After reading today's posts
I'm disappointed that there are some seemingly lovely guys on here and therefore out in the real world that really do give a shit about womenfolk, but I never seems to meet them.

So to all the guys who have had their hearts broken recently and been brave enough to talk about it honestly, have a hug.

*Not an EMO thread, just an observation*
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:46, 97 replies)

Maybe you're looking in the wrong place.
B3ta singles, anyone? C'mon, we can do this! Sounds like there's a lot of matchmaking to be done in here.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:53, closed)

I give b3ta dating
Two thumbs up.
*grins*
( Cawl, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:54, closed)

two
thumbs up where?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:55, closed)

That's disgusting
People like you should drag your minds out of the gutter long enough to feel ashamed.
( Cawl, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:56, closed)

you love it
you dirty slag
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:58, closed)

Not really
I'm honestly shocked.
( Cawl, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:58, closed)

b3tasingles.co.uk?
Meh, can't be worse than Faceparty.

/shudders
(Laxly, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:04, closed)

Bagsy I get Gilgamesh.
*heaves*
( girlinthehole, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:05, closed)

Maybe I have been looking in the wrong place
Gumtree personals haven't exactly lent themselves to males of the sane and nice variety
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:06, closed)

i don't believe
i've shocked kaol

*starts mexican wave*
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:06, closed)

*laughs*
*points*

I'd say I'm pretty much un-shockable by anything other than electricity.
( Cawl, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:09, closed)

Yup, gumtree
To be fair I've made a lot of friends on there, but not met anyone of real merit I'd consider having more than a casual fling with.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:13, closed)

gumtree is a farce
that said, paid dating sites arent much better
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:15, closed)

Thing is
I'm sure you'd meet a better class of guy on a paid site than you would on a freebie site. But I hate the idea of paying to meet someone. Feels too much like pimping.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:16, closed)

Gumtree?
As in, "up a"?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:17, closed)

k2k6
as in .com
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:23, closed)

Hmm
that was an awfully solemn response Becky. I wasn't taking the piss, just being a tad facetious.

Sorry if it came across otherwise.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:28, closed)

Sorry k2k6
not meant to be at all. Just trying and failing to write on several forums at once and you got the short answer this time.

Gumtree has several areas for dating, long term, dating and just fucking. Just a shame that a lot of guys on there can't be honest and say they're just looking for sex when they say they're looking for the woman of her dreams to share life with.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:33, closed)

Allo
Yeah there does seem to be a lot of broken hearted males on here.

On the bright side tonight I'm sober. Woo.

I dispute Kaol's Lordship of 12 million angry bees.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:34, closed)

If I was looking...
I reckon I'd be looking for a B3tan!

*high fives all the cool single people*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:35, closed)

Seriously, it should be done.
Only I would not correlate the b3ta usernames with the dating site usernames- that way people won't be targeted from here, but can make a fresh start. And if it doesn't work out or something, your identity on here will still be safe.

Someone ask Rob if this can be done!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:35, closed)

in no way dissing online websites
but why do you need to use them, you're slim, pretty, sparky and bright!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:35, closed)

Bees
Yes. Remember the bees are disappearing.

Doctor Who seems terribly concerned by this. Kaol possibly has something to do with this, as seeing as he's off to watch films now we can talk about him!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:36, closed)

..
"in no way dissing online websites
but why do you need to use them, you're slim, pretty, sparky and bright!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe just doesn't get it sometimes, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:35"

Awww thanks :D
.
...oh, you weren't talking about me :'(
(Laxly, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:39, closed)

^Actually, yes...
What 'Swipe said. :)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:40, closed)

Films
about bees?

I've just watched Phoenix Nights with two serbians so my evening has been odd enough already...
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:40, closed)

@Becky
The reason most guys won't be that honest is because then they'll get bombed with pr0n spammers and the like, and will never get an honest response out of a real female. Women don't respond to such ads- I once tried it as an experiment. You have to put words like "relationship" and "love" in there or they won't respond.

It's a wretched little game, innit?
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:42, closed)

@laxly
there's no picture of you in your profile!

therefore i couldn't possibly comment. being a lawyer and afraid of litigation and all that.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:42, closed)

I'm up for this
maybe set up a private facebook group??? where you can only gain access once you supply your b3ta name??
(drain_bamaged, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:44, closed)

I use them because
I'm usually shy before I get to know people - the bash was an exception as I felt like I already knew you lot.

