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This is a question Claims to Fame

Rob writes, "My photoshop claim to fame: the way the crop tool greys out the rest of the image? That was my idea. I sent it to the Abobe features request thing back in ooh probably about 1998. (After spending a frustrating day cropping images for a dull
website, and wishing the tool worked better.)"

What crappy claims to fame can you make?

(, Thu 24 Feb 2005, 12:49)
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This question is now closed.

Oooerrr!
I've met Sue King (ex Westward TV presenter) and Don Estelle (vertically challenged actor from "It ain't 'alf hot Mum") in the late 70's so back then they where famous!

Met loads of vacuous Z-list types whilst working at a nightclub. Most of 'em where as wanky and self obsessed as you'd expect a z-list celeb to be.

VJ'd with the likes of Lab-4, Eat Static and Mr Keith Flint out of Prodigy. All really nice blokes!
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 14:07, Reply)
Famous faces?
Anyone remember that bloke off Eastenders about a year ago that played Dirty Dan? Craig Fairbrass? Well, when I was a till monkey in a famous American wholesale supermarket (in the UK) I had the (?) privilege of serving him at the till. Oh, and I saw Ray Parlour once in there too. His wife was lovely - very chirpy - probably planning the divorce proceedings already...
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 14:01, Reply)
art and poker
i once had the dubious pleasure of working as a wage slave in the oxford st. branch of paperchase. this, on the whole, sucks, and was only enlivened by the incident when dylan moran (of black books semi-fame) came in looking for an art set. sadly the majority of paperchase stock is pretty crappy, so he went away empty-handed, but not before i noted (to myself, natch) that he is quite as vague as his tv/stand-up persona would suggest.

not good enough? oh, ok, you forced it out of me. i won forty quid off of matt bellamy from muse a couple of weeks back. and no, this wasn't on some online casino site. i've known them for well over a decade, and he had a game at his swanky mayfair flat
*names drop with a dull thud*
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:50, Reply)
Some guy from ILM
(thats Industrial, light and magic) came to give a speech in my home town on the star wars special editions and give a sneak peak at Ep. I. (so this was a few years ago)
At the end of the lecture the guy asks if anybody has any questions. My mate stands up and asks "Why, in Ep. IV special edition, does Jabba the Hutt look so fucking shite?"

Needless to say this provided all of us with a good laugh for ages but if you go and check out the holy trilogy DVD and compare it to the special edition on VHS you'll see that he got the fuckers to fix it.

Fucking Legend.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:47, Reply)
Fame
Met Jimmy Saville and Lenny Henry at store opening event things.

Walked past Chris Eubank in The Lanes in Brighton, he was handing out signed photos of himself. Coughed in such a way that it sounded like I was shouting "twat" (which I was)at him. I was drunk at the time. My mates were rather eager to leave the vacinity, but as I'm bigger than Eubank I wasn't really bothered.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:28, Reply)
How could I forget
I met some of the Aussie rugby team in Paris. Bill Young said he worshipped my curly hair (his own words) and seemed to want to kiss it. Bumgay.
I caught a bit of celery that was thrown at a super furries gig and have frozen it and kept it.... I know!
My ex girlfriend's ex boyfriend's exgirlfriend's dad played bass for Chris Rea.
On separate occasions I have played pool with Chris Tarrant's son and met his dog wandering alone in the street.
Chris Tarrant's son then asked out my gf but was harshly rejected. ha!
I saw Zoe Ball once and she was carrying a bag with a big picture of her face on it. She looked better than I expected, if slightly podgier.
My local pub in Bristol was regularly frequented by members of casualty and massive attack.
I think the ginger man-nurse from casualty was involved in a rather embarassing scene when my mate/twat told a girl she had nice tits and that he was going to "go home now and wank over them".
Also, Michaels Aspel's son goes to my uni. I was told this at a party and replied "really, doesn't his dad have loads of illicit affairs and love children?" before being kicked in the shin and told that he was behind me. I turned round and lo! he was just like a mini Aspel but with a deep and mysterious sadness in his eyes.
Apologies for height.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:23, Reply)
Add-on post!
Oh, yeah, and also my aunt wrote a book about Lewis Caroll.

