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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Top 3 thread - Sorry Gonz
These are the top three b3tans I would like to kick in the nuts.

1. Bert Monkey Sex
2. Al The Geordie
3. Jeff The Poodle Penetrator

Who would you like to kick in the nuts and why?

(this is purely for jest, apart from Bert, I think I would actualy like to kick him in the nuts)
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 13:55, 253 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
None, I'm not a violent wanker.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 13:57, Reply)
slowly, slowly spanky-monkey

(IMTDSNINVU is better tahn all of you, especially you, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 13:57, Reply)
Shut up, Bert

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 13:58, Reply)
I don't get it?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:00, Reply)
if you don't wank violently
you would be spanking the monkey slowly
(IMTDSNINVU is better tahn all of you, especially you, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:02, Reply)
Welcome back Bert.
we haven't missed you.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:03, Reply)
Oh now I get it,
so who are you? Are you bert?
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:03, Reply)
yeah it's him
He has mispelt Than in his sig on purpose as he got such a hard on last time when people told him he was making mistakes. He is predictable now, every couple of weeks he will turn up.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:04, Reply)
I think a quick tweet to Cr3 is in order - leave it with me...

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:06, Reply)
Do we have to go telling tales to Cr3?
I get the impression he's fed up with us enough as it is...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:07, Reply)
^this

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)
I wouldn't normally but some of the personal things Bert has said about others (that were not his business to share) were really bang out of order

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:09, Reply)
See below - it was him.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Fairy nuff
I think I'm just a little concerned that we're getting a reputation as a cliquey, whinging corner of b3ta that seems to be on 24-hour Bert Alert. I know it's natural for the various boards to look down on one another, and so we get derided as such, but I just think we're better than that.

Obviously, I don't disagree with the argument that Bert really has been an insufferable cunt. All things considered, you probably did the right thing.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:14, Reply)
I agree with the points made above
but also have no desire to see B3ta play host to Bert's kind. OT is already reputed to be cliquey because anyone new who turns up invariably cops a fuckload of abuse, and only a few people stick around long enough to realise this isn't unique to newbies
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:18, Reply)
Meh, the same could be said of /talk
And I agree, the place is better when we don't have to constantly contend with Bert's latest incarnation.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:19, Reply)
Talk is much worse than OT
Anyway, as Vipros said myself and Bobby are examples of people who barged in and dealt with the brickbats
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:23, Reply)
You are a classic example of someone who survived the hazing process
No thanks to myself, you big bumder, you.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Yeah but your version of hazing was fucking hilarious

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:46, Reply)
As I've said above
I wouldn't normally get involved but some of the things Bert shared were inexcusable. Plus he came back to troll not to participate. I agree with your point about being viewed as cliquey - all boards have an element of that but that doesn't mean any of us should encourage it.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:18, Reply)
what do you mean getting a reputation
this is clique city. Not a bad thing just makes it tougher for newbies. Bert is a special case imo and just exacerbates the situation.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:18, Reply)
cr3 already considers offtopic inbred
www.b3ta.com/cr3/
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:20, Reply)
/OT's no different to /talk
Just as cliquey, but perseverance and not being a complete mentalist will see you through.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:21, Reply)
Where?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:23, Reply)
read about 4 lines of text.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Spotted it hahahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:35, Reply)
^ It was, in fact, this that prompted my original post.
Just to clarify: I'm as glad as the rest of you to be shot of Bert. I don't think his trolling has been at all amusing of late, and his swipes at people have just been far too personal, even for a website that pitches its humour at the level it does.

I just want to make sure we don't develop into the 'special child' of all the boards who goes running in tears to Cr3 when somebody comes back to bully us again. We can stand up for ourselves. Though obviously, Bert is a particularly special class of cunt. Anyone who's going to try this hard to troll one board so persistently must have a hell of a problem.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
I agree and wouldn't have contacted a mod if it had been someone else who had previously been banned.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Don't get me wrong; I think ultimately it was a good call!