I don't really go to places where you 'meet people'. I don't do clubbing, don't drink that much and all of the blind dates I've been set up on have been friends of friends that are hopelessly unsuitable.

Online dating works for me as you get a bit of a feel for someone, you know if they're interested or not instead of the shy hopping round that occurs in real life if you're as bad at reading the signs as I am.

Until 3 months ago I had NO spare time as I was always working. Then I had 21/2 months out of work and couldn't afford to go out and my self esteem took a bit of a hit and I put on some weight. So catch 22 really.

At the moment I've sworn off net dating thanks to the arrogant fuckwit I met last Friday, but guys I've met in the past have started to crawl out of the woodwork and email me after months of no contact, so not sure how strong my resolve is.

*would be open to b3ta dating, but with a different username. Not sure how well it would work though as I already have a picture of me in my profile, so it'd be a bit obvious*

God that was emo, sorry.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:45, closed)

Wotcha
not too bad, life goes on. And on and on.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:46, closed)

Hey you!
Well, the mrs is in t'other room, so...

*snog*

Anyone else? Form an orderly queue! :)

*whores*

(Unrelated note - any new takers for Friday?)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:46, closed)

How do I...
upload a picture? Didn't see an option for it.
(Laxly, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:47, closed)

i'd say
most people find partners when they're not really looking. but then if you aren't looking, how do you meet anyone?

makes my head hurt!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:47, closed)

@'swipe
I dunno.

I tend to just blunder into things.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:48, closed)

an IT genius b3tan
taught me how to do it - upload a picture to photobucket, which will then automatically give you an http code. copy and paste that code into the box in your profile and robert's your father's brother. or something.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:49, closed)

Pictures
You need to have it somewhere on the interwebs, such as b3tards.com, and then you need to put an image link to it in your profile.

*is useful*

and too slow :(
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:49, closed)

B3TA dating
Yes, I'd definitely agree to B3TA dating, our ginger fuhrer should positively leap upon this bandwagon. I'd do it...all my friends are married with kids so I never meet anyone new other than their latest offspring...and no crude jokes, please!
(SpongyMonkey is an honorary East Anglian on, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:49, closed)

It's probably because we're quite hard to meet.
Kind, thoughtful guys are often less assertive and charming than guys who don't care so much. Sweeping generalisation, I know, but sadly there's truth in it. We don't want to be perceived the way assertive men are often presented in culture - as womanising, shallow, and arrogant. Unfortunately the nervous stammering, clumsy flirting, and ill-conceived jokes of the "lovely" man just aren't that attractive to most women. Neither is politeness if it isn't laced with a little bit of good-natured sauce, and because we're taught from a young age to be polite to women, we find it hard to step outside of that when we're trying to get someone to like us. Men who don't care have no problem with this, of course, so are much better at overcoming that mental hurdle.

Women, for their part, tend to be turned off by lack of confidence, but often don't realise that quiet men who are nervous about approaching them, or just choose to be polite, can be confident too. Confidence with men is often a serene, inner thing that doesn't manifest in assertive behaviour. Even if a guy is nervous when he approaches you or asks you out, that doesn't mean he's a virgin or scared of women - it just means he actually cares about your response. And just responding politely works wonders on most men to fix their nervousness and put them at ease after that initial opening, putting you in a position to get an informed conclusion about what they're really like. It doesn't automatically mean you're interested, it just means you're nice. If you find lack of confidence unattractive, try not to assume that it's the same thing as nerves or just "being a quiet person", because you might be overlooking some wonderful guys.

If more nice men were capable of being more assertive, and not feeling like wankers when we try, or if women were better at realising that masculinity and confidence aren't necessarily externalised attributes, we'd all have an easier time. And the arseholes wouldn't get as much sex, which is a bonus.

Each of our genders just needs to better understand how the other thinks, and not feel bad just for having that kind of mindset. Or think that the other gender is wrong for what they find attractive, when really the problems lie more in how they go about finding it.

That's my observation, anyway. Make of it what you will.

And thanks for your post, beckyjsbx - it's uplifting to see that you think masculinity and heartbreak aren't mutually exclusive.

Christ, I keep pontificating. I should stop. I'm really not trying to whine, just share my opinions, but people seem to think I come across that way, so sorry if the above sounds plaintive.

