Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
« Go Back | Popular
Good morning.I went to see The Jim Jones Revue last night (it was, of course, fucking superb). I turned to Lusty and one point and remarked 'what a showman' as Jones took to the speaker stacks. Unfortunately this was clearly not adequately conveyed because she turned to me in horror and said 'WHAT? You want to shag him?'. Err, no thanks.
I thought it was funny, anyway. The weekend is nearly upon us - what are you doing? I have my meeting with ex re overnight visits and my mother's 60th on Sunday, which I am expecting to be either cancelled or completely pointless, but we shall see...
Alt: what the fuck is wrong with you?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:31,
282 replies,
latest was 14 years ago)
Try walking a mile in my shoes.The police have told me that if I am found to be within 5 miles of Dr. Francesca Stavrakopoulou I face a considerable custodial sentence.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:40,
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The little tease.She sounds just like my Francesca.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:44,
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Women love it when you pursue them through a third party.(
girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:47,
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does ones dick count as a third party?(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:18,
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There's a party in my pantsYou're not invited.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:30,
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When I say 'intimate photos', I mean 'erotic dioramas made from the rotting carcasses of prostitutes'.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:49,
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First thread read this morning9 posts in and first click of the day. Well done sir
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:52,
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I love the BruceBut her dress sense is truly appalling
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:56,
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She lives 4 miles and 1608 meters away from you, when she gets up to go for a shit you've got to go into the kitchen.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:16,
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Big Issues?You want to get yourself down to Oxford Street and sell them. It's all the rage.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:41,
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Don't mock the afflicted................................................................oh yeah! sorry, I forgot where we were for a moment.(
girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:42,
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Yes! I need putting down a peg or two and you're just the man for the job.(
girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:46,
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Rory certainly enjoys pegging.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:48,
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Or even if you don'tBRACE FOR IMPACT(ION)
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:55,
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Not that one, the other one. The MASSIVE one.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:51,
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The IntestinatorThe uppercase 'T' on 'The' lets you know it means business.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:34,
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What's bothering you, my dear?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:43,
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To be honest, nothing at the momentWhich is a little strange.
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girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:46,
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That doesn't sound right at all.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:47,
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I'm bringing sexy back this weekend. And in case you were wondering sexy is not the name of my horse.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:49, Reply)
You what?You've a minging hairy back?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:57,
Reply)
*click* and *shudder*(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:09,
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I am off in-law visiting at the weekendThis consists of a drive to Featherstone, followed by bacon and egg sandwiches on tap and as much Stella as I can drink. There will also be roast beef stotties and lasagna. This is a good thing
Alt:
Nowt actually, though the dozy fucker who I was getting menu ideas from didn't phone up Tayyabs until 5pm to find there was fuck all chance of going. Dozy cunt
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:55,
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A big flat bunSturdy to allow more filling with a hint of gravy
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:38,
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Well I have a migraine which oxycodone, panadeine and paracetamol have done nothing for.however, I have been pulled and pushed and had a ultrasound and the diagnosis for my hip is that I've either torn the joint itself slightly or the tiny muscles that keep my joint together. I've also damaged my back by compensating for my hip hurting.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:55, Reply)
owowowowowowow!My legs feel like I've run 4.5 miles. Which I have
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 8:57,
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I've not done that. I was in a minor car accident a month ago and she thinks that the jarring may have been enough to damage it. Put it this way - I can't weight bear on my right leg at all.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:00, Reply)
I remember you posted about it.Not good. Hopefully now they know what is wrong you can get it sorted.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:03,
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I've been told to use heatpacks,and to avoid any strenuous exercise.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:05, Reply)
Ooh, get a swordcanewith a springloaded cover for extra defensive protection.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:10,
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You should see a 'no win, no fee' injury specialist lawyer.Apparently they're waiting to take your call NOW. Billy Murray told me, via the medium of 'telleh'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:05,
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But dont fuck with his daughter (or something)(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:06,
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He's up on charges for knocking his missus and daughter aroundlollers
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:10,
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Different chap. 2nd rate cockney character actor.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:09,
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I really wish I knew.Whenever I near a good point in my life, I self destruct.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:05,
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I'm proper mental and no mistake.I could have achieved so much, but have settled for fuck all as a compromise.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:11,
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The only thing I do well is art and I haven't done anything for a very long time.All I have to show for my life is a few hazy memories of some good times.
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girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:13,
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Okay, I *was* feeling quite chipperNow I'm afflicted with soulcrushing ennui. Cheers!