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:31, Reply)
^agree with this
Bert is a special case, but there aren't really many things that ever require mod intervention
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
/talk was all over that shit with Bou though
and I'm sure it's the same on board and links
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:22, Reply)
Ah, I heard about Bou, though I never found out quite what he did
to get the whole of South Africa barred from b3ta.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:25, Reply)
a she I think
and there was a lot of stuff
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:28, Reply)
She, threatened to have people killed
posted peoples home addresses, and had cyber sex with gonz.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:30, Reply)
Christ...
Suddenly it all makes sense.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:32, Reply)
what what WHAT?!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:32, Reply)
gonz posted webcam pics of her getting naked.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:34, Reply)
srly?

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:34, Reply)
srs

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:36, Reply)
Was it soul-searingly horrific?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:37, Reply)
NW!

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:37, Reply)
Wasn't there a bit of racism thrown in as well?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Yeah, well defending a racist who she also had cyber sex with
the infamous syncubus.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:36, Reply)
I wandered over to good board this morning - considerably less people than I expected - about 5.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:40, Reply)
Wasn't she just wholesale mental?
Before I ever signed up, I think, although I was lurking at the time. Also, hello you. How did your Very Important Meeting go? (well, I assume it was important..)
(berk, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Not bad, in the end
My supervisor and I were rather worried that, during our talks, there'd be the audible sound of a barrel being scraped. Fortunately we soon realised that nobody else had made much progress in the last few months either, which was a relief. So, quite a tiring day (they always are) but not nearly as painful as I thought it was going to be.

To celebrate this fact I am off to buy a(nother) guitar.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:34, Reply)
I don't think he will.
not for a while at least.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:06, Reply)
just a sensitive rapist
it's just a bit of fun Chompy. Smile, you might like it.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 13:58, Reply)
I'm sorry
here have some hot asian chicks to calm you down.
www.tomshardware.com/picturestory/558-go-oc-2010-overclocking-babes.html#xtor=RSS-182
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 13:59, Reply)
posts like this make me, a serious sex offender look down upon the likes of you, creepy internet pervs

(IMTDSNINVU is better tahn all of you, especially you, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:04, Reply)
just go and fuck your sister again and leave us all in peace you odious little cunt.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)
I am actually glad he is back as I might get the spotlight off me now
Jeff is a cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)
You make me cry.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:25, Reply)

cry hard
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:31, Reply)
That post makes me think you're actually wormulus pretending to be bert.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)
I actually think it's you pretending to be wormulus pretending to be bert.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:09, Reply)
Cr3 has replied - it was Bert and he's just banned him again.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Fuck, that was quick!

(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:12, Reply)
The joys of Twitter

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:13, Reply)
Yes, the joys
Now I know your real name and what you look like :)
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:19, Reply)
So do Crimewatch.
I'm not that bothered about hiding my identify - I posted a link to an article on Yahoo the other day about the Moyles campaign that had my name all over it.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:21, Reply)
True
And I didn't mean to sound all "Now I have power over you!" :)
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:22, Reply)
I know.
you fucking stalker
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Haha!
I just wanted to see cr3 confirm it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:25, Reply)

so should I now watch out for you following stalking me on Twatter?
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Nah
I rarely use it. Only set up my account to stalk Trent Reznor do some testing at work.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:31, Reply)
I enjoy Twitter - I used another account /SohoStreets to get the Moyles thing going - I don't think that campaign would have happened without Twitter

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:36, Reply)
Obvious but fair
not
violent

and just because it no longer fits

None
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:04, Reply)
Only one of my three least favourite B3tans is male
So I'll give you three men who have no right to be allowed the use of their penis ever again, having horribly abused this greatest of all gifts.

1. Ashley Cole
2. Michael McIntyre's father
3. Me
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)
One of your least favorite B3tans is male?
Well I can guess who one of the females is but not the other. We're all fabulous.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:10, Reply)
I'm intrigued as to where your guess lies
Gaz me if you'd prefer not to say in a public forum
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:12, Reply)
WHAT
I'm fairly certain I like those three.

can we have an alt q because I'm not going to tell you my list
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Only one is serious
just tongue in cheek to remove eyes from Jeff the bastards thread below.

