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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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About time for a new threadWhat's the week got in store for you? Anything fun or horribly terrible?
And since that question wasn't good enough, tell me about the last thing you bought
Alt: so which day of the week were you born on? Do you fit the rhyme?
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:50,
93 replies,
latest was 15 years ago)
I was born on a Friday.Apparently Friday's child is loving and giving.... I suppose I fit it. To an extent.
I'm just studying like a mad thing. I have exams starting 1 month from now. :(
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
I was born on the 31st MayI didn't know there was a rhyme. I expect it's something about hay, or away tum tee tum, or something.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:53,
Reply)
Turns out Darth was born on a Sunday...Monday's child is fair of face,
Tuesday's child is full of grace,
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go,
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for a living,
But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day
Is bonny and blithe and good and gay
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:58,
Reply)
Oh.Well I'm fucked if I know what day of the week I was born on, it was 30 years ago and I wasn't in a position to see a calendar.
Judging by that rhyme though, it was probably a Wednesday. That appears to be the default day for a miserable, cynical cunt.
Edit: Definitely not a Saturday.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:00,
Reply)
Use your windows calendar, I just did.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:00,
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Woop!*miserable cunt high fives*
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:00,
Reply)
Everyone will be SHOCKEDto find out I was born on a Wednesday
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:04,
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Revision and subsequent procrastination.Monday's child is fair of face. Or red and spotty. I'm not answering that one.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
for years i believed i was born on a thursday"far to go" is clearly the best of them all.
then i found out recently i was born on a friday. "loving and giving". no wonder i'm such a sappy soft touch. stupid fridays.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:55,
Reply)
Nothing any good I thinkapart from taking my new dog out for a walk lots.
I was born on Wednesday but I can't remember what the rhyme is for that one
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:55,
Reply)
sorry dudewednesday's child is full of woe
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:56,
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I have been on holiday for 17 daysI do not want to be at work today, or indeed the rest of the week, but sadly it's the only thing I have planned. Although I'm seeing a friend for dinner tomorrow I guess, and next week I'm going to see Avenue Q.
Friday, which I believe makes me loving and giving. Erm. That probably fits me better than any of the others...
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:56, Reply)
I was born on a Monday.And whilst I can't remember the rhyme; I'd like to think it was a perfect fit for me.
'Monday's child is a miserable cunt with a fondness for shit jokes'
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:56,
Reply)
Monday's child is full of revision and subsequent procrastination.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:58,
Reply)
Monday's child is Uh! A cow?I appear to have been born on the wrong day
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:00,
Reply)
Same as Poppet, born on a FridayLoving and giving, me? Ha.
Got the missus round tonight, introducing her to the joys of football, whether she likes it or not. Cinema wednesday, and a party Saturday. Zero other plans though.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:56,
Reply)
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:05,
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What's tuesday?I'm a tuesday person fact fans
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:58,
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It turns out I'm actually Monday fact fans(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:00,
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Oh god I'll never leave the house again :((((
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:01,
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There are way too many variations of the rhyme.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:03,
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Okay.There are
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:10,
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My mother always told me I was born on a Wednesdayand Wednesdays child is full of woe.
Turns out shes retarded and I was born on a Tuesday. Full of Grace? Yup!
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Peej, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:59,
Reply)
I've got my annual review on Wednesday.I am expected to produce a list of things that would help the company and myself to improve over the next year.
I was thinking of asking for a spell check on B3ta, so I could post quicker.
Edit: I was born on a Tuesday, I have no grace.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 9 May 2011, 11:59,
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"Bonny and blithe, and good and gay"Well, I'm blithe. That's about it. As for the week ahead, I intend to spend it liberally coated in olive-oil, slithering around the kitchen floor pretending to be a snake ...Hssss! I work at home, you see.
* I was gay once but I didn't really rate it.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:01, Reply)
YOU'RE BACK !!!!!!!!Send your wife my regards
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:03,
Reply)
Oh, good heavens.I thought my missus had been lost in the mists of time. I've been lying low in shame.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:05, Reply)
Musk risesHe has to walk around on his knees in order to breathe freely.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:10,
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Musk is all pervasive, unlike house-fire smoke.AND MY THIGHS ARE NOT SHORT!!!!! I've actually got a ruler here and from belt to knee they're roughly 40cm!!!
* That's conservative!
