b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » It's not me, it's the drugs talking » Page 15 | Search
This is a question It's not me, it's the drugs talking

They make you do stupid stuff and say stupid stuff. Drugs ROCK! Old-time B3ta person Fraser says, "I remember turning to a flatmate once, after getting stoned and sitting through an episode of Casualty, and proclaiming "Wow! Those actors are *so* talented!". And really meaning it."

What do you regret doing under the influence?

(, Thu 15 Dec 2005, 11:19)
Pages: Latest, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, ... 1

This question is now closed.

Mega munchies
Not that interesting but once I ate an entire loaf of bread minus the ends of course and one of those bags of grated cheese as cheese on toast. I was still bloody hungry and stoned.
My stoner mate's mum is now my boss which is a bit uncomfortable sometimes!
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 17:10, Reply)
Oh the memories.
I personally have not done anything too bad on drugs. I seem to handle them well and dont flake or freak out. A few stories though:

Pills: Apart from forgetting what the fuck i'm talking about every ten seconds, I'm not too bad on pills. Although i smoke far too many bongs, anyway. We had a makeshift bong crafted from a small black tango bottle, this thing was fucking rank. Me and a few mates dropped and were having a merry time when Gibbo reaches to take a swig of his apple tango. It took him a few seconds after taking a drink to realise he had just necked a good mouthful of bongwater Much spewing ensued. He emerged saying "please dont tell anyone". Yeah right...

Same night, Keith voluntered to smoke a wasp in a hot knife. Tasty... Much spewing ensued.

After seeing Judge Jules earlier this year, went back to an all night afterparty totally spazwankled. This party was packed with people doing the most amazing impressions of a T-Rex (the arms) and amongst the norm- people doing the wall of death while sitting in their chair. I saw a boy in the kitchen pick up the fairy liquid, pour a small measure in a glass and fill it up. "Thats not juice mate" i shouted. Too late, he downed quite a bit before realising. I laughed my ass off for ages about that one.

Same party, my mate managed to put the lit end of a ciggie in his mouth 3 times (same ciggarette).

Party at mine: My ex double dropped and spent the whole night freaking out doing THE best T-Rex impression EVER (totally spaz-handed) and wouldnt let anyone try and straighten her arms because it hurt too much...? Crazy bastard, she went to bed still trying to turn herself inside out.

The only thing i have done is make myself really ill once. At my mates flat for his 21st I thought it would be an AMAZING IDEA for us all to jump in his sauna. it was good but i didnt drink anything afterwards. To say i was rough the next day does not touch it, I was fucked.

Will post more later about other drugs, I'm going home to smoke a bowl.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 16:46, Reply)
E's and ex's
Something more relevant to the question which is after all about regrets.

Not being averse to trying out new things, I was offered an E from a very good and trusted friend and so proceeded to gobble it down. Although I'd heard tell of the feelings of love and euphoria towards your fellow man this drug induces, I wasn't quite prepared for the actual love fest I experienced.

What I do regret is copping off with my twat of an ex and thus ruining the budding relationship I had just started with possibly the nicest sweetest man I had ever and will ever meet.

I also regret not smashing said ex's face to a pulp when I found out that it was him who made sure the sweet new guy found out all about it in the most humiliating way possible, and quite rightly dumping me in a similar fashion.

(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 16:39, Reply)
Mushrooms, many years ago... I was struck suddenly by the shiny curved elegance of the simple paperclip.

I announced this to the world in general: "Consider the paperclip - curved, twisted, spiraling and purposeful... In its natural form, it holds together paper perfectly.

Somehow though, we're never satisfied by that. We're all tempted to straighten out the paperclip - I know I am - but it never goes perfectly straight, does it?
You'll try to force it, but you only weaken the wire.
Then you try to bend it back to its paperclip shape, but it never goes, does it?

Leave the paperclip alone. It's meant to be twisted. If you force it against its nature, it breaks, or at best it's deformed and less strong.

Like life, really."

This while the rest of the room were convulsing in giggles to the sounds of Brain Salad Surgery by Emerson Lake and Palmer.

