Nuts, anyone?
My personal favourite silly monicker was attached to a girl at my school who went by the unfortunate name of "Squirrel".....Kennedy was her surname, I believe.

Oh yes, and there was a "Pharic" too, I believe.....Smith, this time.

A local school, for local children, you understand.

Oh, and how could I forget the teacher, Robert Sless. Fine until you read the "R. Sless" sign on his door.
(FieldingMellish, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 9:04, Reply)

names from school
Two brothers at school called Andrew Ness and Peter Ness. All fine until role call-

A.Ness?
Sir.

P.Ness?
Sir.

Guaranteed hysterics every assembly
( Badger_Phenomenon, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:50, Reply)

Stupid Names
I've not come across many stupid names, although a bloke called Rob Megran, got a few chuckles.

Until he mugged my grandmother..... bastid.

Disclaimer: He never actually robbed my gran... that bit was a lie, but his name is real
(NoMoreFaith can believe its not bloody butter, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:40, Reply)

Snigger
Looking through the company address book in Outlook, just seen "Sandra Blowing-Scott". Don't know her, but she sounds like a Dirty bitch.
(pen-al™, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:37, Reply)

Hows about....
Sharon
Helen
Isobel
Tait

Look again at the initials of her name... she went to my school.. poor girl.
(insaniac1, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:31, Reply)

..
One of our suppliers was called Bata Matic and I so wanted our account manager for the suppliers who beat them on every respect to be called VeeJay Hess.
(kna has forgotten everything., Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:30, Reply)

oh and don't forget
Woody Johnson.
(LaChicKitten, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:25, Reply)

headmaster
The former headmaster's name was

William M. Williams.

and he went to Williams College.
(LaChicKitten, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:23, Reply)

There were a few amusing names
on the computer system where I used to work.

Among the favourites were a Miss Gaye Hardicker, a Mr Anil Chagger and a Mr Wank (pronounced 'vonk' as a colleage was told in no uncertain terms over the phone).

Although not the rudest, my favourite was Mrs Fanny Scratcher. Partly because she had passed away after a good, long life and partly because she obviously married into the name.

It made me wonder what her maiden name could have been. Blisters perhaps?
( Mystery_Bob, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:21, Reply)

Daft Names
So many!

Throughout the course of my work as a civil servant I encountered such names as.

Locutus Locutus,
Mr Nottingham-Forest,
Kevin Keegan,
Royal Talbot, (deedpolled after his local!)
Dean Dean, (cruel parents!)
Mr MMM Spider, (Magical Mystical Magic - I kid you not)
Duane Pipe,
Lucifer Lambert,
Hayley Bailey,
Lucretia Raven-Flame,
amongst others.

Also used to deal with maternity grants, some sick chavmother called her kids...

Fox Leon Cobain,
Star Elliott,
Harley Atlanta,
and not forgetting their older sister Kimberley!

Another charver was obviously a subscriber to (or regular shoplifter of) Max Power or other lowbrow car-ruining pamphlet and his kids were called,

Gere,
Gauge,
Blue,
and Buick

Oh dear!
(Suomi_Finland_Perkele knocking 256 shades of shit out of your screen on, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:19, Reply)

at school
two guys who went to my school:

Paul VonSuck
and
I-Perfection Harris.

I know all parents think that THEIR baby is the best in the world, but come on, get over it!
(LaChicKitten, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:14, Reply)

unique indeed
When i was in high school a gospel choir from Chicago came and visited us. One of the singers was a bloke by the name of New Unique Choice. That was his first three names, his full name was something like New Unique Choice Wilson. His friends called him New Unique for short.
(heatmiser, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:12, Reply)

There is a guy
on our database calle mr o'nions. Come on mate, who are you trying to kid?

Oh, and now there is a client called mr Gay cos i just put him on there (with my mate Glenn's address.. obviously)
( Terry Nutkins, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 8:07, Reply)

I was at school
with a guy called Lee Flatt. He had a sister called Pam.

