Bank Holiday Ahoy!
'Tis a long weekend.

How will you be filling it? I am planning on drinking for most of it.

Alt Q: What makes you dead cool?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:02, 184 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Today I shall be mostly unpacking, cleaning and taking the dog to the vet.
Tomorrow I'm in Edinburgh, and after that I really haven't got a scooby.

Alt: dunno, you tell me?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:05, Reply)

Will you not have a scooby
Because you are leaving the dog with the vet?

Or am I getting my dog references mixed up?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:06, Reply)

Mixed up.
I must now go and tranquilise her as she gets utterly terrified as soon as she walks in the waiting room.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:07, Reply)

Tonight: Drink
Tomorrow: Clean house, brother arrive, go to Dad's 60th (Ceilidh, am rather nervous)
Sunday: Best mate coming down, beer, pizza and films
Monday: Recover/spend day in pub

Alt Q: My awesome clothing. Ask anyone from the BGB house bash.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:08, Reply)

Alt Q: You?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)

Minus the hat, this is what I was wearing

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:20, Reply)

Your yellows clash.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Usually, people's only complaints are "Argh, my retinas!"

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Bit of a gay putdown wasn't it?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)

Rather

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

Were you ever a member of 80's combo 'Black Lace'?
Agga-do-do-do.

Those shorts really are an adventure.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

n mis
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

You're just jealous
Of what, I'm not sure...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

Your ability to get a suntan just by hanging up your laundry?

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

yeah the hat is a bit over top.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Check this out for some funky shorts.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Those are magnificent

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

I haggled for them down through three currencys, from $50 down to £15, via YTL.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:35, Reply)

Nice.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:44, Reply)

I'm sure I speak for everyone too polite to mention it
when I say you look like a total prick.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:30, Reply)

I'm aware
And happy to be known as such.

I recently went to Bloodstock, wearing similar. Suprisingly, no-one ever had any difficulty locating me in a crowd, as compared to the other 10,000 wearing black.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

Only an autistic person could dress that badly.

( WormuIus, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:38, Reply)

Maybe his carer is autistic.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

We don't all need carers Chompy, only you...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:46, Reply)

Today I'm packing.
I'll be spending the bank holiday weekend and the rest of the week in tuscany. Just got my euros, I never realy get over how weird other currancies look.

Alt Q: Everything, obviously.
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)

I'm 'packing' every day.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)

heh

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:17, Reply)

yeah, fudge packing

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

double heh

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:34, Reply)

Alt Q: it's kind of hard to put a finger on precisely what it is that makes me so cool.
Is it my good looks, my amazing intellect and knowledge, my musical ability, my groovy clothes, my epic hair, my wit...I could go on, but I don't want people to feel too inferior, because I'm also really magnanimous and just plain nice too. I think it's a combination of all of these attributes. Mainly it's the modesty, though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:14, Reply)

*golf clap*

( WormuIus, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)

Answer taken from the 'standard book of comedic modesty vol 1,'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:16, Reply)

My ability to remember large swathes of Shakespeare.

( WormuIus, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:14, Reply)

Not so: it's because your shaman got 'Trauma' the other day.
And your love of the music of uber-cool legends Asia.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:20, Reply)

Even joking about that lowers the coolness in the world.

( WormuIus, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Drinking eating, sleeping, travelling
I wear a leather jacket.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:17, Reply)

No, you wear a jacket with leather elbow patches
It's a term of your early release.
( WormuIus, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:19, Reply)

You wear scarves indoors.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

You have grapes instead of eyes.

( WormuIus, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

rnuk has a bigger penis than you.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

ZING!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)

We've had this question already this morning
so I'll answer the alt Q. I found a trilby last year with a skull on it. That makes me feel cool. I've only worn it once though, such is its power of cool.

Disclaimer: coolness may be in the eye of the beholder.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:19, Reply)

I like triby hats.
I have 3 of them.

None of them have a skull on them though. You win the trilby hat coolness battle.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:21, Reply)

Here's me being really cool:


You can't see the skull, I may have to find a better picture. Or I'll wear it to Davros' bash, you coming?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)

Yes we all know you're a girl,
stop banging on about it.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

BUT LOOK HOW COOL I AM!!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

There's an awful lot of red lights there.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

we were in a gay bar
the wall changed colour.

