Roota's close call
We've been wanting to bar some weird bloke from my place of work for a while. He'd not done anything officially 'wrong', but he'd been generally rude, creepy, smelly, pervy and inappropriate.
Today it transpired that he is this man:
www.metro.co.uk/news/845957-disgraced-ex-lawyer-gets-asbo-for-binge-drinking
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angus_Diggle

This has steeled me to tell the OTHER creepy customer who's been buying me chocolate bars and asking me how much I pay at the hairdressers to FUCK OFF.

What close calls with weirdos have you had?

Alt q Should I gte a job in a lunatic asylum and accept my fate?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:22, 197 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Angus Diggle?
Does he teach at Hogwarts?
( Kroney, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:23, Reply)

He's got a Harry Potter name
hasn't he?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Ah that's mad I was reading about him on the bus and I laughed at his stupid name.
BRUSH WITH FAME OMG
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:25, Reply)

He PONGS

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:28, Reply)

He looks fairly harmless,
but obviously isn't.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:30, Reply)

"Diggle caused something of a sensation when in 1993 he was sentenced to three years in prison for the attempted rape of a woman after a Highland Ball. Her friends found him wearing only frilly cuffs and a luminous condom."
It's horrific. But strangely surreal.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)

I like his excuse to the police
"I spent £200 on her. Why can't I do what I did to her?"
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:32, Reply)

"In 1997 he put his name forward as one of 150 possible candidates for the then vacant Parliamentary seat of Kensington and Chelsea. Tory officials there were at the time keen to avoid embarrassment after then sitting MP Sir Nicholas Scott was de-selected for being found face down in a gutter of a Bournemouth Street. Diggle, perhaps not surprisingly was not selected even on as far as a short-list."

I thought he'd have been a shoe-in; sounds like a typical tory MP.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:34, Reply)

We had no idea who he was and he made us feel reeeeeally uncomfortable from the start
His requests, comments and tales got more and more bizarre.
Then he got smellier.
Then he started falling asleep here. Then staring at female students. Then having dangerously loose trousers.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Danger trousers.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:34, Reply)

Oh my god I'm going to tell everyone in work that Diggle's new name is Dangerkecks

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:35, Reply)

His tie is designed to blind his rape victims

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)

That must be from a while ago.
He looks like a down-and-out now.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:32, Reply)

How the mighty do fall

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)

Sounds like a typical bash attendee
Although I am just generalising from myself, as I rarely remember much about the rest of them.

they're all wonderful people I'm sure
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:27, Reply)

yeah, I catch your drift actually

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Have you tried to rape a co-worker?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:29, Reply)

oh come on, who hasn't?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:37, Reply)

It's not rape, it's "Team building".

( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:41, Reply)

"there's no "I" in rape.

although there is a pear.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:53, Reply)

I think that working in the place you do, you're going to get a few nutters.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Indeed
I was pondering how to tell Chocolate bar to fuck off, but now I'm just going to say "Please stop buying me chocolate bars and commenting on my hair. It is not appropriate."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:30, Reply)

Most of my boyfriends were
as I've mentioned here before. Apart from that, my father, as I've said here too. Then after that, I usually meet weirdos on the street, like the guy who told me that I was prety and that if I married him I'd never had to work again because he was so rich...

That's my life, full of weird people.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Ditto

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:30, Reply)

I think we attract them
Because we don't shout at them or look too scared when they talk to us.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)

This is possibly the reason...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)

We try to be polite
and then we realise our mistake too late.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:34, Reply)

dj was advising me on this problem yesterday

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:35, Reply)

Mark does too
He keeps talling me to shout them "fuck off" and be unpolite. But I feel bad about it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:37, Reply)

Just because someone is a bit strange doesn't mean we should stoop to be rude.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Snap
Some weirdos are harmless and I feel bad saying "Fuck off you fat cunt, as IF!!"
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:39, Reply)

I know
Most of them just offer some funny conversation. It's when I come back home shit scared that Mark tells me that.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:48, Reply)

