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I Did A Stupid Thing Friday!
Right, so - I have signed up to do the following over 7 days next year:
1) Climb Snowdon
2) Cycle to Scafell Pike
3) Climb Scafell Pike
4) Cycle to Ben Nevis
5) Climb Ben Nevis
And all in aid of Help for Heroes - yeah, yeah, whatever.
The next 10 months of training will be fun. What other stupid things should I sign up to do next year?
Alt Q: Tell me about your amazing acts of heroism/endurance/laziness...
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:15,
174 replies,
latest was 15 years ago)
The Army
then you can give them some help in Iraqistan
(
Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:16,
Reply)
No, I happen to be allergic to being shot at...
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:17,
Reply)
Shirker
back in the Great War we had a word for people like you..."Irish"
(
Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:20,
Reply)
Sure and begorrah!
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:23,
Reply)
What, the same Great War where about 50,000 Irish people died, eh?
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:29,
Reply)
Would not want to be you right now Drac.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:31,
Reply)
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?
None
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
Sad times, etc.
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:34,
Reply)
I was told that in a pub in a dodgy part of Derry by my 2/3/4 cousins or something,
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:36,
Reply)
Is that near Londonderry?
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:36,
Reply)
Where?
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:39,
Reply)
ha ha,
I just checked google maps they've decided to call it.
"londonderry/derry"
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:41,
Reply)
incitement to Irish hatred right here Monty
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:39,
Reply)
Yeah it's just down that way
*points over your shoulder*
*waits for you to turn round*
*bottles*
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:39,
Reply)
That's what happens when you fight for the Hun!
WW1 is almost an obsession for me, I know what the Irish volunteers did for Britain and the danger they faced when they returned to Ireland. Please take my comments in the jest they were meant to be
(
Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:36,
Reply)
Don'tworry, I'm not offended, your kneecaps are safe
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:38,
Reply)
Why do you think we call it the Great War? Durrr.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:36,
Reply)
I ran for a bus once.
Then I realised that there would be another one along shortly, so I sat on a bench and had a fag.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:18,
Reply)
Winner
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:21,
Reply)
Help for Heroes is a cunt of a charity.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:18,
Reply)
Becuz all soldiers is murdererz innit?
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:19,
Reply)
Spend too much money lobbying,
dismissive of almost any critisim of the army,
pay out money in a bizarre way,
but most of all, they use words like "our boys" "these blokes" etc in offical press releases, they can fuck right off.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:22,
Reply)
You could level two of those arguements against PETA too
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25,
Reply)
Can't stand PETA
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25,
Reply)
More like PITA
amirite?
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:26,
Reply)
I like Greek flatbreads though.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:26,
Reply)
Well they're even worse cunts.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25,
Reply)
those cunts
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25,
Reply)
I get a little bit pissed off with being bombarded with 'spam' charity post, to be honest.
Stop wasting money printing begging letters, and posting them out with a little pen so we can fill in the handy direct debit form, and spend the money on the actual fucking research / charitable objectives. Had Cancer Research et al not spunked a chunck of cash raised on manufacturing shitty little pens, who knows where we'd be by now?
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:29,
Reply)
I hate the cunts who come door to door
not just charity people actually, anyone who comes to my door. or anywhere near me.
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:33,
Reply)
*goes home dejectedly*
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:53,
Reply)
The Red Cross are so bad for this!
I donated to Haiti on a whim and I'm sure they've spent more than what I donated in sending me cards and address stickers and stuff, it's well annoying.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:45,
Reply)
Dog's Trust is another.
Look, just take the bloody money and build more accommodation for abandoned dogs, OK? Don't waste the money sending me a fucking photo and birthday / Christmas cards from the dog I 'adopted' every year, because, frankly, I'm well aware that dogs can't write, let alone have any cognitive recognition of specific dates in the year in the first place.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:48,
Reply)
Red Cross sent me a bunch of pictures of African kids yesterday
Wiggy opened it and I said I didn't want to look at them so he spread them out on the floor in front of me. Douche.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:53,
Reply)
Can't you just donate them a sledge hammer,
that and a bit of hard work and the abandonned dogs are no longer a problem.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:55,
Reply)
I don't actually donate to them
just making a point.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:59,
Reply)
Yes, but PETA really properly are cunts
(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:40,
Reply)
didn't they stage some of those animal abuse situations?
