Black Cloud.
My little girl's mother has just cancelled both this weekend AND next week's visits just like that. I didn't see her last weekend either because I was ill.

I want to cry.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:27, 119 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Aw, jeez that sucks.
I feel like jumping on a train and kidnapping your daughter just so you can see her.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:31, Reply)

I'm so sorry : (

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Bottle of cognac for supper I think.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:34, Reply)

What's her excuse this time?

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:34, Reply)

Other than being a total bitch.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:35, Reply)

None whatsoever.
'you can't see her because she won't be around. I don't have to give a reason, just notice. Fuck you'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:37, Reply)

Kick her in the muff!
Honestly though mate, that's really shit. I hate the fact she's got this power over you. I know from experience how incredibly depressing and heartbreaking that kind of manipulation can be.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:40, Reply)

It's times like this
that I realise that the phrase 'heartbroken' is not just metaphorical. I feel like someone's ripped my heart from my chest.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:43, Reply)

I used to get a horrible twisting feeling in my gut
whenever daughter's mum pulled this kind of shit.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:47, Reply)

Indescribable, isn't it?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:48, Reply)

Utterly.
I know there's no comfort. Try and look forward to your next meeting and plan something fucking spectacular so you know you'll both have a whale of a time. It won't be long before she starts asking questions of her mum and she'll want regularity in your contact.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:57, Reply)

^This
There will come a time when she will demand to see you. I mean ffs, you're the coolest dad I know of.
( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:00, Reply)

^ and then this
It all seems to come down to Mummy's mood swings as far as I can see. Does your poor daughter not get a say in the matter? You always seem to have a great time when you do get to see her, so I'd be surprised if she wasn't at the very least a little disappointed about this turn of events.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Her mother seems to see her
as some kind of human Honda Accord, for her to use on me to get her fucked-up revenge on me for finishing with her.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:28, Reply)

So - if you don't mind me asking - had you done anything to upset the Uber-Bitch before she forced this decision upon you?
Or is it actually just down to her mood swings?
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:31, Reply)

She claimed the mood swings were hormonal
Bit hard to still pass them off as such nearly two years after giving birth though, eh?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Well, quite. And even if they were hormonal,
her case for depriving you of your daughter for two weeks is on even shakier ground than Haiti. As Noel suggests further down, I wonder if it's worth keeping a record of these things - after all, if she's still suffering post-natal mood swings as she claims, a good solicitor might argue that the child's father should be allowed more access to check on the child's well-being. And if she's not, then a good solicitor should tell her to stop being such a stroppy bitch and allow you your weekend visits.

But all this advice is for another day when you're feeling less sore. For the time being, I shall proffer a manly internet hug
*manly internet hugs*
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:45, Reply)

Thank you my friend.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:51, Reply)

Sorry, dude.
:(
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:35, Reply)

At risk of being called a shirter...
...I offer you an internet hug.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:35, Reply)

What does a motherfucker need to do to pacify a bitch?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:37, Reply)

There's only one man who can help in these sort of situations.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:38, Reply)

Bowie?
runs like fuck
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Nick Griffin is blanking my calls, though.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Well if that's true that's something to smile about.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:47, Reply)

I fail to see what I can do here

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:40, Reply)

You can GET OFF MY STAGE

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:41, Reply)

Is it me and my organ that can help?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:41, Reply)

commiserations old chap
can't begin to understand how shit that makes you feel.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:41, Reply)

I just cannot believe how shit this woman is.
My sister went through a very bad patch with her ex but always made sure my nephew got to see him regularly. My dad left my mum for another woman when we were all quite small but always made sure we got to see him when we could. How can someone not want their child to know their father unless he's a complete rapist or something.

It beggers belief.
( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:44, Reply)

The irony is that she's the one with form for violence.
I wish to God I'd had her arrested when she used to kick off.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:48, Reply)

That's shit
*Internet Hugs*
(bill, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:52, Reply)

Is she legally allowed to do this?
I'd cunt her in the fuck! When me and my missus have an argument she always uses the "I'll stop you seeing your daughter" threat to make me give in. I hate her for doing it.
( Peej, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Apparently so.
I have a court order that cost me months of anguish and many thousands of pounds, and is entirely worthless, it seems.

