mike woz ere's list is absolutely hillarious.
OFFICIAL JMG ENDORSEMENT.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:39, archived)

Seconded

( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:39, archived)

Mike..
www.b3ta.com/talk/3512796
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:48, archived)

Nice
I'm trying to track down Marcus' last words...
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:51, archived)

I found his flounce, but then Marcus wasn't actually a person, so I didn't include it.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:52, archived)

True
more the product of a warped mind.
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:56, archived)

YES!

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:52, archived)

THREE-WAY!
www.b3ta.com/talk/3226577
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 16:02, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/3100627
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 16:03, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/2985203
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 16:04, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/5382046
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 16:06, archived)

..and for everybody else
www.b3ta.com/questions/impulsebuys/post428043
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:51, archived)

Couldn't resist
www.b3ta.com/questions/impulsebuys/post428077
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:05, archived)

I still can't believe that Bob Todd had used jamrags in her pockets and she didn't know how long they'd been in there :(

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:39, archived)

I read that one and did a very big sad face.

( WHARRGARBL, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:41, archived)

I can understand the reasons for putting them in your pocket,
but if there's a period a month, it can't be that hard to remember when you put them in your pocket
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:42, archived)

Yep.
Strange woman she is.
( WHARRGARBL, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:43, archived)

To be fair
I have no idea what you're talking about, really, but I can't think of many better ways to thwart pick pockets.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

no pockets?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:46, archived)

Well, except that.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:51, archived)

When mentioning THE LIST, it is important to refer to it in capital letters.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:40, archived)

Hopefully it'll stop people complaining and begging to be on my list.
I feel you've missed a couple out, mind.

I can remember others quitting for ever and ever.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:41, archived)

I am calling on the help of everyone to compile a better list.
Gilgamesh has come through in fine fashion in providing a lot of the links to flounces.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:43, archived)

I'm pretty sure I've flounced once before.
I don't know how to search for it though
( WHARRGARBL, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

Roahneah,
probably every one of his posts.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:50, archived)

Ooh yes.
Him. Good call.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)

Roahneah loses all arguments since posting a photo of his cock stapled to a bit of wood.
/ac
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:54, archived)

I don't suppose you can remember a phrase he once uttered in fury to make it easier to find one of his flounces?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:57, archived)

Roahneah was the guy who has videos of himself wanking on some site, right?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:58, archived)

That narrows down /talkers
by about 30%
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:59, archived)

Oh wait....
www.b3ta.com/talk/6013825
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:04, archived)

I found prem1um's flounce:
www.b3ta.com/talk/3512796#post3512805
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:08, archived)

A few examples
www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/14592#post18953
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:01, archived)

Prem1um flounced like a big mary aswell.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:06, archived)

I agree,
there must be more examples though.

everyone click this www.b3ta.com/questions/impulsebuys/post427590
(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:40, archived)

There's enough girls in lingerie on the internet.
Just use images.google.com
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:40, archived)

There's never enough.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

Why are you hammering this?

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:41, archived)

For the same reason his grubby hand is down his pants, stroking little PsychoChomp.

( Druid, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:43, archived)

My hands are clean.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

little Psychochomp
is your pet name for your kid brother.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:48, archived)

So it will get to the top of the qotw
and when anyone ever defends qotw or is proud of winning, we can say "to win qotw you only have to say you'll show pictures of yourself"

that and girls and underwear and that.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:44, archived)

Oh
Right.
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

I'm going to stop now.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:47, archived)

www.b3ta.com/questions/impulsebuys/post428031
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:49, archived)

List?

( LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:41, archived)

www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=16234
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:43, archived)

Genius.

( LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

Oh dear

( WormuIus, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)

awesome

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:58, archived)

I just received my first random burn
Unfortunately, they're being delivered to me at work because I'm moving this week, so the team in charge of mail had to open it. The CDC that was waiting inside for them apparently caused lots of blushing.
( SuperMatt, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:43, archived)

I've received one
I got a lead, some stickers and a magnet with it. Dead happy. Now searching quickly for presents to put in with mine.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:44, archived)

Send your dignity.
No wait, you've already lost that.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

Such a lovely little prick, you really are.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:50, archived)

His eyes are half moons that have fallen over.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:52, archived)

Stop that now :(.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)

Hey dibble dibble,
You had a little fiddle,
Evel Knievel jumped over your moons,
The little mong laughed to see such fun,
And then BREEEEEOOOOOW *stunt ramps off your brie head* something something spoon.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:02, archived)

Well, before I pop him on ignore and lose this bit of the thread
Hello ickle Gumsy.

edit: and lose the other conversation up there. FFS. Right, I'll just have to look away, like when dogs are shitting.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)

:( you're going to ignore me?
this is sad times. I thought that's just how we spoke to each other.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:54, archived)

To be fair
she is possibly the easiest regular to wind up.

