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ANGST!!!

apologies. i need a good rant.

i have this friend...she's my best friend ashally...has been for 15+ years.
she always makes these jokes about how much easier her life would be
if she were gay because we could totally date.
we've always joked about this...only problem is i'm not joking any more.
i realized recently that i have been completely in love with her since high school.
and there really isn't any chance of us being together...i realize this...
and it sucks...i really needed to rant.
you lot got nominated for the audience, because she also happens to be the
person i would normally rant to about such things.

i expect no replies...just needed to vent to someone.
have an alien by way of apology. his name is ralph.

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:18, archived)

I think you should write to Dr Mirriam for advice

She'll know what to do!

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:19, archived)

whozzat?

she sounds wise.
^_^

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:22, archived)

She's a tabloid agony aunt

with a penchant for stating the obvious and giving people bad news they already knew.

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:26, archived)

I do like Ralph though.

If that makes you feel even a smidgen better.

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:22, archived)

Indeed

Ralph looks friendly. Maybe he'll be our friend too.

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Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:23, archived)

He reminds me a bit

of Mushybees' stuff. (no small praise there)

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:29, archived)

Define "love"

Is it romantic love you feel? Or a deep, semi-obsessive platonic love for a friend?

And are you sure she's joking?

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:21, archived)

romantic love.

and yes.
:(

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:23, archived)

ralph is lovely.

and so are you - sorry situation but, as you probably already know, you'll get by it. face it, friends as good as yours are rare, and NOT being lovers can save a friendship. treasure the friendship, it's worth not ruining.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:23, archived)

i know.

thats why i'm not saying anything...
i have realized through conversations with others that
having my first actual relationship "like that" be with my
best friend would probably not be wise. tis hard though.

we've always joked that we're secretly soul mates.

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:25, archived)

of course, there is another problem....

(warning - don't read this if you are on the fence)

imagine in fifteen years you've both had failed relationships and she looks at you and says it all over again and you make mad passionate love and move in together and die in one another's arms when you're both ninety-three. you'd have wasted fifteen years of good fucktime before you got saggy!

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:31, archived)

hahahaha!

i heart you.
see this post.
^_-

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*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:33, archived)

if i ran a nursing home, i'd put shirts on the old people that read "i wasted fifteen years of good fucktime before i got saggy!"

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:35, archived)

I'd wear one!

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:37, archived)

*puts the shirt on him, feeds him the gruel of the day*

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:52, archived)

*coughs*

It's still got those 'sprinkles' I didn't like last time.

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:57, archived)

It eats the gruel that's given him

or else it gets the hose again.

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:58, archived)

I'm beginning to see a correlation

between getting the hose and the amount of sprinkles.

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:08, archived)

more alzheimers for you.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:59, archived)

Fucking hell, man!

Alzheimer's AND gruel!? I'll never fit in my bikini at this rate!

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:10, archived)

you've got beaky knees.

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:13, archived)

It's a bloody MEDICAL CONDITION.

stop teasing me!

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:16, archived)

"No, I don't remember anything, either"

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:23, archived)

This is sound advice indeed - in general.

However, it may not necessarily help in
f o o f's specific situation. Atleast, not in the way f o o f wants.

It was some good thinking though.

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:27, archived)

yay!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:28, archived)

hahaha

that made me fucking laugh so hard...

RAWK!

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*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:30, archived)

my kitties are pleased to have gleed you, miss.

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:32, archived)

Your pussies rock!

(how are they getting on?)

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:40, archived)

super, we're adding another shortly too.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:51, archived)

*air punches*

Sadly, I left mine with the missus. I miss her so much!

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:59, archived)

mine are with my ex now too, but i still see them lots.

the entire last two weeks i was housesitting for him, it was a pussy party (and a dog).

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:01, archived)

That's SOME hen night!

Glad to hear you are still getting along (same with me and the missus).

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:06, archived)

best of friends, ashally.

hence i was somewhat conflicted in my advice to foof.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:10, archived)

Sounds great!

How come you split up? Did he get tired of you swatting him with the newspaper when he dragged his ass across the carpet?

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:15, archived)

after his limbs grew back, i no longer found him attractive.

ashally it was simple - we just realised we were better friends than as a couple. the transition was easy.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:22, archived)

Similar with me.