I hope nobody thinks I was stereotyping either. That's why I was careful to use words like "often" rather than "always".

P.S. I, for one, think a b3ta singles column is a really good idea, purely because I know a few couples actually have got together through b3ta. May as well see if there are any other potential couples out there too, eh? :)
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:52, closed)

Evening lovely people!
Just back in after a really nice curry with workmates.
Hope you are all fabulous!

*grins*
*sways*

*edit*
@Ghost of Stephen Foster

I really like the way you write fella!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:53, closed)

Who's the ginger fuhrer?
If you mean me, forgeddaboudit. I'm naturally blonde, but choose to be a red head.

Edit: Snogs everyone for good measure
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:53, closed)

Ghost
thing is, there's confidence and there's arrogance and there's a fine line between the two. I hate arrogant people - quit my very very well paid job at the BBC because of them and I'd never go back. But everyone should have confidence in themselves.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:56, closed)

In seriousness...
I'm pretty sure that I'm a nice guy - a good mix of confidence and shyness. I think I've got a decent sense of humour, and I (think) my appearance doesn't make people want to vomit.

But, after the end of university and the collapse of my relationship, I spent the next three years single. OK, there was one girl who took my mind and flung it in to outer space, but she also very nearly convinced myself that I was always going to be single as being a nice guy always seemed to backfire on me.

So it's nice to know there's other guys like me out there - but also encouraging that I met a girl on the internet (and proud, thank you!), spent two years getting to know her, and then slowly and surely fell in love with her. We get married next year.

Internet dating rules. I did, however, meet a few fruit loops along the way. And developed a crippling cocaine addiction, but the less said about that the better! :)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:57, closed)

@Becky
The Ginger Fuhrer would be this guy.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:57, closed)

@DiT
Ah... sounds similar to the situation I've just found meself in... mind currently somewhere around Jupiter... trying to figure out whether stopping being a nice guy and starting being a bastard will help.

Meh.

Emotions. Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 22:59, closed)

Yay!!! \o/
Done it, now lets start the dating!!! lol
(Laxly, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:00, closed)

Don't do it Zap!
Don't turn into an awful person!!!

I often feel that there are very few other nice people out there.

*counts self as nice person*
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:02, closed)

@Zap
Well, I'd say stick with being who you are. No point in lying to yourself or anyone else, it'll only end up in tears.

On the harsh side, if she doesn't see you and accept you for who you are, then she's not worth the trauma.

That said, I think we all know how easy it is to say that when you're outside of the situation.

Hope it works out old boy!

EDIT: 'Course you are, PoD!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:02, closed)

Precisely.
And a lot of men are worried about appearing arrogant, or even feeling arrogant, because of the stereotype of the smarmy prick with the medallion and the leopardskin thong, so we overcompensate and don't assert ourselves despite having the confidence to do so. And a lot of women, conversely, assume it's lack of confidence.

It's a bizarre collision of conflicting psychology. Like a guy with a ball and a guy with a hoop who are standing in adjacent rooms with the door closed. They've got the equipment to play the game, but one of them's going to have to try looking in the next room.
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:04, closed)

@DiT & PoD
Yeah I suppose so.

I tried being a bastard once... which for me meant not opening the door for my then girlfriend.

Meh. Who knows, she emailed me today. She also has a load of my CDs and some books of mine.

Worryingly her mother dropped round for tea the other day and asked me to help waiter at some party she's having. Hmm.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:05, closed)

@Zap
I agree with DIT.

I'm not prepared to compromise what it essentially me just on the off-chance of a quick fumble.
Fair enough, I'm not inundated with offers, but I have so many friends who recognise me for the fun, loving, supportive and loyal person I try to be.
Loves and losses come and go; friends are where my heart is.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:05, closed)

Laxly
if we can't see your face it doesnt count ,)

Edit: Ghost, Do men REALLY think like that? I thought that sterotype had been pastiched enough that it had died long ago.

Edit 2: DiT, yay for you. My brother met his wife online and they're happily living in the states now with two gorgeous kids and are very much in love

Edit 3: BK, nicely put. Good set of values. I've learned the hard way to always put friends first as they are the ones who will always be there for you.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:06, closed)

Exactly, Boss.
Right-o, my favourite internet type peeps, I'm off to bed.

A long, long time ago, in a land far, far away....


Zzzzzz *dreams*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:07, closed)

I had a photo up
Of sorts, anyway, at one point.