I do this,
I don't want to upset people, even people who are horrifically offensive themselves.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:38, Reply)

A helicopter just landed down the road
it could have killed me.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Did it fall or did it mean to land?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:30, Reply)

Looks like it was heading to the Ski Slope.
There was probably an accident, I'll link news stories if they come up.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)

There'd better be carnage.
I don't want no sprains n' shit.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)

Hopefully some children have died.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)

or at least a chicken foetus

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)

I don't believe you
POIDH
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:30, Reply)

Obviously I gave the pilot the wrong address.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:30, Reply)

Hahahah

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:32, Reply)

heh.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)

I was in Salford Crescent train station a while ago
at about 11pm. Salford Crescent is the uni stop so it's proper creepy and deserted at night. I was waiting for my connecting train when a man who looked like a cleaner-than-usual-but-still-a-tramp sat down down next to me. He said how cold it was and how well wrapped up I looked. He said my scarf looked thick and warm. He asked if I could see through said scarf. At this point I went from feeling irritably unsociable to a little bit nervous. He asked me to check if I could see through the scarf. I'm thick, but I'm not that thick, so I just held it about 3 feet in front of me and said "yes you can see through it". He then took a little sleeping mask out of his pocket and asked if I thought I would be able to see through that.

At this point I'm hoping that my family put a nice picture of me on the news and not that one where I have two chins and a lazy eye.

I quietly mumbled that I didn't know if one would be able to see through the sleep mask or not, whilst I desperately scanned around for someone, anyone, who might prevent me from becoming someone else's skin.

He then asked me if I wanted to wear it. I have never been more relieved to see my train pulling into the station.

I bought a rape alarm the next day.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)

Fucking hell...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:34, Reply)

That's pretty scary.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)

isn't it?
Right up til the last minute I was thinking he was probably a bit weird but ultimately harmless, but when I think about it, if he had been a psycho I would have been totally fucked. Literally.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Yep, bring back hanging.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Oh, fuck
That's creepy. Glad your train got there on time!

I'm thinking about buying a rape alarm, since the rapist in Manchester attacked another 2 girls and they haven't found him yet.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)

Buy one.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:37, Reply)

I'm going to
On Friday, before I meet Kitty. I have no time during the week.

I was most upset when I asked if I'm allowed to carry a knife or pepper spray to defend myself, and was told no. I can only use "reasonable force" to defend myself. How on Earth am I going to be stronger than a guy?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)

aim for the eyes & testicles.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:41, Reply)

I know
but I think all the raped women have thought that before hand too, and at that moment you don't react as you want.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:44, Reply)

One of my very best friends was raped on March 18th this year.
She was walking home on her own in south London and said that she just "froze" when the cunt started grabbing at her. She can land a punch too.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:48, Reply)

I always wonder what allows rapists to get away with it unscathed
because I'd like to think that I would fight to the death over it, but I know a woman who was dragged into an alley and she said she just let it happen because she was so frightened that he would knife her or something.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Yes, I know of a girl like that
And I've read several stories (in Spain, not here) of women defending themselves and being taking to justice for harming the guy.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:55, Reply)

really?
I would hope that a jury would never convict a woman for defending herself.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Even if you kill someone while they were trying to rape you,
you wouldn't go to prison.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:56, Reply)

I'm not sure about that
There have been sentences failing in favour of the rapist because the woman was wearing tight jeans and that was provocative. Or the other one, when a woman didn't fight back because the guy had a knife on her throat, and the judge understood she gave her consent.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:07, Reply)

In the UK you wouldn't.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:12, Reply)

yeah I'm pretty sure you wouldn't over here
although the rapist might win a civil claim and the woman would have to pay damages.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:15, Reply)

