Countdown
Absolutely love it. Love the puzzles, the numbers...

At all times, except 3.15 to 4.00 on weekdays, I will acknowledge that Richard Whitely is a twunt of the highest order, yet during Countdown I will laugh my arse off at his jokes- "The best bits are at the beginning". Argh.

I even kind of want to be in Dictionary Corner.

Sob.
( Queen of Cheesecake, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 0:16, Reply)

Torturing my cat
My cat has these extra long hairs, and they're like whiskers but on the side of her body. i pull them and she growls, and its hilarious. She's got used to me doing it now and tries not do anything about it but if you do it for long enough she suddenly swings her paw at you. I know it's cruel and if i was a cat i wouldn't like it, but it's just so funny.
(something_smitty, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 23:43, Reply)

Devious child...
In school I used to make little bits and bobs out of blu-tac. RE was the best lesson for it, the teacher had some mad fetish for posters and always had a ball of the stuff in the corner of her desk.

I used to have RE before lunch so I used to route in my bag until the teacher said "close the door behind you" and go to the staff room. I'd wander over to the desk and get to work. She'd come back for her next lesson and discover all the posters were at funny angles because they're stuck down in one corner and discover a new sculpture each week. Started off with easy things like snails, then as the term went on she's be greeted by more extravagant things like a wheelbarrow, or even a little dogs house with a dog in it. I don't think I had time to eat that time!

Also my lovely lady friend and I used to suck the sponge in the bath until our tongues went fuzzy. Not together though.

She also used to eat crayons, and thought she'd have another taste recently to prove their yumminess. I think she was disappointed.
(Fuzzy, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 22:30, Reply)

Eating Marzipan
Just plain marzipan. I could eat it all day.
( Greenbat, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 21:25, Reply)

Personal Pictures
Logging on to gallery sections of forums and getting the location of people cars/pets/holiday pictures etc, then removing the image name to see what else they have uploaded...

Guessing at people passwords too. The pleasure in finding out that bobsmith uses 'bob' as a password is strangely satisfying.
(ElitePlotter, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 21:18, Reply)

Bone-crunching!
In response to cap'nj, i do that too. Clicking my spine, usually after exams or something, is so gratifying! What i love is doing my neck Matrix-style. Sit there, at the PC, click them all at once, and see the people next to me shiver coldly.
(aslate, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 21:14, Reply)

Creme Eggs
I get a perverted pleasure when eating said egg infront of a group of blokes on my break at work.

I bite the top off, insert my finger and suggestively suck the fondant cream off, alternating it with licking out the chocolate shell.

Gets them going everytime!!!!
(Enzy_Chick, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 21:07, Reply)

Hmm
I like to sit in front of the tele burning my arm/leg hairs with a lighter.
(Mr Slippyfist, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 20:47, Reply)

Furcadia, home of the 7 sins
Planning out an event in my head, down to the very last detail
Writing very private fan-fics, often depressing, stupid or they just plain kill someone off who I don't like.
And doing all the better vices: Drinking, eating a lot, calling people names, killing, sex- on online programs like Furcadia.
(ZooLurker is an angry chick with a mullet!, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 20:11, Reply)

sneezing on people
Particularly if someone's just said something stupid. Turning at them with a completely blank face and then sneezing - then returning to said blank face in order to savour the second between the sneeze and the victim going "AAARGH!!" in disgust....bliss.

Oh, and clicking my spine. Feels great, and genuinely disgusts some people.
(cap'nj, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 19:56, Reply)

Warts
I have a wart on the palm of my hand.

I like nibbling bits off of it. Usually until it bleeds and then I lick the blood off.
(Ariaxen, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 19:46, Reply)

When
When I'm all alone at home I like to stick a tennis skirt on and pretend I'm a famous sportstar.

I've practiced the old "huh!" and "agh!" to a fine art.
(MrBeansHoliday, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 18:35, Reply)

I like picking my ears
with unbent hairgrips. The Audiclean people would probably recoil in horror, but I haven't peforated my eadrums yet! (Besides, people who use Audiclean are big mincing shirtlifters).
(sporks, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 18:33, Reply)

Knowing that
I dont have to revise or work towards any exam and il'll still get an A. Seeing the rest of the stupid twats in my year working their arses off to get a C makes me happy. Not atall guilty... i just know its wrong.
muahaha
(homochicken, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 17:34, Reply)

Oh yes, now you're talking
Singing at the top of my voice when I'm alone in the house - even though I can't hold a tune to save my life.

