Best treasure ever
One day I was on the internet Googling for the lyrics to the Rednecks' "Cotton Eyed Joe." One hit was to a discussion thread post from someone called "Youngone" to something called "The Question of the Week," which that week was "The Worst Song Ever." I read other responses and had a great time, and have been addicted ever since.

That is how I found the burried treasure of B3ta.

Thank you B3ta! This is the most fun I've ever had on the internet. [Does that make me strange?]
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:46, Reply)

pius ancientes
When we moved into Uni accomodation we found a Frey Bentos pie down the back of one of the cupboards. The pie was 7 years out of date (and given that these things have a long best before date it was probably purchased when the queen mum was a nipper). Our trophy was placed on a shelf in the hope that someone would come back after a night of indulgence, so far gone and desparate for food that they would consume the antique pie.

Alas, although it did make a good (yet rather dangerous) frisbee it never did get eaten - I guess our hopes were just pie in the sky.
(Kakistocrat, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:37, Reply)

Nice fuzzy story
A guy I know likes to go through the country and state parks with a metal detector. One day he found a high school class ring from 35 years before. He cleaned it up, found initials engraved inside, got the high school yearbook for that year and called everyone with those initials.

Turns out the guy had lost the ring on his first date with his now wife, 35 years ago.
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:32, Reply)

Many years ago
Nicey's family were on a day out at a beach in Kent when Nanny Nicey suddenly got really excited and made them all leave. She'd found a load of rolled up ten and twenty pound notes in the sand. They dried them out and ended up with about £200 which was loads in the 1970's.. paid off loads of debts with enough left over to maintain Nicey in biscuits for a few years.
( Wifey, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:17, Reply)

not me but a
local tramp (there are many in sheffield) was quite overjoyed when he came across a treasure trove of fag ends out side sheffield hallams learning centre, the joy in his eyes was priceless as he pocketed them. i saw him a couple of weeks later plying his trade on the bottomest rung of the ladder in the tabacco industry he is now known as the amazing fag end man

{insert phallus related comment here}
( Reme Philips laid an epic dump on, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:11, Reply)

Oh the memories!
Our garage has always been full of crap. When me and my sister were little we found a chest near the door whith old toys n stuff in of ours. We thought it was magic because we'd foprget about it and then have a look and there would be something different inside like model planes n stuff that looked sorta new.
My sister told me a couple of years back that mum actually changed the stuff every few weeks or so but she deny's everything. MAGIC CHEST!
( Blobcat Less Jaffacakes this year, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:08, Reply)

Ooh, another.
Could be urban myth, but I'm told it's true. Also not strictly treasure as such, but...

Some bloke buys deceased estate, formally owned by an old woman. Decor was vile, lounge room wallpaper taking the cake. He decided it had to go, so proceeded to peel it off, all the while wondering how anyone could have picked this revolting covering for their unfortunate walls.

So, he is peeling off the last strip of wallpaper, and finds scrawled in chalk underneath it the following message from the fellow who had put it up:

Fucking awful, isn't it?

A moment to treasure, surely?
(Pleiades, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 17:00, Reply)

He Was A Complete Arsehole...
We had this "mate" who had his own place (we'd all just finished High School), so he was tolerated despite his arse-holiness. So we went round to drink beer, but had to leave when he went off to work night shift at midnight.

Waited five minutes and broke into his flat and discovered treasure, to wit his beer. More treasure in the form of his stash was discovered in his wardrobe.

But the best treasure of the night was discovered by me, when I found his attractive, large breasted girlfriend being fucked silly by me, on his bed.

I know it's wrong, but so am I.
(Pleiades, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:45, Reply)

the lot of you are liars
i found the holy grail in my hand

dont know what it was doing there
(riedacher_bertram, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:41, Reply)

Elastic Bands
As children, we used to play in the grounds of our local firestation. In the bushes where we'd set up camps, I found the odd elastic band.

Only a few years later I realised what I'd been flicking at my little sister and brother - obviously the main 'used' part had rotted away with time...
(surfergirl is riding the wave of luurvveee, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:39, Reply)

another
again not me finding the treasure, but one day whilst waiting in the car for my mother to have her hair 'set' i spotted the village idiot 'Mad Rob' do a double take at the litter bin. He quickly put his hand in and pulled out a stripey knotted carrier bag then trotted off round the corner to have a peek inside at his new found treasure, a few seconds later he returned red faced and wiping his freshly soiled 'dog poo' hands on an old newspaper.

twat.
(cherry B, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:28, Reply)

