I ate a prawn!
I ate a prawn.
I said I'd eat a prawn in the 2K10 y'all, and I ate a damn prawn.
This wasn't an accidental 'oh-god-this-has-a-prawn-in-I-shall-just-neck-it-like-a-pill-and-hope-I-don't-notice'.
This was a prawn. In a restaurant.
The texture is in some ways more bearable than I recall and in others it's more odd.
I'd still rather not, but I said that about olives, so who knows.

I ate a prawn.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 7:46, 157 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Well done you.
I was very disappointed with the taste of prawns. I'd been a long-time fan of Walker's Prawn Cocktail crisps since first school when some wag rubbed out some letters on the tuck shop blackboard and 'RAW COCK' was only 15p.
Edit: that's not the specific reason I liked the taste of the crisps.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:01, Reply)

I think raw cock is less of an affront to the senses, Noel.
I like prawn toast, because the prawn is mushed up.
I like Skips and the like, because they're just lully and powdery and puffy.
I don't like prawn cocktail crisps because they taste like under-cooked cock.

If you smoke a cigarette WHILST eating Walkers salt and vinegar crisps, they will taste like Walkers prawn cocktail crisps.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:06, Reply)

What does properly-cooked cock taste like?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:10, Reply)

Sausage.
Durrrr.

I feel a bit sick now.
Can we talk about olives?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:11, Reply)

Hated them as a kid, love them as an adult.
I don't expect that will happen with cauliflower, broccoli or sprouts.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:13, Reply)

It happened to me with broccoli
There's a boring tale involved.
Sprouts are becoming more bearable.
Always liked cauli.

MMMMM BROCCOLI.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:19, Reply)

I was a bit like that
with peas. I only used to eat them straight from the pod in my grandad's garden. But now I also like them cooked and on my plate!

Broccoli is nice, cauliflower is yum and sprouts are great.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:21, Reply)

I don't eat food that looks back at you with vacant eyes as you nom it.
It just ain't natural.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:14, Reply)

Oh god it didn't have its face or its horns!
I couldn't have done that.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:20, Reply)

That's alright then.
Still not really into prawns though.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:24, Reply)

Prawns are delicious
Olives, on the other hand, are minging. They have the most revolting taste.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:17, Reply)

I agree about olives
But after a while your brain gets tricked.
I doubt this will happen with prawns. They're full of tubes.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:21, Reply)

I've tried eating olives.
But each time I try, the less I like them and the more they give me the boke.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:22, Reply)

Start with the ones that are stuffed with pimento
then work up.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:25, Reply)

they'll be working up
their way back up his throat
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:05, Reply)

Woo! go girl.
What's next on your agenda of daring do?


I used to be quite a fussy eater until I became a vegetarian. Now there's not much I dislike.
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:38, Reply)

Except meat
presumably.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:40, Reply)

Obviously.

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:54, Reply)

A bit controversial maybe but,
Isn't being a veggie, just a little bit fussy?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:41, Reply)

I don't dislike the taste of meat.
I choose not to eat it.
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:56, Reply)

So therefore
you're being deliberately fussy! :-)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:57, Reply)

I know you know what I mean.
So I'm not going to bother argueing.
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:58, Reply)

Tee hee!

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:07, Reply)

Our impecible logic floored the mighty BGB
*high fives K2K6*
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:20, Reply)

Next I'm going to cook a whole roast chicken
And go on a really scary rollercoaster ride.
Not on the same day.

In other news,I have my cat back!! He must have exorcised his demons or something because he's just been cuddling me for two whole minutes.
He didn't smash anything up in the night and he hasn't beaten me up.
Yay!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:47, Reply)

So, from that statement
I assume you have never roasted a chicken? Its easy as fuck. Fire it in the oven for the specified time, open oven, take out, let sit for 10 mins then eat it with your hands, like a Viking.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:54, Reply)

Like a Viking?
Do you have to rape and pillage it first?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:57, Reply)

No problemo

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:01, Reply)

How long and on what gas mark do you do yours?
I live on my own so I've not really bothered cooking a whole chicken.
I go to my mum and dad's once a week and so I generally leave carcass-related stuff to them.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:58, Reply)