Also I appeared in the local paper on account of my having leukaemia and later having a bone marrow transplant to cure said leukaemia. God damn it, it was NOT a few days after the new marrow engrafted that I was released, it was over a month! Most of the worst side-effects were after engraftment and I'm still on the antibiotics because I got a recurrant infection near the end.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:20, Reply)
My sister...
used to work in the local Spar with a friend from school of professional kid's TV twunt Richard "Dick and Dom" McCourt. He went to the same school as me but ages before so it doesn't count.

Also my sister was on the Adam and Joe show laughing at Adam molesting her friend disguised as a mime.

Er... I met Jack White once. and nearly met Michael Palin but couldn't be arsed.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:20, Reply)
Norweigan disco - to - Finish, then Swedish Tenuosity.
The Infamous "Disco Tansit" Dance instructor (Definitley a Fin) has a Swedish Name!!! well I never!!

As it happens... I SIT next to an Åke Blomqvist, so we can all be happy knowing that his name-sake sits here in Sweden... "my" Åke can't dance, but he can really skate...

erm.

I'll get me coat.

EDIT: I just saw this fantastiche sign...
www.b3ta.com/board/4310554
I'll just go put me coat back.
.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:15, Reply)
Laaame
1) Further to Jokaah's message, I shared a room at college with a bloke whose grandfather invented custard creams. Either it's all a big urban myth, or Jokaah and I are connected in a bizzarre 6-degrees of separation kinda fashion....

2) I used to have a Saturday job in the record department of our local John Menzies (glam or what?), and I worked with a lass whose brother was the lead singer* with Extreme Noise Terror.

3) My wife's cousin's girlfriend's uncle did the autopsy on Bruce Lee.


Wooooooo; first post!

* or whatever
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 13:12, Reply)
More tenuous links to celebrity
I've met and actually spoken briefly to Angeline Ball and Bronagh Gallagher (both from the Committments)

Self and friends were sat at the next table to Norah Jones and friends in a Moroccan restaurant.

Passed Samantha Mumba in the street.

..and in my younger, metaler days - I was at a gig of a band called Dignam and Goff (singer was Christy Dignam from that 'famous' Irish band Aslan). Managed to completely freak out poor old Christy by standing front & centre around 3ft from the stage with arms folded and an unimpressed expression for the entire gig. He got very unsettled by the whole experience.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 12:54, Reply)
Thrilling
My mate shagged the niece of the bloke who wrote 'Thriller'. In Grimsby.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 12:47, Reply)
Biscuit
My cousin's husband's friend's grandfather invented the custard cream.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 12:34, Reply)
The hamiltons
Neil Hamilton once wanted to wank all over me once and I helped Richard Madeley steal some Gin from tescos.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 12:17, Reply)
Claim to Fame
I'm gonna live forever
I'm gonna learn how to fly......HIGH!
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 12:14, Reply)
Custard fight
A couple of weeks ago I was taxied to BBC Television Centre at 7:30am, dressed up in a cowboy outfit and took part in Dick and Dom's Creamy-muck-muck Wild West food fight. Live on BBC1. Very proud.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 12:05, Reply)
Actually this is unverified...
...but my great-great-grandmother was a maid in the service of Captain Webb (first bloke to swim the channel). She left his service pregnant and unmarried, so I may be a descendant of his. Then again, it could have been the butler...
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 11:58, Reply)
Lames to fame
I once went skiing with Russ Abbott's son
I met Jim Bowen in Walsall town centre when we were both pissed up
I won a competition to be first on stage at the V99 music festival in Weston Park
I was a background zombie in Shaun of the Dead
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 11:53, Reply)
Rahzel
This made me so happy.
My friend got Rahzel to leave me an answer phone message.
Yes Rahzel making very strange noises on my phone, Amazing.