It was removed due to Kaol-related worries.

I sometimes just go in a rubbish mood and become kind of an ass. Some people bring it out more than other too.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:08, closed)

Worryingly
possibly the best photo of myself that I have is of me in a pink wig, makeup, and a black and pink dress... not so sure I would want to put that one up.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:15, closed)

Seems like the other side of my problem
(not quite the opposite, but the same)

Loads of lovely ladies who don't think my knowledge of HTML & CSS make me a geek to be classed with "trainspotting anorak types". Where can they be found? The Internet, especially places like B3ta.

In the real world. Never met any of them. My last girlfriend (still can't manage to call her "the ex") didn't even own a computer...

If you're female, single, and know what a nested DIV is please get in touch (that sounds like a cheezy line from blind date but say HI anyway).

[EDIT] added pic to profile just in case ;o)
( Amos E Wolfe makes vinyl signs and things like that, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:16, closed)

@beckyjsbx:
Yup. Not all of us, but a lot of us. It's more of a feeling than a thought, an instinct that conflicts with rationality. It's easy to feel slimy if you think women are laughing at you, or if (as sadly happens more than you might think) they really are laughing at you just for trying to talk to them, which can sometimes make you think you're the one who's wrong and that they're laughing for a reason.

Being knocked back in any bad way can colour your perceptions of how you come across. I ws talking to a friendly, genuinely likeable friend of mine the other week, and he told me he experiences the same thing I often do: women he approaches in clubs often just ignore him and walk away when he says "hi". This makes you feel like a weirdo. Just saying "hi" back and deliberately keeping the conversation brief can achieve the same result without making anybody feel bad. "Sorry, Im spoken for" or "just not my type" are obviously fine and don't make him feel like it's his fault.

Not that this notion is entirely caused by women's responses; just almost as an aside I wanted to mention how rudely men sometimes get treated. I'm probably just unlucky in that I happen to have tried talking to a lot of women who aren't as pleasant as they might have seemed. It does reinforce the idea that men who pursue women are perverts though.

The fact that the stereotype has been lampooned so often only contributes - the pursuing alpha male is parodied as a pervert who thinks he's studly when really he's just a twat who nobody likes.
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:26, closed)

@ Becky
Ok, uploaded one. Happy now? lol
(Laxly, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:27, closed)

b3tan dating is the way to go
Not only do you get to check out their views on just about everything by reading their qotw answers, you also find out their nasty little secrets that way.

It also means you never run out of things to talk about.

You also get to cruise bookshops and petshops together so you can check out the kittens.

Dating a b3tan means never having to explain Sickipedia.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:33, closed)

'night ancrenne
I'm away too. Have fun all.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:38, closed)

@ Ghost of ....
What you're saying about women being rude to men who approach them is sadly very true.

Many times I've been out clubbing or just in a pub with 'attractive' females - in fact one woman in particular is a model - utterly stunning to look at but also a total bitch who looked down on me (partly because I only clock in at 5'7" and she's way over 6') simply because I'm polite to men....

EDIT - I forgot to finish that bit...
Anyway, the model in particular but others too will openly laugh at a man who they consider beneath them - too old, too fat, too unattractive, too shy....anything in fact that doesn't conform to their Alpha male stereotype.

Yes, it's just like being back at school with the cool kids.

Geeks of the world, rise up and cunt the cool kids in the fuck.

I was always told by my dad that if a bloke makes the effort to walk across a pub or club to come and ask you to dance then you should dance with him. If he then asks to buy you a drink and you don't like the look of him you say, Thanks but no thanks. That way he hasn't lost face by being turned down flat and you haven't hooked up with someone you don't like the look of...

So if someone talks to me *anywhere* I always talk back - that's just good manners and they cost nothing.

*Polishes halo*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:39, closed)

Agrees with chickenlady
It takes a lot of guts to speak to someone in that kind of situation for the first time, so if they're not my type I'm always polite about it. If they then turn out to be a cunt then I'm less polite in my rebuttal (hee hee, managed to sneak butt into a nicely worded sentance there!)

Sometimes you've got to be the one to suck it up and go speak to the object of your affections and be rejected in order to find the one you really want.

Edit: Thats better laxly ,)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:46, closed)

Women!
Never bloody satisfied! lol ;)
(Laxly, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:48, closed)

@Chickenlady
Thats nice, but most women aren't like that. They'll just flat out ignore you if you don't conform to some knuckle dragging stereotype.

