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This is a question Unexpected Good Fortune

Travelling through Seattle a good 15 years ago, I remembered an old friend I used to blow up Action Men with. We were bored, nothing to lose , so I looked him up in the phonebook. He was the only one of that name in there. "Come and stay," goes he.

Me and my mates were living in a car at that point so a bed was a novelty. After searching for a while, we rock up to a very posh mansion on Puget Sound with its own Helipad. "Come flying," goes he.

Has your luck held out recently?

(, Thu 14 Sep 2006, 18:43)
Pages: Latest, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, ... 1

This question is now closed.

Pink or brown first? Eeny meeny, mo....
My rather good stroke of luck (well, vinegar strokes really), was when I went out "for a quiet drink" with my deviant friend who had previously introduced me to swingers' parties.

Up until then I had been the "extra single guy", handy for helping out with the odd spit roast, or providing a few cc's of basting fluid, which is not so bad, but you definitely feel like erm, well, a spare prick at an orgy.
SO, anyway, after several convival drinks in the local, it's back to the Man's place where he decides he's actually pretty knackered, and had recorded some football match, which he really wanted to watch. Would I mind taking care of his wife and her girl-friend while he settled down in the lounge with the game?
Does the Pope shit in the woods? Ding Dong! I fucked like a hero (as I always do, natch), I balled the pair of them this way and that, I winked at myself in the full length mirror at the foot of the bed. I even did that one-hand- behind-your-own-head-and-one-behind-your-back silly pose whilst the two lovely ladies had their heads down doing lady things. My face actually ached from grinning so much, (anyone remember the Warrant video for"Cherry Pie"? Where Jani Lane's grin actually extends past his ears? That was me!) The spoff shot would have had Peter North wishing he could do one with so much force and elegance. Total heroics.

I was knackered, both girls walked out like John Wayne, and my mate was long asleep on the sofa when I finally staggered out of his bedroom. I just wanted to tell EVERYONE what a lucky bastard I was, including my Maw and Paw, the next day when they asked if I had had a nice night, and why I had such a spring in my step. It nearly killed me to just shrug my shoulders and say, "yeah, not bad, y'know".

Never been the same since, and I have got up to far filthier antics than that, on a regular basis! Oh yes.
You never forget the first time you are lucky enough to bag 2 bi chicks!!!!!

What the fuck am I doing typing this? I'm on holiday.........
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 19:49, Reply)
my lucky bastid brother
Years ago my brother opened a business type bank account with a well known high steet name and he placed a reasonable sum of money (couple of hundred pounds) into the account in order to keep it open. He had an idea for a side business connected to the work he did for another company but nothing ever came of it and the account was forgotten in the mists of time.

Many moons later (or about 4 years in real terms) he got a phone call from his bank regarding his account, the wanted to speak to him about it for some reason. Suddenly remembering, he thought that a couple of hundered quid could be quite useful as things were getting a bit tight that particular month, the bank probably wanted him to close it down due to the fact he hadn't done anything with it.

An appointment was made for an advisor to see him the following week and he went along happy in the knowledge he might be £200 up. What he actually got was a lot better.

A banking error meant that money had been deposited into his account on a regular basis by a company with a very similar banking number..... just one digit different. the bank had traced their error and had already removed the extra funds out of my brothers account and back into the rightful owners. They basically informed him of what had happened and 'rewarded' him to the tune of £1500.....He promptly closed the account and left with £1700 + a bit of interest!!

This sounds a bit far fetched I know but I still have the newspaper clippings to prove this!
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 18:28, Reply)
bah - Sn0tters
Here's luck for you

The numbers for the lotto on 16/Sep/2006.

I'd tell you the numbers for Friday's but I want the money for myself.

Well that was a waste of a quid......
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 16:57, Reply)
big useless teddy bear
I used to live in the charming seaside town of Brixham, where everyone is related to everyone else, and the fishermen will fight you to the death if you look towards them.

On the fisherman's quay, where the thugs hang out and mend their nets, was a church fete. I was walking past, and bumped into a couple of friends, and we stood chatting.