A whole chicken will last you a few days
in nibbles and sandwiches and salads. Fucking awesome. Or look up videos of how to bone and portion a chicken - I've done about twenty this past year and can do it in about four minutes now. Just freeze the bits you don't use straight away and boil the carcass with peppercorns and bay leaves for stock.
Edit: cooking times and temps are always printed on the packaging.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:01, Reply)

I'm sure me and the cat can make light work of it all in a few days.
I could make soup instead of stock and then freeze it too...
Yes. I'm going to do it next week.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:04, Reply)

If you don't eat the skin
the cat would dig it but it's pretty fatty. Also, you can freeze stock of course :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:05, Reply)

I recommend making soup
Home made chicken soup is the business.

Just make sure you do it the day before your bins are lifted though, otherwise the used carcass will likely be dragged out of your bin by a hungry fox/dog/cat/tramp.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:09, Reply)

Daughter and I made chicken noodle soup when it snowed
with home-made stock and chicken legs for the meat. I was AMAZED at how incredible it tasted and got my favourite compliment ever from my best friend about it.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:12, Reply)

I make a nice chicken gravy using legs that my mum gives me...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:13, Reply)

I haz wheelie bin

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:14, Reply)

Even wheelie bins
aren't fox-proof!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:15, Reply)

Well, I say good luck to them then!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:18, Reply)

Don't worry about the times
Your butcher will know (even a Tesco one) and the times can be found in all sorts of recipe books. Hell it's even probably on the packaging depending on where you buy it.

Most important thing once you get the time though is making sure the juices run clear when you skewer it. Have it for Sunday roast and then 50% of your lunch for work is sorted for the rest of the week in sandwiches and pastas.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Haha.
Oddly I meant pastas but wrote salads.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Noel!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:05, Reply)

Pah Salads!
Who eats them!?
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:07, Reply)

Iceberg lettuce, cherry tomatoes, cucumber
red onion, cubed mature cheddar, chicken, bacon, salt, pepper and a dressing of olive oil and light malt vinegar. Yum.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:10, Reply)

I'm going to get it from M&S

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:05, Reply)

Depends on the size of the chicken
It tells you on the packaging anyway, there is no guesswork at all. If you cook it then take all the meat off, you can put it in the fridge and it will last a few days. I love cooked chicken in a curry, it goes all stringy and lovely, or on a buttered roll with a sprinkling of salt or even in a cheeky Ceasar salad.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:05, Reply)

Ohh the salt is a must. Myommymnymo
I like a good bit of home made Coronation Chicken for the old sandwiches though.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:07, Reply)

RIGHT FUCK IT!
I'm buying a huge chicken today and ain't noone gonna stop me.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:07, Reply)

Noooo!
*drags Noel away from the butchers*


If you must then try to get a free range one.
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:09, Reply)

It'll break the bank I'm afraid.
As much as I hate it I'm too poor to afford an extra 60% on the price of a chicken to feed the kid and I. I do wholeheartedly intend to buy only free-range when I'm a bit more flush. I only buy free-range eggs though.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:17, Reply)

"I used to be quite a fussy eater until I became a vegetarian"
Sentence of the week
(TheColonel, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:55, Reply)

The best thing about Prawn is the texture
can anyone MTFU like me though and suck the head half of the brain juices / other mushy prawn flavour once you've eaten the flesh? That's what Rick Stein told me to do one time and I like it.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:48, Reply)

Oh my God
That's horrific
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:49, Reply)

I'd do it
I've been to Japan, i'll eat anything once.
( Peej, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:57, Reply)

Did you try...
live sea urchin?
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:02, Reply)

He was obvioulsy taking the piss

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:58, Reply)

Nope
I've seen it a few times elsewhere, particularly among celebrity chefs! Is apparently mandatory in Mediterranean countries..
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:59, Reply)

No!
That would mean sucking on the other end.
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:59, Reply)

Ooh, I do that
It's a traditional Spanish thing, or so I was taught. Just liking eating a whole sardine with your bare hands.
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

I've got to get myself to a nice Spanish seaside town
they really know how to treat seafood!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:56, Reply)