Although, in a spirit of honesty, I will admit that I usually used to be blind drunk when approaching women in clubs. Its a bad trade off: need to be drunk to have the confidence to approach them, but also need to be sober enough to talk.

I failed, a lot. Even when sober. Its weird... female friends of mine complain about the utter bastards they go out with, but a nice guy shows interest and they run a mile... straight into the arms of another bastard.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:48, closed)

Good for you, chickenlady.
I realise how you need to be careful about getting with a man who turns out to be evil or something, but I think a lot of women - especially women who get a lot of attention - could be gentler about it.

Of course, the women who get a lot more attention would logically get more attention from arseholes as well as ordinary guys, so I can see how they might become over-defensive. But still.

Anyway, have an uplifting and strangely thematic video: www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-p2sbt_C4w

I was just reminded of it by some of the posts today. It's the perfect "men with feelings and weaknesses are still men, you know" song. A rarely-considered theme. It's also fucking beautiful. :)
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:50, closed)

B3ta dating sounds like a good idea.
Of course, there's the whole 'internet dating is full of weirdos' thing, multiplied...
( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:50, closed)

@Zapiola:
That's essentially the uncharitable version of my post. :)
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:51, closed)

When I go out with my female friends
I really like chatting to different people - it makes my evening to speak to guys like the Belgian golf pro (I thought he was winding me up until I saw his photo in the local paper a couple of weeks ago in an article about getting lessons at the local golf club), or the chap who works at the local pharmaceutical city (the one that makes viagra). All interesting chaps...none of them wanted to buy me a drink, none of them offered me their phone number but we had a lovely chat about not very much.

I think that was the same evening I ended up having an arm wrestle on the top of a bin in the high street. I let him win.

*EDIT* I didn't get the phone numbers or the drinks because if I'm not interested in a man I won't flirt outrageously with them. And I don't look too much like the back end of a bus...
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:51, closed)

@chickenlady
Ah, you be lovely!

I've approched women on occasion and asked them if they fancy a drink or a dance (or even offer a random observation on the night or surroundings. I once spent a charming evening in discussion with a burlesque dancer after pointing out how uncomfortable a particular table dancer looked as she kept banging her head on the ceiling). Many have told me to bugger off, or worse, ignore me. I was grateful to the, in fairness, more than a few, who said either, 'You're nice, but I'm taken',you're not my type but I'm sure you're lovely' etc. It may be bullshit, but at least I didn't have my confidence punded into dust.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:51, closed)

SOrry
I can't listen to Kate bush without wanting to tear my ears off.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:52, closed)

*Hurrahs in favour of B3ta dating*
dating post-25, when all friends are settled and impossible to prise out of the house, is a fugging nightmare.

Seems like there's lots of people in the same preicament, its just that we're all at home on B3ta.

Explains a lot, really.
(G-Lo, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:54, closed)

Right...the witching hour is approaching and there's a strong chance I'll turn into a pumpkin...
So I'm off to shut my eyes for seven hours.

I'll catch up with you lovely people tomorrow.


:)
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:57, closed)

there'd also
be a small but fearsome group of witty, gorgeous looking, successful, high earning, sexually magnetic people on /talk taking the piss out of it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:00, closed)

@beckysjsbx
Aw, but Peter Gabriel does the best high note ever in it!
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:03, closed)

@SFGhost
Yeah pretty much, but I'm currently feeling rather bitter over the 'oh yr a really nice guy but not really my type. Look at him over there - he's punching a kitten, isn't he manly' conversation (admittedly highly boiled down version) I had a few weeks ago with a girl whom I'm am completely in love with.

I'd call her a bitch but that wouldn't be true.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:04, closed)

@rachel
Well let them mock.
We shall capture and assimiliate them into our misfit collective

"One of us! One of us!" etc.

*prays the reference is picked up on*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:04, closed)

But can you honestly say
You'd like to be with a girl who finds a guy who punches kittens (stupid example I know, but for want of a better one) cool? I'd rather be with someone who isn't afraid to say "Aww kitty, it's cute, I think I'll give it a little hug"

Ahh fuckem Ms Swipe
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:08, closed)

Well
to be fair to her she actually finds that kind of guy deeply irritating... which in a way makes the whole thing even more annoying. I'm apparently what shes looking for... but not me.

