Last night Ms Foxtrot suggested that Lauren Laverne was hot
I said, in the time-honoured practice of men assuring their girlfriends of how pretty they are, that she was "alright". When asked why I did not consider her to be lengthworthy (her words!) I cited her accent as offputting. Which is true.

On the same basis as the crazy/hot scale, how fit does a woman have to be to carry off an accent? For example, I would shag Kristina Rihanoff even if the sexy Russian accent was replaced with Cockney, but would have to insist on the full Brook to go Brummie.

Or, put in a slightly less sexist way, what accents wind you right the fuck up?

Alt: new uses for Libya once we've nuked it to fuck. I vote massive Jeremy Kyle studio.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:07, 206 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I think the crazy hot scale is imaginary.
Used to make yourself feel better about hot people not wanting to sleep with you.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:09, Reply)

First sign of madness, Chompy

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:11, Reply)

First sign of Madness?
Suggs walking up your driveway.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:12, Reply)

It is early
but still valid

LTI
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:14, Reply)

It didn't warrant a LTI.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:17, Reply)

How about a
go and get a coffee away from the internet then come back again?

or

GAGACAFTITCBA
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:19, Reply)

Contains "GAGA"
Gets my vote
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:22, Reply)

It also contains TIT
but bummers wouldnt see that
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:22, Reply)

*mindpiss*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:24, Reply)

Cancels each other out
No score
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:29, Reply)

But it also contains TIT
I thought you'd got over your 'confused' feelings and were an all-out fruit now?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:23, Reply)

Haha!
All out fruit = click
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:29, Reply)

Hahaha!
I meant talking to yourself, but that's much better.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:15, Reply)

I tapped her up in a nightclub in Sunderland many years ago
trufax!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Tiger!

( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:10, Reply)

*Fonz thumbs*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:10, Reply)

What does that even mean?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:10, Reply)

I bought the lady a drink and canoodled with her
Is that better?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:10, Reply)

Not much.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:11, Reply)

I'm afraid we're going to need to know more than that
Do it in terms of bases, if you like
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:13, Reply)

I believe a quick grope was as far as I got

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:14, Reply)

Not to be sniffed at (fnarr)
She was probably worried that anything more and she'd have been all over the tabloids like your spaff on her stomach
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:15, Reply)

This was well pre her fame!
When she was in Kenickie
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:18, Reply)

Ugh, you should have had a word about that mate
No excuse for Kenickie
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:20, Reply)

Tits

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:29, Reply)

Is that an expectoration or an excuse for Kenickie?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Excuse

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:33, Reply)

Fair play

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:38, Reply)

I liked Kenickie.
I thought they were good.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

He waved at her from the back seat of an unlicensed Nissan Bluebird.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:11, Reply)

As a Bristolian, I'm in no position to talk about crap regional accents.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:10, Reply)

Bah, I live in Norfolk and it hasn't stopped me
I don't mind the Bristol accent. Friendly, innit.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Lauren Laverne looks like she has a hyper-active thyroid, with those big, boggly eyes.
The only accent that would completely put me off a woman would be Thames Estuary. Instant choan.

Also: I don't know what you base this on, but no amount of hot accents would get me to shag Bruno Brookes.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:12, Reply)

Fake gangsta innit
Makes we want to murder. See also, Eastenders Cockerney twang.

Fings are lookin ap, Awfie
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:13, Reply)

I don't mind a proper London accent, be it Cockney or anything else.
Estuary is horrible.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:14, Reply)

I probably couldn't tell the difference
Its like when people hear me and ask if I'm a Geordie. NE folk can tell if you are from Newcastle, Gateshead, South Shields or Sunderland (even which side of the river in Sunderland)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:16, Reply)

I know you're not supposed to call someone from Gateshead
a Geordie, but that's as far as my local knowledge goes.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:23, Reply)

I'd call someone from Gateshead a Geordie
South Shields - Sanddancer
Sunderland - Mackem
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)

There you go then
confirmed Southerner, right here.

I can usually tell if somebody comes from the Guildford area, even though you'd generally only hear a generic Southern accent if you had untuned ears.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:29, Reply)

Hartlepool - Monkeyhanger.

( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:29, Reply)

Given the nicknames
I think, overall, I'd rather be a Geordie.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:31, Reply)

Hartlepool have taken it well
The football mascot ('angus the monkey) was elected Mayor a few years ago. I like this
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:34, Reply)

I'm a Smoggie by birth

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:48, Reply)

Oh really?
Where abouts?
(TheColonel, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)

Middlesbrough
Moved away when I was very young. Still lots of family in Stockton and Thornaby.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:18, Reply)

I was born in Middlesbrough, moved to Thornaby then just moved back to Middlesbrough a year ago.
Currently enjoying the reputation it has courtesy of Location, Location, Location et al
(TheColonel, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)

Excellent news my man.
Most of my family are buried in Thornaby cemetery. Even the ones that weren't dead.