They so do
I could eat a plate of boquerones (cured anchovy-type things) and pickled peppers on toast for breakfast right now.
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:01, Reply)

Lordy
It's the whole sardines you mentioned that I do crave though, simply grilled with a bit of seasoning and olive oil.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:04, Reply)

I loooooooooooove......................
Prawns, broccoli, cauliflower and the Brussels sprout
But olives they are fucking rank so I will go without.
( Peej, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 8:53, Reply)

Did this deliberately rhyme?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:19, Reply)

not at first
but when I realised it scanned like a poem I rewrote it.
( Peej, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Um diddle diddle iddle um diddle ay

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:29, Reply)

But what's the difference between a big prawn
and a langostine?

Woo first crustacean question of the day!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Ha ha
*remembers 'crustacean' joke from 1985*
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:06, Reply)

Proper different animals innit?

( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:08, Reply)

They look pretty much the same and

taste pretty much the same
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:11, Reply)

langoustines have long thin claw type things
they are more like skinny lobsters than prawns
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:23, Reply)

A Langoustine is a Prawn that's been to France on its holidays.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:52, Reply)

shudders
can't stand olives, or tomatoes, its a weird texture thing grapes are good but tomatoes make me want to gag
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:12, Reply)

I have a mate who gags on tomatoes

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:14, Reply)

Gag on tomatoes?
What's the difference between a tomato and...

Oh, wait - not that sort of gag?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:16, Reply)

Those type of gags just aren't aesthetically pleasing

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:19, Reply)

its the bite
on the skin then the following squidgy juice explosion that I don't like, struggle to even eat a sliced tomato
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:21, Reply)

I love that aspect
of cherry tomatoes.

Although I usually end up getting tomato juice down the front of my shirt.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:22, Reply)

I was like that as a kid
Are canned tomatoes more bearable?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:23, Reply)

I love
chopped tomoatoes, happily make pasta sauces and stuff with them
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:23, Reply)

Canned tomatos served as a vegetable
Looking like boiled bollocks next to your chicken pie.

Massive culinary blunder. Getting at them requires the same operating technique as a vasectomy.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:29, Reply)

Thread jack attempt
I have to buy the cream cakes for the proles in my office Today. Should I get them from Greggs or M&S?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Oh go to M&S
It'll be more expensive, but not so much so that you'll be getting evicted next week.
M&S chocolate eclairs FTW.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:25, Reply)

Thanks for that

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:30, Reply)

Anytime kid
I never asked how Saturday went, how was it?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:34, Reply)

Lemon Drizzle cake was rather good thanks
I need a bit of practice before it gets good enough for photographing, but it drew no complaints.

Your proper Bday is this weekend nes pas.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:42, Reply)

Excellente!
Yeah, mine is on Sunday :)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Aquarians Rock

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:48, Reply)

They truly are the bestest people on Earth
Totally unappreciated.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Why must you buy cake?

I must also buy cake today and was pondering exactly ther same question!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Prawn - cockroach of the sea
I've always liked brussel sprouts, have come to like broccoli, am on the fence about olives and don't care for cauliflower.

I HATE rhubarb.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:26, Reply)

I don't like rhubarb
But my landlady made rhubarb and ginger jam and it was beautiful.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:29, Reply)

*face turns inside out just thinking about it*

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:31, Reply)

apple and rhubarb crumble
droooools
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

My parents had a fruit cage
and extensive veg beds, as well as several apple and pear trees - I used to whinge about 'sour English fruits' as a boy but I am coming around to gooseberries, rhubarb etc. My mother had a whole separate chest freezer for her garden produce, fucking hundreds of Kilner jars full of pickled and preserved fruit and veg.....and then there was the pickles & jams cupboard, which without exaggeration would usually house 50+ jars of each.

It was a bit much, to be honest.

Apart from celery and the marzipan/licquorice family I like pretty much everything.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

Did they have particularly vicious fruit?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:45, Reply)

Not really, although our garden did have a military theme of sorts
Our garage was originally stables, and there were arrowslits in the walls. It was pretty fucking ace now I come to think of it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:48, Reply)

You are prince Edward
AICMFP
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:51, Reply)

Is this an oblique way of calling me a shirter?
It had better not be old boy. I have swords, you know.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Swordssssssss
You can't just have one can you?

