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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Operation successful.
Daughter now totally fine, now stuffing her face and drinking juice apparently.

Thank fuck for that.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:44, 167 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

face nose
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:44, Reply)
FUCK YOU I WANTED TO SAY THAT

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:45, Reply)
that makes it all the sweeter

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:47, Reply)

that makes it all the sweeter

Shut up, Chompy
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:48, Reply)
and relax.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:45, Reply)
Glad to hear she's ok, monty
what was wrong with her?
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:45, Reply)
She's taking after her dad and stuffing stuff up her nose until she ends up in hospital.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:49, Reply)
terrible business
has anyone notified the proper authorities?
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:51, Reply)
Don't you mean......
...

...
nose-tified?
(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:56, Reply)
It's small wonder we're both alone

(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:08, Reply)
puns should be illegal

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:13, Reply)
rape's illegal
but that's never stopped him
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:14, Reply)
it's not rape if you push back, bertie

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:15, Reply)
heehee
I used to work for the forces, and all the Navy guys used to say that to me

as they filled my puckered shithole
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:20, Reply)
what with, seamen?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:26, Reply)
PUN
Where is INTERNETLAWERMAN when you need him? This calls for serious class action, I demand an injunctiona against any further pun posts from rachelswipe
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:31, Reply)
neeeeeeeeever gonna happen
i am puntastic.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:52, Reply)
Arrrrrrrrgh!

(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Sat 7 Aug 2010, 22:23, Reply)
people should be pun-ished

(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:14, Reply)
*Roger Moore 'Ooof!*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:21, Reply)
You've missed everything
She needed an operation and THEE ACTUAL EDMUND made a return and gave him advice
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:50, Reply)
seriously though
glad she's ok
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:47, Reply)
same here,

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:49, Reply)
copycat

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:50, Reply)

copy vampyre
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:19, Reply)

ampyre isa
(I helped save b3ta! Bazongaloid, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:22, Reply)
BULLY

(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:23, Reply)
Well that's good news.
For you and your daughter.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:47, Reply)
My daughter
has to have an operation on her toes. I DO NOT LIKE THIS!

Nobody hurts my daughter, even if its to make her better!
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:47, Reply)
Glad to hear it.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:48, Reply)
I fucking nailed aysha.
NAILED IT. Just the once though. I did it by accident and then couldn't remember what I did.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:55, Reply)
Sounds like the conversations I overhear chavs having on the bus.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:57, Reply)
I thought you were too stuck up to get the bus

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:01, Reply)
That's because you're too self centered to notice anything about other people.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:03, Reply)
that's nice dear.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:12, Reply)
haha
fantastic mental image here of you reading a newspaper while Pyschochomp fumes
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:17, Reply)
She'll be reading the comics bit.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Arghh! Nice one!
Well done.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:02, Reply)
cheers :D
She had us doing brass monkey with no legs on as well. I failed.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:13, Reply)
That sounds terrfiying.
I'm glad I wasn't there.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:13, Reply)
It would have been if I had even been able to attempt it but my brass monkey is retarded so I couldn't even get up there

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Excellent
Did she get to keep the raisin?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:48, Reply)
I bet Monty's ex ate it
edit: I don't know why I said that
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:49, Reply)
Because it's funny?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:51, Reply)
Good news

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:50, Reply)
what did Cruella have to say for herself? and how did the anaesthesia go?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:50, Reply)
She was machine gunned, along with the rest of the Romanovs
I don't care what any of the conspiracy theorists say.

What?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:51, Reply)
ummmmmmmmmmmmm ?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:54, Reply)
Anaesthesia...
...apologies, I've had a lot of caffiene today and my sense of humour is really very odd.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:01, Reply)
no it's fine
I was pretty sure I'd got that wrong but I was expecting a spelling Nazi not a spelling mental.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:04, Reply)
The spelling was perfect
My addled humour less so.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:05, Reply)
I've only just got it.
Damn you, 3hrs' kip brain...
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:07, Reply)
My mind goes off at tangents all the time
Especially if I've had more than four cups of coffee.

*fidgets*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:10, Reply)
I still don't get it you smart bastards

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:33, Reply)
Anastasia Romanov

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:34, Reply)
I will read

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Here you go
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anastasia_Romanov
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:34, Reply)
Embarrassed actually knew this.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)
Glad she's fine :)

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:51, Reply)
Fantastic news
Give the ex a boot to the cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:53, Reply)
Yay and good for her, and you.
Until next time at least.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:53, Reply)
Sweet
I'm glad.

Does that mean you're in a better mood and I can mention things that I like without you wanting to spit in my hair?
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 13:56, Reply)
All you have to do now is get through her first serious burn and her falling down the stairs.
It will happen.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:02, Reply)
I didn't get my first serious burn until I was nine
But I did it in style by one leg being totally ablaze
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:04, Reply)
I put my hand on a hot cooker ring.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:05, Reply)
Pussy
Walking into a blowtorch is where it's at
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:06, Reply)
I'm still young.
I'll give it a go.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:07, Reply)
leg against a heater
branded :(
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:10, Reply)
leg and foot against a motorcycle exhaust pipe when I was 3
I'm well 'ard innit
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:14, Reply)
It's ace
No judo for months
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:10, Reply)
Ow!
How?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:06, Reply)
See above

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:06, Reply)
Argh!
No long term damage done I hope?