Oh I just got what you mean, you're calling me a hooker. Well done, that was quite sly.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:27, Reply)

You appear to have shrunk

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

yeah the first one was massive by accident
as I said before, I'm only a lil attention whore.

Chompy, stop striking through attention immediately
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)

As previously covered.
The idea of meeting 'people from the Internet' fills me with fear.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

really?
I didn't know that. Furry muff.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:25, Reply)

It's the whole 'I won't know anyone and my social skills are pants' type thing.
Meaning I'd drink too much and make a massive tit of myself.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)

yeah no other b3tans do that

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:35, Reply)

Exactly.
And I'm rubbish with remembering names of people I've just met.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:38, Reply)

It gets easier
I'd advise attending a London Bash, make sure Lampito is there. That way, no matter what you do, you won't be the worst!

Although having said that, I'm going to the next London bash. Oh dear...*fears*
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:43, Reply)

In my head
The thought of attending a bash is a lot like training myself to like sprouts. I'd get there in the end, but would it be worth it?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Definitely
I've made friends at bashes, and had fantastic times.

Best was the BGB bash, the next day with me, BK and TGB talking about the Eddie Jordan rape problem on turn 9.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:47, Reply)

Well I won't rule it out completely.
But I'm still suspecious.

And, if I do relocate to a different part of the UK, having people I've never met before as a possible source of a pint might be welcome.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:50, Reply)

Pansy

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:55, Reply)

And my other big fear
Is people calling my a pansy.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:00, Reply)

That's the point of a bash.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:37, Reply)

I was like that for years
If you can see past the Asperger's, the fat and the Simpsons ties, most of the B3tans I've met are pretty OK.

Not so OK that you'd let your real friends meet them, of course.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:27, Reply)

I regularly drink and do MASSIVE DRUGS with a fellow b3tan
He's met most of my mates, as I with his
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)

That's because
you're the fattest Simpsons-tie-wearing Asperger of them all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Too much cake

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:35, Reply)

It's a fookin disgrace

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:40, Reply)

I like your thinking Boycie.
What sort of 'friends' are Internet friends?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

In all truth
apart from my brother I prefer this motley bunch of spanners to most of the people I know in real life.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Really?
Why?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

These are clever people on the whole.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:15, Reply)

I'm wearing a Monty Python tie today.
Otherwise you are mostly correct
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:43, Reply)

That's boss and 80s and saucy that pic

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

boss?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:32, Reply)

It's scouse for "dead good"

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:34, Reply)

If only Brookside was still on.
...lar.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:37, Reply)

thanks :D
I was being MJ, only paler.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:36, Reply)

paler blacker
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:37, Reply)

the lighting is flattering.
I'm paler. He's probably green by now.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:38, Reply)

It is a good pic, I'll give you that

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:41, Reply)

that one
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:46, Reply)

You'll do

( Kroney, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:47, Reply)

Trilby hats, 3 of
Jesus fucking wept.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)

shush you
don't knock it til you've tried it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

Did Jesus weep
Because he only had 2 trilby hats?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

No, because he hurt his hands
punching fuck out the sinner who had 3 Trilby hats
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

Jesus can't punch for shit.
Although he has taken compensating for this weakness a bit too far by making his own knuckle-duster. What sort of idiot puts nails through their hands before having a fight?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:36, Reply)

A mad, mad cunt
Jesus was a bare knuckle boxer in his prime, he kicked John the Baptist up and down a flight of stairs till he shat blood.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:43, Reply)

What was his fighting name?
In the red corner, weighing in at 10st 3, all the way from Bethlehem, your challenger 'Jesus 'the miracle-man' Christ!'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:48, Reply)

I am cool because I'm a good whistler

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)

My nan told me to never trust a woman who can whistle

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:25, Reply)

My great grandma said the same thing
She said a whistling woman whistles the divvil right up out of his den.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

My nan just said they were sluts
And that their mouths weren't the only things to whistle.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

Hahah go on!
If I had a whistling Mary I'd be making money out of it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:33, Reply)

I'm sure my nan would think you were lovely
But then she's gone a bit *waggles finger in a circle around his temple*
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:35, Reply)

Curly haired?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:43, Reply)

Nans mostly like me

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

That's because they're all your age

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:47, Reply)

i no rite!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:48, Reply)

Yes you do
You do write. Now have another biscuit and a cup of tea dear.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:49, Reply)

What is your favourite tune to whistle?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)

The whistling solo from 'Me and Julio' by Paul Simon.
I also do the riff from My Sweet Lord pretty shit hot too. .
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:30, Reply)

I can only whistle
With my fingers in my mouth.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:39, Reply)

I found that difficult, and couldn't do it until I was about 20,
when I learnt it from a guide in Maxim.

