Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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New thread for no discernable reason other than crippling boredomInspired by my pathetic attempt to glean personal information which is none of my filthy pigdog business from RSwipe, what would you like to know about your fellow B3tans? Use this forum as an opportunity to put your question to whoever you like. The worst that can happen is that they tell you to fuck the fuck off.
Alt Q - Greatest Oscar travesty. Chariots of Fire, best picture? Over RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK?! Fuck off
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:25, 202 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
Chariots of Fireis better than Raiders of the Lost Ark
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:26,
Reply)
further proof that women are irrational(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:27,
Reply)
not reallyI just don't really happen to enjoy Raiders of the Lost Ark.
To modify my original statement. Chariots of Fire deserved the Oscar more than Raiders of the Lost Ark. Doesn't mean Raiders wasn't a good film.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:28,
Reply)
that doesn't mean that Chariots of Fire is betterit just means you have defective taste in film
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:30,
Reply)
I have excellent taste in film(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:32,
Reply)
the evidence suggests otherwise(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:33,
Reply)
I'm with Vippers on this oneAs is the rest of the right-thinking world
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:35, Reply)
nonsenseI have amazing taste. I just don't value flashiness over story*
*with the obvious and laudable exception of Fast and Furious.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:35,
Reply)
now that's just crazy talkare you seriously suggesting that Raiders of the Lost Ark doesn't have a good story?
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:36,
Reply)
I think the winding up elementmight be being missed here ;)
But as it happens I haven't seen Raiders of the Lost Ark since I was a child.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:37,
Reply)
you should watch itI might raise Darth's ire here, as I'm going to say it's not as good as Last Crusade, but it's still great
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:38,
Reply)
I saw the Last Crusadeand that was good. And whatever the other one's title was. I didn't bother with the Crystal Skull one though
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:39,
Reply)
Crystal Skull should be stricken from the recordRaiders is better than Temple of Doom, definitely.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:41,
Reply)
I personally prefer Raiders, despite lack of ConneryHowever, both films are so staggeringly good as to make quibbling over which is better moot
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43, Reply)
M'lud can I submitthe following evidence for male irrationality as opposed to female? The giant overwhelming mancrush the entirety of the masculine part of race has on Sean Connery.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:48,
Reply)
Easily explainedHe was irrefutably cool as Bond, he has a sexy voice, he never seems remotely flustered by anything and hasn't let a complete inability to sound anything other than Scottish stop him becoming a huge Hollywood star
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51, Reply)
That's not an explanationI think my point stands. He's a shit actor*, he's not the best Bond, he's massively boring, a bit of a wife-beater and his politics are shit and hypocritical.
*With the obvious exception of Highlander
Edit: Shit I'm turning into Monty aren't I? :(
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:55,
Reply)
He really really isn'tespecially now, but not even in his prime
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:09,
Reply)
That is quite possibly the most ludicrous statement in the history of the universeNo it patently isn't
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:28, Reply)
I would like to know if Kitty is as great at lap dancing as she is at pole.(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:28,
Reply)
I imagine they'll both say themselvesYou'll just have to get over here and find out for yourself
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:31, Reply)
I feel ashamed to say itbut I didn't look when I met her.
sorry BGB
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:35,
Reply)
you can rest assured that if you hadn't been sat next to meI would have checked you out
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:37,
Reply)
I don't look eitherFor I am a gentleman.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:37,
Reply)
damn youyou even make simple strikethroughs more amusing than they should be.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:41,
Reply)
*nudges Vipros**holds hands to chest, palms upright, fingers outstretched*
*jiggles hands and grins, while nodding*
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:41,
Reply)
Not as big as everyone wants them to be.But big enough.
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girlinthehole, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:36,
Reply)
They are fairly big but considering I'm fairly big all over they look in proportion.(
girlinthehole, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:48,
Reply)
That is not a statMy database of B3tan bra sizes is in desperate need of fleshing out
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51, Reply)
I am a perfectly reasonable size, damn you.*has had to say this far too many times*
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:45, Reply)
I'm notI can't help krunking or skanking
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:30,
Reply)
fortunately that is what does it for methat and crying
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:31,
Reply)
I look forward to ithow many drinks will it take?
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:36,
Reply)
Your rumour-starting was a semi-success.How are you, darlin'? I'm looking forward to seeing you.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:32,
Reply)
I can't fucking waitI'm going to drink gin in your honour
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:33,
Reply)
I can't fucking waitI'm going to drink gin in your honour
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:33,
Reply)
hahahahaI love LAAK.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:37,
Reply)
This is NO EXCUSE.Becky uploaded the pics from last night. My yogini looks well ace, and also massively confusing.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:41, Reply)
I sawits super blurry though so it looks like your legs are made of rubber
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:56,
Reply)
Jeez even I know what krunking is.And it's crunking.
