I'm only 20,
but I'm already called "sir" by the checkout ladies in Tesco - not "young sir", as had happened in the past - and I have trouble sitting down on sofas and then getting back up again without grunting.

I've also had to tell various people what Thundercats, Trap Door, Stopit And Tidyup, Hart Beat and Gordon The Gopher are. And they weren't much younger than I am.

Excuse me one moment while I stand up... NEEEEEURGH!!!

Oh, and apologies for making those of you who are older than me feel even older. You old fogeys.
( Chrico is a bounder and a cad, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 18:21, Reply)

Shopping in Walgreens
this lunchtime, I happened to look up and noticed one of those angled mirrors that prevent shop lifting, looked at my reflection -as ya do- and at that moment noticed how fricking bald I am ! Don't seem to notice so much when you look at yourself straight on. -bugger.
(gingerALAN, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 18:13, Reply)

FCUK IT
French Connection's FCUK campaign makes me want to strangle every third person on the High Street and throw a housebrick through shopfronts. I'd genuinely like to see it outlawed by the Government. I would vote for this before voting for a ban on fox hunting.
The apoplexy i feel makes me feel old, yet the last album i bought was LCD Soundsystem and i still have all my own teeth.
(inactionman, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 18:11, Reply)

Most of these things
have applied to me since the age of 12. It makes me feel old now that kids born in the 90s are in senior school, but I'm comforted by the fact that my favourite album is 2 years older than me and always will be.
(underachiever, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 18:04, Reply)

ffs
Get a grip, people. You seem to despair about your fate as if you have no control of it. You like what you like. Whether you're old, or not, is besides the point. Unless you die, you really don't have to worry about whatever clichéd things you get up to so long as you enjoy them and are happy.

edit: child abuse is not clichéd in this case.
(conkers deep, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 18:02, Reply)

Discussing what colour my new pillow cases should be.
This alone should be enough to inform me I'm getting older, but its worse: My friend said he liked White pillow cases, and I disagreed on the grounds that dirt would show up easier.
( Novander doesn't like you as much as you think, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 18:01, Reply)

The first symptom...
..was when I started to dislike teenagers.

I can't stand to watch MTV at all.

I think the best music was made in the late 80's-early 90's.

Top 40 music is largely garbage.

I don't understand hip-hop at all.

A girl in my office didn't know who Milli Vanilli were or why they were famous.

I am worried about cholesterol, diabetes, cancer, etc.

My little sister is creeping up on 30 years old.
(local_weather rarely posts anything, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:57, Reply)

when you
learn that the ice cream van is NOT really out of ice cream when he plays his tune...

thats when you know your getting old
( Dave - KneHigHbOb talks, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:56, Reply)

Not me but...
My supervisor at work resonded to someone's suggestion that she should get subwoofers for her car with the remark "its a CAR, not a disco!"
She then realised that this comment is better suited to someone aged 50 or above (shes 19) and said "Did those words just come out of MY mouth?"
(Anonymous Coward, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:56, Reply)

Ha! I Win
Shockingly, I don't feel that old. Am on the cusp of my late twenties, but I drink & smoke more than I ever have done. I still go out to clubs & will happily be surrounded by 18 year olds, and enjoy myself. My music collection is getting reaching new heights in obscurist indie wankerdom. Hey, I'm starting to go bald, have an accountant, pension & the like but I reckon I approach life with a wee bit more enthusiasm than I did when i was younger.

Two things that don't help though:
1) Your friends dating people born after Back to the Future came out.
2) 21 yr old friends complaining they feel old.

I reckon feeling old is the new black or something.
(Lord of the Pies, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:54, Reply)

I'm
37, and I don't feel a day over 36.

Two marriages, two divorces, 3 children. I could legally be a grandfather in about 18 months time. I prefer radio 4 to radio 1, still listen to XFM though. And, yes, I have slept with a girl biologically young enough to be my daughter (19) - fannytastic! Current g/f is 34. Feeling old - fuck that, as that stupid scouse (no offense) bint in that advert says "I'll always be 17".