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:17,
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This makes me feel happierCheers to you.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:20,
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Got a mate coming over (down? up? who knows?) from Shrewsburyso I imagine there will be a not inconsiderable amount of drinking scheduled for Saturday. Not expecting much from the football as it's Chelski.
Alt: I'm actually feeling pretty good apart from being a fat fuck. I've somehow* managed to put on 2 pounds this week.
*possibly the extra-large pizza, 2 bottles of wine and blowing off the gym may have contributed.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:08,
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You provide sexual services for your gym?Stop swallowing it's only piling on the pounds it would seem.
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:12,
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alt - I need a pooh and can't be arsed to get up yet.(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:12,
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Shit the bed then.No one will be able to tell the difference.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:14,
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It'll give you a reason to change the sheets, finallyand fresh bedding is ace. It's a win-win!
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:18,
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Amazon think I should buy one of these for some reason:www.amazon.co.uk/Evans-Lichfield-Wedding-Tapestry-Cushion/dp/B004OC00GE/ref=br_lf_m_1000494943_1_9_ttl?ie=UTF8&s=kitchen&pf_rd_p=235046027&pf_rd_s=center-2&pf_rd_t=1401&pf_rd_i=1000494943&pf_rd_m=A3P5ROKL5A1OLE&pf_rd_r=0APX9Z78A9B10JEPRJGJ
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:23,
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Have you had an aneurysm?You appear to be typing random words, possibly a form of aphasia. Should we call you an ambulance?
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:23,
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Crispy sheets that you have to crack to fold=rubiks duvet
No, YOU are an ambulance
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:24,
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I have never heard that term beforestill don't really understand it
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:29,
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I think some comedian used it about 20 years agoStuck in the back of my mind
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:30,
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Was it Freddie Starr?I like him. He's really funny.
(!)
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:36,
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It was on the mary whitehouse experienceI think Mr Newman coined it.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:52,
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It only works as a gagif you are old enough to remember the Rubik's Magic.
which I am. Sadface.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:53,
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When someone showed methat you could break them apart and reassemble them completed that was it for me, game over.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:06,
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Great.Now I have 'Saturday Night' by Whigfield in my head. Thanks a fucking lot.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:37,
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That tune is by the ex of my 'baby-mama'. It made him a millionaire.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:02,
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Utter, utter shit..Still, he did knock my ex about when they were together, so he can't be all that bad a fellow.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:07,
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hahaha!"I like he way he moves"
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:12,
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EXCELLENT NEWS, EVERYONE!!!!Thank God for 'Trudi' Styler.
She's taking dismal not-at-all-classic 70s Jamaican reggae film 'The Harder They Come' and remaking it! I think it's so good that she's taken that dreadful film starring the awful Jimmy Cliff and is going to improve it so that we can all enjoy it.
Hopefully she'll be scrapping the terrible original soundtrack and replacing it with some much better music by her husband, tantric masturbator and saviour of the indigenous tribes of the Amazon, 'Sting'.
I'm so excited.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:26,
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This will be as worthy a remake as Arthur.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:28,
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Starring "hilarious and shocking" Russell Brand?Or cuntdrip as I like to call him
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:32,
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Not only that, Will Smith is currently filming "MiB III" !(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:30,
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I've just realised, I've not seen MiB IIwww.reelzchannel.com/movie-news/9963/first-look-at-josh-brolin-in-men-in-black-iii/
Look at how happy Will is, I'm made up for him, it's so good to see him land a roll that he'll enjoy. I should write him a letter or something.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:34,
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Films I'm looking forward too- X-Men: New Class
- Thor
- Capt. America
- The Avangers
- Green Lanton
- Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows Part 2 (I'm waiting 'till it comes out before I see part 1)
- The Amazing Spiderman
- Superman
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:32,
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I will most likely watch them on Sky when they turn up(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:33,
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I doubt I'll see most of them at the picture on account of my crippling social anxiety in regard to going to the pictures by myself.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:35,
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It's not the fact that everyone will point at me and go "Who's that Loser?...whooo's that looser? ...whooooooo's that loser sitting by himself. Who's that loser sitting by himself".It's that I won't be able to decide what snack to get by the time I come up in the queue.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:36,
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I've done it once in Kilmarnockwas there with work so went to see Kill Bill
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:36,
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I really didn't like the Kill Bill films, I was ready to gnore my own arm off in that scene where she's burried in a coffin.I'd rather go watch a film bassed in forrest than that.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:39,
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1. I go to the cinema all the time on my own...2. If you have a Cineworld card, why don't you come with me?
