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This is a link post King Kurt

(SockCooker ПТН ПНХ, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 12:55, Reply)
This is a link post Your Bathroom Holidays I made this!
Visit the number one resort this Summer holidays: 'Your Bathroom'.

Contains a little botttom. But I guess everyone is working from home now, so SFW.

Best wishes to all of you.
(Pig Face Turnip I know a little German. He's over there., Tue 24 Mar 2020, 9:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Haha
Great!
 (mrmenfolk, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 11:56, Reply)
This is a normal post
Ta!
 (Pig Face Turnip I know a little German. He's over there., Tue 24 Mar 2020, 12:20, Reply)
This is a normal post Haha brilliant!

(I helped save b3ta! fred zeppelin II: Electric Boogaloo, Wed 25 Mar 2020, 7:41, Reply)
This is a normal post
fank you.
 (Pig Face Turnip I know a little German. He's over there., Wed 25 Mar 2020, 9:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Nice x

(Sherbs, Fri 27 Mar 2020, 0:09, Reply)
This is a normal post
Ta!
 (Pig Face Turnip I know a little German. He's over there., Fri 27 Mar 2020, 13:05, Reply)
This is a normal post Please
Make a whole video of the gentleman singing Sweet Caroline. It's the most hauntingly beautiful rendition I've ever heard. I want to hug him :)
 (CoffeeBlackTrashWhite, Sat 28 Mar 2020, 23:35, Reply)
This is a normal post
He is very hugable. I'll ask Mark (the man with the angel's voice) if it's OK to upload.
 (Pig Face Turnip I know a little German. He's over there., Mon 30 Mar 2020, 8:49, Reply)
This is a link post First Novel (Canada, 1958)
"A young man gives up a steady job to tackle the uncertain task of writing for a living."

Contains hand shaking, people queuing too close to each other, and a main character with the novel bug
(I helped save b3ta! Mudface The web isn't callipygian, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 6:42, Reply)
This is a link post Bored? Wanna play a video game with me?
It's like worms. Do the tutorial then hit me up.
Flash. Oldschool.
 (SockCooker ПТН ПНХ, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 5:14, Reply)
This is a link post It finally happened
WE'RE IN LOCKDOWN!!
(I helped save b3ta! Ambegris likes his tea stirred anti-clockwise, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 23:10, Reply)
This is a normal post De-RIS
www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtZR-IpLEB4
 (I helped save b3ta! buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 4:51, Reply)
This is a link post And today's biggest arsehole competition prize goes to

(I helped save b3ta! tarka_dall Like normal dall, only a bit more spicy, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 22:00, Reply)
This is a normal post Words fail to describe the stupidity of it.
Drilling holes in ambulance tyres, really?
He should have used a knife, much quicker.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tusk knows where you live, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 23:05, Reply)
This is a normal post Knife or knives but no knive.

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 23:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Thanks for pointing that out
I'm not a native English speaker, so I genuinely appreciate these pointers.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tusk knows where you live, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 23:20, Reply)
This is a normal post :)
We didn't think there were enough irregular verbs, so we made some irregular noun plurals.
 (I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 23:43, Reply)
This is a normal post A single stalk of chives is a chife

(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 4:06, Reply)
This is a normal post A single chife won't chafe,
but a large bunch of chives will chave.
 (Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 24 Mar 2020, 10:23, Reply)
This is a normal post and a pair of briefs
is a brieves, as in the movie title, the pelican’s a brieves
 (ozof, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 11:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Sheeps and monies are perfectly cromulent plural forms in certain circumstances
But I’m not going to tell you what they are :P
 (I helped save b3ta! jonbob loves you, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 19:03, Reply)
This is a normal post We can only hope the moron is so stupid
That he proudly posts a video to social media.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 23:19, Reply)
This is a normal post Those Halfords pricks will stop at nothing

(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 4:08, Reply)
This is a normal post Flatten the curve, not tyres

(I helped save b3ta! Mudface The web isn't callipygian, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 6:15, Reply)
This is a normal post I'll raise you an arsehole
boingboing.net/2020/03/23/winner-of-the-creepiest-covid.html
 (gijoel, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 23:42, Reply)
This is a normal post And what exactly are the staff meant to do with them?
When I did supermarket work, out on the floor we would face the occasional random "okay, empty your pockets right now" with two managers present. If you had stock, cash or a mobile on you it was instant dismissal.
 (97800, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 18:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Also, it would melt.

(97800, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 18:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Shove it up your arse.
You'll get the unique thrill of shoving something up your arse, and then when it melts you can just claim to have diarrhoea.
 (Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Mon 23 Mar 2020, 19:19, Reply)
This is a normal post Hence the toilet paper shortage

(I helped save b3ta! Tusk knows where you live, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 20:19, Reply)
This is a normal post Are we talking a dairy milk
or the full 200g Galaxy*, sideways?



*allegedly chocolate
 (I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Mon 23 Mar 2020, 22:58, Reply)
This is a normal post Toblerone...

(I helped save b3ta! Happosai _,,,,_(O ; o)_,,,, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 0:49, Reply)
This is a normal post yorkie bar, otherwise it would be gay

(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 4:09, Reply)
This is a normal post "It's not for gays", member

(97800, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 7:30, Reply)
This is a normal post
reminds me of an old joke. A British brigadier was visiting the troops in the Sudan.
"Tell, me Sergeant-Major, what do the men do here for diversion, being no women at the fort"
"Well sir, Lance Corporal Ponsonby over there likes to fuck camels"
"Camels, do you say? Male or female camels, Sergeant-Major?"
"Oh, female camels, sir. Nothing queer about Ponsonby"
 (I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 9:23, Reply)
This is a link post places to visit this weekend

(stoodles non-bio, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 16:59, Reply)
This is a link post Questions for Royal Albert Hall I made this!
*Not made by myself, but a good friend asked me to put it here as he doesn't have an account.