Yes, I think it's better for the woman here
but still, if you harm him defending yourself, he can probably take you to court and win the case.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:32, Reply)

depends on the police, evidence etc
good friend of mine got drugged and raped at a houseparty of one of her colleagues. the guy, a friend of her colleague, is saying it was consensual. she has a total mindblank and can't remember anything apart from one flashback, but tests proved that she did have sex. she would never in a million years have slept with him voluntarily.

she has witness evidence as two other girls weren't raped but were drugged and there is cctv footage of her rattling the gates of the development and screaming to be let out afterwards.

the police won't prosecute him because they say there is insufficient evidence.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:50, Reply)

I have been very impressed with how precise and determined the Operation Sapphire officers have been in dealing with my friend's case. When I was interviewed (as a witness not a suspect before anyone says anything) the DC explained to me their biggest frustrations are getting the CPS to take it forward and having everything so watertight that the defence can't pick any holes in the prosecutions case.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)

From the conversations I had with the SOIT officer (as I was the first to get to my friend afterwards) this freezing thing is very common.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:55, Reply)

bit of a coincidence that you 'happened to be nearby' eh?
_{that's quite an insensitive joke, sorry, I must have been hanging out with Monty too often}
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Took me 40 minutes to get there in a cab at 1am. Longest 40 minutes I have experienced.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Resonable force is fairly encompassing
if someone's trying to rape you, you're allowed to rape them back.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:41, Reply)

Yeah, I see that'd work
...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

you can do what you need to to fight them off
you're just not supposed to keep stamping on their balls once the threat is over. You're supposed to defend yourself until you can leave the scene.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:50, Reply)

Yes, but I think that's wrong
I think, if I manage to put him down, what I should do is to make sure he can't move and call the police, otherwise, he's just going to run away and try again.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Yeah it's a really fine line to tread
If I'd managed to incapacitate him I would want to rain bloody hell down on him for even trying it in the first place, I don't think I'd be able to resist kicking him really hard in the balls.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:56, Reply)

You can say you did it before he was down
it's your word against his.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:07, Reply)

I think that
I'm pretty strong for a girl, but I don't think I'd be able to fend off a male attacker. I think I would just be hoping that if I bit and kicked and scratched enough he'd get fed up.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:42, Reply)

they don't just try to rape you
They like knock you out and shit, if it's the one in Manchester I'm thinking of from a little while back.
Don't be going anywhere on your own.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:46, Reply)

I used to walk home from the train at 10pm but I make Wiggy pick me up now
I read that one of the attacks involved the guy ramming a knitting needle in the poor girl's eye.

And he also leaves them naked at the scene, adding insult to injury.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:49, Reply)

oh my god I would remove his cock with rusty cheesewire

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:50, Reply)

I do really think that sometimes.
If the penalty for rape was castration there probably wouldn't be much rape.

But then there are these stupid bitches who cry rape when they've got pissed and wish they hadn't banged a loser and that makes me really angry.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:52, Reply)

Me too

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Me too too

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:56, Reply)

Nah they tried chemical castration on peados,
just made a bunch of peados angry and then they killed.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:55, Reply)

I suppose removal of the penis wouldn't remove the libido
Let's just stamp RAPIST on their foreheads instead.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:57, Reply)

Rape has very little to do with the libido,
it's much more to do with a sense of power and sadism. That doesn't come from the balls.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:59, Reply)

YOU'D KNOW
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA CHOMPYRAPELOLZ

Also, I meant they'd be super frustrated at not being able to satisfy their libido in a normal way, not just with rapeyness
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:13, Reply)

I never go on my own when it's so late
And even a lot before that. Always go on busy roads. Unfortunately, now I don't have anyone here to pick me. I'm relying in my awful looks with all the winter clothes to put him off.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:52, Reply)

haha me too, he would have to get through so many layers he would be like "fuck this"

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:57, Reply)

Haha, exactly
That's the way forward! Passive protection.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:08, Reply)

Yes, that's the problem
The guy comes using his force or drugs to take you down, and the only thing you can do to defend yourself is to use reasonable force, otherwise, you are the one in trouble with justice.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:50, Reply)