For no reason whatsoever, I said "excuse me a mo, I'm just going to go and win that bear" pointing to a 3ft tall cuddly panda. I walked over to the tombola stall, said "I'll have that bear please", paid for one ticket, pulled it out and won the bear.

I was as surprised as everyone else.

Didn't have any use for the bear though, as I was a single teenage bloke. It ended up in my friends garage until it went mouldy and I threw it away.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 15:56, Reply)
Good to bad
Going to be a bit of a longish one. Sorry, but here it is... The day before my birthday a few years ago I was working late in a job I didn't want to do. I was frantically searching for another job. It was also just over with a woman I was dating. So things were looking a bit glum as I was approching 28. Anyway, I get off of the pretty dodgy overland station in east London and walk a bit then I get accosted by three young punks who steal my phone and wallet (20 quid). They threatened to stab me. Kicked me to the ground and all that. My health was in order, so good for that. However, the whole situation was quite frightening. At that point I pretty much hated society and all it had to offer.

So I go through the malarkey of contacting the police, getting my cards cancelled/reordered. Then worst of all was to get the phone cancelled which was a pain.

So I was really down and had planned birthday dinner and drink with close friends, then a big party the day after. Naturally I was not feeling up for it.

Just before I left to see my friends, my work colleagues gave me a card of sympathy with a little collection for me. Very touching. My dinner/drinks was really nice as well. They were very supportive and kind. I started to feel a bit better about people.

Cue the next day. Feeling better and looking forward to seeing more of my friends. The party was a huge success. People had a great time. I got pretty hammered. It was just near the end of the night, feeling confident and good. I ended up asking this girl at the party back to my place. Here Mr. DeLarge actually gets lucky. Nice.

The next morning I was having breakfast with this young lady and I got a call that I was to come in for an interview for a really good job I applied for (which I ended up getting)! I would have to say that capped off the most successful 24 hours I had, which was opposite from one of the worst days of my life.

It takes some event to shake you to see how much your friends and family can come out to support you.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 15:43, Reply)
I won £10 on the lottery once
Probably spent more than that on tickets though.

Apologies for lameness.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 15:19, Reply)
See - Yorkshire isn't all bad
I once left my wallet on a bus, and some scrote nicked off with it. (Stay with me, this gets better)

It was a week before I went on holiday, so cue frantic ring round for replacement credit cards, ID cards, and provisional driving license (which I needed for my test the week after, worse luck). I finally got everything together by Friday and headed off for the sunny North of Yorkshire.

First day there, we decide to take a walk along the beach to Sandsend - about two miles - and it's a hot day so I'm carrying my coat. We're just getting to the end of our little trip and I check in my coat pocket for my new wallet - nothing. I've only gone and lost the sodding thing again, and it's lying forlornly somewhere on about two square miles of sand.

In a massive huff now, I decide to retrace my steps and quickly find it impossible with the hundreds of holidaymakers that are milling about - and then out of the blue I'm approached by these two unassuming-looking women.

"Are you Umeeksk?" one of them asks.

Astonished, I reply yes - and they produce my wallet and hand it back to me, complete with the fifty in cash I'd drawn out that morning. Turns out they'd found it, checked out my driving license and then - rather than keep it, or hand it in to the police - spent twenty minutes actually *looking* for me.

Thanking them profusely, and gesturing to a nearby pub, I ask, "Can I buy you a drink or something?"

"No thanks - we're Jehova's witnesses."

*How lucky is that?*

The moral of the story is - be kind to Jehova's Witnesses, one day they might find your wallet.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 14:33, Reply)
Trail Of Twentys
I was filling up my car at a pertrol station a few weeks ago just outside of Chesire and as i was walking over to the hut thing to pay i saw on the floor £20, so i went down and picked it up, then about a step away from that another £20 and then one more £20!!! £60 in a line towards the door.
Once i picked these up i looked around and there was no one about so then i looked got CCTV Camera's and there where non! I paid for my petrol and had £40 left over!!!!

Sorry if you are the person that lost £60 in a crappy petrol station outside of chesire!!!
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 14:09, Reply)
another one! even better...
I entered a Manchester newspaper competition last year, organised by Duvel beer. The prize was a big Duvel beer glass and a bottle of beer in a celebratory canister. I answered the question, filled in the slip, posted it (second class of course), and thought no more about it.