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:43,
Reply)
Apparently so
It's the basic hypocrisy that gets me, plus the complete misunderstanding of how animal drug trials work.
That and the fact they are utter, utter cunts.
(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:22,
Reply)
One of them spat on me once.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:44,
Reply)
I was told to fuck off
by one woman who wanted to ban vivisection
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:46,
Reply)
I was walking past one of their stands with a mate
and he said "ha ha you tested animals didn't you?"
I was spat on when I walked away. Nice guys.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:48,
Reply)
There were some animal rights folks trying to protest outside the Institute of Neurology
but unfortunately they missed and instead spent a couple of hours shouting slogans just outside the gastroenterology ward at Great Ormond Street. Mongs.
(
wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:48,
Reply)
I seriously don't understand this one, chompo
what's wrong with doing a little something to help support medical rehabilitation for young guys that have been badly injured in the service of this country?
Yadda yadda, illegal war, etc.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:22,
Reply)
Nothing at all, good for you,
I just don't like the charity.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:23,
Reply)
See, that's fair enough!
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:26,
Reply)
This^
Kinda.
If my life was to expire whilst
doing my fucking job, then gutted. I'm dead.
I see nothing 'heroic' about being in the army. It's a job that these people have signed up for, being fully aware of the risks involved.
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:23,
Reply)
Yeah, but:
if someone loses a limb doing
what they've been told to do, they deserve support - as you would get if you lost a limb at work by way of being able to sue your employer.
I do agree that the term 'Hero' is bandied around too much, though.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25,
Reply)
It's just that.
It's the 'Hero' tag that gets me.
I'd happily support ANYONE who was injured at work - fuck it, it doesn't get much worse than losing a couple of limbs and being peppered with shrapnel, but it doesn't make you a hero.
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:27,
Reply)
I tell you what really grinds my gears:
Why do the red tops have to capitalise our boys? Will 'The Army' not do?
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:29,
Reply)
I knocked my funnybone on a door frame once.
Man it hurt. However, I managed to not spill everyone's coffee from the tray so I reckon that makes me a workplace hero.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:31,
Reply)
It does in my eyes...
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:35,
Reply)
I didn't get any support though.
Let alone a charity set up in the name of all those office monkeys that have been horribly injured in the cause of duty.
I once got scratched in an incident concerning a rusty staple and a staple remover, Colonel, and where was my country when I needed it? Masturbating over topless page 3 stunnas giving 'Our Boys' some moral support at Catterick, that's where!
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:40,
Reply)
It could be the When Things Get Knocked Over Or Fall Out Of Cupboards charity
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:46,
Reply)
Now this is something I've heard, but couldn't find a report on it at the moment
but some london hospital asked for a grant to help make a mental health center which would help with post traumatic stress for soldiers, but they wouldn't help because less than 50% of the people helped would be soldiers.
It still had capacity to treat every soldier in the area with PTSD but that didn't matter apparently.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:28,
Reply)
If that's true, it's bloody ridiculous.
I still think that supporting troops who've been injured in service is really important, though.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:30,
Reply)
I bet they kick cats when they walk past as well.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:52,
Reply)
Do the Marathon des Sables
If you want to impress me.
Not that your mission doesn't already impress me. You mental.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:19,
Reply)
I just googled that and my anus fell out.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:21,
Reply)
The old mayor of my town ran it
Utterly mental.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:22,
Reply)
athon +quis
s bles +de
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:22,
Reply)
He's been dead a while
But I'm sure he'd love it if you dug him up for one more go at it.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:23,
Reply)
I bet he would
plus that would be properly impressive
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:26,
Reply)
I'm fucking rubbish...