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:13, Reply)
It is when you've got it on the end of your noseI suggest you wash.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:17,
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Washing is for the weak.Plus I'm soon to board a train to London. My pungency plus Tennants Super can cunningly filled with water may dissuade joe public from taking the seat next to me.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:23, Reply)
Thank you.And of course maintaining an angry, rambling monologue helps, too + is v. cathartic anyway.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:29, Reply)
Monday's child is red and spotty,
Tuesday's child won't use the potty.
Wednesday's child won't go to bed,
Thursday's child will not be fed.
Friday's child breaks all his toys,
Saturday's child makes an awful noise.
And the child that's born on the seventh day
Is a pain in the neck like the rest, OK!
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:02, Reply)
Monday's child is fair of face,
Tuesday's child is full of grace,
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go,
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for a living,
But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day
Is bonny and blithe and good and gay.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:04,
Reply)
I think someone should have a go at updating it further.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:08,
Reply)
I did once chew through the cable on the back of our Sega Master System, so I suppose that counts as breaking toys...EDIT: Is won't?
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:05,
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I think it needs updatingMondays child is a fucking twat
Tuesdays child is massively fat
Wednesdays child is a miserable cunt
Thursdays child is an ugly munt
Fridays child fucked his sister
Saturdays child is a rectum fister
but the child that's born on the sabbath day
is a bastard, paedo, rapist, OK?
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Peej, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:08,
Reply)
I'm not bonny, blithe, good, or gay.So no.
Q: I will be answering questions that were asked 2 threads ago.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:07,
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I'm a spackeryou know this.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:16,
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'Monday's child is fair of face'I was born on a monday and I look like my head was on fire and they put my face out with a hammer.
So that's THAT theory fucked!
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:13, Reply)
Maybe they mean 'fair on the other children, so they won't be bullied until after this fire headed, hammer faced freak is dead?'(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:24,
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I was born on a Sunday myselfso the rhyme is entirely wrong.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:17,
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Why are we all born on Sundays?(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:18,
Reply)
I'm going for the answerbecause it's the best day
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:21,
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There's a lot of us Friday's Children toobut apparently we're pushovers.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 May 2011, 13:05,
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Sorry AA, I'm a SaturdayWhich means the original rhyme is fucking bollocks.
Edit: but the other two above are spot on. And usually simultaneous.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:21, Reply)
Damn, thought that was a bit too easy to be true.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:25,
Reply)
Thank youIt has no basis whatsoever in truth, given my shockingly paltry magic number, and yet everyone will believe it. I am perceived as a man-slag without the fun of the slaggery.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:43, Reply)
So that plate I stood on a couple of weeks ago... I think part of it might be in my foot. Teaching today for the first time in ages and have worn grown uP shoes and I can hardly walk now. I can feel sOmething moving in there!
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:22,
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Haha yeah, it's really sore. I look like a spastic limping around school. Must be a piece still in there.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:29,
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That thing moving inside your shoe is probably your foot Bob.Unless you've a touch of the Heather Mills about you, and you've not previously mentioned it.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:25,
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I always hated that money grabbing bitch, especially when you hear about all the amazing gifts she was bought by McCartney.I mean, he bought her a PLANE, for fucks sake!
...and some Immac for the other leg
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:26,
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All good thanks dude, bar the football, wenger should go. (
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:30,
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Wenger should be made to buy certain players OR goThere's nowt wrong with your team that a decent centre-back and a midfield enforcer couldn't cure
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:32, Reply)
GivenSamba
Cahill
Barton
Striker - not sure whom
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:36,
Reply)
Barton?Are you mad? He is a fucking nutcase
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:38,
Reply)
He only wants Barton because Deacon is dead.Joeylols.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:41,
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Samba will be looking for new employment when Blackburn go down so that's a good shoutThere's no way Wenger will buy a player with Barton's history. Scott Parker will need a Premiership club to play for soon too, and already lives in London.
You don't need a new striker, you need a new physio/miracle worker for RVP. And someone to tell Arshavin to shape up or fuck off.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:42, Reply)
A halfway decent keeper wouldn't hurt(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:37,
Reply)
Szchesny, or whatever the fuck his name is, has it in him to be a very decent keeperGiven as a temporary measure would be a good plan though
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:39, Reply)
I've never found a child under six months capable of giving good head(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:34, Reply)
Their mouths are too small and lack strong enough suction(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:34,
Reply)
Right, let's clear this upWhy are you posting twice, you attention-seeking mong?