3. Bring your own snacks. I took fajitas last time I went :D
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:40, Reply)
For about 10 years I've been saying to myself "Just pick up your bag and go, by yourself", but I've just not managed it yet.I've told a few people that I'm going ot do it, but haven't. Maybe this month? In fact, deffo this month.
I don't have a ciniworld card on account of me only going to the pictures once a year or soo, but if I like going by myself, then I'll get one.
How on earth did you take fajitas? Did you rest the little hotplate and all the condiments on the chair on front? I absolutely fucking amazingly love those fizzy slushpuppy bits.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:45,
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I don't mind going anywhere on my own:gigs, films, restaurants, pubs. Doesn't bother me in the slightest.
But then, I am an antisocial cunt.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:55,
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Yer, who gives a fuckI can totally handle the crown of billy no mates
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:02,
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I stop short of confused loner though(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:02,
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That's the ultimate accolade for the solitary man-about-town.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:15,
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Needs MOAR binbag and piss aroma(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:17,
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I think it's not that I don't want to be on my own, more like I don't have the get-up-and-go in me.... if i'm honest.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:09,
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I heard it's just 3 hours of Neo going "Woh'" while looking at ordanary objects.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:36,
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I watched Part 1 of the Potter film the other day.It was quite good. I think they're good films on the whole.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:38,
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HahahahahYou know me so well.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:50,
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Shame the books aren'tThe one I read felt like it was written by a 13 year old, not for a 13 year old
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:39,
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Wooh there!Are you saying you quite like something that is part of popular culture?
*Goes for a little lie down*
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:39,
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Yeah, that took me by surprise as well. I'm waiting for the punchline.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:45, Reply)
Same here, It's to easy to dismiss them as just children's films, but they get quite dark towards the end.I've also not seen Half Blood Prince, but I have seen all the others a few times, and HBP + Deathly Hallows Part 1 is being delivered to complete the Bluray collection now.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:41,
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They are children's films. There's nothing wrong with that.They are good quality adventure films, and they are both middle class and English. These are Good Things.
Like 'Pop Pirates' starring 'Ant Jones', eh Jeff? He gets locked in a barge by 'Tinker' from 'Lovejoy' and nearly misses his reggae gig.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:52,
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hahahahaCheggers was in a number of Childrens Film Foundation movies as well.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:53,
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I wouldn't want my child seeing the later films, maybe teenagers, but not children.Glade you enjoy them though.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:55,
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I regard under 16s as children.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:01,
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Jesus weptWhat next, a remake of Rockers with Lenny Henry in the lead role?
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:09, Reply)
I've had tickets to see the Firebird for months now- I better be well enough to go.As for the alt, swollen glands, difficulty swallowing and alll-round PAIN. :(
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:32,
Reply)
Is that a live action show of Nicolas Cage'sseminal Top Gun rip off?
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:34, Reply)
Stravinsky, you mal-educated nonce.(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:35,
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Innit. I'm nicking - and clicking - this insult.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:39,
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If I'm reading Lampito's post correctly,you received a substandard education and molest children. One is significantly worse than the other, in my opinion.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:44, Reply)
I agree. Educational standards are simply shocking these days.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:50,
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5 GCSE A-C passes are so easy to get these days(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:50,
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Hope the meeting with the ex goes well.I'm going to do some boozing this weekend.
Boozin' I tells ya!
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:37,
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Boozers are losers, Jeff.Has Keith Chegwin taught you nothing?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:39,
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Cheggers drinks pop.I don't take instructions from that Philbin Fucker.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:40,
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*Sways left and right to the sounds of Department S whilst holding a torch*(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:42,
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I am looking forward to freezing cold bottles of FREE Stella on tap All Saturday and Sunday
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:42,
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Bottles of beer 'on tap', Sporty?What a peculiar fellow you are.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:45,
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These puns leave me feeling drained.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:47,
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You disabled handrail holding CUNT*May have missed the point of punning... on purpose*
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:56,
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I also have an HILARIOUS tale to tellI was round at a friend's last night, gaming. It did not go well. When I finally got some unexpected good luck with the dice I exclaimed "Fuck me! Shut up! Really?" and thought nothing more of my expectoration. A couple of minutes later I noticed my opponent was conspicuously silent. I asked why and he replied "I thought I'd pick one, and shutting up sounded easier"
Well, I laughed
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:44, Reply)
Go on then.Tell us the HILARIOUS tale.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:45,
Reply)
Shan'tMake one up. Ooh, here's one! Bristol City are a really good football team
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:48, Reply)
Are you coming to Ashton Gate when Florist visit?(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:49,
Reply)
It's a long fucking way mateHowever Ms Foxtrot's sister lives there, as I may have mentioned, so if it's not a midweek evening match maybe I could attempt to coerce a visit out of the missus
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:51, Reply)
About half a dozen of my mates did Norwich away this season.It was on a Monday night, and the game was shown on Sky.