How did your night go in the end?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:13, Reply)
it was rather shit
she's all 'are you mad at me?' and I'm all 'no, I'm mad at myself for saying anything in the first place, I just drank too much and said too much' and she's all 'no it's okay, I don't want to lose our friendship' blahblah

oh and the ex saw the text and she CRIED
I don't know why I think this is funny
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:17, Reply)
Because tragedy is fucking hilarious and life goes on
Fuck it K Swiss you are big girl.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:19, Reply)
I'm FINE
ugh
I just feel the incessant need to get wasted
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:20, Reply)

Thursdays are the new Fridays
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:21, Reply)
I can't get wasted though
just a little drunk

not that I should, that's how I got into this whole mess anyway
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:23, Reply)
Post your phone to yourself now so it arrives tomorrow morning
when you're sober again!
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
hahahaha
clever!
I'm just going to take my rage out on it.
Make it really hurt.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
This is a great idea!!
I like it!
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:35, Reply)
You. Three times.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:16, Reply)
I love you

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:20, Reply)
He really does

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:20, Reply)
you're not too bad either gorgeous

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:22, Reply)
I know
Also; you are Aberracion AICMFP
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Ola!
comme est ta?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:29, Reply)
That beaker who keeps changing his name
BobbyPieres
BobbyP
Bobbywhatevah

Complete spanner
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:21, Reply)
Anything beginning with
bob
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:22, Reply)
Or Kate.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Or Al

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:28, Reply)
Kate?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Blackadder reference

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Shit of course!
Am desperately trying to remember the line about something interesting being in her trousers.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:35, Reply)
He had a cunting plan?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:11, Reply)
*prescribes course of leeches*

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:29, Reply)
Why so much hate, young one?
Have they done anything to you to deserve your fire? And even if they have, wouldn't you be happier by just ignoring them?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
It's only tongue in cheek
apart from Bert.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Hmm, who would I kick
1) Kelvin MacKenzie - This is why
2) Russell Brand - Partially so I can steal his missus, mainly so I can hurt him.
3) My boss - He's a tosser.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Jesus, Kelvin MacKenzie
is a monumental cunt
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:29, Reply)
What a turd of a man!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:29, Reply)
AA's a lovely fellow - how dare you?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:22, Reply)
Agreed on Russell Brand
but I think his missus may now be beyond the point of disinfectant
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:31, Reply)
I've got large amounts of acetone and ethanol in the lab, if that would help?

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Nah, your limp wrists can't support all that liquid(?)
You'd only end up spilling it down yourself
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:47, Reply)
I love the smell of acetone
can I have some?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:47, Reply)
Do you?
Cocaine's full of it.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I believe it was the great Richard Pryor who said of cocaine
"I just really like the way it smells"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:59, Reply)
I love Richard Pryor so, so much.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:00, Reply)
OOH NUT KICKING!
Lab
AL IM GOING TO GET YOU AL IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME YOU FUCK
I don't believe bobby has nuts as he cries like a little girl so instead i'm going for.... *drumroll*

AL AGAIN!
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:28, Reply)
I'll gaz you a pic!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:29, Reply)
whatevs edmund

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:31, Reply)

pet badger cuddle
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Ed's back!

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:38, Reply)
You won't kick me in the nuts
Who'd make you white russians? HUH?!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:35, Reply)
These are not b3tans.
Gok Bleeding Wan
Bruce Forsyth
And, finally, Bernie fucking Ecclestone.

And Shane Ritchie.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:39, Reply)
These 3 non B3tans:
Peter Mandelson
Peter Mandelson
Peter Mandleson.