I believe I was born in Parkside Maternity, which has long since gone. I think we lived on Trimdon Avenue, and Park Avenue. I don't really know Boro terribly well to be honest.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:27, Reply)

I can't think of any accents that are offputting.
I'm not overly keen on Northern Irish accents to be honest.
( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:15, Reply)

I never liked the Northen Irish accent as a kid.
As, along with Geordie week, it was one of the two accents I couldn't understand when Why Don't You? was on the telly.

So I really did have to switch off my television set and do something less boring instead (well, for 20 minutes, then Kick Start would be on).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:16, Reply)

Dum dum dum
dum dee dumdumdumdeedum.

God damn it, it's going to be an earworm.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:21, Reply)

The whole thing was made up
turns out no kids sent in any good stuff so they made it all up and got some child actors to pretend.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:43, Reply)

She is fucking fit
See thread from last night you bummer
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:15, Reply)

I would
but I can't be arsed. Morning mate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:18, Reply)

Morning
I like laverne she is hot and kenicke were brilliant...
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:20, Reply)

You absolute ear-mong
Kenickie were fucking awful
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:20, Reply)

I was avin a larf you bum plumber

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:21, Reply)

Course you were Bobby
I believe you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:22, Reply)

I liked mansun too

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:23, Reply)

^ This.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:25, Reply)

Mansun were pretty good
A bit self-indulgent and wanky, but fun
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)

Did they do Wide Open Space?
That was OK
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)

There did.
And Stripper Vicar.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)

I dont know that one
but Wide Open Space was an ear worm
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Stripper Vicar was a great song
As was She Makes My Nose Bleed
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:28, Reply)

Taxloss wasn't a bad track either.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Punka was OK

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:22, Reply)

Girls with Northern accents
I just can't be dealing with the ha-weeeey Geordie screamers.

Welsh accents just melt me like cheap butter in a microwave.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:19, Reply)

Come to Wales there are loads of em

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:23, Reply)

Amazing shock!
Welsh people are in Wales
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:24, Reply)

I'm surrounded

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Funnily enough
I have only been to Wales once despite loving the accent.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:33, Reply)

welsh accents can't help but make the wielder sound quite stupid

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:23, Reply)

I don't like you at the moment.
you said I have no culture by proxy on facebook. THis was very hurtful.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:22, Reply)

Neighbours.
Everybody needs good neighbours.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:25, Reply)

Heartbeat

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)

My mate Lee looks like Nick Berry
hence his nickname is Heartbeat
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:28, Reply)

He must be a hit with women of a certain age

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Yeah
The blue rinsers love him
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:34, Reply)

I met Nick Berry when I went to watch my Dad being the warm-up man for Wogan. Jim fixed it for him.
Nick Berry is a top bloke and his sisters are both well fit. Shame we're related.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:38, Reply)

You are related to Nick Berry?
Or Wogan?
Or Jim?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)

Nick. Same surname, innit
Real shame about cousin Halle. If I could persuade her to move here then all bets are off, it's positively encouraged in Norfolk
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:57, Reply)

Ahh, sorry
Didn't quite get that

*drinks more coffee*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)

Halle...
Isn't she a blackberry?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)

Yes, I assume we share a blunkle

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)

Uncle Chuck

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:10, Reply)

Excellent work there

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)

Ah, fuck
Sorry Poppet. I must admit it slipped my mind that we were FB friends when I posted that. My apologies.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)

SO you still believe it, you just didn't want her to know?
Shame on you.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)

More that it was an off-the-cuff joke which I wouldn't have made in this forum for Poppet's sake
And if I'd remembered she could see my feed on FB, I wouldn't have made it there either.

(So yes, you're right)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)

I do NOT like the Stockport/Manchester accent.
And I'm really not keen on Liverpool/Birmingham.

I love soft Scottish, and quite conveniently I've always been keen on a bit of the Radio 4 style posh-voice.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Coming from outside england,
I can say truthfully that I like them all. They sound really lovely to my ears.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:28, Reply)

What? Really?
Dudley? Essex? Bolton? Lovely?
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Isn't BGB originally a Bolton lass?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Blackburn.

( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Ahh, that's the one
I apologise profusely!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Don't worry
it's all North.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:40, Reply)

everybody I met - Northern, Southern, Cockney, midlands brummie, scottish, welsh, all sounded nice to me.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

How peculiar.

( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:34, Reply)

My missus is from Bolton
Don't make me hurt you.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Sorry badger
I'm sure your missus is from the one area of Bolton whose inhabitants don't sound like they're in the middle of an aneurysm.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)

my mate from near Dudley
once described it as a big heap of shit and concrete with a Nova parked on top
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)

Oh seriously, bad accents from around home are the worst
Though I don't mind it if it's a little soft. It's the whiny ones with rising inflection that get me.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Anything regional
Home counties for the win
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Sexy accents : Welsh, Irish, a bit of posh totty, but most are acceptable if there is a certain level of hotness
Definite non-starters : Brummie, Chav-gangsta, cockerney

Alt: Can't we nuke it AFTER we've turned it into the Jeremy Kyle studio?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Welsh, are you mad boyo?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:35, Reply)

A soft welsh accent on a lass is lovely
Case in point, Merril from Dragon Age 2.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:36, Reply)

I agree.
I'm also the only person I know that likes a West Country on a girl.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:37, Reply)

By this I obviously mean an accent
rather than watching Phil Harding grunting away.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:38, Reply)

no you;re not
its friendly
( zulu eh?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)

naa, Oi loiks a bit of westcunry moiself

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)

fwaps

( zulu eh?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)

I agree with the 1st line, I don't have a fucking clue what the 2nd line means.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:38, Reply)

A character in a computer game
Voiced by a woman with a soft Welsh accent. Lovely to listen to.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:39, Reply)

*takes notes for later googlage*

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:40, Reply)

She's Gwen from Torchwood

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:43, Reply)

Is she?
Never watched Torchwood. All I know is it's cowboys, Lovejoy, and lots of fucking swearing.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Aye, Eve Myles
She was also in Dr Who
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:45, Reply)

That's Deadwood
Torchwood is the Doctor Who spin-off with John Barrowman. Sort of a schizophrenic children's adventure crossed with a gay blood-and-gore bodice-ripper.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:46, Reply)

It must be like the Truman Show for you

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:46, Reply)

This is exactly why I'm banned from Cardiff
7/10
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:47, Reply)

ann umm
from in
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:48, Reply)

6/10
Taking a day off clearly agrees with you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:51, Reply)

A day off?
When is this
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)

Didn't really get into the gay jibes yesterday, did you

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Ahh, OK
I have Smarties cookies, jam doughnuts and filter coffee. It is Friday, it is sunny and I've got the favourite in the National in the office sweep.

Life is good today!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Similarly,
I've had a bacon & egg bap, completed a decent run before work this morning in the sunshine, have salmon tagliatelle for lunch and am seeing my best friend for a few drinks tonight.

*croissant fist-bump*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)

I'm on miso soup at lunchtime
followed by sunny pint time I think
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:03, Reply)

Nice
Sunny pint sounds good actually

*pencils it in*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)

Oh that's right
Don't watch that either.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:49, Reply)

you forgot
"schizophrenic children's adventure crossed with a gay blood-and-gore bodice-ripper where they couldn't even be arsed to think of a proper name so they just re-arranged the letters"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)

I'd not noticed that

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)

Apparently when they relaunched Doctor Who they called the production Torchwood (as you say, a "cunning" acronym") to shroud it in secrecy
Presumably the budget at the BBC was too low to provide new stationery.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)

letters don't come cheap these days.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)

Fucking Royal Mail

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)

Nope, it's common to film under other names, stops spectators, I think
Star Wars was filmed under the name 'Blue Harvest'
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)

Indeed it was
I think that's why they did it with Doctor Who - I meant that when the BBC decided on a spin-off they elected to call it Torchwood as they already had all the headed notepaper an' that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)

She's pretty tasty IRL too

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:43, Reply)

I love the Welsh accent
Being a half-Taff helps, I suppose
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:37, Reply)

Do you have a bit of Welsh in you?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:38, Reply)

That would sound like the start of a terrible chat-up line if I didn't know you were Scottish
Yeah, my Mum and her whole side of the family are Welsh.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:46, Reply)

My mum was marginally Welsh, we believe
Which explains quite a lot.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:50, Reply)

Your sophisticated strikethrough-based wit, for one

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)

Nah, the internet fuck-wittery, QOTW lies, and keyboard hardmanning come from my great-great-grandad.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)

Impressive lineage there

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:25, Reply)

i e
ea
e th

Why thank you sir.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)

My first dog was called Taff
trufax
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:47, Reply)

Your alt answer is genius
Even better, let's send Kyle over there to terrify Gaddafi into submission
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:35, Reply)

Better the devil you know.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:43, Reply)

I don't like the Skem accent at all, I never have
However, I do like the proper scouse accent in people over 30, when it softens up, and stops sounding so harsh.

Mancunian accent can get to fuck, as can Dudley, Birmingham, and all of the associated areas.

Beyond that, I'm not too fussed.