Anyway I have a battle axe. It just needs a handle.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:57, Reply)

*offers penis*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:59, Reply)

*declines*
Unless its 2 feet long and made of Ash.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:00, Reply)

50% there

After a horrfic threshing machine accident a kindly carpenter called Jepeto took me and rebuilt me as the son he never had...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:03, Reply)

Does it get longer if you lie?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:05, Reply)

Bend over and ask me if I'm a millionaire

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:17, Reply)

I have the sword
worn by one of my antecedents to the coronation of George V. My father aoplogised to me when he gave it to me, because the blade is a little bent - from beating his younger brother round the head with it, he said.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:00, Reply)

I feel that if I ever met you
I should tug my forelock.

Except I don't have one. Will a curtsey do?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:03, Reply)

You sound posh Monty.
Will you knight me? Not in a shirty way obviously.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:09, Reply)

The poshness has rather fizzled out, unfortunately.
My father was born into a minor stately home in the Scottish borders with servants etc, and his mother's family used to co-own Pringle - but all that has translated into precisely fuck all in real terms.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:13, Reply)

Did you get free Pringles then?
That would have been WIN.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:16, Reply)

The golfwear company, you spanner

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:18, Reply)

I knew what you meant
Was your grandad mates with Lenny Bennett and Jimmy Tarbuck?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:19, Reply)

Certainly not!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:20, Reply)

You protest too much
I knew you were part of the light entertainment hierarchy.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:27, Reply)

I'm not!
Ask Barry Cryer.

I did find it amusing that Alan Partridge's 'peephole Pringle' was part of my family's legacy, I must admit.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:30, Reply)

I did think that
but I've decided not to elicit sordidness for a whole hour
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:32, Reply)

I hate celery, marzipan and liquorice
And love jams and chutneys.
I reckon I'm the bastard kid your mum had when she had an affair with a commoner.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Marizpan is soooo good

Chutney is also good, chutney ferrets less so.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:48, Reply)

Are you my brother?

My Mum was exactly the same fruit cage, apple trees, peach tree, pears etc, they moved after 37 years in the same house, and some of the stuff at the bottom of the chest freezer was around 37 years old...we didn't eat it.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Fucking hell our mother was a friendly girl!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:48, Reply)

Do you have an obsession with Nazis and midgets
and Japanese horror?

If you do then yes, I am indeed your brother.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Nazi's and midgets yes

Japanese horror less so...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:52, Reply)

I hate cheese
except on pizzas and in toasted sandwiches, but only if I make the sandwich myself.

The stuff mostly just freaks me out. I've got real issues with it.
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Oh man cheese is like hugs to me

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:51, Reply)

Seems like everyone loves it
It's like a badge of fitting in that I will never have, or something.
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:04, Reply)

Embrace your uniqueness

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Wouldn't touch it as a kid
Came round to it as an adult. Apparently it's all to do with whether you can digest it properly and you don't develop all the relevant enzymes until later on. Try it every so often, you may find you like it of a sudden.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:17, Reply)

I couldn't live without cheese

I had some in little French restaurant near where I live, it was so soft it was acyually a liquid at room temperature, le nyoms!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Have to add for the record
I pretty much like everything. I've tried most seafoods apart from the extreme exotic stuff and the same with land-based food stuffs.

The only thing I grimace at is too much melted cheese. The soft, extra greasy type which catches in my throat and makes me gag. This is a deep-seated reaction to a food poisoning experience from my youth.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 9:55, Reply)

I think my cheese-phobia is down to something from my youth
I've got loads of weird psychological associations tied to it.
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:03, Reply)

My problem was...
Just before the onset of the perpetual eviction of all bodily fluids, I made myself a small treat to make myself feel better.

I peeled about 6 baby bells and stuck them in the microwave alone on a plate. Most people probably know that microwaves melt cheese in a strange kind of super-efficient way that intensifies the grease and liquidity.