Pearl before hippies.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 16:22, Reply)
Hmmm, drugs
One time me and my attorney went on a mad drug fuelled trip to vegas. On the way i hallucinated that there were a load of bats surrounding the car, then there was a hitch hiker who looked a lot like Tobey Maguire, weird. I was going to vegas to cover this bike race... hold on, thats a film. OH oh right, there was this one time on heroin when i saw my mate sick boys dead baby crawl across the ceiling towards me... No thats a film too.

There was the time i posted on b3ta after 4 buckets and made a load of stuff up, but thats neither here nor there. I apologise for nothing. Bumble.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 16:16, Reply)
itchy teeth
In my youth I worked in a little independent record shop. It was the week before christmas and the place was chaotic to say the least. The three of us who worked there were all stressed out and knackered, so the manageress offered to make everyone a cup of 'special' tea. As I took the first couple of sips I decided that the speciality biscuits I'd seen in M&S down the road would be a perfect touch. I took a big gulp of tea and set off.

As I was standing next to an old biddie looking at the biscuits I felt this wonderful surge of energy and enlightenment along with very itchy teeth I now know is the come-up on speed. Thanks to Becca's special tea, I had a twenty minute conversation with the biddie about how irritating itchy teeth were - her obviously talking about dentures and me talking about something completely different. I then proceeded to the checkout where I spent a ridiculous amount of time telling the checkout girl how 'I fancied these bisciuts 20 mins ago and now I don't but I'm still buying them cos they look nice don't they and isn't it busy and ...' while the queue just got larger and larger behind me.

I went back to the shop, biscuits in hand and finished my remaining half-cup of 'special tea'. The day went swimmingly and I was even praised by a number of customers about my friendliness and willingness to chat to them even though the shop was so busy. It was only a year or so later when i tried speed for what I thought was the first time and recognised the itchy teeth that I realised that 'special tea' did not just contain some nice fresh milk and maybe a pro plus or two.

Cheers Becca for my first foray into class A's. Wonderful.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 16:05, Reply)
little green men
Many moons ago I was in the woods near the back of my house with my then boyfriend. I can't quite remember what we were under the influence of, but I had the most wonderful time.

It was mid-winter and there was snow on the ground, but the grass was still visible in little clumps. I had the most wonderful feeling of well-being as I sat on a tree stump and watched little men in green and white football kit running around the clearing. It was during this time that I became convinced that 'everything is your mother's elbow', a notion about children's first conscious awarness of the intricacies of the big wide world around them. Lovely.

Shame the boyfriend turned out to be a total twat and slept with the ginger slapper known locally as 'the trog'or that memory would be the bestest ever.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 15:42, Reply)
I regret
taking drugs in the 1st place.

then continuing to take them for the last 15 years ya twatting cunts.

and yes. i am on them now.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 15:41, Reply)
I've never really said anything crazy on drugs. Not that I can remember, anyway. But I've said some silly things when drunk.

My favourite was on Christmas Eve a few years ago. I was in the local and it was packed out. I was having a drink with some friends including one of my best mates and his fiancee, Claire. I'd been out all day so I was pretty fried. Towards the end of the night, I put my arm around Claire and, in a moment of overwhelming festive passion, told her, "Claire, I love you! In fact, you're like a sister to me. So I'd just fuck you gently."
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 14:31, Reply)
Rez Crew
i am 13, dolled up to the nines, and in my friend Ians Blue Escort (I should say at this point Ian's dad is a high ranking copper and he has brought his old mans police jacket to wear at the rave - our ian is a lovely chap but a bit thick). Also in the car is my boyfriend, Flump and Dinsey. We are on our way to the Rez, smoking joints and downing cider to get us started.

Going down the motorway, we overtake a bus load of Rezzers and wave and tooting of horns commences, then, suddenly the bonnet of the escort flips up and sticks to the windscreen. FUCK! Flump is the best driver so as calmly as he can he instructs ian to put his hazards on while slowing down and pull into the hard shoulder.