...because I've never put my fitness to test by doing any of those things - aside from climbing Snowdon.
You can cycle the bridleways at Snowdon between October and April, I'm told the descent into Llanberis from the top of the narrow guage railway is an adrenaline rush.
I must do something mental on a bike in aid of Diabetes UK.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:23,
Reply)
I appear to have signed up to do 'Toughguy' in January.
Ooops
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25,
Reply)
Jesus christ
Now that is hardcore...
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:26,
Reply)
I'm really not prepared for it either.
I ran a 5k the other day as part of my 'training' (that's all I've done so far) and I nearly died...
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:50,
Reply)
You're going to die
And it won't be a noble death, but you won't be alone.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:29,
Reply)
What a way to go though
:D
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:50,
Reply)
You appear to be an idiot
Why run through nettles? And what were those things people were climbing through that appeared to be giving them shocks?
(
PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:49,
Reply)
It's electric fence wire, draped over a climbing frame.
The only reason I'm doing it is that I've had rather a shitty shit shit year, have achieved none of the things I set out to do and want to prove (to myself) that I
can do anything I set my mind to.
I'm hoping that knowledge may help a little.
(
Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:12,
Reply)
There's a lovely half-marathon on Inishbofin
where you have to set off in pairs to run round the island. That's my race for next year, I think.
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:26,
Reply)
Is this like a three-legged race?
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:27,
Reply)
That would be awesome.
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:30,
Reply)
Pushing a pram?
Would that count?
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:27,
Reply)
I'd be in pole position with my Maclaren Techno XT.
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:30,
Reply)
You need an aero-helmet for mini-CHCB
The streamlining is very important.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:31,
Reply)
Shiny Lycra babygros FTW.
(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
if they're lycra does that mean they're stretchy enough to fit Catface?
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:51,
Reply)
i have bullied rakky
into agreeing that we can organise a bash next year at some point.
you could sign up for that? brave AND stupid!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:27,
Reply)
Hah, you know I'd be coming to that.
I haven't seen or heard of Rakky for
yonks.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:28,
Reply)
How is she?
She's just as hilarious in person as she is online. I've a lot of time for Rakky.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:29,
Reply)
i am going to see her new flat soon
can't wait for a night out, we always manage to find some sort of trouble and then get in the middle of it. she is brilliant!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:35,
Reply)
She is all of the ace!
Having met the pair of you I would love to be a fly on the wall when you two are out on the town.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:36,
Reply)
yes
rakky-rswipe is a dangerous combination!
anyway you and h would be top of the invite list, natch.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:40,
Reply)
Thank you!
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:41,
Reply)
Are you going to take her your unwanted green gym thingy as a house warming gift?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:37,
Reply)
no because
it's actually quite cool.
pink would have been better, but you know.
also you would have died laughing if you'd seen me spending hours putting my punchbag together last night. it took me about 100 trips with the kettle to fill the base with water. at about 1am. ridiculous. but hey, it works brilliantly now. my arms are killing me!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:41,
Reply)
Could you not just use sand to fill the base?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:58,
Reply)
yes but
i live in a second storey flat in kensington. where would i get sand from?? the shops near me sell chilli extra virgin oil and hand roasted almonds at midnight, not SAND.
i could have waited for my dad to bring some down from the garden centre in wilmslow, but i didn't know how much to ask him to buy.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:02,
Reply)
Never mind.
Could you not have sent your concierge out to do your bidding?
Is your hand-speed* improving?
*That is a boxing, not wanking question.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:06,
Reply)
I'll bet a Swipe bash
Would require first-class air travel and pink champagne.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:30,
Reply)
the savoy re-opens this weekend
it's a possible venue!
no, i would probably get one of my clients who owns a [well known chain of] pubs to give us an area and free food.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:35,
Reply)
If you're going for an area
I'd suggest you ask your client for the county of Kent. It always looks quite nice when I've been there.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:37,
Reply)
I didn't know you knew J D Wetherspoon
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:47,
Reply)
intimately
i have no standards
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:50,
Reply)
I wouldn't choose the Savoy if I were you.