If I take her back to court (again at my expense) they will just tell her off.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:56, Reply)

Suerly if you need to do this often enough the court will get pissed off ?
Possibly make another order which would be enforceable?

Just guessing though. Noel?
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:58, Reply)

Couldn't say, never done the official thing until recently.
It's worth keeping a written record of every time she messes you about like this which you can refer to in future mediation or legal action though. I'm not sure how much further you'd get with court action but it might be worth talking to your solicitor about getting mediation to discuss and sign-up to a regular contact schedule. If she refuses mediation or breaks any agreement you've got a much better chance in court subsequently.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:06, Reply)

Grrrrr which is why if you win they should have to pay your costs
Seriously Cunt her right in the fuck!
( Peej, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:08, Reply)

I wouldn't put up with that, never again.
It's the most horrible form of emotional blackmail and I simply wouldn't stand for it at all.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:00, Reply)

Deep breath mate and square those shoulders.
Just make sure she knows how much you love her when you do see her, and make sure she knows it was mummy that stopped her seeing you (but in an entirely non-judgemental and sympathetic way).

Oh, and become BFF with Noel. He's nice.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:55, Reply)

*Dons dress and offers self as substitute*
"Oh this, I just had it lying around, you like it? Well it does bring out my rosy cheeks!"

Seriously mate that's shit and I feel for you
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:59, Reply)

I'll do it for you all

substitute prostitute
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 13:59, Reply)

I just re read these two posts.
Are you basically saying you'd dress up as Monty's daughter?
Then you did a strikethrough suggesting that monty would have sex with you, while you're dressed as his daughter?

That's innappropriate even for here.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:02, Reply)

no, it's ok
he offered his services to all of us...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:03, Reply)

So he's saying we can all sleep with him while he's dressed as monty's daughter?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:05, Reply)

I don't know how you think that is inappropriate
you're just weird

(pssst, what does the sarcasm punctuation mark look like again?)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:06, Reply)

(!)

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:07, Reply)

Tehe
I forgot about that!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:09, Reply)

hey you
how's tricks?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:14, Reply)

Jolly good thank you.
I’ve just ordered myself a rather dashing leather satchel so its all hunky-dory thanks. How are you doing?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:17, Reply)

lovely
I've recently ordered myself a load of books in preparation for going on holiday. Sadie from World of Books was most helpful.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Oooh exciting!
What books did you get? I always find that Play.com has some super cheap offers when it comes to books, I’m also highly pleased with their free delivery – take THAT Amazon!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:23, Reply)

various sci fi and fantasy ones
I don't tend to buy new books because I'd bankrupt myself in no time given how much I read.

the ones I bought ranged from 1p to £2.82
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:33, Reply)

A WHOLE 1p! That’s wicked!! :D

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:35, Reply)

postage is £1.95 each, but that's not too bad overall

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:56, Reply)

Nope that's good going
Well done sir!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:57, Reply)

much obliged

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:59, Reply)

I feel a bit sick now, I have too say.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:06, Reply)

Yes and yes
Although I'm sure you can figure out that I was not suggesting Monty's daughterhas been/is/or ever will be anything but an entirely reputable member of society.

At the risk of sounding like David Brent sometimes little humour can be helpful, all ment in jest.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:06, Reply)

Awww that's terrible news
*internet hugs*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:01, Reply)

If it's any consolation
you aren't alone in having a shit weekend to look forward to. Christ I'm even tempted to do some h**sework or g*rdening due to the lack of daytime activity I have planned! Bored shitless does not come near it...
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:03, Reply)

some of the responses here are brilliant
"You don't get to see your daughter for two weeks? Tell me about it, I'm going to be slightly bored this weekend"
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:04, Reply)

it's a very long story
Psycho , which I would not expect you to understand. Monty does though, it's been discussed before. Just wasn't going down the sentimental blubber inducing road, not that I need to explain that to you.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:32, Reply)

Everything needs to be explained to me,
I'm very stupid.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:57, Reply)

I'll be your pretend daughter if that will cheer you up?