When visiting my grandparents
I often went to play at a barren piece of ground near the river. One day when digging a hole (for the best reason ever: just digging a hole!) I found all kinds of shards. Must be ancient and worth loads of cash.
I took the biggest shard (which was huge) home and told them all about my discovery and my dawning career as an archaeologist.
Turns out that a few years ago local contractors used that site to dump trash from demolition projects, and the 'shard' i brought home was in fact a piece of a toilet.
( PoofBird ~V~, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:16, Reply)

abandoned village
My old man lives on an island (cheung chau) near Hong Kong. I was visiting him when I were 16, and we went for a stroll on a neighbouring island (lantau - where the new airport is now) and as well as him nearly stepping on a cobra, we found this abandoned village. yep - a whole village. We raided a few of the houses. dad got a load of ming bowls, and I got a bundle of chopsticks, and a dodgy book (in english) about the history of chinese sex.

Another time on the same visit, I came back from a wander rather pleased with myself for finding some rather nice vases. turned out they were burial urns, and contained people's ashes...
(teasus likes tea, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:08, Reply)

New house in London
With uni mates.

The three of us arrive and immediately see a battered cardboard box under the stairs. It contained a (later discovered to be fully working) electric typewriter, a prize instantly claimed by flatmate #1.

We proceeded to the back garden, to discover a slightly rusted but eminently repairable (and currently in-service, 3 years later) mountain bike, swiftly posessed by flatmate #2.

At this point I voiced the opinion "Right. If we find anything else, it's mine OK?" to agreement all round.

We search the house.

Nothing in the kitchen, lounge, bathroom, master bedroom, my bedroom, third bedroom...

How about that tiny box room over the stairs.

Opened the door to a looooong (5 minutes at least) silence from us all.
Mate #1: "Open it."
Mate #2: "You open it." etc...

Eventually I opened it, found it empty, put shelves in and still use it to this day.

What was it?

An Honest-to god satin-lined six-foot oak coffin.

Weird but true.

P. (apologies for length, formatting, laziness and the self-destructive nature endemic to the human condition)
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:07, Reply)

70's porn
In a bag, fantastic find it was, big hair and Casio soundtrack, but sadly not a single plumber or tennis coach!

Didn't find any tissues near it though!
(psychomonkey padded cell and drugged bananas, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:06, Reply)

house treasures
moving into a very dodgy shite hole of a house we discovered, a room with a very secure bolt on the OUTSIDE with a bolted window, a sawn off barrel of a shotgun (which we used for blowbacks in a Platoon style, cooled the smoke a treat & felt dangerous man), a large bag of white powder (very very old speed) and a collection of letters addressed to a bloke residing in every single prison in the country

such a shame we couldn't have met the previous tenent
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:05, Reply)

when taking apart the loft during renovation,
came across a load of old love letters, which are likely to have been between a former resident and his mistress. nothing that interesting, but hidden treasure all the same.
( mr_wicksy is.... old., Fri 1 Jul 2005, 16:02, Reply)

Frey Bentos hidden treasure
A friend of mine is a bloody awful cook so to save herself the pain of cooking she's a big fan of reheating. Her particular fave was Fray Bentos steak and ale pies that was until she discovered a cows eyelid complete with eyelashes in one.

she kind of went off them after that
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:43, Reply)

WW2 Bunker
When i was a kid living in leicester in the grounds of the university we(a whole bunch of random kids) came across an old bunker that someone had opened up for us, cue loads of spooky games as the place was full of tunnels and pitch black. this was our new place fo fun for a month or 2 before we found a pile of bones in one of the dark corners. cue loads of screaming and bunch of kids going to the police to inform them of what we had found and a squad being sent out to investigate. unfortunately it turned out to be a few cow ribs. the bunker was bricked up a few days later and we lost our hangout :(

moral of the story is don't let the cops know where you're having fun
( Kingtoke was shit at life on, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:42, Reply)

Hidden "treasure"
When we bought our current house, we inherited a large rabbit hutch with it - handy, as we have two rabbits. While digging the garden over, I "discovered" what had happened to the previous occupants.

What kind of idiot buries dead pets in a tied up plastic bag?

Bleargh.
(BeerPoweredNoiseFrenzy, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:34, Reply)

Bad eggs!
Age 14, I was making fried egg and bacon butties (mmmmm) upon cracking an egg open into the frying pan a dead chick and lots of blood and liquid falls out! ((heave))

Took it straight back to the grocer (frying pan and all) and got myself a free box of eggs a bottle of coke and a pack of bacon yum! (like as though i was gonna continue with that meal after such a gruesome discovery)!!!!!!