I'm really glad of it, too. She's a really nice person, but too different.

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:25, archived)

eh, we all grow - and grow apart. if we can stay friends, we've accomplished a lot.

i'm glad to be single again, my inner predator is pleased.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:30, archived)

This, on both counts.

The world does not yet realize what has been unleashed.

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:36, archived)

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:35, archived)

My dreams come true!

I've wanted to watch her rubbing her pussy for ages.

(

Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 8:27, archived)

I was going to say that.

EVERYONE!

(

Sir Pigeon Nipples Did you sit in some sugar?, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:45, archived)

G'night, sir!

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:46, archived)

Still Fucking Class.

'Ning Sir!

(

Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:10, archived)

Ahoy, spunky foreigner!

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:18, archived)

Tough call there. I can empathise with you.

MY OPINION: I'd talk to her about it. It'll be better to have it out in the open and won't make the relationship feel uncomfortable. (Well, it's probably going to feel a bit uncomfortable either way, but at least if you talk about it it'll feel uncomfortable for the right reason). If she's known you for 15 years, she probably suspects it anyway. Listen to what other people suggest. There are a pretty good group of people on here, even if they sometimes seem like juvenile pervs. ;-)

And sincerely, best of luck in retaining the friendship, whatever you decide.

/edit: and Ralph is ace!

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:25, archived)

^ this

And postbear's. Keep it friendship.

And remember, friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:27, archived)

hahaha!

i want that on a shirt...

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:31, archived)

www.buzzymultimedia.com/real-friends-tshirt.html
-or-
www.foulmouthshirts.com/funny-t-shirts/funny/Friends%20help%20you%20move%20real%20friends%20help%20you%20move%20bodies%20T-shirt.htm

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:38, archived)

I quite liked this one...

www.foulmouthshirts.com/offensive-t-shirts/Retarded%20people%20make%20better%20sex%20slaves!%20T-shirt%20-%20Offensive%20T-shirts.htm

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Sir Pigeon Nipples Did you sit in some sugar?, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:50, archived)

I have one of the classic 'handicapped' (wheelchair) symbol

but it's headless.

The shirt says "International Symbol for Needs More Head".

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:12, archived)

hee hee...thanks...

i think i'm actually take the doting-friend-not-saying-anything-that-would-make-
things-weird-but-is-secretly-hoping-you-turn-gay-some-day route...
lol

yeah...i like the folks on here...most of them...
b3ta is actually the place where i "came out" for the first time...

that is so sad...

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:29, archived)

not sad at all.

merely a fact of modern life - we are often more forthright online where the repercussions are less personal.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:34, archived)

Haha!

I'm bi with a foot out of the closet. (I leave the rest of it coiled up on the closet floor like a proper gentleman.)

If you do infect her with the gay, I'm going to go ahead and call bagsies on b3ta response #2 and #3.

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:36, archived)

We see that cheeky little foot peeping out!

I'm, boringly, rather towards the hetero end of the sexuality grey scale. However, I've been informed I have a very nice arse by some gentleman friends.
/flaunts

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:39, archived)

I don't understand 'little foot'

Are you referring to those tiny 'metric inches'?

;-)

G'wan! Pop a pic of your backside? We're all trained professionals. This is the official hazing dare, since you're less than a b3ta-year old.

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:44, archived)

I dare not

Even behind a link, the hormonal fallout from all genders could be catastrophic.

And I already got a mod edit a few nights ago for animating a pic of Jessie's bare bottom.

edit : And your bum looks pert. Do you walk much?

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:50, archived)

how did I miss her bare bottom?

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:52, archived)

Found it!

www.b3ta.com/board/6261607

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Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:26, archived)

LOL That's the one.

She and I were involved in the longest-running game of Truth or Dare in the history of the internet over webcam. That was my dare for her.

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:32, archived)

Who won?

And... erm... any more pics of her body parts? :)

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Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:36, archived)

I'm pretty sure it was a tie*.

(and not that I'd share without her permission.)

*after two years running

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:39, archived)

don't tell anyone, but...

...here.

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:44, archived)

Hot damn

She needs a shave.
And smoking is bad for you!

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:50, archived)

GC*

*greencock, obviously, though I have seen it before.

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:51, archived)

Was it the one with Kop Kops stuck on?