Alt: Store all spent nuclear fuel there.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:38, Reply)

Morning mate
Thanks for the link, that cracked me up. Forest should be looking to pick him up
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:48, Reply)

It's superb, isn't it?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Really is
I can totally see some clumsy bugger of a striker like Drogba managing that against the Arsenal defence, too
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)

I vote for storing spent nuclear fuel in Jeremy Kyle

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:49, Reply)

I also find the French accent rather attractive.
Unfortunately they're always attached to hairy, chain-smoking women to whom my continuing existence is a constant affront.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:41, Reply)

Hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Woo! Validation online!
My throwaway comments often end up being just that.

*beakers*
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)

french does it for me too
and Russian. mmm.

having been born in Buckinghamshire and raised in Devon I have had little exposure to many regional accents, and I like it that way. Most of them make me want to rip my ears off.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)

Devonian in xenophobia shocker

( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)

xenophobic and proud

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)

Damn grockles

( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)

trudat

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)

also on page 5
papal cathlolicsm quandary
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)

Is that where the priest tells jokes at the pulpit?

( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)

possibly
I've got satan's cunt of a stella hangover, don't make me spell a word that I'm pretty sure doesn't even exist.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)

SPELLCASTING
C-A-T-H-O-L-I-C-I-S-M
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)

Ironic
Most of the bearers of said accents want to rip your ears off
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)

that's just jealousy
my ears are da bomb
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)

Possibly so
I've no idea what consitutes an above-average ear. Mine are pretty sorted for decoration, mind
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)

actually one of mine looks like it has been nibbled round the edge
not that you can see that bit because my hair covers it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)

God knows what mine will look like when I discard the adornment
I've been careful not to go above 8mm with any of them so they should close up, theoretically, but the one in my cartilidge is a concern
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Every accent that isn't London based.
And even then if you're from East London I'll consider refusing to talk to you.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)

...and you a native of the North these days....

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)

whereas what you were thinking
is 'I'd give her one at a push, but I'd be thinking of Brooker'

I think I'd have to agree that the Birmingham accent is utterly abhorrent. I'm not fond of Norn Irn either, but don't tell CHCB. A nice Glaswegian or Dublin accent is lovely.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)

6/10
Morning Internet Nemesis. The wounds you inflicted on my ego yesterday have regenerated. Do your worst.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)

you have been weighed and measured and found wanting

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)

A Knight's Tale is a guilty pleasure of mine

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)

mine too

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)

Guilty nothing
Great film. Delivers exactly what it sets out to. Anyone looking for historical accuracy can fuck off to Kingdom of Heaven
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)

Don't remind me of that film
Utter pish.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)

Did the characters say 'oh no' in a flat tone when about to die horrifically?

( thealternativefact, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:12, Reply)

I didn't mind KoH so much
although I did think that dual-wielding swords that individually would have weighed as much as he does was coming it a bit high.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Fucking wank film

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)

You masturbate to it?
I guess we knew you're not normal, but still...
( thealternativefact, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:19, Reply)

Haha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Same

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)

I have decided
that the best way to cut you to the quick is to not care about your arbitrary marking system.

I therefore award myself a 10/10 for damage inflicted yesterday, and I laugh in your general direction. You know, like all the other girls do.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)

Aren't we all thinking of Brooker at the vinegar strokes, though?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:03, Reply)

as true today as it has always been

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)

I for one have never approached Billy Mill roundabout
without a wistful thought of his lovely angry bile.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)

I love this "Billy Mill roundabout"
It is about 2 miles from my house
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Viz
modifying language for a generation. See also "Biffin Bridge"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)

I, for one, am usually thinking of his missus.
Lovely, lovely Konnie.
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)

I have lived in the Midlands for nearly three years
and have always strenuously maintained that I would never be able to shag anyone with a Brummie accent.
Errrrm. Apparently it doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would...
(berk, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)

I said the same about Noiw Joisey accents.
same result.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)

In my defence, he isn't actually from Birmingham or the Black country
so it could be a lot, lot worse than it is.
(berk, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:10, Reply)

"Oh Bayboi"
"Ah'm gonna give it t'yow"
( Kroney, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)

you fucker
I've just spat tea all over my monitor.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Yeah, if he sounded like that
he could fuck right off. But he doesn't, so it's fine.
(berk, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)

Does he look like this?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)

No.
Credit me with a little taste, please.
(berk, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:17, Reply)

I have no defence
she was Italian-American from Joisey and she sounded like an extra from Goodfellas. still, y'know. When in Rome. Or Queensland, as it happens.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:12, Reply)

Dudley & that soft-ass
Wolvo accent do my head in.

Don't mind Brummie though!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)

He's from out Solihull/Leamington way
so the Brummie twang is audible but not annoyingly so.

I would agree that Dudley is the worst though. Ugh *shudders*
(berk, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:22, Reply)

Kipper tie?

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)

I used to live in Leamington
are you from around there?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 8 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)