I won! Hooray!

Then, a month or two later...I won again! Hooray again! They even apologised for forgetting to send me my prize the first time.

Heh heh, I won't tell them if you won't.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 13:09, Reply)
random fortune
My dad and younger brother were wandering around a supermarket in the early 1990's and happened upon their GP, an obviously muslim man by the name of Dr Shah (I am confident that doesn't narrow things down!). They proceeded to chat, my father and Dr Shah. Upon learning that it was my younger brother's birthday that day, he instantly produced a £20 note (back when £20 actually bought you a lot) and handed it to my brother.

I'll always remember him as the man who cured me of my "dirty wirus!" when I had stomach pains for several days.

A good news story about muslims at least. I think he is in Pakistan now, handing out £20 notes to the jihadis.

By me.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 11:57, Reply)
Drunk cash machine I guess
I didn't receive this luck unfortuantely but one year at Swansea Uni, the cash machines thought it would be a great idea to give you twice the money you'd asked for without actually debiting your account for it so if you took out £100, the bank would say you had taken out £100 but you had £200 cash in your hand.

Oh the queues for those cashpoints were huge! They found out eventually and rectified the fault before I could get in there but with a £300 withdrawl limit, I wonder how many people managed to get a free £300 cash injection.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 10:50, Reply)
one lucky year
1987: i picked the right numbers for a trifecta at the horse races and won +$1500, $1000 for 5 koalas on the poker machines, $100 on scratch tickets (twice) and twice got 5 numbers in lotto ($500 & $800)

all years since: sweet eff all...

although i did get 2 free tickets to see billy connolly earlier this year (at $100 a pop, i was not complaining)
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 10:32, Reply)
Hazy Days After El Camino
I had just finished walking 800km across the north of spain one July. My two friends and I travelled to Madrid to fly back to Ireland. Unfortunately however, there was some problem with our flight that would leave us stranded in Madrid for another 2 days; under normal curcumstances this would be fine, but we hadn't a penny left between us, and we were very tired.

Options also exhausted, we were panned out on some ballard outside Madrid airport musing that had we even a small bit of weed we could pass the days happilly.

Cue a young woman exiting the airport, directly approaching our unkempt, smelly, just-walked-500-miles selves, and asking us if we spoke english. She gave a short explanation and promptly gifted us with a large lump of very sticky pollen hash.

I can recall some very balmy afternoons spent on the steps of the royal palace, watching the city go by. We had a lot of luck on that Camino.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 10:12, Reply)
The day I won the lottery
My mum is possibly one of the smartest people I know. Even now as I approach thirty and she’s an OAP, I go to her for her help with so much stuff.

However, my poor old mum is prone to the odd “blip” every now and then. Usually it’s repeating something she’s already told me, or asking me a question that she knows the answer to but has forgotten.

At Christmas time in 2003, she excelled herself.

Alongside my normal Christmas present, mum gave me a card with a lottery ticket inside. It was called a “Millionaire Maker”, and the general idea was that if you matched the numbers, you were guaranteed £1m no matter who else won. Lovely.

Seeing as I’m a cynical sod, I didn’t bother checking the numbers, knowing damn well I wouldn’t be winning. I’m also the complete opposite to my mum, who was extremely excited to find out if either of the two tickets she had bought me were winners.

As it was Christmas Day, there were no papers to check, and despite my protests that I wanted to check them in my own time, mum insisted she had written the numbers down when the draw was made and scurried off to the kitchen to find them.

Two minutes later I was handed a piece of paper with the winning lottery numbers written down. I can’t remember now what they were, but they matched perfectly the numbers on one of my tickets. I checked it, and checked it again.

“Did you win?” mum asked.

Never one to overstate a situation, I handed her the tickets and the numbers she’d given me. “You tell me.”

She checked the first ticket – no numbers matched. She checked the second ticket, blinked, checked it again, and starting beaming. “You’ve got all of the numbers, haven’t you?”