Not really. I just have a fucking excellent ass*.

*not really that excellent, it was just a good angle, I suppose?

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:23, archived)

Here's mine....

(

Sir Pigeon Nipples Did you sit in some sugar?, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:56, archived)

I could never do that

I'd get sasquatch hunters camped outside my house...

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:59, archived)

you will be mine.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:04, archived)

I waited for my latest 'big round number' post to subject humanity to my ass.

www.b3ta.com/board/7613537 if you're really a glutton for punishment.

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:03, archived)

Hahaha! That's excellent!

I did one for my 20K-ith

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:28, archived)

heh.

my 10k nudie.

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 6:03, archived)

You peeled off a bit much clothing, didn't you?

(

Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 6:08, archived)

Poor f o o f

I feel for you, hon. Even though I'm usually the guy on b3ta who comes running in the room with the camera and the tripod (you know, in case i'm invited to join in), I can sympathize with you. Whether gay or straight, it comes down to 'how do you approach your friend and tell them you want to be more than that'. The easiest answer is that you can't. At least not right off. You're better off finding another person to be attracted to in the short run. Advantages to that include no loss of best-friendship if turned down, the opportunity to see if you enjoy 'playing for the other team', and the possibility that your friend may become jealous and realize she feels the same way.

Sorry for the long winded response.

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:42, archived)

Appology hardly necessary.

Well said, and sound advice.

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:46, archived)

Thank you

and, uh, cute ass. ^^

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Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:47, archived)

hmm...

i do like that whole jealousy bit...
^_-

/selective reading

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:46, archived)

(that's why I saved that benefit for last)

It is the best of all possible outcomes.
;-)

EDIT: BTW, where in the USA are you? Anywhere near the New England area?

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:48, archived)

nopers...

idy-ho.

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:53, archived)

Would that be your own private one?

* hopes you understand that one, or I'm going to look one heluva lot older than I already do *

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:56, archived)

underground, like a wild potato.

(

postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:58, archived)

Yet another movie ruined by the leaden Keanu Reeves.

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:01, archived)

whoa.

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postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:09, archived)

heehee

not seen it but i know what you are talking about...
i am just anti-keanu.

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:07, archived)

f o o f the poof!

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Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:10, archived)

ra'ar!

lo, SSG!

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:15, archived)

I CANT SLEEP AND I MIGHT BE LOSING MY MIND

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Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:16, archived)

SO NOTHING NEW THEN?

^_-

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*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:19, archived)

I GUESS NOT

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Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:28, archived)

yikes

serious answer: postbear's right, better to leave it be and not chance ruining the friendship.

unserious answer: get her to have a threesome with you and another guy, even if it seems it's about the guy, you'll technically have had sex with each other

that should break the ice

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:37, archived)

is that floppy dick, err disc this month's icon?

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Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:54, archived)

Ace grumpypus!

No advice, as I'd more likely say 'stick it in her pooper',
than something constructive. [/;-D

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:39, archived)

Can always trust you to come up with sound advice.

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Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:46, archived)

heehee...

you said pooper...

*giggles*

(

*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:46, archived)

aww bless, you still write your age using fractions

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Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:44, archived)

Shhh!

She's at a sensitive age. Don't mess with them during their formative years. You'll make them gay.

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Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:48, archived)

*genuine LOL*

she could wait till christmas, go to a party or set one up, then when all are drunk, really drunk, try out a mistletoe kiss

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Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:52, archived)

*ninjaedits*

noooooo...that is so last week...
^_^

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*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:52, archived)

Saw it before that!

Silly girl!

(

Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:54, archived)

teeheehee

if we're talking ages & fractons, 33.91 feeling old, someone shop me a turbo zimmer frame!

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:57, archived)

HAHA GAY LOL

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Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:08, archived)

LOL

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*f o o f* is a craft-aholic, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 5:15, archived)

Whimmy wam wam Wozzle!

And all will be ok. If shes a true friend, and she sounds like she is, then she'll understand. I have a similar situation with a girl everyone thinks is really suited to me, and we're really good friends, but I was young and shallow and missed my chance...

The passionate side of me is saying "Take the chance! You'll never know for sure otherwise!"

And none of this is probably helping...

_sorry.

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Mr.Ons knows you can hear him, Earthmen., Mon 1 Oct 2007, 6:28, archived)