The same sentiment applies to BGB and her unfortunate cooker ring incident.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:09, Reply)
I was about to have skin grafts, when they noticed it had started healing really well
They left it a bit longer, a bit longer, and woops! 23 years later, there's very little trace.
I must be super-resilient.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:12, Reply)
Skin grafts...
...I've got a couple, on my left hand and behind my ears. Trufax.

Better off without them IMHO.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:14, Reply)
Well it became apparent that they weren't needed
I don't know what would happen if someone needed them and didn't get them
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:19, Reply)
There on the stair!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:07, Reply)
Ha!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:12, Reply)
Blim burn from someone next to me tokeing on a bifta at a party when I was 19
About the size of a pea on my right wrist.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Okay, it's not what you'd call serious...
...but it hurt like heck.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:22, Reply)
^ does anyone else find this post a bit menacing?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:04, Reply)
The Hand That Rocks the Cradle?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:05, Reply)
The Turning of the Screw

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:10, Reply)
Sorry! it does sound a bit creepy.
Just trying to put across the fact that no matter how careful you are, shit happens.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:07, Reply)
It sounds like a threat.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:08, Reply)
Well it would sound like a threat if it was coming from a six foot peadophile and not me.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:09, Reply)
where IS that Crow boy?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:10, Reply)
Aw! be nice to him.
He's split with the mrs.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:11, Reply)
No way?
He's a lovely chap.

Am saddened to hear this.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:12, Reply)
I'm not
He's a younger version of dj and is now available.
My lonely weekends just gained potential.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:13, Reply)
Get off!
He's mine.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:16, Reply)
*tuts*
Alright thennnnn
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:19, Reply)
You should be happy to hand him to me.
You have one already. In perfect working order and everything.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:22, Reply)
He's perfect, but he's 200 miles away
Roota has neeeeeds
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:25, Reply)
God I really don't myself, these days.
I associate it with emotional trauma: not the world's finest aphrodisiac....
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:28, Reply)
I actually only want sex when I'm actually 'with' someone
Whereas I have a friend who will ring men up simply because she's in ze mood
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:31, Reply)
^This
I can't do one night stands anymore.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:35, Reply)
I only ever had them because of booze and bad judgement
What does someone really get out of making a booty call?
I'm perfectly capable of having an orgasm on my own, innit?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:38, Reply)
^^^THISSSSSSSSS

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)
I guess the post-sex awkward and guilty feeling is addictive?

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)
Possibly
She doesn't seem to feel guilty or bothered at all.
She says she's turning the tables.
I don't see it as empowering for anyone involved.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:41, Reply)
Turning the tables by putting herself out there to be used?
I don't see how... Serious denial going on IMHO.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:42, Reply)
She has a nack of picking men who get besotted and want her to be their girlfriend
So she's not being used as such, but I still don't think she's doing herself any favours.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:47, Reply)
Not at all
Sooner or later, the offers dry up and she'll be full of regret.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:51, Reply)
She needs to get better at wanking
And at judging men
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:52, Reply)
far too obvious strikethrough

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:52, Reply)
Brilliant work!
I like your style...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:56, Reply)
To be honest I had a female friend who was sex mad and put herself about.
She had a whale of a time. She eventually found 'the one' and got married.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:47, Reply)
It works for some, but not for others
I think I'd like to have not wasted an opportunity or two from my past, but it's all with the benefit of hindsight.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:49, Reply)
Sweet!
When did Lampito get married?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:35, Reply)
it's not being used
if you both want it. It's not something I'd do myself, but if she's happy with it, it's not 'being used'
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I agree
But it leads to more hassle than a good shuffle on your own
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:54, Reply)
I agree absolutely
which is why I wouldn't do what she does.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:57, Reply)
Invariably though...
...some people read more into the situation than others. If men end up infatuated with Roota's mate then she's hinting at offering goods under false pretences.

Ergo, someone gets used.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:58, Reply)
It sure is
*winks*
(I helped save b3ta! Bazongaloid, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:42, Reply)
Same here.
Booze fuelled pickups. It was more about the adventure than the sex.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:40, Reply)
I just didn't know what I was doing
I was naive. The couple of times I've done that I've been steaming, not cared about matching underwear or shaved legs, yet still used a condom.
The subconscious is ace.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:43, Reply)
I never even managed that
it was quite frustrating when I'd see fucking ugly morons managing to pick up women and yet never manage it myself.

I'm sure I didn't miss much, but at the time it would've been nice to lose my V plates earlier or to bump the grand total up.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:42, Reply)
Nope.
You've missed nowt.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:43, Reply)
^this

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:45, Reply)
It's just numbers...
...it becomes meaningless when you're in a secure relationship.