I've been able to do ordinary and toothy whistling since I was tiny.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

What is toothy whilsting?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:49, Reply)

I can't describe it
You kind of say 'pyow' rather than just toodling through your lips.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:50, Reply)

You are Roger Whittaker.
AICMFP
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:51, Reply)

No but that's what we call my uncle who taught me how to whistle.
He is unbelievable.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:56, Reply)

Hang on.
So I need to see your uncle to get my fiver?

When do you usually do your whistling?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:02, Reply)

All the while
But I'm banned from doing it in my hairdresser's
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:04, Reply)

Brilliant.
How long did you whistle for in the hairdressers before you were asked/told to stop?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:06, Reply)

12 and a half years
I just counted.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:08, Reply)

I know what you mean
...with your lips not pursed, unlike 'trad' whistling?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:53, Reply)

yeah
That's how I do guitar riffs by whistling.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:56, Reply)

can you do The Good, The Bad and The Ugly?
I think that's my favourite whistling number.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:52, Reply)

the thought will be awful to you
but look on youtube for the Ukelele Orchestra of Great Britain doing that tune. It's really quite good.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:54, Reply)

I can do that BOSS

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:56, Reply)

I'm so glad you are my BFF :-)

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:59, Reply)

Throw ya heeead back!
I wish our posts had sound :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:59, Reply)

I'm looking forward to this one
We're going clay pigeon shooting tomorrow and I have most of next week off. Yay!
( Kroney, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:25, Reply)

Nice. Shooting is good.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)

Yeah
It'll be the first time I've gone in about fifteen years. Should be fun.
( Kroney, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:36, Reply)

We went clay pigeon shooting for a mate's stag do
When he shot the last clay of the day, he wanted to wave the gun over his head like of the sandpeople in Star Wars. The boring instructor wouldn't let him.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:38, Reply)

There is, of course, a reason for that
didn't stop me doing that same thing during laser-clays though. Even then I got dirty looks from the instructor. He didn't say anything though, because although he could have stopped me, I'd soon be back. And in greater numbers.
( Kroney, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:40, Reply)

Ha!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:41, Reply)

I am dead cool
Because I rock a mohawk, have awesome tattoos and piercings, have great legs and my arse is very gropable.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)

Have you seen Darth's pictures on his facebook?
It's like he's gone to Gok Wan and said "I wanna look like Labs, only I want it to take 3 hours every morning to get that cyber-punk look, and those ear rings must eaither be designer, or from a place with 'boutique' in the title".
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:33, Reply)

I have, and that's a cracking description!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:36, Reply)

I'm in the process of making some turkish bread
hopefully that will work ok, and be ready for the same time as the turkish bbq banquet I am creating tonight. Followed by spliffs, Wii and darts.

Surfing tomorrow. Making prog rock on Sunday/monday

coolness: I play lead guitar in a band and I'm a surfer. That's got to be pretty cool right? Right?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

On the minus side, you sport the middle section of Catweazle's beard, though.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:33, Reply)

Elec-trickery!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:33, Reply)

Great show, even better books.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:36, Reply)

that is true
I'm going to gradually make it so I look like a conquistador though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:39, Reply)

That's a good look, and will garner extra 'cool points' for sure.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:40, Reply)

Worked for Dave Navarro.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:44, Reply)

and he married carmen electra

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:45, Reply)

I had her before him.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:58, Reply)

good lad

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:58, Reply)

I only wish it was the 3D her.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:09, Reply)

You had her....and then you had him.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:09, Reply)

His goatee tickled my knackers....
..in a most delightful way.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:10, Reply)

Busy weekend
Painting kitchen and changing the light fittings. (No good at painting and terrified of electrics.)
Kids party at a friend of Mrs T's house. (Hate her bitch friend and more so her dullard spouse who likes Texas and Coldplay.)
Playing cricket. (Have not played since I was 15, and found it tedious then. I am roped in because it will be 'fun'.)
My mother is staying over on Saturday. (I don't like her - she is a nasty piece of work and we do not get on at all.)
Cooking a bouillabaisse (pain in the arse but I said I would.)