Mind you, I do stop drinking before I collapse.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:54, Reply)

my beer belly
and sporadic patches of back hair


and i apparently have the mental age of a 50 year old because i prefer watching The Antiques Roadshow to Hollyoaks...

i'm 19
(Morphindel, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:50, Reply)

Oxford Street
My twenty year old cousin came up to the Big Smoke for a weekend of shopping. All she and her friend wanted to do was trot up and down Oxford Street for 5 hours, trying on increasingly tiny tops and skirts. I was exhausted by 6, and just wanted to lie on the sofa with a bottle of gin. They went out. Bearing in mind that it was January, and very very cold, they, being Northern gals, went out in teeny tiny skirts and strappy tops. And I found myself saying "Are you going out like that? You'll freeze". The look that passed between them confirmed that I am, indeed, an old fart.
(marge, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:46, Reply)

I'm only 29....
1) My first job was installing DOS on the latest state-of-the art machines (8086s)
2) Windows came on floppy disks. Twelve of them. 5.25" disks that really were floppy. And it was black and white.
3) When I was young my dad refused to buy a video recorder because 'they'll never catch on'
4) I refuse to buy an iPod because 'they'll never catch on'
5) As a pre-cursor to a mid-life crisis, I bought a playstation. It terrifies me and I've played it twice.
6) pre-cursor - wtf?
7) I worry about mortgages, life insurance and pensions. And promptly forget everything anyone tells me about these.
8) I don't want a party for my next birthday.
9) I want socks and hankies for my next birthday.

Oh well... I've been assured that once you hit 40, you cease to worry about anything. [cries]
(coderboi, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:45, Reply)

I can't listen to Radio 1 anymore
The music is dire and is infected by RnB and hip hop. If I hear Eminem's voice again I'll be breaking the radio. DJs who are older than the target audience trying to act like they're 17 again doesn't sound great. And Scott Mills is a cock.
(cursor2000 No human would stack books like this, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:41, Reply)

Oh Christ
I'm old before my time. I just took my cousin to the park, and people thought I was her mum. I looked at the charts in the paper the other day out of curiosity, and realised i didn't recognise A SINGLE THING. I read the newspaper. And have done for as long as I can remember. I've started to read the financial section. I get upset if I miss Prime Ministers questions, and cheer like the old men when someone gets one up on someone else.
I'm addicted to tea. I let an "ooooh" escape my lips when offered a cup the other day. I dread accompanying my boyfriend to gigs because all the other bands are "noise", I have to stand up and hate being out past 10. God forbid I should actually move...
I get mistaken for my mum on the phone. I get mistaken for my mum when I'm out. I'm currently wearing one of my mum's handmedown bras. It's half past five, and I'm already thinking about bed. I'm having a good long moan and thinking nothing of it.
I bitch about girls with bare midriffs and exposed thongs with my mum, and believe I had a good discussion with her about socks the other day. Thick woolen ones. I nag my boyfriend and little brother about wrapping up warm before going out. I have seriously considered investing in some thermal underwear.
I lament the poor spelling, grammar and lack of vocabulary of my friends. I'd rather have a nice meal than go to the pub. At family parties I gravitate towards the oldest people there, and talk about glasses (the optical kind). I can barely see a few feet ahead of me. I'm sure I'll think of more later.

I'm 17.
( useful_idiot, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:40, Reply)

And another thing - youngsters today...
should be out playing football instead of glued to the computer adding to a messageboard about getting old when they're barely out of nappies. In my day we made our own fun, out of string and sealing wax. Then there's that music. Fucking noise. God, it's bad enough that you think you invented sex and drugs and hip-hop and skateboards and telephones and jeans and trainers. A shop assistant recently told me my son must have big feet because I asked for a pair of size 9 Adidas, for fuck's sake. And another thing, WWF is about pandas not fucking wrestlers. And now you're all hijacking the thread for us grumpy old gits telling us how terrible it is because you're sixteen and feeling old. SIXTEEN! And another thing...
( finnbar has officially retired, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:33, Reply)

Live a little first....
When people on this board HALF my age (I'm 32) talk about how old and decrepit THEY feel...