[edit]

Sorry, I didn't mean to come across as a sanctimonious cunt.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:44, Reply)
it's true though
I've had a mere 3 partners, two of which were in long-term things, and as a result the sex has generally been great. Can't imagine it would be even close during a drunken fumble.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:46, Reply)
Drunken fumble sex is 95% rubbish in my humble experience

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:47, Reply)
I often think like this
But then I remember that I've had some absolutely stellar wanks.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:44, Reply)
What, like in orbit or something?
*runs*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:45, Reply)
you're on form
you should drink too much coffee more often
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:46, Reply)
I approve of this.
Hang on, does this mean I'm a dullard cunt when not under the influence of stimulants?

*awaits barrage of insults*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:48, Reply)
yes, yes it does

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:48, Reply)
I kind of asked for that

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:49, Reply)
indeed you did :-D
not the case, but it's the speed and frequency that I've been impressed with this afternoon.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:51, Reply)
Some days I can't keep up with OT
But today makes up for it.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:53, Reply)
You're on FIRE today, old boy.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:57, Reply)
You have all the time in the world.
I'll be all dried up soon.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:30, Reply)
I'm like an Action Man 'down there' now.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:31, Reply)
You're better off.
I had a period of happy celibacy and it was much less stressful.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:38, Reply)
It is a cast-iron fact
that most of the pain in my life has been caused by my relationships. I miss the company and having someone to cook for, more than anything, really.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:40, Reply)
Ha, your only problem is that you're far too good for the majority of chaps out there

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Awwwwwwwww!
*blushes*

fanks!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:33, Reply)
Isn't Crow
even further away than that, though?
(berk, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:37, Reply)
Yeah but if they could alternate their visits up North
I'd never be lonely on a Saturday night ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)
This is why I hate the weekends.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:40, Reply)
I jest
I fucking love my weekends.
I hate it when it's a birthday or something and I have to haul my arse off the couch, leave my Tigger and go out.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:44, Reply)
Don't say that publicly, lampito will be knocking down his door in 20

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:12, Reply)
She found out about the paedophilia, then?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:13, Reply)
Kids she didn't mind
it was the rampant bumdering that bothered her.*

*I have entirely made this up
(berk, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:36, Reply)
True that
my little girl's a bit of a daredevil on her scooter, and has so far ended up having her chin and her hand glued back together after seperate accidents
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Nugget 1 had an unfortunate altercation with some barbed wire whilst biking the other week.
A&E glued up the wounds but his scars are still quite angry looking.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:25, Reply)
I thin k I saw that on facebook
sounds absolutely mental
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:30, Reply)
Ha, every time I take him out on a bike he falls off and hurts himself
That's what I tell The Social Services anyways.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:30, Reply)
...
I understood what she meant.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Sat 7 Aug 2010, 22:25, Reply)
I didn't get mine until 2 years ago
when I put my arm through kettle steam trying to reach toast *belm*. They had to put a sign up at work and change the kettle and everything, it was well embarrassing.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:14, Reply)
i was 20
stupid landlord and his dodgy boiler. luckily it was a steam/boiling water burn so it hurt like fuck but didn't scar my ankle at all.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:18, Reply)
I've never had a serious burn or fallen down the stairs.
I did once cough a chillum all over myself whilst topless, covering my torso in little red-hot nuggets of hashish. That was painful but far from serious.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:23, Reply)
Ouch
Those little blims carry on burning for ages.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Tell me about it.
Some went in my belly button, on my nipples, everywhere...
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:28, Reply)
jesus
I've had the odd couple of blims on the chest from smoking a bed-reefer, but that sounds bloody dreadful
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)
Like a hot meteor shower with added munchies
*fears*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:41, Reply)
It was fucking awful.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:41, Reply)
I can imagine
in fact, I can't. Getting a blim on the nipple or caught deep in the belly button must be excruciating
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Trying to sort yourself out
when totally battered from chillums is not easy either. I think I just half-heartedly patted myself down and waiting for the little localised spots of agony to help me locate the blims.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:46, Reply)
I saw a dude in Christiania smoking the most enormous chillum
I swear it was 2 feet tall, 6 inches across at the top and he had at least a half on there.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:47, Reply)
My brother had a 6 foot water pipe
One night we wasted over an ounce of hash in it, it was rubbish, really, loads of it simply burned up in the air...
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:52, Reply)
what a pain
I've been hankering for a nice bong recently. I also remembered my idea for a revolver bong the other day. I need to develop the mechanism a bit and it'll be a winner.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:54, Reply)
Bongs are great
provided you know for absolute certain that you don't have anything to do for a while and have all the necessary supplies in.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:57, Reply)
very true
trouble is, we don't smoke in the house at my place, which means it's no good for bonging.

Not until I've sorted out my conservatory and put armchairs in it.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:58, Reply)
My little sister when she was about 4, fell down from the top of some wooden stairs in the hall.
We all stood around with bated breath waiting for the inevitable screaming. She got up without a sound and waddled off to the kitchen as though she'd just fallen off the bottom stair.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:21, Reply)
I got a dice stuck up my nose once
I was old enough to know better.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:31, Reply)
I won't do that strikethrough
But I giggled anyway
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:34, Reply)
Oh, I got something else
stuck up *that*.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:42, Reply)

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