I would rather slice his gonads off with a chainsaw than merely kick him in them.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 14:44, Reply)
i've never kicked anyone in my life
can i use my new boxing gloves instead? in which case... where do i start...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:04, Reply)
You could use the ball sack as a speed-ball.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:24, Reply)
OUCH!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:25, Reply)
I think I would kick
Bert (obviously)
AmBadge for being so superior when he's exactly the same as everyone else
TGB for calling me interchangeable.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:08, Reply)
i can't believe bert
tried again. there are Issues there.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:17, Reply)
How sick is he?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:18, Reply)
Hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:22, Reply)
I know, it's really quite sad
I don't really get the point of trolling anyway, but when you're not even trolling properly it's just sad.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:21, Reply)
It's that he keeps coming back with a different account
And gets found out within a day.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:21, Reply)
he didn't even try and hide it this time
which, I suppose, is slightly better than the whole Cat Hater thing. Reading his posts where he wrote "who is this Bert?" are just cringeworthy.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:22, Reply)
I bet he loves being accused of being Bert
It's like validating the guy's existence.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:24, Reply)
I bet he loves being repeatedly called a nonce slightly less so.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:26, Reply)
That's the thing isn't it. Maybe he is getting the last laugh somehow?
I can't see how but sometimes I wonder, I wa wa wa wonder.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:26, Reply)
There is nothing to stop him lurking, so the best thing to do is to move on and not satisfy his ego by not talking about him

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:30, Reply)
good shout, agreed

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:31, Reply)
well yeah I do think he oddly enjoys all the conversations like this
where we discuss his mental problems and slag him off, but it's probably short-lived validation when we move onto something else and he has nothing else in his life to entertain him.

I used to love Del Shannon's voice. Fit.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:30, Reply)
He was fucking brilliant.
Up there with Dion.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:34, Reply)
What if he is really normal and all this is just a game to him?
I doubt it but I have been moody irl because of him and that worries me.

Best old fashioned voice for me is Billie Holliday. She was not fit.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:35, Reply)
it's possible
trolls do enjoy being dicks for the sake of it, but this is bordering on obsession.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:37, Reply)
it's just weird
to enjoy upsetting people or making them angry in my opinion.

i'd never do that. well, not online anyway. it's no fun if you can't see their eyes well up behind their coke-bottle thick glasses.

old fashioned voices? anyone who sounds like they have 50 toffees up their noses or plums in their mouths makes me gush at the gash.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:42, Reply)
In person trolling can be a laugh as you can visually see if someone get's upset
but to reveal personal stuff that you know is gonna hurt someone online is weird. It removes any element of banter from the equation and just confirms you're a cunt. Well that's what I think.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:44, Reply)

gush at the gash wank myself silly in my SLK
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:47, Reply)
i've given a blowie in it
does that count?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:48, Reply)
Excellent work. A lorry driver?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:51, Reply)
I'm not, no.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:52, Reply)
we'd have to put the roof down
to accommodate your massive schlong, darling
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:57, Reply)
^ facts, online.
You're going to have to trade your car in for an ex-Russian Army missile carrier if we're going to make this work.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:00, Reply)
i'll just have to turn you on a bit less
what is the opposite of viagara?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:20, Reply)
Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.
Get a little figurine and dangle it from the rear-view mirror.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:22, Reply)
Those guys with the squeegees accept change too.

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:53, Reply)
maybe
but the rose-seller didn't.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:58, Reply)
Woo! Go trolls!

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:46, Reply)
I had him on his first ever post with his latest login.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:23, Reply)
so did everyone
But have a slow round of applause anyway

clap




clap




clap
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:24, Reply)
You've got the clap?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:25, Reply)
caught it from your mum

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:26, Reply)
he's gone now, that's all that matters.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:26, Reply)
FOR NOW!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:27, Reply)
The brand you're referring to in your sig is one of the ones I used to manage - tru (dull) fax

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:29, Reply)
I do love that brand of drinks
It's no Rio but a good alternate.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:37, Reply)
It's a Coca-Cola Company brand - but only available in the UK. I know. Amazing. Your life is now complete.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:38, Reply)

complete shitter
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:39, Reply)
It's just so obvious though
he signposts it so someone will work it out. Like spelling than wrong in his sig.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:24, Reply)
whatevs LAK

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:24, Reply)
It's BLAK now
get it right.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:25, Reply)
YOu're not cool enough to be in LAK

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:27, Reply)
I'm not in LAK
I'm in BLAK.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:28, Reply)
Giving yourself airs there, chap.
You're not punchy, pole-y or slutty enough to qualify. You can be in BLAND.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:29, Reply)
he's an honourary member because TGB was being the pit bull to his little child's face.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)
I think it's time I stood on my own two feet. And resign my honourary post.
Thankyou for your infinite patience and kindness. I will come back my own man.

