that's an improvement :)

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:48, Reply)
Lusty...
up against the wall of The Cock?
You're on!
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:51, Reply)
Er...
29 (nearly 30) hours awake...
I didn't sleep last night.
Problem is that the night before I had two hours sleep.
So I'm really not firing on all pistons today.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:55, Reply)
Oh!
I did get on the Best Of page once :)
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:56, Reply)
@Clendrix
It sounds like a perfect night out to me.

*anticipates*
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:56, Reply)
*jumps in*

Hey ho, yet another second fucking place on the qotw to add to my collection.

*sulks*

I'm off to get drunk.
(I helped save b3ta! Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:56, Reply)
Poof,
I've not had a "Best Of" since everyone started posting on Off Topic, rather than clicking my posts...
*sighs*

31, call it Grade 2 then.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:59, Reply)
@Pooflake.
You'll always be a low achiever.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:59, Reply)
Second?
What? There's a conspiracy going on here...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 12:59, Reply)
@Kaol...

I know what you mean...but I've got nothing left in the tank.
(I helped save b3ta! Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:02, Reply)
I got a respectable fourth
for a picture. Curious.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:02, Reply)
I'm just waiting for a "good question"
*sighs*

I'll keep telling myself that.
I'm not washed up.
Not yet, it's too soon :(

Oh, lunchtime!
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:04, Reply)
I thought today was going to be a good day...
I had my yearly appraisal today and incredibly, it went quite well.

But then I got the boring inevitable second place.

Perhaps I should devote my time to doing my job instead of hanging about on here...

Edit: If /all was back, at least then I'd not get my hopes up...then again, they wouldn't be able to rig the voting would they?

was that out loud?
(I helped save b3ta! Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:05, Reply)
If you got a good appraisal,
I reckon you can afford to spend longer on here...

Anyway, I need a serious dose of coffee or my heart is gonna stop.
*waves*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:06, Reply)
@Pooflake.
Still, it's nice to have something to aim for. What will you do when you hit first place? What then?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:07, Reply)
New QotW
I don't have anything for this week's QotW, so I might have to make something up instead, or post a pic of kittens.

Edit: Seems my post last week was my personal best! Woo!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:09, Reply)
I have once...only once...

and I spluffed with joy
(I helped save b3ta! Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:09, Reply)
I got second place once
for a post that isn't all that representative of how I really am. The one's i've written that I've enjoyed writing didn't figure anywhere.

18 year old workerbots...sure why not

Who I'd do from b3ta...a lady never tells

Hot melty fudge or creamy sticky toffee?
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:15, Reply)
@Becky
Depends who it's drizzled over.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:18, Reply)
Becky, you asking me?
Hot melty fudge :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:18, Reply)
QOTW
I've never had a question adopted despite attempting to be Freddy Woo.

That's my next goal.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:18, Reply)
Fudge please!
I've got onto the Best Of pages a couple of times, but never the lofty heights of the top 5.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:21, Reply)
@PJM...

I've had a question suggestion used too...

but just the once...

Newsletter a few times...

And collectively (not always under the name Pooflake) I am just under the 100 mark for the 'Best Of' page

But just one win.

I think it's possibly because the same 10 or so lovely people click my posts each week, which qualifies it for second but never pushes it to the top.

Time to re-invent methinks.
(I helped save b3ta! Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:24, Reply)
Freddy who?

(Freddy Woo suggesting your questions since, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:26, Reply)
@Pooflake.
Speaking for myself. I only click your post if it amuses me, and it usually does.

I'm very discerning with my clicks.


Edit - Ooo! I got a qotw suggestion chosen a few weeks ago but the exitement was short lived. It's a big hit and a quick comedown.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:26, Reply)
BGB - you've clicked loads!
I'm VERY discerning considering how long I've been here :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:34, Reply)
@BGB
Reading on my mobile, the font made it look like you are quite discerning with your dicks.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:35, Reply)
I'm a whore
I click a lot of qotw answers too.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain V, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:36, Reply)
I'm quite picky
I try not to let who posted affect my judgement, but the regulars usually know how to tell a story well so tend to get clicked more often.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:48, Reply)
@Light in chains.
Erm.....I guess that would be true also.

@Clendrix - maybe I'm just easily pleased.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:49, Reply)
BGB
Then you're a lucky girl :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:52, Reply)
I must admit
I don't post very often in QOTW, but I also don't just click for clicky's sake, the story has to be good.

And Guys the best I've ever had with a story was tenth, it was my first QOTW post by the way!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:57, Reply)
I've had a first
And quite a few "best of" posts.
Newsletter once.
Two questions chosen.

So, yeah, I'm great, what can I say.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:00, Reply)
Afternoon
you bunch of fuckers. How is everyone?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:03, Reply)
Al you old goat fucker
I'm meh!

How're you?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:04, Reply)
I'm full of cheese and watching neighbours.

Libby Kennedy still gives me the horn after all these years.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:06, Reply)
Cheese and Neighbours you say!
Should you not be at work like the rest of us!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:09, Reply)
The benefit of
working in the other office is that I can go to my parents for lunch.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:11, Reply)
You
Lucky bugger Al!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:12, Reply)
You say that
but you've never met my parents.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:13, Reply)
Amateurs
I've clicked a grand total of 34 QOTW answers.

God I'm a miser.

(Would have been 35 but once I said 'click' to a post and then forgot to actually do so)
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:14, Reply)
Right you cunts
i'm off to work again. I hope you all catch nasty diseases that make your genitals smell of cod.

*distributes big kisses*
(Bazongaloid, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:16, Reply)
Hi Scarpe
Long time no see!

How's tricks, and the stopping smoking?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:17, Reply)
Hey Dok
Yeah, still not smoking.

Work has been insane, so I haven't had the time to just lurk and post here since New Year.

Hopefully it will ease up soon.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:18, Reply)
Excellent on the not smoking!
Bad about the work, but at least you're doing something!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:21, Reply)
Just returned from a funeral
and I see mention of Libby Kennedy from Neighbours.

*gets serious horn*
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:34, Reply)
Hello!
I hate advertising this, but I so rarely post stories these days, I couldn't resist!

I'm sorry!

Libby Valentine? Phwoar!

EDIT: He's a thread... KILLER!
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:39, Reply)
For fuck's cunting sake!

My post made the best page - albeit in last place.

Then it didn't.

It's been removed.

WTF?
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:58, Reply)
Ok I admit it.
I've been clicking like a demented ocd sufferer.

But what can I say.....they're funny or poignant.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 15:08, Reply)
Heh
No post in here for an hour?!

Is everyone gazzing Bert? :)
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 16:06, Reply)
That's odd, Twisty.
Write and complain!
*goads*

Everyone's fucked off now that I'm back with time to play. Balls.
I'm off to play with Bert.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 16:23, Reply)
I've started an evening thread...
for I am hopeless and helpless and rather sad.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 17:33, Reply)

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