Apparantly this type of occurance is quite rare or so i thought until the same experience befell my best pals mum! pah!!!
( catweasle neither a cat nor a weasle, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:30, Reply)

A cow orker's
building was being renovated. As the outside masory was removed to be replaced, the builders made a grisly but salutory find. A dead cat, and a dead rat, still standing, facing each other, poised to pounce.

Clearly neither had been the bigger mammal, and backed down first, and they had starved to death.. That'll learn the little furry buggers.
( Dekazer, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:15, Reply)

*Sort* of hidden treasure...
When our next door neigbour's dog died, they did the usual thing and buried it in the garden.

A few months later their new dog decided it would be a good idea to dig up its predecessor and leave the remains on the lawn.

A fitting tribute to a much loved pet...
(Swirly, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:07, Reply)

Hidden Treasure
When I was about 12, a mate of mine found a biscuit tin full of ten and twenty pound notes. Hundreds of quid. Just lying there it was, in the tin, under loads of clothes at the bottom of the people in flat upstairs locked wardrobe. If that isn't asking to be had, I don't know what is.
(Arty Morty, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 15:05, Reply)

mates
I found my mate shagging his sister. Imagine that. We had a good ole spit roast that night.
yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
(cripps-zoid The rabbit buffer, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 14:59, Reply)

Shoebox of Doom
While on work experience back in 1990 for my local Borough Council as a labourer, I was asked (like clockwork on a daily basis) to do a mundane stupid job by my foreman.

On this day I was asked to go around the house (which was being renovated by the council) and remove all the plastic vent covers. And I found many a dead bird and plenty of dust, but the best was to come.

On the third and final bedroom, I unearthed a shoebox tied up with red ribbon. Upon taking it to my foreman, we agreed to open in together with the others during morning tea break.

We all stood around a boiling kettle, with fag in mouth anticipating something pleasant we could share, the ribbon was cut and the box opened to reveal......

…….30 used jam rags… hmmmm nice !

……I decided at this point to declare “I didn’t want any “…
(sorted, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 14:45, Reply)

yey drugs
my old hairdresser being a useless gak head, once mistook me for another of his clients and whispered ' i have the 'stuff' you wanted' in my ear while getting my hair done...after he'd finsihed he handed me an envelope and winked at me...i just smiled and left.
On openeing the envelope I found 4 grams of coke and 10 pills...i know it's not hidden treasure...but i'm still pretty chuffed about it even now.
(saucykipper, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 14:44, Reply)

(Muff) diver
The last person who lived in our house used to work on the oil rigs.

When he moved out, the bugger, he left both the shed and the garage bursting to the seams with his junk.

Hiring a skip, we spent days clearing the place out before we could move in.

And there, right at the back, was an entire deep-sea diving suit, complete with screwdown helmet and lead boots.

And sitting beside it, a suitcase containing the mankiest, filthiest ("'Oh!' Helga is shouting 'Shit on my tits you big stud!'") pornography you ever set your eyes on.

It must get so lonely in decompression...
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 14:38, Reply)

Whilst babysitting my little brother and sister...
I went exploring in the house my family had just moved into. In the loft space I found: Dusty farmhouse cookery books, an Underwood(?) typewriter, assorted scary dolls and a huge tin of coffee. All of this paled into insignificance though when I poked around in my parents' bedroom and found used condoms under their bed. Nice.
(bedsitmartyr : Doctor of Bottles, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 14:26, Reply)

Not so much hidden....rather locked away!
On moving into my new house at the start of my 2nd year i come across a neat black desk in the conservatory. It was far better than the rubbish i had already in the room and was ideal for my PC. The only problem was it had one of those lockable cupboards, which was actually locked. No sign of a key but clearly being made out of veneered chipboard it was no match for a large screwdriver. Actually it was and took me 10 minutes to smash the latch open ripping a large chunk out of the side of the desk as it went.

I was quite delighted however, to be greeted by 60 Marlboro lights, some blank CD's, loads of packets of photos, 3 gold rings, a necklace and best of all 2 videos. Thinking the best, me and my house mate sat down with a beer and started watching our newly found videos hoping for some homemade action. Unfortunately they're just run of the mill holiday films with no sign of nakedness. Still halfway through watching the second video on fast-forward there’s a knock at the door.

Upon answering I’m greeted by a guy that looks suspiciously like the gurning fool I’ve just been watching on a Maltese beach. Imagine the panic when he starts explaining he's a previous tenant and he's left some furniture and "stuff" at our house. Fortunately he wanted to collect it the next morning and was just checking we would be in.

Funnily enough his face wasn't nearly as happy when he was taking his now broken desk apart as it was when he was on holiday. Still he got his stuff back and we never got to see any breasts so who was the real winner?
(The Duke of Pontefract, Fri 1 Jul 2005, 14:07, Reply)