He would love to answer as many silly questions as possible, so please someone ask about where Hitler's bollock is stored.
(I helped save b3ta! ProjectWeasel The Bird is the Word, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 14:58, Reply)
This is a normal post I don't do twitter, so I'll ask it here
If you turn the Albert hall upside down and held it under Niagara falls, how long would it take to fill up, and how much energy would it take to then boil an egg in it?
 (I helped save b3ta! Tusk knows where you live, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 20:18, Reply)
This is a normal post Is the hall actually called Albert?
I understand that it is named after Albert, but is its name ALSO Albert? Like, its own name. If you were to meet the hall socially.
 (Jimbotfu Bummed in the gob again, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 22:25, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes, but Albert is its surname.
Its first name is, of course, Royal.
 (Pie of Meat ___°¬¯O¯____\o/_____/\_,____Y¯¯Y, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 0:33, Reply)
This is a normal post
i thought albert was its middle name and hall was its surname
 (Scienti read a strong opinion on the internet on, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 2:55, Reply)
This is a normal post No its great grandmother was an Albert and its great grandfather a Hall.
Because its great grandmother was in the aristocracy (yes, it was those Alberts you're thinking of), they went for the double barreled surname.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Tue 24 Mar 2020, 15:03, Reply)
This is a link post Fight Corona (to the tune of My Sharona) I made this!
After I posted this I noticed someone in the US had already done a My Corona parody last month (far more professionally, with a proper video and everything), but, well, things have moved on...
.
(merkinhead poos sideways, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 8:28, Reply)
This is a link post biology is hard
imgs.xkcd.com/comics/exa_exabyte.png
Exa-Exabyte




 (I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 19:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Damn.
There goes the 100% population good behaviour run.
Give up all hope.
Oh, and execute her.
 (roysin, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 18:50, Reply)
This is a normal post Is that legal?

(Hubert Blaine Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorff, Sr., Sun 22 Mar 2020, 18:55, Reply)
This is a normal post
Highly unlikely
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 19:33, Reply)
This is a normal post I hope not,
But I’ve known a fair few landlords take the attitude “I do what I like until I’m challenged, and then fight it” and they seem to be shit-scared of people with illnesses, in case they die in situ.
I was given a section 21 when I had my diagnosis of blood cancer, but I was given 2 months to find alternative accommodation.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 19:47, Reply)
This is a normal post Are these related bits of information.
I mean... how did your landlord know?
 (eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 8:42, Reply)
This is a normal post Maybe I shouldn’t have told her but given I had paid every month on time (with a standing order) for over 10 years
And her apparent friendliness over twice yearly inspections etc, I thought we had a better working relationship than we had. So when I was temporarily away living with relatives while having treatments I kept her informed (while keeping up rent) since it was paid for but uninhabited with my furniture etc there, and she let slip of her worries (once I told her it was incurable but “only” a chronic condition so I was moving back) then with a section 21 appearing which needs no reason it was pretty obvious.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 9:00, Reply)
This is a normal post Shit stunt to pull on you.

(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Mon 23 Mar 2020, 11:22, Reply)
This is a normal post What a horrible bitch.

(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 12:11, Reply)
This is a normal post No
The government has made it illegal to evict a tenant for the next three months, at least for non-payment of rent. I imagine evicting a key worker for no reason is even more illegal.

Yes, you don't have to pay rent for three months if you like, although you will have to pay it back after that so no free rent, just deferred.

Same with the mortgage of the landlord, they can not pay it for three months.
 (I helped save b3ta! My Name was saying these words inside your head on, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 9:21, Reply)
This is a normal post Isn’t that ‘about to be introduced’ though?
So the landlady was preempting it.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 9:41, Reply)
This is a link post trainguy

(stoodles non-bio, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 17:10, Reply)
This is a link post Pub quiz tonight at 7PM via Twitch
(and, probably, every night)
You can play in teams, and answer on a Google Doc, and get it marked, if you want.


 (SockCooker ПТН ПНХ, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 16:56, Reply)
This is a link post missing your commute ?? I made this!
i started this project 7 years ago, now confined to my home, ive finished it!
(pi bennett, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 10:58, Reply)
This is a normal post hope you get to do an extended version
Could there be an underground song in the style of the Are you being served theme?
 (Mehitabel_Itrang, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 16:50, Reply)
This is a normal post Shame you didn’t include Docklands
Then you could have sung Mudchute.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Sun 22 Mar 2020, 17:15, Reply)
This is a link post Social Distancing Flipbook
Covers it nicely...preview image ruins it a bit.
(I helped save b3ta! Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Sun 22 Mar 2020, 10:37, Reply)
This is a normal post Is the "it's ok, you can look at my butt" thing a meme
Or derivative of

youtu.be/1mHGxxWJY28

Or is it the same person?
 (I helped save b3ta! gaijintendo Regular Member, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 8:36, Reply)
This is a normal post From the description:
Flipbook inspired by Juan Delcan ‘s “Safety Match’ ( a simple, beautiful, critically important animation) and Kirsten Lepore ‘s ‘Hi Stranger’...(in my opinion, one of the most charmingly odd/sincere/unique animations ever made...it’s made me tear up a time or two...we all need this calming voice right now...thanks Garrett Davis for that voice)
 ([sic] You're ad here?, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 11:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Embedding losses the nuance
Should have tried harder than looking at the usernames.
 (I helped save b3ta! gaijintendo Regular Member, Mon 23 Mar 2020, 11:56, Reply)

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