I designed most of the air conditioning and boiler controls.
(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:50,
Reply)
really??
so how much of the leap from projected budget of £100M to the actual spend of £220M was your fault, eh??
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:51,
Reply)
About £100,000
The original project just escalated. It wasn't my personal fault, nor my company's we just made the most of what was offered.
(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:04,
Reply)
i am excited to see it actually
we are going next week
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:16,
Reply)
It does look swish. They showed it on the news last night.
I may do the afternoon tea thing next year. If I start saving now.
(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:19,
Reply)
Provisional sign up from me.
If only to witness Rakky falling over from laughter again.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
*starts thinking*
(
wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:45,
Reply)
*buys Welsh dictionary and starts storing ejaculate*
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:50,
Reply)
What training will you be doing?
Taking the stairs rather than the lift in work is the closest I can think of as perparation for this sort of challenge.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:29,
Reply)
Well:
I cycle (at the moment) 90+ miles a week, and run 8k three times a week. I guess I'll stick with what I'm doing, just ramp up the distances...
*naive*
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
You're fitter than me.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
You can sod right off.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:33,
Reply)
I don't cycle 90 miles a week!
The most I do is circa 75-80, plus I haven't run since I got this cold two weeks ago.
:-(
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:35,
Reply)
I have half a feeling you could still beat me
I didn't say I did it
fast! :) I'm still carrying about 5lbs too much!
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:36,
Reply)
I'm carrying 10lb too much!
Seriously, you'd smoke me.
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:38,
Reply)
How about we stop blowing smoke up each other's asses?
You'd cream me. CREAM ME, YOU HEAR?
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:39,
Reply)
Race?
For charity. It's not like you've got much on over the next 12 months...
runs
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:40,
Reply)
You've got the runs?
It's probably those satsumas again.
I won't race you. The quivering wreck I would become would not be a pretty sight.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:45,
Reply)
Just like to say, chaps,
that this is the gayest subthread in the entire history of the internet. Possibly even longer than that.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:47,
Reply)
You can be my wingman anytime DiT
Volleyball anyone?
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:48,
Reply)
Don't think that by being funny you can get away with it either.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:49,
Reply)
Upon reflection...
...it does look a tad incriminating doesn't it?
(
Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:51,
Reply)
A soupcon, yes.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:53,
Reply)
It wasn't so much a hint as a party political broadcast...
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:56,
Reply)
Ahahaha!
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:07,
Reply)
You two are really 'flying the flag' for equality and understanding

(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:00,
Reply)
Bullshit, you can be mine.
*volleyballs*
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:51,
Reply)
you want him so bad
it's like acid in your mouth
Second most homoerotic movie ever
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:52,
Reply)
They're called 'films' in this country.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:59,
Reply)
They're called whatever I choose to call them
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:00,
Reply)
No they're not.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:08,
Reply)
they bloody well are
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:11,
Reply)
says the guy who says sneakers
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:03,
Reply)
Says the woman who says 'guy'
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:04,
Reply)
My friends think I'm odd because I still say that I'm going to the pictures.
It's not the movies, it's just not.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:06,
Reply)
Pictures What The Butler Saw machine.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:08,
Reply)
*breaks out the zoetrope*
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:08,
Reply)
Well done you
*shakes hand*
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:08,
Reply)
It could be worse, I suppose.
I could say 'Talkies' or "MAGIC LIGHT MACHINE PROJECTING LOST SOULS ON TO THE STICKY WALLS OF A FLEA PIT TIME!"
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:11,
Reply)
I'm not being sarcastic!