The punching kittens thing pretty much sums up previous girls I've been after though.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:10, closed)

Well, harsh as it may sound
if she doesn't want you and you've made it clear to her how you feel then she's not worth hanging around torturing yourself for.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:23, closed)

@Becky
I suppose so...

*doesn't, at this stage, really believe that though*
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:25, closed)

Difficult not to feel bad when she's a friend or you don't want to stop knowing her though.
I sympathise thoroughly. Moving on from someone who's still in your life is difficult.
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:26, closed)

It is
Although in the 4 weeks since our 'chat' I've seen her randomly in the street twice and she's emailed me twice. I keep on hearing from a mutual friend that shes worried about me though.

Meh.

She is lovely though.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:37, closed)

b3ta meetah
Or, if you pronounce is bay-ta it'd be the:

B3ta Date-ah.

At any rate, we should pillory someone with Webspertise to set it up.
(Schumann makes awesome quiches., Wed 2 Jul 2008, 0:57, closed)

I met a lovely lady through b3ta
When neither of us were looking for anyone.
*touches wood*
It's going well so far.

@ PoD: "I had a photo up. Of sorts, anyway, at one point. It was removed due to Kaol-related worries."

Haha! *grins*
( Cawl, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 1:57, closed)

I'm a nice guy...
... sample conversation from my teens:
"Fancy going out one night?"
"Sorry, I'm busy that night."
"I've not mentioned what night."

From my twenties:
"You're a really lovely guy but I don't find you attractive that way." (Just to confuse matters, 15 yrs later we had kids together.)

From my thirties:
"Do you mind if I have sex with the guy I work with?" (Said by my g/f of 8 yrs a couple of weeks after her dads paid out a small fortune for a wedding reception venue. She had sex with him, the wedding never happened.)

From my fourties:
"I really love you, totally and utterly." Said by my beautiful wife.

The best things come to those who wait.
(paof2 Nude might not be rude, but rude could be nude..., Wed 2 Jul 2008, 12:04, closed)

www.b3tadating.com
So, any single 30-35 female b3tans with a WF1 postcode? I don't have an address fetish, I just can't afford to buy petrol...
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 13:37, closed)

b3ta dating
Seems like a good idea. Although to be honest, I'm not sure if now's the right time for me to be looking for a relationship (what with me being unemployed and not sure where I'll be ending up etc.).

One thing about most of the QOTW regulars is that they're all 'characters' - that is, all individuals. And of course they're all oddballs.

QOTW is sort of like an inverse dating-agency. Instead of seeing people at their best, you see them at their worst. One idea I had for b3ta matchmaking is instead of checking off a series of tick boxes and seeing who has the most matching tick boxes, everyone is to list who they think should pair up with who not including themselves, and from everyones' lists, gather conclusions. It's more human that way.


@The Ghost of Stephen Foster
Well said dude!

* gives man-hugs to all the other 'nice guys' out there *

* gived lady-hugs to the lasses who appreciate 'nice guys' *
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 15:12, closed)

B3ta-meet-ah sounds great
Presumably lots of people with a similar sense of humour, lack of sense of propriety, interest in things fluffeh and sexeh as well as bad jokes, Firefly, random cult references and interesting swearwordage.

And the people here are really weird. Which is great. Strange girls are attractive. Convention-following dimbo-shits with no interesting personal problems and no interest in dressing as pirates are *not* sexy.
(nimchimpski, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 15:37, closed)

You wanna know what's not sexy?
Getting fucking stood up by the same guy twice. Second time was today in Covent Garden after I made the effort to prettify myself after work and head over there, endure the swarms of dozy tourists. I call him and his phone's just ringing out.

Never again.

*huffs*
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 20:35, closed)

Perhaps he has the sex-drive of a tortoise
or was intimidated, or a bit on the gay side, or an arogant bad-mannered loser with no real ability to be in an interesting and fulfilling relationship. Or maybe, whilst on the tube, something shiney distracted him and he fell over and he hurt his knee very much. And he cried and cried but nobody came.

I'm sure there's a slap-coated fake-tan cellulite beast out there for him, with the laugh of a braying spak donkey and the IQ of phlegm.

He has no respect for the Becky! Burn him. Burn him real bad.
(nimchimpski, Thu 3 Jul 2008, 9:14, closed)