w'sup niggers ?

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:52, archived)

that's not our word

(PsychoChomp, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:52, archived)

whatever you can force

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:52, archived)

ABERDEENS CHOLESTEROL!
Shut up.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:52, archived)

Pfft
ABERDEEN
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

LOLFAT

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

LOL

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

Oh the hilarity
do you not just burst out laughing every morning when you realise that you arent thin ?
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

Its about once an hour on average

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:58, archived)

Similarly
how do women ever get out of bed in the morning ? Why dont they just stay there and play with their tits and fannies ?
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

We do.
We just start early.
( thealternativefact, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

Well those nips and beans won't flick themselves.

( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

Nips and beans
Sounds like a scottish breakfast.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o' the nip 'n' bean-race!
Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o' a grace
As lang's my arm.
( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

*horns*

( thealternativefact, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

What ever the fuck that means...

( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

It means
"You're me bes mate pal, ah fuckin...wha ? Wha? Youse fucking callin me a poof ?"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:11, archived)

+
Och! You spilled ma Buckfast.
( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:13, archived)

I was actually thinking
that "Nips" is a Scots slang for a shot of whiskey.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

Set the alarm earlier than needed...

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

I dont think there are enough hours in the day
to play with womens tits and fannies.

I think you're all churlish and misguided for not spending your entire lives crosseyed and gushing.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

oh jesus.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

it's perfectly simple.
it's more fun in the shower.
( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

SOAPY TIT WANK !

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

slippery nipples.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:14, archived)

"slipples" if you will

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:15, archived)

WAHEY.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:15, archived)

god you fucking panda-trap.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:15, archived)

that's a cocktail isn't it?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:17, archived)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

is that it?

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:14, archived)

Marry me?

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

no. i dont think i am enamoured of the prospect of marriage. it sounds, quite frankly, a bit shit.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:15, archived)

Ok. No strings fun it is then.
*glomps*
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:15, archived)

there are always strings, just not woven into a sticky net.
*tickles*
( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:16, archived)

the girl speaketh the truth.

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:15, archived)

When I spend all day helicoptering and fingering my bumbit I get told off
bloody sexism :(
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:21, archived)

oh DG
the world isn't open-minded enough for you :(
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:21, archived)

eye nose :(

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:24, archived)

write to your MP
use those exact words
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:24, archived)

I'll have you know the stupid fat bint in my office actually has really good cholesterol levels
As she keeps telling me. Doesn't make up for the fact that everything else is wrong with her.
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

Yeah
it's like a mong saying "I have lovely hair"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

They've not moved that mirror away from your desk then?
AHAHAHAH LOOK AT ME BEING COOL AND SLAGGING OF ABERDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!

lOVE YOU REALLY.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

Topical humour!

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

Its funny because...
No... wait...
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

it's funny because I've made it over and over again.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

If that were the way things worked i'd be funny.

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

AND POPULAR!

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

You mean not everyone here loves me?
Oh no :( I'll go kill myself right now.
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

Can we then melt you down to provide the grease for all the deep-fat fryers in Aberdeen?
*joins bandwagon because he's unoriginal, dull and has nothing better to do*
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

The floor will fall out of the takeaway business in Aberdeen if me and Mykey did ourselves in.
I'd probably be found dead with enough kebab in my stomach to feed a family of 5 for a month.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

Thats the spirit!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

He'll go far this one.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

You're such a bitch to me
:(
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

I didn't mean it though.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

Still a bitch

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

www.ilovepickles.org/
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

Get a room

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:12, archived)

Haha
" Pickle Packers International, Inc."

Have you packed Pickle? Join the club!
( broadsword, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:21, archived)

Pfft.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:27, archived)

*sadface*

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

You jiiiiiive turkey.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

Sheeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

ah gats faaaaahve kids ta feed.
I should calm down.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

He's in the Disney film "Enchanted"
I was deeply saddened that he didnt say "Sheeeeiiiiiiit" in that : (
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:58, archived)

:(

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

You've got to SASS it.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

got your randomburn?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

shit i had forgotten about that.
MUST BURN THIS WEEKEND
( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

i've only received ONE so far
:(
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:01, archived)

I need to burn mine this weekend.
Although I don't think any of you are on my list.

I've only recieved one as well.
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

i havent received any, but then i wasnt sposed to yet.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

Yes I have.
I haven't listened to it yet. I'm not going to until I've sent mine out, out of a perverse, bafflingly-illogical courtesy. Mine will be delayed, due to unforeseen circumstances. So there. Sorry everyone.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

You got your cock stuck in the CD-RW drive mechanism?

( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

Hahaha, heard it in the voice.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

HELLO YOU
*rubs you right up*
( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

HELLO YOU.
I'm writing a letter to the KING. Well, Prince Philip.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

WOW. mention me in it. go on. say i said hi or something.

( sleepybinky, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

Tell him I thought he was quite the handsome chap in his youth.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

turkey bunny

*Mastermixes*
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 29 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

the sun

(rigby happened on (and with added toothache), Fri 29 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

depends on your position dunnit

(PsychoChomp, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

Standard.

( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 29 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

Stop your messin around
it's time to think of your future
aaa-aaaa-aaah
Time to straighten right out
or you'll wine up in jail
aaa-aaaa-aaah
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

k

( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:01, archived)

I have a cold

( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

Good

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

Good mornin' to ya.
I'll be on my way to Brighton soon, what pants shall I wear?
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 29 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

Gay ones

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:01, archived)

Will your mum's frilly knickers do?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:09, archived)

It's definitely three quarter length trouser weather

( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:01, archived)

I have full length ones
but they are loose and linen
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

What up white chocolate...

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

Can I get
any of you cunts a drink ?
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

I want to drink tea out of your bumhole
make you put your hand on your hip and use you like a giant tea cup.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

I'm a yoghurt spastic.
Yet again today I've managed to spill some on my top and trousers and so now look like I've been jizzed on.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

*mops brow*

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:07, archived)

HELL YEAH BITCH

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:09, archived)

You're really teasing the internet virgins today arent you ?

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:07, archived)

I have to entertain myself some how.
Still, jokes on them, I'm an interlard fat bird.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

DOUBLE LOL !
FAT AND TITS !
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:14, archived)

I NO RITE

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:22, archived)

I spilt some yoghurt on the sofa at my folks whilst myself and Mrs Moose were house-sitting.
It looked very dodgy, so I rearranged the cushions before Ma and Pa got back... Hopefully they won't discover it soon enough to think that it might have been our fault :S
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 29 May 2009, 10:09, archived)

Jizz in your mother in laws hair
to distract them.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

I like this plan very much

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:10, archived)