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girlinthehole, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:34,
Reply)
Normally is a dance associated with ska and ska punkHowever, Kitty is rather skanky, so it could be relating to that.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:36,
Reply)
how very dare you, sirwho the hell dances to ska anyway
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Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:37,
Reply)
idiotsand people with no taste
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:38,
Reply)
ThisAlso, people who take the maxim "dance like no-one's watching" a little too seriously
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:40, Reply)
I dance the same, whether someone is watching or notbasically like a drunken gypsy teen girl
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Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:48,
Reply)
Years of Ballroom competititons have made it impossible for me to not care who's watching when I danceI've even been known to drunkenly look round in a nightclub to see where the judges are stood
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:52, Reply)
but you dance differently in a night club no doubt(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:54,
Reply)
I just wanted to make sure you weren't one of those yuppies that does ballroom dancing to 50 Cent(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:13,
Reply)
don't you grind with your girlfriend?what the hell do you dance to?
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Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:21,
Reply)
I'll dance to more or less anything, on the proviso that it's not absolute shitewhich 50 Cent is. Ms Foxtrot is naturally shy and doesn't really do public grinding
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:23, Reply)
it's notwhat do you LIKE to dance to
this is what I'm grinding to currently
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_9XqyB7bQM
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Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:25,
Reply)
Ideally?Pendulum. Or EBM or industrial. I don't do a lot of grinding, I think it requires more confidence than I possess
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:31, Reply)
oh ffsI have a feeling if I go to a club there I'm going to be sitting at the bar downing drinks to kill the boredom
(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:32,
Reply)
to everyone: have you ever shagged a fellow b3tan?if the answer to that is multiple, how many b3tans have you shagged?
were they any good? and if the answer to THAT is multiple, may i have their number? ta.
suppose i should answer my own questions:
yes.
3.
yes. NO - he didn't have a clue what he was doing. oh my god yes.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:33,
Reply)
One is only the joint sexiest wench on here.The other disappeared yonks ago.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:40, Reply)
i thought there were many joint sexy wenches on here?!(
rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:44,
Reply)
This is, of course, my own personal opinion.Albeit the correct one.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:57, Reply)
You may fondle my breasts when you next see me.(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:11,
Reply)
Not a single oneI am obviously lagging behind the crowd here
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:38,
Reply)
One. Yes, and very fertile also.(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:41,
Reply)
Hmm. I don't think so.It wouldn't surprise me though. I could just be wrongly attributing my lack of periods to breastfeeding.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:45,
Reply)
We miss him.Surely he can get here once a month so we can be rude to him.
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girlinthehole, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:44,
Reply)
Apparently he does nothing in work all day except think angry thoughts about his boss.He could do that AND be on b3ta.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:48,
Reply)
It's how the rest of us get through the days(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:49,
Reply)
You can all think angry thoughts about my boss too.He's a cunt.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51,
Reply)
None.I have been sexually assaulted by both Kaol and Catface though.
*weeps*
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:42, Reply)
ShitI suppose I've been molested by Catface too.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43,
Reply)
We should start a support group.(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:45,
Reply)
Every parking space would have to be a Family one(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:54,
Reply)
I married a whore :((
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43,
Reply)
I've had to airbrush myself in all the wedding pics and I still don't look as pretty as him.Photogenic bastard.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:49,
Reply)
I've been sexually assaulted by Kaol too :-((
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:47,
Reply)
Nope, none(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43,
Reply)
I know fuckall about the Oscars.And I'm not a nosy bugger like you.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:33,
Reply)
Alright Jeff!Flame Haired Sex Pot and I are discussing going to Battersea Dogs Home to play with the hounds. Jealous much?
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:39,
Reply)
Yes.*Wishes I was a flame haired sex pot*
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:40,
Reply)
Oh yes you do.She's very hot (and on here. But at work at the moment. In Battersea. But not with dogs)
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:42,
Reply)
What breed of dog are you hoping to walk?(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:45,
Reply)
I want to play with the pussies.(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51,
Reply)
when we meet are we going to have a massive gay off and sing loudly to girls aloud?(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:39,
Reply)
I only know about three songs, actually.And that's not one of them.
(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:47,
Reply)
Which three?I'll be happy to point you in the direction of several more
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:53, Reply)
youtube has provided plenty of options but I only LIKE "The Loving Kind," "Call the Shots," and "Can't Speak French"(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:55,
Reply)
Right *cracks knuckles*I strongly recommend you check out The Show and Something Kinda Ooh, first of all. Life Got Cold, The Promise, Love Machine and Wake Me Up are all very decent as well.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:05, Reply)
jog onthey're in no comparison, def leppard is a rock group, girls aloud is bubblegum pop
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Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:22,
Reply)
Grantedbut surely liking Def Leppard gives you a high tolerance for cheese?