I love archaic terminology and use it wherever I can.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:24,
Reply)
Like we hadn't noticed.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:27,
Reply)
walking to the end of the drive to take out the rubbish
instead of using one of those mobility scooters
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:33,
Reply)
hahaha
Brilliant.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:33,
Reply)
*wobbles*
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:40,
Reply)
I gave a homeless man my beer money once
(
Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:31,
Reply)
you should have cut out the middle man and just given him some beer
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
what? fuck nah was I gonna waste my gas going to the store to buy him beer
he can walk his ass down the road and get it himself
(
Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:38,
Reply)
it's not like he's got anything else to do
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:48,
Reply)
If a homeless person ever has the cojones
to admit he wants the money for drink and/or drugs my brother will give them some. The old 'night shelter/feed my dog' schtick gets them nothing.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:46,
Reply)
I hate when scrotes come up to you with a bollocks story about how they lost their bus money
and they just need 20p for the phone, so if you go to get your wallet out they say "oh could you make it 50p" and if you say ok they ask for £1, etc. Cunts.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:49,
Reply)
I hate it when scrotes come up to you. The end.
What you have just outlined is easily avoided by glaring hatefully at everyone, all the time. No-one asks me for shit.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:52,
Reply)
I can make it shorter
I hate scrotes in general
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:53,
Reply)
concision ftw
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:56,
Reply)
Shorter still:
I hate.
(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:08,
Reply)
I have to walk past the Scientology office to get lunch
they've stopped asking me if I want a free stress test.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:03,
Reply)
pfft
that's a bit like these fucking gypsys in the mall that always ask "may I see your nails??" then smother your hands in cream and try to sell you crap manicure kits
(
Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:25,
Reply)
I've never had someone come up to me but he was on the side of the road and looked crap and that never happens around here and I felt bad
(
Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:57,
Reply)
In London you get toerags trying it on all the time.
There was one chap who used to approach you in the petrol garage near my friend's house carrying a bike helmet and claiming to have had his bike nicked so he needed money to 'get back to Brixton'.
The third time he tried* it I said 'fucking hell mate this KEEPS happening to you, doesn't it?'
He remembered me after that.
*That was his THIRD mistake.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:03,
Reply)
oh I lied, I did have a bloke once come up to my friends and I, asking for a couple bucks each because he was stranded and
he needed a ride to the city, like 70 miles away, we "didn't have any cash"...he looked most displeased
(
Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:13,
Reply)
There's a woman who used to go the shelter I volunteered at
and she's lovely, she plays a guitar but she's so quiet that no one gives her money so I buy her a sammich when I see her. I want to take her home but I've been advised against it.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:04,
Reply)
Sammich?
SAMMICH? GET THEE BEHIND ME, SATAN!
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:07,
Reply)
A WHAT?
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:09,
Reply)
That's what I wondered, Monty.
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:11,
Reply)
I am still wondering now, Davvo old bean.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:23,
Reply)
Could have been worse, Monters.
She could have said samm
idge. Then where would we be?
(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:28,
Reply)
We would be in merry HELL, old boy.
THAT'S where we would be.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 18:00,
Reply)
Foolish.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:32,
Reply)
Help for Heroes
always makes me think of the band Hell Is For Heroes. I like them so I'm happy.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:31,
Reply)
I feel a bit sad for that guy in the new thread now.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:40,
Reply)
yeah me too
but I don't have an answer for it. I'll try and help.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:49,
Reply)
That's ok, he probably feels at home now.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:53,
Reply)
Help for Heroes
is an appalling red-top charidee charity. I refuse to give to them. To the extent that when my place of work had a mufti day to support them, I wore a suit and demanded that they give me money.
(
Kroney, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:08,
Reply)
Excellent use of Mufti Day, here.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:12,
Reply)
I always get looked at funny
whenever I say it. Does it not get used anymore?
(
Kroney, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:13,
Reply)
whenever I say it. Does it not get used anymore?
(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:21,
Reply)
I don't think so, no.
But I use it whenever I can. Plus, it does sound a little bit rude. You know. MUFF.
(
Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 17:21,
Reply)
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