You're overthinking it,
you'll be fine unless you go around looking for rapists with a weapon.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:11, Reply)

Thanks
I feel so much better now.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:33, Reply)

He's right
If you hit a guy in the head with a brick because he's attacking you, you have grounds for doing it. If you do it just because you don't like him, it's a different story.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:35, Reply)

Knee in the balls is the best way.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:48, Reply)

This is what I'm relying on

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:49, Reply)

It sounds odd
but, really, there's a very good reason you can't carry a knife - it's an offensive weapon as well as a defensive one. It's very difficult to claim non-premeditated reasonable force if you stab someone with a knife you'd brought out with you, because you're carrying deliberately and therefore have at least considered you might stab someone with it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:57, Reply)

I reckon it's more than one
I reckon now that there's a Serial Rapist out there, the others are like "ooh, open season"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)

Rapelols!!!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)

I didn't mean to make it sound so lighthearted
I genuinely do think there's more than one though because most of the attacks were in Fallowfield and the surrounding area, but now there have been some in the city as well. Plus it's a huge city, there can't just be one rapist.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

No
He'd be exhausted.

Sorry. i actually think it's terrifying.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:45, Reply)

It does make me a bit nervous, especially for Applebite who actually lives round there
and wanders around a lot.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:46, Reply)

She'd better pack it in

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Hopefully her creepy friend is following her around most the time.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:54, Reply)

You mean You?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:02, Reply)

Yes I mean me.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:04, Reply)

Chompy's started running coach trips

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)

You think?
They got the last rape on CCTV, the bastard didn't care about it. The police description: male, tall, dark hair. Thanks, that narrows it down a lot.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:42, Reply)

The Fallowfield guy is supposed to be fat and Asian, early 40s apparently.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

Well, then this one could be
the description said too between 30s and 40s.

I'm taking a much longer way back home to avoid dark streets. Still, I don't like this feeling. I grow up in a very nice little place. Bad men are only on the news or on TV
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:46, Reply)

or carry me round with you
I am much louder
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)

That's a good idea
But we live too far :(
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:42, Reply)

O_O
That's terrifying.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:39, Reply)

I would have suggested he got himself to fuck
Or got up and walked off
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

there was nowhere to walk off to though, it's a really long staircase out of the station and then a deserted underpass on one side or empty uni buildings on the other

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Sometimes with these waki cunts
you've got to nip it in the bud right away, don't even enter into any form of conversation with them. be rude, fuck 'em.

one morning i got on my train, in none too good a mood, and sat in what was an almost empty carriage. all of a sudden this cunt beak got on and strode right down to where I was sitting and sat across from me. He immediately made some sort of over friendly remark, i stood up and walked into the next carriage without so much as a word. I sat down on the first group of four seats, with my back to the rest of the carriage, there was a bloke sitting behind me.

All seemed normal, until the guy started talking to himself and then swearing and arguing with himself in a loud and angry voice. I started to freak out a bit and turned round and in my best 'dont fuck with me' voice I told him to settle the fuck down. He nervously apologised and started muttering softly to himself. At that very moment the inter carriage door opened and in walked a VERY unconvincing transvestite, complete with stubble and sussies....

The train i was on was not my usual train, but the one after...it must have been the freak out express, every cunt on it seemed to be fractured.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:58, Reply)

Was it a train to Kilburn? There's thousands of mentals there.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:06, Reply)

I remember getting the train to work once when a really, REALLY drunk guy got on
and started shouting and being really rude to everyone and then he went and sat with a bunch of muslim girls wearing hijaabs and started screaming at them to speak in English. It wasn't even 8am, bit early for such massive racism.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:13, Reply)

Sorry about that. I don't do it anymore.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:19, Reply)

holy shit that's dreadful

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:07, Reply)

We once brought the local homeless loon who spoke only in gibberish to my mate's house and he wouldn't leave.
He got knocked down and killed by the 119 bus a while after though so we're fine now.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:34, Reply)

Had you driven a bus before?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:35, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)

Probably a trip to
a local garden centre aged 17 to get a Christmas tree. Went with my Mum and the 60 year old proprietor kept putting himself in between me and Mum/Shelves/Trees and finally ending up copping a none too subtle feel of my crotch.