We manage it. We are all recovering at the road side with loads of cars going past jeering cos we've broke down and Ian says... "Oh, I can't have shut the bunnet right. I put my bag of pills under there before i left."


The car was fucked. Ian was going nuts kicking it and then started jumping up and down on it and by jees, you know - he fixed it! His bunnet was a fucking right off and the windscreen was cracked but at least we made it to the Rez!

It was the last Rez I went to. 12 hours of Rotterdam head fuck.

Ach well, at least we weren't all killed.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 13:35, Reply)
One particular night, after getting a little stoned at a party, I was trying to relax in the garden of this party and gather my thoughts when I heard footsteps behind me. I became convinced there was someone stalking me but I couldn't see anything, just this sort of shadow. I thought it was a killer dwarf...have you ever seen "Don't Look Now" -? The midget at the end? I thought it was that. I was terrified.

Actually, it tured out it was a fucking goat. And a smaller one that looked like it's offspring. I couldn't decide whether they were real or not. So I tried to ride one, and it became apparent that it was real, and also very pissed off.

It was extremely surreal and I was a little bit edgy so I went back into the party and drank a lot of Bacardi to make it all better
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 12:55, Reply)
"It's a fair cop......"
Another one from my mis-spent 20's.

1995 - Clubbing in a Stoke on Trent repetive beats, strobes and fog sweat-pit. 5 of us all off our mash on E. A pretty non-standard excursion from our usual bonging and playing cards. Top night.

3am - on the A500 D road heading towards the M6 from Stoke - all 5 of us have a spliff each, all 5 of us are carrying varying "cognitive enhancers" - doing 70, still off our mash and listening to loud tunes in the smoke filled car.

The smoke in the car turns blue.
We all look at each other
The smoke in the car goes blue again.
We all look at each other again.
The smoke in the car goes blue and we hear a siren.
We panic - Tim starts eating his stash, swearing and pleas to the Lord fill the car,

I stub my doobie out on the sole of my shoe - showering hot blims into the carpet.

Steve (the driver) starts to slow down and we are screaming, asking him what he's doing - we're in trouble and we fucking know it.

Steve was suddenly replaced by Harvey Keitel from Pulp Fiction and in the calmest voice I've ever heard said - "Chill out, crack all of your windows open a touch - I've got this!"

We did what he said and sat in silent terror - he pulled over into the layby. Engine turned off, Dibble pulled up behind us and we heard the heavy footed clomping of impending arrest walking towards the car.

Steve wound down his window and Dibble got the door post of the car with his torch out - shining it in Steve's face and then it happened

"It's a fair cop officer - the drugs are up me arse!" blarted Steve.

The copper lost it, burst out laughing and said "Fuck off home lads - drive safely"

We did as the man asked and erupted in the car, I have never laughed so hard.

Steve took his place in my pantheon that night, right next to Chow Yun Fat.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 12:46, Reply)
Dorset Dots
I stayed for a weekend with an old friend of mine in Southbourne back in 1993 and on arrival found his flat full of the motley crew of his bikers club all smoking and playing Sega.

He opened a peppermint tin and offered around these nasty looking dark brown pills - microdots. We all had one each apart from his lodger who had a couple of Es.

The evening degenerated rapidly and my friend's fiance who seemed sat in fear and disgust in the corner of the flat for most of the night, finally flipped as the vibrations in the room got nasty and twisted. The lodger was loved up and getting very touchy feely - the rest of us were prickly with paranoia and anticipation of the uncoiling and imminent peak.

We were kicked out of the flat into Southbourne high street - and made a quick B line straight for the sea to get away from the dibble, drunken townies and concrete.

There was something big building - we could feel it and after 4 hours at the beach with the others jumping around in the sea, me meeting god and then finding myself sitting on the beach with the tide washing up around me and all of us covered in sand and gibbering like monkeys at the sights and sounds we were imagining - we decided to go back to the flat.

On the way back through Fisherman's Wharf, I took point to distance myself from the others and reflect on what had just happened to me - from out of the trees appeared a park bench to my right with a man being straddled by a girl riding him like Seabiscuit. I carried on and then saw a Fisher Price Telephone and then one of the others out of the group to whom I commented on the weird things that I was hallucinating. He and a couple of the others all said that they had seen the same bench with the same couple shagging - so we went back to see if it was real.