Jebus H. Christos!!
(monkeyboys like monkeygirls, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:33, Reply)

dino
you know you are old when you read through other people's comments such as :
"I feel hatred towards smilies and the morons who use them ... What makes it so much worse is that I'm not even 20 yet."

... and realise that the poster wasn't even at primary school when you were using your first smilie online (that's _before_ www went public for you young'uns (and we were still using gopher)).

(and using terms like young'uns eeeeep!)
(kriste, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:31, Reply)

My mates recently asked me if I wanted to go clubbing.
Without thinking how old it would make me sound, I replied "Nah. They're too loud. Can't get any proper conversation going."

They were shocked. I had aged 30 years in about 3 seconds.
(Mick Jagger Ate My Hungry Hungry Hippos, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:31, Reply)

along same lines
there's people in pubs legally drinking who were born after the beastie boys were first in the charts.... b'jesus
(XRAYJAC, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:31, Reply)

Oh
and I've started to listen to radio stations other than Kiss....
(ricky_darkholer is blonde on the inside, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:30, Reply)

Working with people born in the
Eighties
( toadfish, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:29, Reply)

I told my then 8 y.o niece
that the first record I ever bought was Hey Mickey.

She gave me the strangest look and then asked why I hadn't bought any music until a couple of months before.

This was at the time "Lolly" had a cover version released.

Had to school my niece as to why Lolly's version was not the first one, and for that matter A1 didn't write Take on Me , and the original was far better, and had a general rant on how the world would be a much nicer place if teenybop "pop acts" were banned from releasing covers, as the majority are unable to write anything original and therefore we would be spared the attack on our aural senses.

And preferring to stay in with a nice bottle of wine and a dvd than going down the pub/clubbing.
(ricky_darkholer is blonde on the inside, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:28, Reply)

batteries..
...i feel your pain. i found a tin of soup out of date last month. tins NEVER run out do they? well they do if you're old enough
(XRAYJAC, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:28, Reply)

Expiry dates on Duracell batteries
I don't know why this is but I always feel really old when I look at batteries, particularly old ones I find around the house. Like I bought some for the remote control in about 1997 with an expiry of 2003, and thought "my god thats ages away", but sure enough 2003 came and went in no time. Bought some yesterday with an expiry of March 2011, I know that although it seems ages it will be here in the blink of an eye.

Please, someone must share my battery/time related angst...
(he who walks, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:25, Reply)

I have many grey hairs
My left shoulder aches in cold weather. I drink real ale (and am a CAMRA member). I wake up to the Today programme and listen to Ken Bruce on the way to work. Txt spk on websites and sms makes me nauseous.

I'd rather watch Horizon than Friends. I wrote a letter to the Independent (unpublished). I own an album by Bruce Springsteen. I took an interest in this years Booker Prize. I DIDN'T take an interest in the Brit Awards.

I don't understand modern slang. I have an accountant. I have a filing system for my bank statements and phone bills.

But the number one reason? My girlfriend usually goes for older men. I'm 6 months younger than her...
( naeonlite, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:22, Reply)

Eerily enough..
..my farts smell fucking awful. Worse than ever, exactly like the ones the old man would cut on those 'long drives home'.

Dadfarts. Fuck.

/29
(Fonkadelix is fucking bored, pass the crack pipe Mavis., Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:11, Reply)

When I was a lad
this was all fields
(he who walks, Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:11, Reply)

I Am Getting Married In 6 Months
To my absolutely gorgeous wife. I cannot wait.
A few weeks ago we had plans to out clubbing all night but instead we turned it down for a few bottles of wine and Intolerable Cruelty DVD so we could get up early to go shopping for Art for our new place.
The thought of staying at home with my wife talking about stuff seems to be better than going out with my mates and getting drunk.
I get excited when my fiancee draws up new designs for the new kitchen.
I missed an Arsenal game a few weeks ago to go and have lunch with her.

I am 22

on the plus side i get to have sex with a model 4 times a day!

...compromise is an art...
( MagicallyInept Bored Sig., Thu 28 Oct 2004, 17:06, Reply)