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From the New Cockney Rhyming Slang challenge. See all 331 entries (closed)

(

rhuby, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:30, archived)

ooohhh

niceley done, that could catch on.
WYH

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:31, archived)

you were in my dream the other night

(but not in a dubious way). you were american for some reason and wouldnt stop talking to robert redford. that was about it. odd :)

(hazey, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:33, archived)

And that's

not dubious?

(

Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:37, archived)

what being american and talking to robert redord?

nah, its just, well, crap. my dreams are either very rubbish or, more commonly, deeply disturbing and frightening. dreams are rubbish for me.

(hazey, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:39, archived)

I have odd dreams

that go on for hours.
More often than not the board is involved in some way.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:40, archived)

that's cos

your brain is wired directly into the board

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:41, archived)

We're all a figment

of his imagination.

Sick fucker.

(

Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:42, archived)

they sound alright.

i had a horrid scary dream the other night. and the one i had a couple of weeks back was one of the most disturbing ive ever had. why cant i just have dreams about boobies or something....? no fair...

(hazey, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:42, archived)

my dreams involve uploading

information and waiting for responses to be processed - usually spend lots of dream time selecting folks with the bucket n mop marquee tool

(

rhuby, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:47, archived)

I once dreamt I was a US Coloniam Marine

being attacked by a face-hugger. I woke up back in my bed, only to be attacked by a face-hugger.
I woke up again in my bed an have never played Alien V Predator since. Dreams in dreams are very bad.

(

bigdave, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:55, archived)

Ouch

that is all

(

Ijon Tichy, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:02, archived)

I've been circular

sawed in half before in my dreams. don't wory about them, they are usualy just filing the crap TV that had been asimilated from the night before.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:40, archived)

oooo thats nasty

ive had some minging dreams the past couple of weeks. normally have a smoke at night, which seems to stop me having dreams. which is a bonus considering how horrific they usually are....

(hazey, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:48, archived)

poor you!

I have found that now I am more settled they have stopped and aromatherapy and mood music often helps. I don't watch late night TV and read nice sweet books before I nod off.
anyway thats what has helped me.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:51, archived)

i can imagine being more settles helps

i doubt my reading material helps cos i read a lot about the psychology of men in war and the psychology of combat in general (that makes me sound like a psycho, but im just interested in what goes through peoples brains in that situation cos i could never do it). I dont really watch late night tv so i dont know why im plagued with them. maybe need to relax mesel a bit mroe....

(hazey, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:57, archived)

Look at some nice

pictures of Kittens or something.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:00, archived)

I recommend

falling asleep listening to Classic FM - it's very relaxing.

NB: However, being blasted awake by Also Sprach Zurathrasta at 3am is very disturbing.

(

Ijon Tichy, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:07, archived)

when I tried to stop smoking draw

I found my mind was filled with the most disturbing dreams.
I decided being a bit dozy in the morning thanks to smoking into the night, was far better than being freaked out by how strange my dreams are when I remember/have them.
Like my dream about shagging a life sized teddy bear

(

Pootle, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:25, archived)

i've dreamt about marrying my girlfriend

twice in a week. and both times, something went hideously wrong (first time i was about half an hour late, second time we realised at the last minute that we'd not invited our friends).

paging dr freud...

(martian, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:39, archived)

I think it means

you fancy your mum.

(

Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:41, archived)

LOL

Eat more prunes, it'll give you the shits AND giggles.

(BurningFeetMan, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:43, archived)

are you planning to marry her?

did u forget to turn up last saturday maybe?

(

rhuby, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:48, archived)

but

dreaming about marriages that go wrong is good. No, really, I read that somewhere the other week. I can't remember what sort of good, but good, definitely.

Which is lucky really...

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:57, archived)

blimey!

cos I'm pretty crap at a us accent and I am proud to be a white english hindu.
and so many people are woried about being a minority.
*arf*

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:39, archived)

You make me smile.

I'm White!
I'm Hindu!
I'm Proud!

me,
I'm White!
I have no real belief or religion!
I'm a bit of a worrier and wracked with doubt about my own talents!

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:43, archived)

well

it was a bit of a joke.
but hey I love laughing at who I am and thinking yep, I can be proud of that!

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:44, archived)

Good,

yo have found your place in the world.
I'm still wandering round looking puzzled and feel strangely drawn to the fridge.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:46, archived)

that case you must make fridge art.

go on, a mini challenge.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:48, archived)

Good Idea!

I shall scan in the contents of my fridge and have a play!

But not tonight, I have other creative plans a foot.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:53, archived)

But if you are positively stroked

Like so: *ruffles fur*
Then you am Happy!

(

Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:45, archived)

*hehe*
mind don't rub him up thr wrong way. His fur will chaffe and he'll be grumpy all afternoon.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:46, archived)

True,

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:47, archived)

That's coz you're crap!

Oh, all right - you're not really.
Here, come and sit back down - have a tissue.
I'll just go and make a nice cup of tea...

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:45, archived)

Biscuits?

Mini Donuts?
Waffles?
Cookies?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:48, archived)

Waffles

Lots and lots of waffles

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:57, archived)

Those ones we had

last week were too sweet for me, my gums still haven't recovered.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:59, archived)

Or your fingers

Apparently. Still suffering from the sugar rush, eh?

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:01, archived)

Me?

No,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,.

I'm not.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:04, archived)

This must be one

of the longest threads I've ever seen.
FACT.