Anyway this silly child necked the whole bloody lot and within the hour I was literally spewing up my stomach lining. Couldn't take anything for days - even diluting juice, or water! It was horrendous and even the thought of those days now makes me queasy.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:07, Reply)

I'm the same with omletts
any other style of egg is fine, I just can't stomach (or spell) omletts
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:19, Reply)

Actually it's touch and go with me and omelettes
I like them but they sometimes disagree. I wonder why.
An omelette once caused me to wake in the night with a crippling pain high in my abdomen.
I went and ejected everything upwards and almost immediately felt better.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:21, Reply)

I should clarify Finn's posting above
"Diluting juice", is what we Scots call orange squash!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:21, Reply)

As a family we once visited my mother's great aunts in Scotland
They were two formidable spinsters in their late 80s, and their house was like stepping back into the 1940s. I recall their sitting room contained about 20 sets of little nesting tables for tea and cakes etc.

They gave us neat squash, and to be polite, we fucking well drank it.


/trauma
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:23, Reply)

I love stories like that

I once ate a whole packet of boubon biscuits and drank 2ltrs of lilt because it had been bought specifically for my visit.

I appreciate that many rotund internet people may eat this on a daily hourly basis!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:26, Reply)

Do you think they served you that on purpose, or was she senile?
Either or, the undiluted stuff is fucking rank. Concentrated diabetes.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:29, Reply)

It's no better after being run through a Soda Stream, I can tell you.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:34, Reply)

My family
were probably the last people on earth to acquire a Soda Stream. We were given it by an elderly parishioner of my father's.

We were SO excited. For about an hour, until we tasted the shit. Make economy Happy fucking Shopper cola in your own home!! ACE!!!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:36, Reply)

I never had one, which may explain a lot of things
However my mate did, and the fucking mess we made with it was bang out of order....fizzy milk anyone? the next time I went up, it had been binned.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Haha I'm pretty sure
we tried to fizz up anything possible, too. We'd have carbonated fucking paté if we could have...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:47, Reply)

I think they just didn't know
it needed to be handled any differently from orange juice - in fact I think it was offered as such. I think it may have been 'Quosh'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:34, Reply)

Quosh, nice one.
That opened the vault doors there, and as I peaked in I saw a few packets of Ipso's and a bag of Ranchero's peeking out at me.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Hah!
Didn't realise my err, how uncouth of me.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 11:01, Reply)

I just went to Waitrose to get my chicken.
Regular 'shares our welfare standards' bird, 1.8kg, £5.50.
Free-range bird, 1.8kg, £9.60.
Christ.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:25, Reply)

Je'us!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:34, Reply)

No kiddin'.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:37, Reply)

How much would a bog standard chicken cost?

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Tesco were doing medium caged birds, two for five quid last year.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:43, Reply)

God that's awful.
You can just imagine how they've been treated.
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:46, Reply)

Good.
I hate the evil beady-eyed scratchy little fuckers. Make them suffer, I say.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:48, Reply)

I had a dream about chickens last night.
Odd. Did you watch Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall's show about standard birds and welfare standards? It was Tesco's two for a fiver thing that kicked it off.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:51, Reply)

I did.
And I had a long, leisurely wank, watching them all falling over and diseased.

In truth it was fairly shocking. I like Hugh - my brother-in-law's father's organic watercress farm was featured once.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:57, Reply)

He is a fucking legend.
He's accompanied me on my culinary revolution and inspired me to one day go hunting and fishing and kill, skin, gut, cook and eat my quarry. One day.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 11:01, Reply)

Actually
Caged birds are treated a hell of a lot better than the ones which are raised in communal areas in sheds. Even free range birds will attack the weaker members of the group. Battery farming may seem cruel, and of course it's far from ideal, but other methods of raising birds have their own problems.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:50, Reply)

Settle down Hugh
I suppose if they have been brought up only knowing 'the cage' then they don't really know what they are missing, therefore it isn't cruel at all and in fact is nice and cosy and fox free.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:52, Reply)

Even then, I'm not sure a chicken would watch a video of free-range birds wandering about and pecking at seed
and go "Ooh, I'd like a bit of that myself."
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:59, Reply)

Don't forget
To roast parsnips and carrots with the chicken. Yum!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 4 Feb 2010, 10:50, Reply)