I checked the ticket again, and yes, I was a winner. Not just a winner, but a millionaire! In the few seconds it took to sink in, I knew what I would do. I’d give up work, pay off the mortgage, have a big holiday, organise a much better wedding than the one we had planned. It was all crystal clear.

For five minutes the room buzzed – Me, mum, and my fiancée. Even the kids knew something good was happening. Me being me, I HAD to double check – This kind of thing NEVER happens to me.

I booted up the PC, and jumped online. The lottery site was down, so I was left trawling news sites for confirmation of the numbers. After a couple of minutes I found them. I grabbed my lottery ticket and began comparing the two.

Strange, the numbers were different. Ahh, they hadn’t updated the site, these were last weeks Millionaire Maker numbers! Then it hit me – They only do the Millionaire Makers once a year.

It turns out that mum had jotted down the numbers on the tickets she’d given me so that she could check them for herself. For some reason, she’d only written down the numbers from one ticket, and though she’d written down the winning numbers from the night before, she’d given me the wrong piece of paper to check them on.

In some ways I was unlucky – I truly believed that I was a millionaire. In other ways, I was lucky, as I got to experience what it feels like to win the lottery: The breathless, heartbeat-skipping, total elation of it all. Better than sex, drugs and scoring the winning goal in a Cup Final.

I’m still skint though.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 8:42, Reply)
Schadenfruede in the casino
After a particularly torrid session on the Guinness and Jameson's, I somehow found myself in Southport casino at 2am, blind drunk.

I'd spent all my money, but fortunately there was an ATM in the casino! How clever of them. My bank balance was about £200 shy of my overdraft limit, with over a week to go until payday. I drew out £100, sat at the blackjack table, and lost it all in approximately 10 minutes.

No matter, thinks my brain from within its comfy pool of alcohol, I've still got another £100 available! I'll just win it back!

And so I pulled out another £100, bringing myself right up to my overdraft limit and returned to the blackjack table, where the croupier was already visibly smirking.

Down to £20 after about 5 minutes, my prospects looked bleak. I had already mentioned, in somewhat slurred fashion, that I'd just drawn out every last penny I had available - the pit staff seemed to be enjoying my concerned look. Smug gits.

I first realised that I was doing quite well when I was asked by a visibly grumpy pit boss to change my £5 chips for £25 chips, as the table had almost run out of £5s. Two hours later the casino closed, and I walked out with about a grand in my arse pocket, a smug grin on my face, and left no tip.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 7:48, Reply)
buy me a bed, nutter!
when i first moved to toronto i was not quite flush with cash, mostly due to the fact that i'd taken the summer off work before the move. i needed a new bed and had ridden my bike to the local mattress store to look for a cheapie, and while i was locking up my bike, a man appeared in front of me, handed me a $100.00 bill and said "excuse me, can i give you something?" i thanked him, sure it was just a fake with an ad on the back, but it was real. looking down the street, i saw him approaching lots of people, some of whom actually refused his offer.

i went in to the mattress store, found a great set (which happened to be on sale, hurrah), and paid with the hundred (and some of my cash). next day in the news was the story of the man walking up the street handing out money, turned out he was a little nutty and very wealthy.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 4:12, Reply)
I just won £380 in the casino - after placing a £1 bet on the puggies ( and after losing £10 on the roulette table).
Slightly makes up for losing several tens of pounds last time!!!
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 2:41, Reply)
I was trying to work out how to afford to go and see a live performance of the musical my fave movie of all time is based on earlier this week. Being rent week, and me only having just heard about it (with a one-week run!), it wasn't really looking good.

I visited a mate in a rough area, and didn't fancy waiting at the train station for half an hour for my train, so I ducked over to the pub for a beer and decided to throw $5 in the pokies- won a mini-jackpot, enough to take me and a mate. I decided, as cash funds were low, to put the tickets on the credit card and spend my cash on food and stuff.

When we got there the next night, the ticket-seller sold me the more expensive tickets, in between me raving about how excited I was, and how much I love the show. I asked if she could cancel those and sell me the cheaper ones as I am poor...

