How does this work?
At some kind of after-gig party, Lemmy (of ye Motorhead fame) makes a pass at the wife of the landlord of our favourite pub. She doesn't quite spurn his advances as fast as she should.

Landlord punches Lemmy hard in the face, who consequently leaves party with swollen lip etc (see he's not so hard after all). I see everything........

From that day on, it is forbidden to put "Ace of Spades" on the jukebox in the pub. Consequently it is played every five minutes when Landlord is in the bar - "Oooh - is that Motorhead? What a great song..... etc."
( groovegenerator The man who mistook his wife for his wife, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 15:13, Reply)

Cinematic
My granddad gets blackjacked by Frankie Howerd in "The Great St Trinians' Train Robbery".
He's the morris dancer whose clothes Frankie steals to effect a getaway - needless to say, Frankie then has to lead the other morris dancers in a performance. With hilarious consequences!

I know this isn't strictly MY claim to fame, but fuck it.
( friendlyfire, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 15:10, Reply)

Beadle and Dennis
I have two. Once, when i was on my very first plane (being a young chap) Jeremy Beadle sat next to me. He was a dick though, cos he made me move from the window seat and cos i laughed at his little spazzy hand. I seem to remember his wife and kids were alright though.
A few years later than that, I went on a skiing trip to Quebec with my school. When out on the piste we noticed that Les Dennis was walking along in the opposite direction. I am normally crap at throwing snowballs so I didnt think it would hit him right in the back of the head. I never found out what happened after that because i ran away.
Length, girth, etc
(mynameisnotgoodge, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 15:06, Reply)

Almost worth posting...
Indirect claim: The chap I sit next to at work, sups beer with a another chap called "Mike", Mike is a big guy who my friend thought was a farmer near Bridgend, Wales. They often share conversation about current affairs and "get upto much at the weekend?" type conversations. Mike doesn't answer much but nods in the right places. Anyway.. my friend realised last week that this is in fact Mike Ruddock, the Wales Rugby Union coach. "Now it all make sense, why he's not been their at weekends, recently!!"
(Coffee Monkey, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 15:04, Reply)

Ok, Here we go.
- I went to school with a kid who was distantly related to Gregory Peck.
- A distant relative of my own pioneered a version of a horse drawn combine harvester at the beginning of the last century.
- My step grandfather once drove David Lloyd George (WWI Brit PM) from North Wales to London as his own car had broken down. This was recaptured in a two second scene in 'The Life and Times of David Lloyd George' tv Miniseries.
- My father proved that oat fibre reduces blood cholesterol which had the world of the lab coat wearing boffins all of a tizz for a while.
- My sister had the (big aussie band at the time) Screaming Jets use her room at uni as a changing room as they prepared for her college end of year show as she was the only one with a mirror.
- I went to university with Ex Aussie Cricket Captain Ian Chappell's younger brother Greg Chappell's son Steve.

And

Drumroll

- I was also the first boy enrolled at my newly build primary school which got me into the Adelaide advertiser aged about 7 under the heading of 'going to the Hub of learning' which was a poor pun on the name of the shopping centre just over the back of the school.

Autographs are a fiver, no photos!

*Punches papparazzo*
(I am the infinite monkey!, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:49, Reply)

Papal...
My mum (who was disabled), got blessed by the Pope a few years ago... she pretended to be catholic as she thought it would be a memorable experience. Funny thing is, some official took a photo of her being blessed - the only person out of a group of about 50 Catholics who got blessed to have a picture recording it! Arf!
( Zaphod's Wombat - Never did quite get the hang of, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:47, Reply)

I pissed off Lemmy
Many moons ago when Motorhead were playing the Guilford Festival, I got a little carried away with it all and launched a beer can into the crowd, like you do. Unfortunately for me and for Lemmy, the can passed over its intended target and hit Lemmy square in the guitar. Throwing beer all over the warty metal head. He stopped the gig and berated me in front of a couple thousand people. He said that if I wanted a fight to come on stage and face him like a man. (not bloody likely) And not to hide in the crowd like some sort of pussy. Another band member then piped up saying that only applied to one person in the crowd (me) and not the rest of you who are cool. All of you are cool except that one guy (me). My mate was nearly beaten up by two massive Motorhead fans who thought he was the perpetrator. Ah well, my brush with celebrity.
( toadfish, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:43, Reply)

Cheesy forks
We were at a radio one roadshow in Derby many, many moons ago and a mate of mine shook Chesney Hawks' hand, but said he had delibrately squeezed it really hard and made Chesney squeal like a waif-esque pig.