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:45, Reply)
I can confirm that professor nakedape is the same chap who gazzed me a couple of weeks backand is therefore (hopefully) the same popular board-dominating Monty abuse-magnet we all know and love, some of us twice a night.
Dunno who's nicked his original nick (seewhatIdidthere) though, but as Applebite says, it's not Al
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:55, Reply)
Sorry, I meant that to be a more widespread communicationRather than telling you "Well done, you're you"
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
So are you the victim of child sex abuse?I'm lost here.
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:57,
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No but my namesake is, he likes to hide his identity though(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:59,
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I think you may be closer to the truth than you imagineThe other one is clearly Bert
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 13:00, Reply)
Bert only has limited time before being gaybanned so he'll always go after Monty/observation
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 9 May 2011, 13:02,
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Chin up. I'm sure you'll findthe right infant. Maybe if Julia Roberts has a kid. That woman's mouth is slice-of-watermelon big.
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:37, Reply)
Probably Friday's childloving and giving, but that's not who you want. You want the one with the musky arse
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:28,
Reply)
I'd prefer my young felatrix to be full of woe otherwise what's the point? So, I'll opt for Wednesday.
I don't think kids have musky arses do they? Not sure. I'll ask google. Then delete my browser history...
(, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:35, Reply)
Pro tipDon't do this if you're at work. Sure it seems funny, but the next thing you know there's tears, recriminations, you're on the sex offender's register and the Daily Mail's demanding to have the right to tell the country your name and address.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:37,
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Not even a kid it would seem(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:43,
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I'm TuesdayAnd yes, I am full of grace.
Not graceful but full of grace. www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/grace
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:27,
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*some long winded and ultimately unfunny joke about Grace Jones having a penis*(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:29,
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I've now got that as an earworm :)Did have to google it though to find why...I remember the song well but had no idea it was Grace.
Ah, one hit wonders, the best of all the wonders. Apart from Golden Wonder, obviously.
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:50,
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Or the Seven AncientI've heard good things about them, too.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:51,
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I think Gonz would vote for Wall(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:55,
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Work, work and more work...I was born on Tuesday, what's that mean?
EDIT: Thanks CL; no I don't fit the rhyme
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:28,
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Friday's child likes "gimme all your lovin"(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:31,
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DOnt know and can't be arsed to check (
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:37,
Reply)
Don't know what day I was born on but I was delivered by nuns if that's any help.(
girlinthehole, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:38,
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I think this is where my hatred of religion stems from.I never wanted to be born.
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girlinthehole, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:40,
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I was virtually brought up by nunsrather like being raised by wolves, but with habits and more whiskers.
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:42,
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I never wanted to be born either.Stayed in as long as possible, refused to breathe after coming out and screwed myself into a ball for weeks afterwards.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:51,
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I have just received some mail with "Firesheep Fears"on the envelope. I wasn't scared of burning sheep before, but I am now
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:50,
Reply)
I want to go and kill myself.shitmystudentswrite.tumblr.com/post/4933133064/never-forget
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:51,
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Stuff like this just serves to remind me that I'm better than most people.Far from wanting me to kill myself out of despair for my fellow man, it makes me realise that I must live, at all costs. The knowledge of the human race must not be left in the guardianship of these Neanderthals, Lampito.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:53,
Reply)
I'm no use to anyone.I may know lots of words for "dick" but I don't even think I can change a lightbulb.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:54,
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Another one that reminds me of Montyshitmystudentswrite.tumblr.com/post/4064491147/just-when-you-thought-you-were-among-friends
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:55,
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I just ate a chicken sandwichThe chicken was from last weeks Sunday roast, my tummy now feels a bit funny.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:55,
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Good planAre you wanting to lose half your body weight in 12 hours?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:56,
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We'll have to wait and seeIf I start projectile vomiting this be the first internet forum I update.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:58,
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Enjoy evacuating from both ends for the next 48 hours.I hear it's how the top models do it.
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Kroney, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:58,
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I figured the chilli hummus will kill anything that had grown(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 9 May 2011, 12:58,
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Chilli hummus sounds niceI bought a jar of extra spicy Piccalilli at the weekend called Chillililli
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Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Mon 9 May 2011, 13:01,
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picantemole from Sainsburys is nice(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 9 May 2011, 13:43,
Reply)
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