My sincerest apologies to the couple on the bench. It must have been most offputting to your stride to suddenly have a group of wet, sandy, disrevelled and tripping bikers come out of the darkness to surround you and poke your girlfriend's bare arse with a stick.

We ran when the screaming started.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 12:21, Reply)
The local psycho joins us for a smoke
Every town has one, a well known psychopath that you avoid at all costs. Since I live in the arsehole of the North East this psychopath is well and truely mental. He's been banned from all but one part of the town but when he does venture in we always bump into him.

The most memorable of these encounters came at about half 10 one night, we were sitting in our drug den getting very, very high. We heard someone jump over the fence only a few metres away and one or two people scarpered. I was far too high to get up and run so I just sat there hoping it would be a friend face. It wasn't, it was the psycho. He said hello, sat down and skinned up. After about half an hour of mindless chit chat he decided he was going to the chip shop which just happened to be on the route home of me and a few other mates. As we walked he tried to convince us to go to the chippy for him because 'They wont serve him'. We refused as we really didn't want to get roped into doing stuff for him. He insisted and was getting more agitated. I was ready to run as he has a history of slashing people with pointy objects. He must've been quite high himself because he said "Fine but next time you want a favour off me i'll not do it" and flounced off in a strop.

We saw him a few days later, on the run from the Police for battering some poor sod later that night. I wonder if he refused to go in the chippy aswell?
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 11:25, Reply)
more mushrooms
there seem to be alot of stories about mushrooms here. so heres mine.

picture the scene - Download festival, june 2005. a weekend of great music and a hell of a lot of alcohol and drugs. t'was friday night, the first night our group camped there. in our random 'cant be arsed to go any further, dump the tent here' moment, turns out we pitched the tent next to three dealers who happened to fancy three people i was camping with.

on friday night, one guy had just made a load of money selling his paracetamol as E's and bought everyone chinese food. what he declined to mention was that in all these chinese noodles, there were several bags of magic mushrooms. everyone ate this noodle and mushroom mixture and went crazy.

two mates were running round yelling 'chips are made out of potatos!'

me and some random person i met were lying on the floor observing th epink circles we saw floating above the tents.

another mate was telling everyone who would listen that bambies mom was dead.

a few other random people i knew went off on a treck round the campsite to find who ever was playing SOAD on a CD player. they never found it.

i guess there are many more intresting stories i could tell about drugs but i dont remember them.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 11:14, Reply)
Apocalypse Stoned
Aye watching Apocalypse Now whilst stoned is pretty weird to be fair, really really intense! especially sitting completely baked watching it with a few pals and flatmate who's in the TA comes back from what ever they do and insists on watching it in full combat gear- but you wouldn't know you weren't there man!
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 11:09, Reply)
Being boring and going on and on about Apocalypse Now.
On speed I would pontificate endlessly about Apocalypse Now and re-enact scenes from it: "But they *were* really in the jungle man, they felt it. Look at Martin Sheen's eyes in the movie, he's been there, to the heart of fucking darkness man. Do you smell that? Do you smell that? Napalm son, Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning. I remember one time we had this hill bombed and when it was over I walked up it. Didn't find one of them, not one stinking dink body. But the smell, that gasoline smell, the whole hill...smelt like...victory. Some day this war's gonna end"

I did that for four hours, even crouching down when Duvall's character does in the speech and tried to imitate that weird half twitch, half smile that he gives just before he walks away from Martin Sheen.

On dope I would just sit about all day in my underpants, eating cereal from the box and watching cartoons. What else are you meant to do?
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 10:49, Reply)
Red Bull flying thing in Hyde Park
a few summers ago I went to this Red Bull thingy, it must have been the hottest day of the year and being stuck in the middle of Hyde Park smashed on Mushrooms I started to think I was going to die from dehydration.

after half an hour begging my friends to go to a pub we started walking through the huge crowd only for me to halicinate Sting (the pop star) jumping out from behind a tree and trapping us in Hyde Park whilst he sung all his songs, by the time I got to the pub I was a jibbering wreck.