Didn't tell my Mum till we'd left.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:41, Reply)

we'd left she asked why I kept going back to the garden centre.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:42, Reply)

It just felt natural
amongst the plants.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

I think some old bloke got me pregnant at the Scott Monument on Saturday
I think he deliberately stood at the narrowest point on the steps so that he could feel people up
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Some guy did that to me at a festival
we were crushed in the pit and he put his hand right down the back of my jeans and had a right good feel of my arse, but I couldn't do anything to stop it, it was horrible.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:45, Reply)

Haven't washed my hand since
*prouds*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:46, Reply)

I tried to punch the guy
did it hurt?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:47, Reply)

No
I have a very high pain threshold.

Edit: And you punch like a girl.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:49, Reply)

I hate having my arse felt by someone I barely know.
I hope Bill reads this.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:48, Reply)

lolz

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:51, Reply)

I read the first few words of that and my heart dropped though my undies
then I read the rest and laughed

*fans self*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:46, Reply)

I hope I'm not
He was ugly and had a voice like Gordon Brittas.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:48, Reply)

I hope you're not too
you're far too broody to be having kids.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:52, Reply)

Isn't it broody people who tend to have kids?
Besides, I only like borrowing them, not raising them.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Not a close call
But Bristol had the most fantastic wino a few years back.

www.thisisbristol.co.uk/news/2-000-join-Facebook-tribute-page-poet-lived-Bristol-s-streets/article-1627045-detail/article.html

I've just got up.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

And now there's only one reason to visit Bristol
www.thisisbristol.co.uk/news/Bristol-burger-biggest-Britain/article-1372450-detail/article.html
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:48, Reply)

The super scooby!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:51, Reply)

A 2,645 calorie burger, and if you finish it in one go, you get a free can of Coke.
Diet Coke, natch.
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Natch would be a better drink to get with it!
Natch. A lovely cider.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:55, Reply)

"Natch I up, barman".
Oi int bin ter Brizzle fer a while ...
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:58, Reply)

Thanks for mentioning cider so early in the day, I now want to go to the pub.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:00, Reply)

I can't wait to get home and have a drink.
God that sounds awful.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:04, Reply)

I will be breaking my normal "not before 6pm on a weekday" rule tonight as I got up at 4.30am

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:06, Reply)

I'm going to the gym first so it will be a 6pm start.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:07, Reply)

Afternoon Blousie.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:06, Reply)

Good afternoon.
You feeling better?
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:07, Reply)

Worse.
Unbelieveable though it sounds, I feel worse today than at any point over the last week or so.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:08, Reply)

Hopefully you've peaked and it will get better.
What medication did the doctor give you?
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:13, Reply)

Nothing
I'm on Nurofen and paracetamol.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:14, Reply)

Proper hydration (not booze) is important.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:16, Reply)

^This

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:18, Reply)

I'm doing all that.
I'm just not getting any better.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:21, Reply)

You need your mum to give you a big hug.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:24, Reply)

And then some soup.

(Cave Duck, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:26, Reply)

In the absence of mother at this point.
I'll have to settle for a cup of coffee and a biscuit.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:27, Reply)

Not really the same thing.
When I feel ill I want my mum and I'm 45.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:29, Reply)

Mothers are over-rated.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:31, Reply)

Mine is useless but I still feel safe when she's around.
Silly, I know.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:35, Reply)

Not spoken to mine for about 16 years (it may be longer - can't remember)
She tried adding me on FB a couple of weeks ago which was very random.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Strange.
You'd think if she wanted a reconcilliation, a letter would have been more appropriate.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:42, Reply)