In between all these pleasures I have to smoke a big bag of 'dro, partake in a DMT ritual with an old friend, and watch an MC5 DVD courtesy of the great Mr Boyce.

Alt Q My sequinned donkey jacket - I think this could be a new fashion must-have and will be forming a band called Dexy's Midnight Bummers at some point in the near future.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Cum on Alfie
Could be your closing number.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:33, Reply)

I have been singing "Queeno" since you suggested that.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:43, Reply)

You will LOVE that DVD.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:37, Reply)

I am rigid with anticipation.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:52, Reply)

Don't forget the special features.
That should be easy for you, seeing as you yourself have 'special features' that only a mother could love.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:56, Reply)

Care to edit that, smart-arse?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:59, Reply)

Yes, I rather think I will.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:10, Reply)

Good - now where were we?
Ah yes - abuse.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:11, Reply)

FFS make sure you pull the light fuse out or switch off the circuit breaker.
Do not rely on the light switch. draw a picture of the connections on the old fitting before you take any wires out.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:37, Reply)

FFS make sure you pull the light fuse out or switch off the circuit breaker Do the electrical stuff on DMT.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:40, Reply)

I could play Danger UXB!!!!!
Classic plan Monters.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:42, Reply)

Or watch Juggernaut.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:46, Reply)

You're dull
Use a knife and wear metal gloves, and try touching wires together to see what happens.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:40, Reply)

I'm only dull when I know what I'm talking about.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:47, Reply)

So you're never dull, then?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:10, Reply)

and stand in a bucket of water with a foil hat on.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:59, Reply)

To stop the CIA sending messages to the brain?
Whoa - good idea.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:03, Reply)

Thanks for the tip.
I really am shit scared of this type of thing.
The last time I did electrics I had indulged in a calming "wake 'n' bake" for breakfast; problem was I was so chilled I checked the fusebox about six times before getting scared and going for a walk.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:41, Reply)

Look here:
www.diydoctor.org.uk/projects/replacelightfitting.htm
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:50, Reply)

Thanks for that.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:53, Reply)

I'm cool because people always ask me for advice
I have no idea why, the highlight of my "life experience" was the time I found a normal crisp in a packet of Skips.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:46, Reply)

What flavour was it?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:48, Reply)

I think it was a cheese and onion flavour Disco
Do you remember discos? they were round.

I also once had a solid chocolate Kit Kat but I kind of missed the wafer.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:50, Reply)

Cool.
I once found a massive lump of flavouring in a bag of Cheesy Wotsits - what a rush that was.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:51, Reply)

Whoa there neddy...
i'm not sure I would have been up for that much excitement. You sound like one of those people that takes things too far.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:57, Reply)

Don't leave it like that.
I thought we had something special!
YOU'RE GONNA DIE MOTHERFUCKER.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:00, Reply)

salt and vinegar Discos are really fucking vinegary.
Strongest of all was 80s Sainsbury's own brand crisps - they were fucking HARDCORE.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:55, Reply)

Remember 'Fish n Chips'?
They were lovely.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:57, Reply)

Oh yeah...
Mucho mingey.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:02, Reply)

Salt & Vinegar is too hardcore for me full-stop
no sir-ee. You sound like you were one of those kids who put hula-hoops on the end of your fingers...mummy warned me about such people.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:59, Reply)

Ooh salt and vinegar when you've had too many and you're sweating and your tongue is white

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:00, Reply)

Sounds like bukkake night at a chip shop.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:12, Reply)

the old 'salt and vinegar strokes'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:16, Reply)

you're all dirty bastards

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:18, Reply)

Did someone call?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:36, Reply)

ODB!
"I'm immune to all viruses; I get that cocaine, it cleans out my sinuses."
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:40, Reply)

One of the best/funniest live performers I have ever seen.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 14:01, Reply)

HEY! DIRTAY!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:51, Reply)