For the next three weeks anyone who I met would have the message played at them (usually many, many times untill they ran away and avoided me for a while).
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 10:59, Reply)
I have thought up...
Numerous things for the Tony Hawk series, that turned up about 2 years after thinking it. They're clearly probing my mind.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 10:20, Reply)
Rubbing shoulders with the A List ....
- My sister's best friend at theatre school was Kate Winslet (me Dad used to drive them both to "shows" they were in)

- I nearly ran over a very pregnant Patsy Palmer in Sloan Square (I swear I tried my hardest to hit her)

- My brother fired Rowan Atkinson's father-in-law

- I saw Dr Heinz Woolf from The Great Egg Race when I was about 10 but was too scared to ask for his autograph

- Another of my sisters friends (note I have no friends!) played the angel who talks to Jesus after he shags in The Last Temptation of Christ (but she couldnt go to the premiere because she wasnt 18)

- My cousins are in Zoot Women ("soon to make it big" retro 80's style band)

- My missus worked at a swanky London hotel and once showed The Corrs around one of the suites (the lead singer was a bitch and took every opportunity to check herself in the mirrors)

- My Dad knocked Barry Sheen off his motorbike in Silverstone car park (nothing was broken but by then he was mostly metal anyways)
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 10:17, Reply)
loopylorenzo reminded me
Not me but my aunt is very good friends with jeremy beadle and my cousin used to be his nanny (for his children, not him). He even phones my aunt regulary, she went to his mothers funeral and has some of his mother furniture in her house. She was in hello magazine.

The chuckle brothers come from my home town and I always see them looking in cheap shops, tight gits. Oh and i saw Barry the other week drawing money out.

I went to Los Angeles while they were filiming Charlies Angels outside the Kodak theatre, i think my elbow my be in one shot and saw lucy lui and drew barrymore talking to some random crew memeber.

And! Tis my first post!
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 10:07, Reply)
Not mine, but a friend's.
A friend of mine was working as a labourer at Grundy Studios. He stood next to Harold Bishop from Neighbours at the urinals.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 10:05, Reply)
Oh yeah, and....
I got drunk with the Hamiltons (politically disgraced media whores, for those who don't live in this country). Mrs Hamilton was so drunk she apologised to traffic bollards after walking into them.

Apparently, she has a problem.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 10:02, Reply)
Timmy Mallet!
When I was 8 years old, I met him in Halifax and got hit on the head with Mallet's Mallet.
Also, I met all of the Babylon 5 cast (at convention in Blackpool, does that count? photos here) and Claudia Christian was very hot
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 9:38, Reply)
I know two memebers of the boyband
southern edge

(does it count that I am the third?)
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 9:06, Reply)
i can see this qotw setting new standards in mediocrity
The luscious son of harry hamlin (LA Law) and Ursula Andress (Bond Bikini Beauty)was in my class in Rome - she turned up for PTA meetings and all the dads got stiffies

Tina Turner used to get her groceries from the 'gourmet paradise' I worked in in Zürich

oh and the bassist from the 69 Eyes (finnish goth band) invited me backstage after their gig last week and flat out asked me if I wanted to give him a bj. Apparently they get sick of all these undernourished gothic girlies and long for 'real women'. Somehow it's even more stisfying knowing that i turned him down... heehee
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 9:03, Reply)
Norwegian Disco!
I was helping a friend move when an elderly gentleman held a door open for me. Imagine my surprise when it was Åke Blomqvist, the dance instructor who was mistaken for Norwegian in newsletter 166. (He actually is Finnish, as was later pointed out.) Brilliant man.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 8:33, Reply)
David Copperfield`s foot
Reading Viz in a newsagents at LA airport when I noticed Claudia Schiffer standing next to me (like you do). As I turned around to give her a suave smile in the vague hope she`d ask me back to her hotel, I felt something soft and squishy under my foot. Not wanting to look uncool I just ignored it thinking it was a piece of rubbish or worse..

After a couple of minutes of me pretending not to care that I was standing next to a supermodel with my foot potentially in something quite nasty, I finally looked down and saw I was standing on David Copperfield`s shoe.

Don`t know what she saw in him..
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 7:28, Reply)
out of control!!!
meet two of the guys from hoobastank after a concert. complete with ortograph and pictures. these folks are way short.
(, Tue 1 Mar 2005, 7:19, Reply)

This question is now closed.

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