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Pffft!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:19, Reply)

Yes please, Donkey Gums
Would you like me to read you a story about dogs and rainbows?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:24, Reply)

this might cheer you up
this www.b3ta.com/talk/6737682
then this www.b3ta.com/talk/6737763
then this www.b3ta.com/talk/6737787
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:23, Reply)

I doubt it.

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:25, Reply)

happy now
www.b3ta.com/talk/6737838
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:28, Reply)

Hahahahahaha
Do'h!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:33, Reply)

I'm past caring now.

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:42, Reply)

JMG got banned for 24 hours

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:46, Reply)

JMG BANNED?
OMG!!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:49, Reply)

Who will save the internet!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:50, Reply)

SAVE US, MODGAZZER GENERAL!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:56, Reply)

My sentiments exactly!

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:56, Reply)

friz's best post in a while
www.b3tards.com/u/bad7436b035054876c55/bully.gif
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:58, Reply)

It's good because it doesn't have his fat face in it

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:01, Reply)

Booo this has been blocked by my work interwebs
What is it please?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:09, Reply)

a cartoon of rob telling a young boy from /talk off
the /qotw person is standing behind rob looking like a spastic.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:12, Reply)

Sounds about right!
*gurns*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:14, Reply)

Now that's brilliant.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:10, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:00, Reply)

SUCCESS!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:26, Reply)

his point was that he obviously had to go faster to close the distance right?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:30, Reply)

something like that,
it caused a talk uproar.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:32, Reply)

I thought it was all quite funny

I bet it was SpankyHanky's gimp brigade that complained
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:34, Reply)

bit out of proportion I feel
as the OP could've been doing 30 and the police might still have driven at 90 to catch him up.

not clear cut enough for such a ridiculous argument
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:36, Reply)

That entire thread
resembles the rambling of a retard. Yes, even the talkers despite their "expert" handling of the internet.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:42, Reply)

Take her to court
it's worth £500 just to make her look like a cunt in an official setting.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:41, Reply)

B3ta whipround
As a parent I feel very strongly and am more qualified to talk about it than a non parent Seriously, I'd stick a fiver in and I'm broke.
( Peej, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:43, Reply)

I'm in.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:45, Reply)

same here
and when I say in, I mean "in your mum"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:47, Reply)

Leave some money on the sideboard when you finish.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:48, Reply)

money residual semen sideboard curtains
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:55, Reply)

waaaay ahead of you my friend

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:58, Reply)

same

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:48, Reply)

Bless you.
Kind words such as these have really helped today, and will be repaid in beer at Motorhead if not before.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Well you know how you can repay me : )

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:02, Reply)

*gets taxi to station*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:06, Reply)

There's no need to run away.

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:07, Reply)

there's no need to
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:08, Reply)

^ you have achieved the impossible
and have actually made me do a 'Lol' despite feeling so shit.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:08, Reply)

: )

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:10, Reply)

you've got to go and fuck her now
it's the law
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:13, Reply)

Eh!
He was going to do me a mix tap of Hawkwind.
( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:15, Reply)

I'm sure he was

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:16, Reply)

a mix tap of Hawkwind up the shitter
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:18, Reply)

How vulgar.

( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:18, Reply)

vulgar arousing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:19, Reply)

how Christ that's
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Well since I'm getting picked on again, I'm off.
Have fun!

Edit - Sorry! apart from Monty.
( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:20, Reply)

picked on?
we're just helping you get your true feelings out
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:22, Reply)

true feelings etc
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:25, Reply)

well, that too

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:26, Reply)

*photoshops a Hawkwind logo onto a bath tap image*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:18, Reply)

Haha!
Just noticed.
( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:20, Reply)

We should all get together and kick her in the cunt.

(The Boy Monders I have ginger bits in my beard., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 15:31, Reply)

Black Cloud
Hope I've got the replying right. Monty, it'a time to pull your big girls panties on, think of her not you!

Stop crying.

Like you all, ready for love

xxxxx
(BalthasarusWhodatSaintdeVinci, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 23:18, Reply)