YAY! another... I was in Planet Hollywood (Yawn) on the same night that Chris *ginger fuckwit* Evans was having his birthday party so there was lots'o'celeb, anyway I was sat at the bar next to 'Blake' from Home and Away and was quitely stealing his fags, when he noticed I quickly stood up, gave him a big molest and shouted 'Look everyone it's that Blake from Home and Away' and ran out.

Crackers.
(cherry B, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:38, Reply)

Tenuous
I went to school with a guy whose Dad used to live next door to Mick out of Dave Dee, Dozey, Beaky, Mick and Titch.

Also, my dad went to the same school as Su Pollard, but not at the same time.

Also, I've seen Paul "him what used to be in Manfred Mann and what sang 'Do Wah Diddy'" Jones' cock. True.
(parm, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:26, Reply)

Near Miss for fame, not for my testicles
I'd almost managed to block this one out but, my school (all of it as it was a poxy little village primary) was invited to be part of the audience on the Really Wild Show, the day before came and our games teacher managed to smack me in the bollocks with a cricket ball when he was demonstrating a fast ball. Bastard... anyway, I didn't end up on the show as I was in Hospital with a testicle the size of a coconut. I imagine nowadays I could sue for that, but back then they were more innocent times, times where a games teacher could get away with hospitalising a pupil without anyone asking any questions... wankers...
(Akhaal, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:21, Reply)

Another one...
Someone else's post reminded me... Last summer, my little bro was living in Boston and he went to see Ted Leo and the Pharmacists in a smallish venue. Somehow, he got Ted Leo to sign a birthday card for me. (Bro drove back to Jersey and surprised me with it a couple days later.) So, I've got a birthday card signed by Ted Leo, and a brother who rocks.
(emgee, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:19, Reply)

Ryan Giggs
I once went out drinking with Ryan Giggs's cousin.
They apparently share the same nickname - Giggsey
(pdjpdj, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:09, Reply)

Ahem.
I'm in the credits for Mortal Kombat III.




Second from last, but I'm in them, damn you!
(antonye, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:06, Reply)

although I have just been reminded of another gladiators related one
Laughing at how clever we were myself and a few friends went to a "meet the gladiators" type thing when we were at Uni.

Shadow just stood there glowering at little kids, Hawk(? it was a while ago) picked me up by my head because he claimed I was Bob Geldof in disguise, and the small one who left after the first series was just weird.

Lightning asked me if my hair was natural. Several seconds later she realised that people don't have naturally purple hair and was suitably embarrased. For some reason we both found this really funny and chatted for 5 minutes. For the next three years not a saturday night went past in which someone said, "See that Lightning. She fancies Rob she does". I found this strangely pleasing!
(Throbbe, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:04, Reply)

money lending
for absolute tenuousness, you can't beat this (not really fame, but still a good story)

My dad works in the IT industry in the UK, and knows a bloke who works for Microsoft in this country. Anyway, big boss of Microsoft (that's Bill Gates to you and me) comes over for meetings and what-not with various big wigs, and gets a cab straight to their place from Heathrow. On getting out of said cab he realises he's got no dosh, and so my dad's mate lends him a tenner.

Don't know if he got it back, but quite nice to say you've lent the richest man in the world a tenner.....

Oh, and I've seen meself on telly quite a few times, usually at football matches. Liverpool v Ipswich Town FA Cup 5th round replay at Anfield springs to mind (early nineties), when i went with my brother and dad, who are both Ipswich fans (I being the sole member of the family with some sense). We were sat on the front row of the Anny Road end, just to the left of the goal. Anyway, Liverpool score in front of 7'000 odd Ipswich fans, and a small child is the only person to be seen leaping off his seat and celebrating. I then realised there were 7'000 angry farmers behind me, and sat down quite quickly...
(blurred, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:03, Reply)

a bit shit but
i lied to murry(sp?) walker to get his autograph

and i saw the queen drive past me once
( 95778132, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 14:03, Reply)

My mum ...
... once sold Lemmy a cream cake.