Probably

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:11, archived)

Nah,

I've seen some in my time.
They get all thin as you near the edge of the board.
Which for us, is good.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:13, archived)

It's great.

There's loads of stuff appearing at the top of the board, but most of the comment is down here.
It's like having your own bar at the pub.

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:18, archived)

Thats the problem,

you get into a nice conversation and it drops off the bottom into the spaz.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:19, archived)

This is a good thread

www.b3ta.com/board/642714

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mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:19, archived)

It was.

That did make oi laaarrfff.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:21, archived)

Ooh, but that's a monster

Went to your site last night.
Love the flash stuff! Woo to you.

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:24, archived)

You went to Mnb's site!

How could you...after all we've been through!
Did Pontefract mean nothing?!?

I feel so used.

*sob*

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:26, archived)

I'm a slut

What can I say?

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:29, archived)

How about sorry!

I'm not sharing my tent with you on the 12th...I'll find someone else to share with!

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:31, archived)

Oh, all right then

Sorry.

*pulls face*

Loooooooooooooooooooooooooser!!!!!

you're lovely really

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:34, archived)

Your words are

empty.
Pah!

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:35, archived)

really?

someone has visited my site?
wow.
thanks for the prasie mr p.

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:29, archived)

That's right,

rub it in.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:30, archived)

I loved

The this is your life thing.
Simply brilliant!

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:31, archived)

That's

fucking classy. Love it.

(

bob dinosaur, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:30, archived)

You're only a Hindu

'cos most of their gods look like entries from a b3ta challenge.

Hmm... idea.

(

Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:44, archived)

i had a terrible night's sleep

i was on the board till late, and kept dreaming about it like it was a real physical thing. i was walking along it and meeting b3tans and stuff.

oh, i also dreamt about chips

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:39, archived)

sounds

like good dreams.
I kept rolling over to find munkt0n. :)
me happy.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:41, archived)

the dreams themselves were ok

it's just that i kept waking up every half hour :(

ahhh what are you two doing on friday (or is that info nsfw?)

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:44, archived)

erm

staying in and lighting the church candles on the sconces next to my bedknobs and broomsticks style bed.
welcome to hug central
nuf said.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:47, archived)

scones?

cheese?

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:48, archived)

candle

holders are
called sconces. Or at least these ones are.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:52, archived)

these are the sort of things

only women know :)

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:58, archived)

argh!!!

I love cheese scones... I'm going to have to make some now...

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:56, archived)

ooh can i have some?

i love em too

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:57, archived)

they'll be warm out the oven

half an hour after I drag myself away from her (if I ever do!)

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:59, archived)

lovely

do you pronounce it scOnes or, er, scons?

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:01, archived)

scon

scoan is just silly ;)

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:03, archived)

me too, although i tend to alternate pronunciations.

living in the midlands i'm a cross between northern and southern ways of speaking

(

pip, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:05, archived)

I'm Scots

so it's just scone... unless you mean the place, then it's pronounced scoon...

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:10, archived)

Oooh, I love em too.

send me some, go on.
And in return I'll..um...send something to you...a cd or something with some songs on it.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:58, archived)

I'll bring some

to b3taf3st... (remember and phone about the field) and some chocolate bread too. I'm making hot x buns next week too

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:00, archived)

Jade, Jade, Jade, Jade

Jade Viper
She liked to cook buns.
Jade, Jade, Jade, Jade
Jade Viper
They never gave you the runs.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:06, archived)

arf!

daftie :)

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:12, archived)

ooooooooooooooooh

nice

(

M@rkoni, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:32, archived)

There's nothing on top but a bucket and a mop

and an illustrated book about birds.

(

HP hasn't been here in aaaaaages, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:33, archived)

what's that from?

(

new_matt, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:33, archived)

Some song or other

It's on Nirvana unplugged, but I think they're covering it.

(

HP hasn't been here in aaaaaages, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:34, archived)

plateau

(Obi Wan Jonobi, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:37, archived)

The Meat Puppets

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Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:40, archived)

Hey, I found this really funny site

www.hatsofmeat.com

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Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:42, archived)

menub!

get the twocking stick and the lynching rope! ;)

(

new_matt, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:46, archived)

www.isthatreal.com?

(

Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:46, archived)

www.no.com

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:49, archived)

Glass(ock

I'm afraid...

(

WhoElse I'm what Willis was talking about, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:53, archived)

What's

glasscock?

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Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:59, archived)

I have no idea what these

people are talking about.
Anyone seen this!!!!!!!1
www.b3ta.com

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mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:10, archived)

Yeah

it's shit.

(

Baz Fuck off, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:18, archived)

Alright Open up!

Don't pretend you're not in there!
Inspector Moon of the Loon patrol 'ere - you're all nicked!

*Loud Hailer Crackle*

Put down the mouse and step away from the keyboard!

(

The_Intriguing_Mr_P, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 12:28, archived)

that's great,

that is.

(martian, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:35, archived)

Woo

truly in the spirit of rhyming slang - here:
'Ave a banana!

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JustHere4Coffee remembers when all o' this were car parks, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:36, archived)

I saw that as

mop & bucket = a common phrase among those who can't be arsed to do stuff......
sorry

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Ril3y is a brit abroad.. bring on the Stella / Asahi, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:41, archived)

like 2 tears in a bucket

fuck it. - hadnt thought of that one :)

(

rhuby, Mon 10 Feb 2003, 11:50, archived)