She cancelled them before promptly realising that the funds would take three days to go back onto my credit card. ARGH! quoth I- I dunno if I can pay cash and still live til payday, without any available credit either (yeah, its maxed out).

Since I work in customer service, it didn't even occur to me to go mental at her- she was a nice girl.

So while I'm filling my mate in on what's going on and despairing of getting in, she whips up a couple of *free* tickets. Score!
Best show ever, and now I could afford to buy the Tshirt.

I figured I couldn't do anything nice for her in case her supervisor cottoned on (and she wasn't wearing a name-tag so I couldn't do something anonymous, like flowers, down the track) so I went out and bought some gloves and beanies at a bankrupcy sale for $1 each, and gave them out to homeless people to thank whatever governs karma for this bounty.

Then I got a call from a guy I was seeing a couple of years ago- we've both just broken up with people, haven't caught up in ages, and end up having a spliff and a night of great shagging.

I got a call from my best friend from when I was 15- lost touch when I ran away from home- having kept my number, and we're catching up for coffee today.

Last night I found out that the guy I had been trying not to like has given up on the chick who has been screwing him around for a while, so I got to make out with him. It was fun. Yay!

Also I got to go to a food expo for work this week. Picture the Candy Convention from the Simpsons, but with alcohol, seafood, gelato....you get the idea.

Oh, and I find more four-leaf clovers than anyone I have ever met. I think I averaged around 1 a day this week.

Still, I think karma might just be trying to make up for the manager I am stuck with...but that's another story.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 2:36, Reply)
As I was about to logoff

I've just had a real spot of good luck. Just discovered a pork scratching in my bed I lost a couple of weeks ago. I started the search for it as soon as I lost it, but as my attention span is that of a 2 year olds, I never got around to finishing the hunt. I must admit, I really struggle to keep any kind of focus for longer than 5 minutes, and to be honest, I often rarely get round to finishing off many of my sentenc
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 1:47, Reply)
Free Guitar
Actually related to question of the week.

At the age of 17, modelling myself on Janis Joplin, decided to learn to play guitar, and Daddy Stunt took me to music shop to purchase an electric guitar. I was to pay him back monthly from my ill gotten gains baby-sitting (adults dressed as babies). Found a lovely shiny black guitar, and attempted to locate Sales Person. Cue bored, sullen, sulky, couldn't give a flying fcuk teenage oik salesgirl. The kind you want to punch in the gullet. Daddy Stunt pays by cheque. Oik gives him receipt, and off we trot back to Stunt Towers with my new shiny black guitar (which I incicidentally never learn to play because I am that lazy).

About to get out of car with Daddy Stunt, he takes his wallet out of his pocket, and finds that no only has oik given him receipt; she has also handed back his cheque. Daft munter actually bothered to ask him to write address of Stunt Towers on back of cheque. But they have now got no record of our address so guitar costs us owt.

Course Daddy Stunt, being the big gay bear that he is, says I still have to pay him for guitar. Until I mention that if he makes me I will tell Mommy Stunt, and she will march us back to the store to presumably pay for their error.

Moral of story - free guitar.

P.S. I love you Lt. Columbo!

Apologies for length. Going now to the A&E to have it removed.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 1:14, Reply)
My brother, Mustaffa Al-Jazeera

studied 5 months solidly, '20 ways to single handidly render a person unconscious'. Turns out he needn't of bothered, he was simply allowed to walk on the plane with a four inch knife.

EDIT: PS. the feeling is more than cutual mupid stunt
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 0:54, Reply)
Free carparking is fun. Went to Kidderminster last weekend with all its expensive 90p for an hour parking machines and they were all wankered. Gotta love those little hoodie chavs wrecking the parking machines. Must hug one next time I find one trying to rob my car.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 0:43, Reply)
My father suffers from the big C

On my birthday I got a do-it-yourself chemistry set. Nothing too technical or dangerous, but obviously the first thing I set about looking to make was some sort of bomb. I did....it was shit. After a while I started getting bored so I started messing about, and thought, hmmmmmm.......I wonder what colour urine turns if you boil it. Obviously this had to be a totally independent experiment if I was to get any reliable results, so I concluded that using my own piss would simply not be enough, so hence, I was forced to firstly ask....secondly request...and finally force my younger brother piss into a test tube too, otherwise this would just be a totally pointless experiment and a complete waste of time.