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:26, Reply)
I would like to ask how any of you manage to get any work done.(
crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43,
Reply)
Excused!*bangs gavel*
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:46,
Reply)
You may also go free.Students receive exemption unless you're one of my students, in which case GET TO FUCKING WORK.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:04,
Reply)
I don't, reallyWhen I get down to it I'm actually surprisingly efficient, but that doesn't happen very often
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:46, Reply)
I can multitask exceptionally wellOn computers.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:47,
Reply)
i end up staying a couple of hours laterthan would otherwise have been the case.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:49,
Reply)
I'm barely on here now, during the day. Boss has just moved desks so he's now sat by me. Joy.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51,
Reply)
I often wonder thatwith me, I just work twice as fast for half the time. Given the staggering ineptitude of my colleagues I still look good.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51,
Reply)
work?Is that that thing I have to pretend do when my boss is here?
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:57,
Reply)
right, you [collective noun] of arse-helmsI'm going home.
up yours
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43,
Reply)
Haven't most of you met at least one other B3tan by now?I value my annonymity, like that jewish guy who posted on QOTW and was owned by Chompy in about 5 mins.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:43,
Reply)
Give me a break.I spelt intermittently correctly......I think.
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girlinthehole, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:51,
Reply)
Ah, Totach.I've never knowingly met or participated in oral sex with a B3tan.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:49, Reply)
has anyone actually seen PCs paperclip collection?(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:46,
Reply)
not and lived to tell the tale(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:48,
Reply)
'The Oscars' and the awards presented at said ceremonyare not, never have been and never will be remotely connected in any way whatsoever to how good a film is.
Every emotional wankfest about an AIDS-ridden Tom Hanks or some other fucking spastic will win, some old cunt will get something because 'they deserve one after all these years' etc etc.
How many Oscars did the following win:
Shogun Assassin
Tokyo Gore Police
Performance
The Harder They Come
etc etc
NONE. Because everyone's a fucking idiot apart from me.
EDIT Disclaimer: it's perfectly possible that all of the above won Oscars. I wouldn't know and cannot be arsed to find out.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:50,
Reply)
Where do you stand on One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest ?I think it's decent (I've got it on DVD somewhere) but not deserving of the number of Oscars it got.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:52,
Reply)
Absolute belter of a movieThere is no arguing with either of the acting Oscars awarded. A sweep of the Big Five may have been generous but each individual one is arguably fair. Except that it was released in the same year as fucking JAWS, but that wasn't even nominated, fuck knows why not.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:59, Reply)
Add to that list of films that were missed outMutiny on the buses, Minder on the Orient Express and Condorman.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:54,
Reply)
Did you knowthat when screened in China 'Leaving Las Vegas' was called (with heavenly candour) 'I'm a Drunk and You're a Prostitute!'?
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:55, Reply)
I detest that shit-awful film.It should have been called ‘Coppolla Nepotism Gets Horse-Faced Balding Cunt Acting Job’
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:18,
Reply)
Be fairHe had to act opposite Cher in Moonstruck. It's not like he hadn't paid his dues by that point.
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:28, Reply)
I can confirm that the films listed won precisely fuck all between themAlthough if you call a film Tokyo Gore Police, it does sort of suggest that Oscar-bait is not part of the plan.
We all know Oscar gets it wrong. A lot. Kramer Vs Kramer over Apocalypse Now? Ordinary People over Raging Bull? Not one single directing gong for Alfred Hitchcock OR Stanley Kubrick? The point of my question was to vent about these particularly sizeable errors
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:57, Reply)
PS thank you all for your charming and comical verses.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:52,
Reply)
Do I sense a slight dawn in your dark depressing mood?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 15:57,
Reply)
Hey - you didn't say you wouldn'tYou just said you were busy. Maybe later?
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:25, Reply)
If I was going to suck off any old drug addled roady looking guy from the internet it would be monty.(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:31, Reply)
Wow looks like your evening is sorted(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:32,
Reply)
I fear not.Unless the corpse of my ex is hanging from one, and a bag of money from the other.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:24,
Reply)
like he doesn't see plenty of tits at workand on here all day long
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:26,
Reply)
:( :( :(I hope things get better, darling.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:29,
Reply)
He's employing The Darth Foxtrot EffectTired? Lonely? Depressed? Cheer up - at least you're not Darth Foxtrot!
(For women, simply insert (hehe) "shagging" between "not" and "Darth")
(, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:03, Reply)
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