Having read some of your QOTW posts
about your childhood, I'm surprised you didn't try and set fire to the audacious cow. I mean, seriously, why the hell would you want to add her on facebook after 16 years of silence and after what she put you through?
(berk, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)

She is delusional.
I have just realised it's her birthday tomorrow. Another day forward towards the joyful day when the rancid old cunt snuffs it.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:47, Reply)

my mum was pretty unsympathetic
I have inherited this. I tell myself to man the fuck up.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:33, Reply)

Have you stopped chundering?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:25, Reply)

Only because I've nothing left to bring up.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:27, Reply)

You really ought to take care of yourself
if you actually have influenza and not just a nasty cold.
(berk, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:32, Reply)

The doc said it was influenza
Rest, rehydrate and paracetamol was the suggestion.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:35, Reply)

Yeah, there aren't really any drugs they can give
as antivirals only work in the first few days. If you can't keep food down though, or don't feel like eating, you must make sure you stay hydrated. Lots of hot vimto and NO booze.
If you didn't live miles away I would make you my amazing chicken soup!
(berk, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:39, Reply)

I don't care for chicken soup
And I've never tried vimto.

But I do have some Ribena, so I'm going to make a hot one of those!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)

i've never had flu
but both my parents had it at some point or another, and they both get (well, got in my mum's case) really annoyed with people who have a heavy cold saying "it's a touch of 'flu". they both said proper flu knocks you out for about 6 weeks and you feel like death.

poor old beast, hope it doesn't take that long.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:39, Reply)

yeah it really annoys me when people are off work for 2 days and come back saying they've had flu

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)

And it now annoy me too!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)

This is the first time I've had flu
And it really is very very different from having a cold. I'm in pain and everything.

How is the hangover?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)

As far as I can remember I've had flu once.
It is completely different to having a cold.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)

I lost a stone when I caught flu in college.
My mum nearly took me to hospital fearing I had meningitis
(Bazongaloid, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)

Well, I was meant to be meeting a few in London a few weeks back...
Bash LOLZ.

I was taught by a guy who was recently arrested for having child porn. That's about it really, not very interesting.

And, I ended up going with Fish & Chips for lunch.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)

I worked with this bloke a few years ago (not at a school)
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_midlands/4156117.stm
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:45, Reply)

With a name like 'Dick Small', teaching was not for him.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:47, Reply)

Yep.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:50, Reply)

My head teacher was called Mr Bent.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:51, Reply)

You went to school?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:57, Reply)

hey, he got a 2:2 y'know
he has a clever.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 13:59, Reply)

Not a 2:1 then?

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:00, Reply)

or a first?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:01, Reply)

No.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:02, Reply)

I love this monosyllabic response
it just oozes bitterness.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:10, Reply)

I'm going to find your C.V and then put your entire academic record on here

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:01, Reply)

At least you managed to spell CV nearly right.
Edit: I am wise to your ninja ways, grasshopper. Witnesses, have I.
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:02, Reply)

haha

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:03, Reply)

sorry darling
feel free to mock me, I don't even have A Levels.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:10, Reply)

You do have a personality though.
That's not something that everyone on here can claim.
(Cave Duck, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:21, Reply)

ooh acid tongue!
also, thanks, take that everyone else.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:24, Reply)

I thought only Darth on here went in for that kind of thing.

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:05, Reply)

Is the second guy the Milky Bar Kid fallen on hard times?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:28, Reply)

nothing too recent
what sticks out in my mind is the guy that lives behind my parents house used to talk to the neighbor girl and I when we were about 9ish, he would stand out in his back yard and watch us play and say hi
then one day he was talking about his job, where he delivers supplies to schools like the one her and I go to, supplies like toilet paper and sanitary napkins and tampons
and at that age we didn't know what he was talking about
her mum called her to come inside so she ran off, and he asked me if I wanted to come over and play in his camper, listen to music, etc
I said I had to go home
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:34, Reply)

someone should start a new thread.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)

you do it
isn't there a terribly boring science article we can all not care about?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 3 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)