Frankly, I am destined to live in the shadow of her greatness forever.
(Throbbe, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:55, Reply)

Barnes again
Useless_rocker reminded me about John Barnes. For my sins, I worked in Dixons for a while. Barnes would occasionally call at 5.25 and announce he was coming in and to hold the store open just for him. He'd arrive with his wife (hot pants and trainers with bows on) and kids. I'd have to keep the kids entertained while some senior salesperson sold him useless crap.
(Redbull_(UK) pfffft, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:54, Reply)

Not so much a claim to fame but...
Whilst working at Club La Santa in Lanzerote in 1995 there were lots of international athletes who used the place as a training camp, for instance John Regis, Tony Jarrett, Frank Bruno (prior to getting another beating). The list could go on...

Can't really put this coherently so make of this what you will...
Whilst at Club La Sant, me (winsurfing instructor), Diane Youdale (Jet from Gladiators), lying on a beach, I had Jet on one arm, her rather fit mate on the other, photographed, me looking like the cat who had all of teh cream.

All smug forever (and exceptional forearms). No apologies for length or girth.
(Tibbins, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:53, Reply)

A family of stalkers.
I've been on Blue Peter twice, once waving in a crowd at an airshow and once at a fun-run. Nothing more than that I'm afraid.
However, other family claims to fame are that my Dad worked in the film industry as a technician and had snacks with the likes of Barbara "not much to look at to be honest" Windsor, Sean "he really does speak like that" Connery and Diana "oh, she was lovely and very funny" Dors. He also chauffered the Fairy Liquid Kid around for a while, and said she was a horrible child who refused to put her seat-belt on.
My mother once served Harold Wilson at the bank where she worked. She forgets what he wanted done, probably a loan!
( CaroWallis, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:52, Reply)

Ryan Giggs from Man Utd
About 10 years ago I went for a meal at Worsley Old Hall in Manchester. Anyway I need a pee and go to the gents and stop there at the urinal is Ryan Giggs from Manchester United. The poor guy wasbeing harassed by guys for autographs for there girlfriends. And throughout this Ryan managed to pee.
He's cut and average length - well I had to look didn't I. Didn't I ??

And I lived on the same posh estate in central Manchester as Katy Harris.
So I've pissed with Ryan Giggs :)
(colinbatesuk, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:48, Reply)

Utter crapness
Susie Dent, from Dictionary corner on Countdown used to be my babysitter, as my partly senile father tells me EVERY time the programme is on.
(Dizzy Bob loves nuts, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:36, Reply)

Cavorting with the stars
Chris Martin, lead singer and songwriter of Coldplay fame, has been in my house. He came to my brother's birthday party.

I don't like to let the fact that they were both 6 (and me 1) undermine the story.
(Rocksteady is intrigued, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:35, Reply)

I once put 5 goals past Steve McManaman
He was in goal so that we wouldn't break his legs and put him out of the European Catholic Schoolboys Football Championships or something.

He then went on to glory at Real Madrid, whilst I toss it off on teh Interspaz for a living. Still, it beats playing for Man City.
(nevin Sharpness is a bourgeois concept, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:34, Reply)

Playboy Model
I went on expedition to Malaysia to do some charity work building a school in the jungle (about 6 weeks before the tsumani hit). We had an apparently famous (I'd never heard of her) playboy model and page 3 girl (she's always in the Daily Sport with her tits out)who'd signed up as well. She did fuck all while we were there except wind people up complaining about fucking everything whilst doing nothing. I've never met a more pointless, inane, whiney, whingey, abusive, lazy person in my entire life...

On the plus side though I did get to feel her tits and see her mimsy. So it wasn't all bad.


ps. Who the fuck takes high heels into the jungle?! I ask ya...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:30, Reply)

A few years ago
whilst out on the lash in Derby, we walked past Michael Palin.
I got a good whiff of his aftershave, and quite frankly it was a bit shit.
( Scary Mary The D'oh Fairy, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:29, Reply)

Siouxsie and the Banshees
When Siouxsie and the Banshees split in 1979, Kenny morris and John Mckay stormed out of a record signing and asked some loitering youths where they could get a taxi. I told them.
(Chillumm, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:27, Reply)

rich twunts
i was in a local national chain electronic store when i spotted an ginormous flat screen tv. i mentioned to a mate that only rich fat bastards who have no sense of money would buy that. i turned around and there was the legend john barnes ordering one. he looked slightly upset, but im sure his money comforted him later - and he never bought one for me (the impoverished student that i am)
( useless_rocker twitter.com/phillipteague, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:25, Reply)

I shared my childhood home
with the drummer from Runrig.
( Newington, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 13:19, Reply)