She's nice when she calms down though.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:56, archived)

Hactualyl I'm nice most of the time.
It's not that it upsets me, it's just there's a difference between a funny cunt and a cunt. One I have time for. *shrugs*

Let's all get involved, though.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:57, archived)

Yes, possibly
but it's an automatic fail if you start caring about the opinion of anyone online.

We're all fucking irrelevant and worthless the minute we post.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:59, archived)

So should I be caring about your automatic fail opinion?
Oh, never mind. I'm shit, you're all fabulous, fuck back off to question of the week or whatever people have fallen foul of the talk gods this week etc etc etc etc etc.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:02, archived)

Yeah, but you were funny with it
now you're just like a little baby gilgamesh.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:57, archived)

Gilgamesh, also known as Bilgames in the earliest text,[1] was the son of Lugalbanda and the fifth king of Uruk (Early Dynastic II, first dynasty of Uruk), ruling circa 2700 BC, according to the Sumerian king list. He became the central character in the Epic of Gilgamesh, one of the best known works of early literature, which says that his mother was Ninsun (whom some call Rimat Ninsun), a goddess. Gilgamesh is described as two-thirds god and one-third human.


( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:58, archived)

Oh ok.
I'll take a few steps back and find the line, then I'll stay just the right side of it.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:58, archived)

It gets old, being ignored or bitched at. You lot are nice to each other occasionally
but very rarely does that niceness reach me. Occasionally other qill be nice for a bit, but... meh.

Actually, I sound like a right whiner. I suppose if you're not in with the popular crowd, you're not, and lamenting that won't change anything. I just think it's a bit sad. I'm quite a nice person, or at least, my friends certainly seem to enjoy me, but if nobody's particularly bothered about getting to know me before they start the whole oh-so-funny, totally new and not old in any way cuntery then that's their decision, I guess.

Yes, sound like a right whiner. Well done.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:01, archived)

Wrong time of the month ?

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:01, archived)

Of course.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:03, archived)

I wouldn't repeatedly try to bully you if I didn't like your internet words.
Would you like an initiation ceremony while we all have tea and biscuits and watch some DVDs in our PJs?

If you do it while watching Hollyoaks, you might get gonzo to hold your hand.

God I started off not being a cunt with this post, but reading back it's still there.

Oh well.

Cheer up.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 16:03, archived)

I'd like to not be the easily picked on person because a few of you think I'm a dick
so everyone jumps on me as well (you know, you've seen it in playgrounds) but oh well.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:04, archived)

I dont think you're a dick
I think you're over-sensitive.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:06, archived)

Possibly.
I'd rather be over sensitive than a bully though. The simple fact is that people over here try desperately to upset each other (or me, anyway) and then go 'oh don't take it seriously' when anyone gets hurt.

Children do that. But yes, it's my problem, I know. It always is.

God knows 99% of /talk users wouldn't behave this way in front of people, which at least bullyish children aren't too pussy to do. I don't know. Never mind.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:08, archived)

Far too much emotional energy is being expended here.

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:11, archived)

Ello :)

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:58, archived)

BANG BANG BANG
IGNORE DRUMMMMMM
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:12, archived)

I know.
I'm just treating you how you deserve to be treated. Like shit.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:52, archived)

Why are you still single?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)

I don't know, I'm massively lovely.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)

The universe is full of mysteries

(PsychoChomp, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:54, archived)

Actually
the universe is mostly empty, so his life is hardly atypical.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:57, archived)

I've had three so far.
Two actual ones and one for organising it. YAY. And I got loot as well.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:50, archived)

:D

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:03, archived)

I got a good one from NinjaBadger, not a big poster as a user which is a shame as his was quite good :)
I will send him a thank you cartoon.

I'm sending mine out next week. they are going to be freaking EPIC
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:49, archived)

Lulu
Danni Minogue and Slade.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:55, archived)

Danni Minog...Minor...Manvogue...FAKE TITS AUSSIE....I like her in a dirty way.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:57, archived)

I fucking LOVE Slade

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:59, archived)

I can just see Noddy Holder
crosseyed, gurning, humping away at you like a fevered pug.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:01, archived)

I've got a hideous errection right now
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:04, archived)

Oh Lord.
Not in that way.

And I can see that too now. You fucking great shit house.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:04, archived)

One of mine is going to contain a copy of Viva Pinata.

( WHARRGARBL, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:58, archived)

I may flounce
just to get onto the list
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 15:53, archived)