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Advice sought
Just been abroad with no interent for 9 days and I get back to be confronted by an irate brother who has "accidently found" a post on a message board dissing him (the issue is a matter of opinion really). On checking the browser history it looks like he's been doing a fair bit of snooping. Obviously I'm a fool for trusting a shared computer without taking the necessary precautions, but I would like to get him back in some sneaky way that he wont necessarily notice. Any ideas? Also what's a good way to anonymise your internet use? I suspect a disgruntled ex-friend with a bit of techy knowledge has got involved so I'm not sure what I'm up against and need to be sure about getting my privacy back. Cheers!
(lost, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:12, archived)
just fucking give him a slap
next
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:13, archived)
I've met a quantity of awesomes this weekend
and had a week long holiday, nice one.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:13, archived)
Keep posting things that say "god my brother smells and is gay like THIS"
where "THIS" is a link to ilovehorses or lemonparty. Eventually he will get fed up of seeing these things.
(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:14, archived)
Get your own computer
and kick him in the face. He won't notice it's you if you knock him out with the first kick.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:14, archived)
Change all of his passwords.
Sign him up to loads of porn sites.

Stab him in the lung with a tramps cock.
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:14, archived)
Ha ha ha ha ha

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
WORD.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
How would you get the tramp cock sharp enough to pierce the ribcage?

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
Show it pictures of SEXY bins.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
Also this.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
Duh.
You take the lung out first.
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
Tell him not to be such a nosy cunt.

(MooCow_Byter, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:14, archived)
Stop bitching about family members online

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:14, archived)
Take off and nuke your brother from orbit.
It's the only way to be sure.
(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:14, archived)
Tell him to grow the fuck up.
Then grow the fuck up.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
I've seen what you've been saying about me!

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
I meant every word.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
There's only one way to resolve this.
TO THE BLANCMANGE POOL!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
Cor!

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
wobble wobble wobble

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
I'd like to have been in the band Blancmange
"how's your set?"
"sloppy"
"LOL"
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:20, archived)
No need!
Jesus I should have known better than to post about it here.. if you knew my bro you'd know the reasons but.. you just don't have a clue do you? Why the fuck do people on here insult each other with no reason? I had friends on the forum and my bro was dealing a large amount of coke from the family house causing a lot of disruption. At one point I thought I might get beaten up by thugs who he owed money to. So piss off!
(lost, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
Right ... so you've realised that you should have known better than to post about it here ...
and your solution to this is to post even more?

I represent the International Problem Solving League. Would you like a job?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:20, archived)
You really are a thicko.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:21, archived)
6 A-levels..
..and a scholarship from Cambridge here.. and a tendency not to let random insults slide when they are not meant in jest.

This will fall of the page in half an hour - no-one I know will find it. And thank god I don't know you.
(lost, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:24, archived)
Oh no.
You're not trying to show you're not thick by rattling off your qualifications are you?
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:25, archived)
BRING OUT THE GONGS!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:26, archived)
I wish I knew what that meant...
So instead... have a strikethrough....

G M
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:27, archived)
Internet jargonese.
Gong waving is when somebody brings up their qualifications (and medals and gongs) to support their argument.

Mongs might also work on here.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:30, archived)
Ah...
Never heard of that one before.
I have heard of the one for how long it takes the ranter to mention Hitler.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:32, archived)
Oh sir
Your subscription to Internet Tough Guy Magazine is here.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:26, archived)
Do you also make a lot of money at work?
Say £20k?

TEABOY!
(I helped save b3ta! OneSullenBrit *air sandwiches*, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:26, archived)
32k?
poly?
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:27, archived)
Sorry, meme faux-pas
It's been so long.
(I helped save b3ta! OneSullenBrit *air sandwiches*, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:28, archived)
:)

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:32, archived)
Those Cambridge corridors don't sweep themselves y'know

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:35, archived)
but still stupid enough to leave snidey messages in accessible public places.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:26, archived)
I suppose those A-levels must be a great comfort to you
when you're sitting jobless in your parents' house with no friends but booze.

Assuming you're not lying either here on in your profile.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:26, archived)
I really really respect you, as you're clearly very well learned.
However, you appear to be incapable of conducting an ordinary life with those qualifications, so they clearly don't mean shit.
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:27, archived)
Trans: "I'VE THROWN ALL MY TOYS OUT OF THE PRAM AND NONE OF MY QUALIFICATIONS WILL LEVITATE THEM BACK TO ME"

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:28, archived)
All those qualifications and yet you still fell into the trap of posting it here...
Despite your earlier post of 'I should have known better than to post about it here..'

All that inteligence, yet very little common sense if you knew what would happen
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:29, archived)
Are you going to delete the thread now?
It's all the rage with easily upset lurkers.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:24, archived)
Put a pillow over his face while he's asleep and suffocate him.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
When the police ask,
you can say it was suffocation sex that went wrong.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
Tell them the pillow did it.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
tell your mum on him.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
An apple pie bed. That'll learn him.

(I helped save b3ta! LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
Fuck his mum.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:15, archived)
How strange.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
YEAH, LIKE YOUR FACE.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
It is hard to comprehend just how much SEXY has been crammed into one face.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:17, archived)
I know, it is rather big, isn't it?

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
Shag his mum.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
Ho ho ho.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
We're fucking TREMENDOUS

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
I certainly am.

(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:17, archived)
SHOVE IT ROGHT UP YOU THEN, DICKNOSE

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
Install another browser and hide the link to it.
Use that as your browser.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Todd whee, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
Burst in when he's having a shower and fuck him up the arse

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
Pin him down and fart in his face.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:16, archived)
Rape a child.

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:17, archived)
Eradicate the jews dressed as him

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
delete all his porn

(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
why you always be dissing the brothers man?

(I helped save b3ta! scott,, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
Tell the internet.

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:18, archived)
Stop being 13.

(I helped save b3ta! well, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:19, archived)
IT'S SO UNFAIR!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:21, archived)
I recommend a course
of not slagging people off on the internet unless you're prepared to back it up in real life.

Swiflty followed a seminar on manning the fuck up and not worrying about petty stuff like that.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:20, archived)
BUT THE BROTHER IS A COKE DEALER.
Or a "cornershop owner" to the uninitiated.
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 14:21, archived)