Why would anyone bother?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:53,
Reply)
Back when you could smoke in pubsIt was quite common place for someone to offer the tabs around, with refusal of a smoke usually announced with 'Nah, you're alright, I'll just have a Roy'
Passive lols.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:01,
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corpse with a rusty trumpet(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:05,
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That is so cruelGood job it is really funny.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:11,
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I was GLESSing on that one(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:14,
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Going to Norwich?You should watch Manchester United they are much better and therefore i can conclude better to watch
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:56,
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When does the hilarious tale start?I don't want to miss that, for sure.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:48,
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I'm sure this is like the trailers before the film*eats popcorn*
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:49,
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What use would one of those be?They don't have electricity in Norfolk 'yet'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:57,
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Just the spark they get when they hold hands with their siblings(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:58,
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Down in the country with the rentals this weekendAlt: pointing out all the hideous things that are wrong with me is more your forte than mine...
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:45,
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Tonight Disasterprone and I are off to the footyVery much looking forward to it. Haven't been to the Shed in years, and this will be the first time I've been with someone who actually wanted to go (took Ms Foxtrot in 2002. She liked the chanting, not so much the football). It's going to be a top, top night. Unless we lose. Which we will.
Sunday we've got a Ballroom competition in Birmingham, which means being out of the house from just after 8am til sometime after 10pm. But there's an open Foxtrot, so I'm happy.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:55, Reply)
Morning you irrepressable gaylordWhat's an open foxtrot when it's at home?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:57,
Reply)
It's 'polari' for 'gaping shitpipe'(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:58,
Reply)
As a huge Kenneth Williams fan, I was bound to.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:08,
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It's not that obscure, surely(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:37,
Reply)
You're forgetting, I'm not a chutney ferret like you are.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:39,
Reply)
Morning mateIt's a Foxtrot that anyone can enter. MUCH LIKE ME, HA HA HA. Basically we're normally restricted to certain dances because of the category we compete in, but having an open event gives me chance to partake of my favourite dance on a great big competition floor.
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:59, Reply)
His Bourneville Boulevard is a popular place for young men to promenade.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:10,
Reply)
He's GAY and has a flapping BUMHOLE.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:13,
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His Lindt lane is frequented by the fruitier end of the male spectrum(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:15,
Reply)
He puts his WINKLE into MEN'S BOTTIES.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:19,
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I think I might take the rest of the co-codomal my mother gave me for my neck this weekend and get off my tits.(
girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:56,
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You don't know what you're missing out on.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:59,
Reply)
I'll get off with your tits*waves and gropes hello*
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:58,
Reply)
I'm going to miss all this sexual innuendo when your wife has had the sprog and will let you near her again.(
girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:59,
Reply)
You can talk it fine, though.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:13,
Reply)
Tonight will be a superb night - I have clean clothes in my car, and a little money in my pocket...Tickets are sorted out, Forest are bringing them with with them on the coach, and they should be there for us an hour before kick-off.
We have to use the Director's Entrance (fnarrrr) and I believe we will have full access to the Player's Lounge. SHould be a cracker (esp if it's a free bar; if not, the beers are on you!)
Just hope that Marcus doesn't forget to bring them...
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:19,
Reply)
Don't be surprised if,when you go to the lavatory, DF is lying in the urinal.
I'm just saying.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:23,
Reply)
When he's out with me he displays alarming symptoms of straightness...but I will keep an eye out, especially if he's wearing waterproofs or rubber.
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:29,
Reply)
Very sensible.Don't stop off at any secluded woodland afterwards, either.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:31,
Reply)
+ as you will disturb my grave digging(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:32,
Reply)
I won't.... but, if he does get into a toilet and turn into a pissboy, I shall immediately go and console his girlfriend, who is lovely enough to turn a gayer (as seems to have happened here)
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:40,
Reply)
Dream come true mateI'm fucking excited just to be seeing Forest play with a fellow fan. Having access to a bar throughout the match would just be gravy.
How the FUCK is it only 10.30am?!!
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:30, Reply)
Can't drink in sight of the pitch though...I am mega excited about this game - tickets are gold dust, but we've got a top freebie. God bless the Forest team (and I am hoping upon hope upon hope upon hope nothing goes wrong and that the tickets are there waiting for us!).