After I had collected my samples, then I had to boil my 2 tubes of wee wee. This involved me setting up a home made tripod over my gas cooker, which involved, sticky back plastic, several chopsticks and a strategically placed nutcracker. After several attempts I finally managed to accomplish this. I was ready to go. I turned my cooker on, I sat back, and I waited.

I waited......and waited.....and waited....and eventually became bored of waiting, so I decided to liven up the experiment. I added vinegar, shaving foam, pubic hair (fresh from the bath plug hole), and yoghurt, all along with a few other things. Nothing seemed to be happening. After 10 minutes I decided to abolish the experiment, and set about a new one. I slipped the concuction into my fathers cup of tea, sat down, and waited for a reaction.

One didn't come. My dad went to bed a few minutes later and I thought nothing more of it and concluded that this experiment had been a total waste of time. That is though, until he came back from the hospital a few days later. He had been there to have his weekly test to see how his cancer was doing. It turns out that he was completely cured of it. I remember him saying that he woke up on Saturday morning feeling like a new man, that he felt like he had been revitalised, that he felt like he had been born again. Then, I remembered....it was Friday night that I had spiked his drink with my 'formula'.

It seems, just out of the blue I had discovered a cure for cancer. I sat there........mesmorised........thinking.......Fuck, I've discovered a cure for cancer......then, I remember thinking........hang on, my mother in law's got cancer.......am I going to reveal my secret to the world, which would save hundreds, save thousands, save millions, save her?.......am I fuck.

Apologies for length but it just took so much time getting it all into a test tube without spilling any.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 0:41, Reply)
What fun
Just realised I'm an alcoholic sex maniac. What excellent good fortune! Just waiting for the party invites to come flooding in.
(, Sun 17 Sep 2006, 0:37, Reply)
I was once having an arguement over msn. (The shame...) And I was calling some kid an illiterate retard. However, I spooned up, and called him an illiterate betard instead. He hastened to point out my mistake. Google however, came to my rescue, and I kindly pointed out to him that it was a sly insult, comparing him to a zebra battery.(http://www.betard.co.uk/ has the answers.)

The good fortune however, goes further. Upon retelling this story, I was directed to this site. So there. Booya-Kasha.
(, Sat 16 Sep 2006, 23:42, Reply)
YAY, Nob Pills
Yippie, Ads for penile enlargement pills, no more strap-one for moi.
(, Sat 16 Sep 2006, 23:01, Reply)
i used to live in Montpellier in France, which is a town full of very fit women, mostly under 23

i went back for a week and met the fittest women in town. she ouldn't get enough of me and now we're married

and i don't have to live in france, cos she moved to england for me
(, Sat 16 Sep 2006, 22:57, Reply)
When I was little
My mum told me that while she and father went on holiday I would be staying with their friend Michael. I was a bit nervous about the whole affair really, Michael had always seemed a bit weird and although he had a theme park AND a monkey at his house there was still something not quite right and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I was genuinely scared of the guy. Then one day I had beeen drinking a lot of Jesus juice and one thing led to another and we ended up at it like rabbits. Turned out the weird feeling was just sexual tension and afterwards it was all good.
Unexpected good fortune? Well I went there expecting to be murdered and came out with a few unforgettable nights and a balloon.
As for length- surprisingly long and even more surprisingly black! I guess it's his way of preserving the past.
(, Sat 16 Sep 2006, 22:51, Reply)
I just left my boyfriend in Seville yesterday, so was feeling a bit sad on the plane home.. sitting next to 2 random strangers.. got robbed £1.75 for a fucking bottle of water (sparkling at that), but did get given a raffle ticket (and an extra one because i looked a bit sad) and low and behold I won in the inflight competition!!!! its for a free return flight with ryanair, i mean there are 3498349587345 terms+conditions but i think thats pretty lucky.
(, Sat 16 Sep 2006, 21:50, Reply)

This question is now closed.

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