Being a teacher - tormenting the kids at school. Including walking into another teacher's lesson, in a subject I know nothing about, and waiting for a student to ask a question. The exchange usually goes like this:

Pupil: "Miss - I have a question"
Me: "Ask me"
Pupil: "No, I need to ask miss - its about dressmaking"
Me: "Ask me, or I'll have you in detention"
Pupil: *sighs* "Ok, where do the buttons go, sir?"
Me: "How should I know? Don't waste my time! Stupid Kids."

I then leave and giggle outside. Abuse of power - my guilty pleasure. Heheh
(M-O-O-N, that spells James!, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 17:16, Reply)

i used to suck my fingers like a baby
until i had a brain surgery aged 14,
and had needles in my arm and couldn't open my mouth properly for days. that stoppped it.
(Slurpy The Frog, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 17:16, Reply)

weird eating
Eating ready-to-roll icing.

Well, in more detail...making it into figurines of cute little animals e.g. bunnies, ducklings - then stuffing them in my mouth and chewing savegly whilst doing the evil laughter.
(mrmistoffeles, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 17:11, Reply)

I am known to pluck my own moustache hairs
And then eat them. It's a completely reflexive behaviour, too, like nail biting. Half the time I don't realise I'm doing it.

Oh, and masturbating in public buildings.
(Random Ferret, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 16:54, Reply)

Now that I'm awake
I can think of more. Having a good claw at your sweaty arse crack/bit between your balls and your leg and having a good old sniff. Sniffing is always a guilty pleasure. Has anyone else discovered that bogies STINK! They are vile smelling.
I also enjoy pouring petrol in my exes letter box and dropping in a lit match when no-one is looking. Im not at all bitter.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 16:29, Reply)

Have You Got A Cat?
Then buy a laser pen.

And play, in the garden with the bright light.

The cat will hunt until it is exhausted and has to lay flat on the kitchen floor with her belly flopped out to cool down (Ever seen a cat panting?).

Soooooo much fun - and if you're really mean you can confuse the cat in to falling off the garage roof/running in to the fence. Maybe a little cruel but not as cruel as this: www.acts.org/roland/pepper/
Incidentally this ISNT my cat, although she is called Pepper and looks like this.

Can you tell I'm bored at work?
( ogwen69 has returned from Reddit, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 16:13, Reply)

Already Said
Every guilty pleasure I've ever had (and a few I'd even forgot about) are already posted here - some of them several times, so I guess they aren't that uncommon.

However, as they are my own personal guilty little pleasures, I have absolutely no intention of divulging them here - for one thing, the confession might relieve some of the guilt (and thus proportionately decrease the pleasure I receive from them) and for another, NOT telling you about them is a guilty little buzz in its self . . .

PS None of mine involve eating earwax snot or anything else that after being removed from one bodily orifice should rightly NOT be introduced into another. Seriously.
(kiki chunt now available in blank, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 16:11, Reply)

me too
done this then discovered you can start taking off slightly less than dead skin. ouch. it isn't tender till it's too late!
( Table, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 15:36, Reply)

When I...
When I'm driving my ice cream van, and have run out of ice cream, there's nothing i like more than to play my jingle over the loudspeakers - thus fooling kids into thinking i have ice cream
(Nyphur, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 15:33, Reply)

My name is Mr Hackenbacker and I......
Like Alice Deejays album,
Drink Vinegar on the Sly,
Looking at NSFW sites but,using my g/f's computer then deleting all traces, makes it all more the seedy
(MrHackenbacker, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 15:06, Reply)

Sainsburys
I work at Sainsburys and love nothing more than squashing things in the packets for example, marsmallows and bags of Sun Maid Juicy Figs and Apricots.

Also absolutly love it when someone comes upto me and askes to have their bread sliced because it means i get to use the bread slicer!!

And i also steal fizzy cherry cola bottles from the pic n mix when no ones looking :)
(Willis86, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 14:30, Reply)

I like to eat things raw.
Things like minced beef, super noodles, onions, pasta or fish.
(once_upon_a_time, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 14:11, Reply)

What a pleasure it is...
...to take Mrs Rabbits dirty pants out of the laundry basket and put them back in her knicker draw. She's downstairs now and I've just done another three pairs.
(tell me about the rabbits, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 14:08, Reply)

but the best...
When someones talking to me and i couldnt give a flying shikaka, i can (without squinting or even moving any other part of my face) lower and close one eyelid.
Looks really creepy and puts the person off.
Then i deny i know anything about it and scrunch up my face when they comment and ask me 2 do it again.
hehe i do this a lot. especially to strangers or important people (my muttis boss)
(Legs 11 last got some loving on, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 14:06, Reply)

.
Waiting till my Mutti has gona out and drinking her precious orange juice.

Whassamatter!? Im not good enough for the sunny delight!?!??!!??!!?1!1one
(Legs 11 last got some loving on, Sat 9 Apr 2005, 14:00, Reply)