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:32,
Reply)
At least it's on Sky mateAnd pubs aren't particular about you drinking in view of the screen!
I suppose it's too much to hope for that Forest, having done us a massive favour with the tickets, could do another and play well tonight
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:36, Reply)
It'd be good wouldn't it.I really can't wait. I may get on the beer and get the train home, leave the car in the city. See how we get on, I think...
Shame the team aren't out after - if they hadn't had to train we were planning a night surrounded by lapdancers and champagne, on their tab! Oh well, Wetherspoons is probably more our level...
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:39,
Reply)
I never liked that Billy Davies, now he's stopping us seeing titsWe might need to make it the Compleat Angler, apparently that's the away pub on account of it being the first place travelling fans see when they get off the train
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:43, Reply)
Yup.I'm not wearing colours though - Directors bit and all that is in the middle of the main stand...
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:48,
Reply)
We can see plenty of titsJust look round the Norwich ground...
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:49,
Reply)
+ "never"
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:03,
Reply)
Mix them with booze then get on a bus,so you can experience first hand what it's like being the 'local nutter on the bus'. It's an invaluable insight.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 9:58,
Reply)
ahhh it's panadeine.we call it panadeine forte here. We don't call it that at all!
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:06, Reply)
Anyone heard the masterpiece that is 'Codine' (sic) by The Charlatans*?*the ACTUAL Charlatans from 60s San Francisco, not those charlatans from 'oop north'. It's a great song.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:12,
Reply)
The only one I knowwould be the oop north ones
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:18,
Reply)
Depart thee fromme ye internette, good sir knyghte.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:20,
Reply)
*clicks together coconut halves**gambols away*
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:26,
Reply)
Co Codamol is for wimps!I'll be scarfing down my usual shedload and a half of Dihydrocodeine this weekend just so I can function in a normal (pfft yeah right, ME being normal) manner.
In other news I have a provisional date (may 16th) for my spine surgery so YAY for me!
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:26, Reply)
Dihydrocodeine's for girlsDiamorphine's what you want!
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:28,
Reply)
Excellent stuff Diamorphine....However my GP won't prescribe it for self-administration.
Killjoy
(, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:30, Reply)
Just need to go round the corner and see ma bredren den, innit..(
disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:34,
Reply)
I've a load of morphine in my desk if you want that.Co-codamol will do fuck all.
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:21,
Reply)
I once ended up with a hipflask full of morphine at a wedding...(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:24,
Reply)
Course you did.Was that before or after your dad was 'in the SAS' and 'really good mates with Bruce Lee'?
You're as bad as AA with his made-up 'brother'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:26,
Reply)
You have the story wrongHis Dad killed Bruce Lee
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:27,
Reply)
Oh yeah sorry.My favourite Bruce Lee story is that he died because he was too fit.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:30,
Reply)
Was that before or after he was the person James Bond was based on?(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:31,
Reply)
I think that was after*sings* BROWN fingarrrrrrrrr
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:33,
Reply)
He da man.Da man wit da anal touch.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:34,
Reply)
The man with the 'Midas crotch', you mean?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:35,
Reply)
That would make a great name for a game show.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:43,
Reply)
It was the father of the brides, his knees were disintergratingi didn't take any as I was an usher and had duties, so there!
EDIT: And don't compare me to AA you bent old twat
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:42,
Reply)
feel free - i get it prescribed to cope with chronic knee and wrist pain.It works, and I spend my days gently cossetted in metaphorical bubble wrap!
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:27,
Reply)
What kind do you have? I fucking love Morphine. I get Sevradol, I'm not sharing it though.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:45,
Reply)
I'm on sevradol, but the brand is meaninglessIt's the strength that counts...
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:47,
Reply)
It does enough for me.I used to be quite partial to a jelly though.
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girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:23,
Reply)
i like jellywith ice cream, mainly.
Especially strawberry ice cream.
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:41,
Reply)
Blackberry and Apple crumblewith real crumbly bits from a shop in Salcombe is my favourite ice-cream ever.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:43,
Reply)
Nah, benzos are shitOpiates are the way forward
*hunts for pin*
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:48,
Reply)
To be honest the last thing I need is an opiate.Uppers FTW
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girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:49,
Reply)
Nah.... downers FTWuppers just make me twitchy and paranoid (except for Es, but I can't remember the last time good pills were about)
I'm reformed anyway. This is all hypothetical (not hypodermical)
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:51,
Reply)
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