Lee Flatt and Pam Flatt.
( Purple Martin is board sigless, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:47, Reply)

TWA Pilot
I worked at the TWA training centre in Kansas once. The locals couldn't understand why I was falling about laughing, having seen a name tag on one of the pilot cases: "Capt. Hank Wank"

I kid you not.
(You're all morons., Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:38, Reply)

Patrick Moore? That reminds me..
I had a Calculus prof named Michael Moore.
(BlurOfSerenity, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:38, Reply)

there is a guy at work
called patrick moore
100% FACT


/ok so not a stupid name, but a great one
( Dave - KneHigHbOb talks, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:37, Reply)

Ministry Of Defence
I work within IT for the MOD and have regular dealings with the following people:

John Waine
Maj Payne (Bruce Payne)
Maj Hazard
Windy Gale
Bombadier De'ath ( Me likee this one. He pronounced thie 'dee-ath)
Jack Straw (Not the real one)
Mr Fudge-Pacqer
Ozzy Osburn (No kidding
Ryder Strong
Richard Head

Im sure there are more but cant remember at the mo' Waaay too early in the morning for me.
( diablo290582 Professional.....something., Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:36, Reply)

Aquaintances of my parents from medical school...
They all graduated apparently, so somewhere out there now, there's a Dr. Butcher, a Dr. Death (it's pronounced "deeth") and a Dr. Blood (who is now a haematologist, aptly enough.)
(BlurOfSerenity, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:27, Reply)

I worked with
an Emma Royd-Taylor.
Why would anyone go double barrelled with that name?
Edit: We also have a Jeremy Fisher at work. Forgot about him until I saw Peter Rabbit below...
( nick the greek, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:27, Reply)

Mycock
Our family used to know a family with the surname Mycock. The Dad was an electrician. His shop name? Mycock's Electrical.

I also worked in an insurance office once and ended up filing the details of Mr. Mister and his wife, Mrs. Mister.
(gibletwarrior, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:24, Reply)

We used to keep a list of stupid names at work. Here is a mere selection... and they're all for real!
Dr Bumgardner
Ivy Shmirkin
Roger Boys
Dick Stain (why oh why didn't he call himself Richard???)

I also knew a psychiatrist called Dr Brain,
and a gynaecologist called Mr Ciclitoris (no he didn't have a stutter).
( Purple Martin is board sigless, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 7:22, Reply)

dumb names
I was in a class in school with a guy called Brian O'Brien. I though Bob would be an obvious alias but no one ever callled him that.
(nycmstar, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 6:59, Reply)

Jones the Steam
My uncle's mate's dad was called Morgan. Morgan Morgan. He was also a church organist and lived in Wales and was thus referred to as Morgan the Organ or Organ Morgan.
( wingpig wish I'd known about liquify eighteen years ago, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 6:20, Reply)

university
with some called Snow Hope. I think she did psychology.
(frankly, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 6:00, Reply)

My family's surname
As created by a slip of the pen on my granddad's marriage license, is spelt 'Churosh' - a variation on the original Czech spelling 'Curosh.'

It's caused me no end of trouble... I almost inevitably have to correct people's pronunciation of my name (CHUR-ahsh) - and am filled with seething resentment for those who stubbornly continue mispronouncing it chuRAAHSH, chu-ROASH, Churrish/Churshh, or Khurosh. Not to mention that, despite my obvious dosage of Mick/Kraut ancestry on my mother's side, a number of these people inexplicably believe that I am Jewish.

But the WORST violation came on one of the first days of gym class in my freshman year of high school - and anyone reading this who lves on MY side of the Atlantic knows what a wonderful fucking experience that is... Well, the gym teacher was calling us all out by our last names, and when he came to mine, he paused - and oh God, I thought, here it comes. And I don't know HOW he could fuck up my name this badly - but he started with a hard 'c,' left the 'u' out completely and turned the 'sh' into a 'ch'... which, of course, made my name sound mildly obscene.

Despite his immediate apologies, I knew what I had to look forward to. And indeed, every single one of my classmates who was there that day and heard him mangle my name absolutely INSISTED on calling me "Crotch" for the next FOUR FUCKING YEARS, until we all graduated. Assholes.
(Dr.Whogivesaratsarse, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 5:51, Reply)

Pornstar names
While a teacher in Cambodia I had a student by the name of Neon Sally.
(junglejim, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 5:50, Reply)

Adolfo Fuck
www.unb.br/ig/prof/ReinhardtAdolfoFuck.htm
(grisleygrogan, Fri 27 Aug 2004, 5:43, Reply)