I hate you sting.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 9:57, Reply)
We were supposed to write an essay about magic mushrooms for biology.
i misunderstood and did a whole presentation on the smurfs :)
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 9:41, Reply)
The first time my fiance did mushrooms
It wasnot the first time I had, or anybody else, but it was his. Now, bearing in mind my fiance is the most Zen person I've ever met (being raised by an aging hippy and a St Lucian Buddhist tends to do that to you), he just sat there. Smiling.

I, on the other hand couldn't decide what colour the walls were, couldn't get off the couch as it was moving backwards, had to sort of launch myself through the bathroom door (it was like it was moored to the side of the house), and the top of the stairs was really funny. Without fail, as soon as I got on the landing *BAM* I was giggling like a loon.

Our landlord (who looks like a very pierced Gimli) was mummy, looking after us all. Whilst drinking bourbon and sticking sparkly whipsnade stickers to our foreheads and telling us the animals he'd chosen for us were our spirit guides, and intermittently getting us to poke ourselves in our spirit guides. Which we wore out (had to go out for my beau's birthday) to the pub. A pub that was holding a punk night, and I mean proper punks. Skins and hawks. And in the corner a small group of hallucinating idiots, and a slightly violent dwarf.


All ended well though, we went to a pub with a beer garden and ate their entire supply of pork scratchings.

EDIT- myself and the lad still have our spirit guides. He was a gorilla and I was a panda, if you're interested.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 9:29, Reply)
Frank wasn't there
First time I took mushrooms the first few hours were the funniest of my life. The last few hours, I could have killed myself. All the countries in the world started changing places...on my girlfriend's bedroom wall. I have never felt such intense paranoia and impending doom.

I'd heard that there was a national drugs help-line and thought that a phone-call to them would sort me out. Couldn't find the number so rang what I thought was the next best thing - The Samaritans. Spent a few frantic minutes chatting to the little old lady on the end of the line who got a bit scared and tried to convince me to ring an ambulance, but eventually she found me the number for talktoFrank.

Frank is a shitcunt. Frank wasn't there. Frank was out having a good time while I was climbing the walls. Because of Frank I spent the next 4 hours alone in a bright room with all of the clocks in the flat under my pillow just to stop the ominous ticking towards my death.

Let this be a lesson kids, respect the drugs. They'll bite you on the arse when you least expect it.

Kelly, Claire - do some work.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 9:20, Reply)
The first time we did mushrooms......
We really didn't know what was going to happen. But my mate was convinced that she has pissed herself, and needed to borrow some clean trousers. She hadn't, and wouldn't believe me that she had not pissed herself. I couldn't work out why I was a short little white girl, rather than a big tall amazonian type black woman. We both turned into tartan, and danced a little jig. Kurt Cobain's spirit had taken residence in my wardrobe, and we had a little chat with him. And my brother's phone was a little white mouse in his pocket, that scrambled up his shirt and sat on his head.

Then it just went really weird. Weird and scary. We were convinced that we were being taken over by the bad evil stoned us, and that we had to fight, so we could go to work the next day. There was also some mention that we were not in fact in a house. But a box decorated like the living room flying about in space. And that the dog barking outside was not there, but it was a recording that THEY were playing through the wall to make it seem like we were in a house.

After some grub we came down, and were deeply embarrassed.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 8:41, Reply)
i once did a shift on the milk aisle at sainsbury's on E
got so into it, i was actually standing with bottles in both hands, waiting for someone to take one so i could replace it.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 8:37, Reply)
a la kate moss
after a three day coke binge, i was utterly psychotic. had images of me running through windows and the like so, i got myself admitted to the local loony bin, thinking i could chill out, get some space, come down and get nice nurses to bring me cups of tea and magazines.

WRONG. So very very wrong.

After three days in said institution I wrote a very long essay and presented it to a panel so I could get the hell outta there.