*walks off into distance looking magnificent rapey*
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:33, Reply)
A pit bull to his face would be a drastic improvement
And you don't decide who get's to be in LAK.

If you allow him in then Amberl has to go back in too
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:34, Reply)
You're not the boss of me
We reformed LAK under our own terms; the only requirement for entry is to hate you. So far we've got over 5,000 members.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:36, Reply)
Awesome
Do you have "We hate TGB" badges? Is there a newletter?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:37, Reply)
I'm so making those badges

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:41, Reply)
I'm so buying a few dozen

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:42, Reply)
Awesome
Can I have one please
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:43, Reply)
If it's good enough Labs I'll get the fucker tattooed on me
TRUFAX
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:45, Reply)
No you won't

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:46, Reply)
Wanna bet
If I get it done, and I can guarantee there are no little hidden Bobby is a cunt bits, you have to pay for it. Deal?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:48, Reply)
This is a bad idea
This is not cool. You are making a fool of yourself online.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:49, Reply)
You make all these assumptions about me and then apply your
'online' rules. I couldn't care less about having a shitty tattoo that will make me laugh for ages.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:50, Reply)
I'm sure you'll spot
tnuc a si ybboB
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:49, Reply)
Hahah

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:57, Reply)
Rather that than
tnuc a sah ybboB
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:00, Reply)
We Hate Badger Badges
love it
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:43, Reply)
Hmm
"I hate TGB" or "I hate Badger"?
I prefer the former, but the latter has a surreal charm to it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:47, Reply)
I don't want Mighty or Amorous thinking it's about them
Mighty because I like him and Amorous because he already thinks has a weird ego over stuff like that.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:48, Reply)
Doubt I can fit
"I lost my other badge in TGB's vagina" on a 25mm badge.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:50, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:58, Reply)
Just have we hate this badger
and a picture of my face
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:49, Reply)
The newsletter would be a bit dull
Update: Still Hating The Badger
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:47, Reply)
You could have my best quotes
Best retorts
Person who angered badger the most through blind stupidity (bobs pretty much got that one covered)
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:52, Reply)
sounds like you have your own newsletter already
and you just want an excuse to send it out...
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:59, Reply)
Of course I do
It's all about ME
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:01, Reply)
says potato face over there in the corner.
I've resigned.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:36, Reply)
Shame I was enjoying being in a pretend internet letters group.
Best be miserable now I'm not allowed.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)
Maybe he has stupendous norks?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:34, Reply)
and they have man hair on them!
Alright Z
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:36, Reply)
Put those away!
Alright Bobble?
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:41, Reply)
course, it's poker night.
You missed Bert pop in earlier. Banned again now. What's new?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:43, Reply)
I didn't miss it
just watched it unfold with a tedious inevitability. There's no point getting in a flap every time he appears. I'm sure he finds it very amusing.

Poker night? Cheating or no cheating?
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:49, Reply)
No cheating anymore
I have realised there is no need now with this lot. Honestly by 9pm everyone is so stoned it's just an endurance game.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:53, Reply)
Ha!
That's what I've found too, everyone just gets impatient and makes really dumb calls. You just have to resist the urge to join them.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:56, Reply)
I lose patience when
people don't know what's going on and each hand takes 15 minutes.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:59, Reply)
WAIT
I just realised you said we were slutty. I strongly object!

If you'd said 'slow on the uptake' then I would have no comeback.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:03, Reply)
I think L brings your average into slutty quite comfortably

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:06, Reply)
One of you isn't pole-y, two of you (I hope) aren't punchy, I'll let you be the judge of how many of you deserve the slutty tag.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:08, Reply)
phew safe.
Except from the other members of LAK, who I've just called slutty.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 16:35, Reply)
you must eat so many lemons
because you are so BITT-AR!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:33, Reply)
You must eat so many pugs
because you are so BIT-CHY!
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:36, Reply)
I would never eat a pug
it would ruin my chances with Donkey Gums.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 15:42, Reply)

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