Real mental people and addicts are not fun, though i had some interesting conversations (read:lobbed a lot os smokes) with a 6ft half cast girl with an afro who ripped herself with razor blades and thought she was Bjork... etc etc etc
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 8:34, Reply)
regrets, i've had a few...
Anyone else ever got completely trashed with their boss, waited until he'd passed out and then inserted pens up his anus?

Just me then?

Stupidly I took photos on my phone and sent him them. Idiot.

p.s. I'm wanking whilst writing this.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 5:56, Reply)
After an all nighter clubbing on "legal" drugs in Japan, my friends and i were enjoying a come down party back at my place. During this "party" my friend decided to make a vibrating noise and state "Look at me I'm a dildo!" to which i promptly replied in a matter of fact tone "Excuse me, but i do believe that dildo's do not vibrate. Vibrators vibrate, Dildo's just sit there." Cue stunned silence and then laughter, then grumpy flatmates complaining about the noise.

Oh and i do recommend going to Tokyo Disney on "legal" Japanese drugs. It's the best and worst day of your life all rolled into one!
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 5:50, Reply)
I don't do drugs myself, but I do drink, and playing truth or dare while shitfaced can be damn funny. There was the usual guys making out, but then it was decided that if you didn't want to do your dare you had to take off an item of clothing.

A friend of mine announced that there was no way she was mimicing that karma sutra position, no, not even with her clothes on, so ended up trying to remove her bra without taking her shirt off. And promptly fell over.

Said bra was later placed on another friends head, for what reason I can't seem to recall right now. Also somebody was dared to remove somebody elses pants, and attempted to do so by waving her arms around vaguely and mumbling about voodoo.

I also have stories that happened to a friend of a friend of mine, a habitual stoner:

He came to school stoned for his HSC english exam and got Band Six (That's damn good, for all you poms) - thus proving that all great literature is written under the influence.

In another english-related incident, he emerged from a drunken stupor to find that he'd spent his 120 minute English class inscribing a creative writing story onto his left pants leg. I think he still has the pants.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 4:48, Reply)
1) Once, after at least 17 Vodka's, I walked past a local airbase pretending to be a plane, singing "I've gotta be free!" at the top of my lungs.

2) First time smoking mary jane, I was watching a big clump of trees that looked a little like a car... Funny thing was, after a few minutes of watching it, it drove off. (NOTE: It was genuinely a clump of trees. I saw it drive off though.)

3) On a particularly strong batch of marijuana (that I think may have been laced with something else) a friend and I listened to Depeche Mode's "Blasphemous Rumours" and decided it was the greatest disco song we'd ever heard.

4) After one session, I spent 30 minutes staring at the speedometer of my car. (NOTE: We were stationary.)

5) I spotted a fly on the outside of the windscreen of my car. Announced my intention of killing it with the wipers, and my girlfriend (who was also stoned) got out of the car to rescue it.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 4:10, Reply)
And onother one...:
Last year at a party just down the road from beckingham palace (not a typeo :D) there were a lot of pills flying around. I took about 4 and spent most of the night minus my shirt and wearing a large fluffy hat.

I went outside to explore the fields at the back of the house with a friend at one point and saw the sun starting to come up, so I ran back to the house to get everyone outside for the sunrise. Bursting through the door I shouted "everyone, you've got to come out to see the sun!"... at 2:30am. Turns out my eyes were just adjusting to the light :o)

Took me a while to live that one down.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 3:46, Reply)
Shroom Regression...
I took a whole lot of magic mushrooms in my halls of residence once in my first year at uni at a mates flat. I was having fun playing some PS2 racing game when things went a bit wierd and I convinced myself that I was a small child at my friends house, so I started jumping around and being childish. Not so bad so far but then I went back to my room (noting the floor being made of peoples faces and my camoflage flag swirling like a lava lamp) and caught sight of myself in a mirror and had a 3 hour freak out session hiding in my bed wondering why I looked like a 20 year old student. Took a good month for my memory of my teenage years to return fully.
Shrooms are f***ing evil.
(, Wed 21 Dec 2005, 2:45, Reply)

This question is now closed.

Pages: Latest, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, ... 1