Lets have a lunchtime thread with no talk of food.
Do you spend your lunch hour (if indeed you get an hour) at your desk (if indeed you work at a desk) or do you go for a healthy jog or something.

Alt: at what point does impatience become an intolerance of other human beings?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:33, 132 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

when you beat them with a stick for walking too slowly and not getting out of the flipping way?

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:34, Reply)

That is entirely justifiable.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:35, Reply)

I wish I were allowed to carry a stick in my bag to do that.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:39, Reply)

Pretend you're blind

(PsychoChomp, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:46, Reply)

Excellent plan
Smash some knees in Poppet
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:48, Reply)

I'm all for it.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:07, Reply)

I get half an hour I eat at my desk most days.
Sometimes I go to the local cafe, sometimes I go to the co-op. Today isn't one of those days.
There's a empty water jug on my desk. I think it symbolises this thread.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:34, Reply)

I usually nip into town for a wander and some fresh air.
Alt: At the point where I wake up in a morning.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Yeah, I think that's where I turn into a Montyesque parady of humankind.
The first time each day I see another person, and realise what a bunch of annoying cunts they are.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:38, Reply)

*Waves*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:39, Reply)

eat at my desk
then either play internet games or read my book.

If I'm in my office I chat with the mrs on facebook
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Championship Manager 2011 is available for the iPhone.
This is both excellent and bad (in that I will keep playing it)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:38, Reply)

I have neither a smart phone
nor any interest at all in football
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:39, Reply)

Minecraft is coming out on some phones...
I shouldn't get it.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:44, Reply)

I'm off to the bank to pay in a cheque
then to the market to get some corriander and finally the horror that is Primark to get some t-shirts for Cow Jr

Alt:
0.2 seconds
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:37, Reply)

I am also headed to Primark, to get nighties for the misses to give birth in
Any tips on getting out alive?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:38, Reply)

Go in low, fast and hard
and do the same in Primark
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:39, Reply)

A good midwife.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:39, Reply)

If you're trying to earn brownie points
get the nicest ones you can find.

Also: avoid eye contact with anyone, keep your elbows right out, and try not to dance to any music you may hear while you're in there.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:40, Reply)

Sensible answer is to go at 9am
There are 200 staff and 2 customers
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:41, Reply)

Sensible answer is to not go at all.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:41, Reply)

It'll take more than thin cotton nighties
stitched together by small children to win this one, this is just some admin that needs doing.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:44, Reply)

she really won't give a shit what she's wearing
so I wouldn't waste money on nice things if she's giving birth in them, just send her in an old t-shirt and buy something comfortable for the rest of the stay and for when she gets home
something light and with buttons probably

and to get out alive just act like you know what exactly what you're looking for
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Primark is a cheapo clothing retailer.
Any cheaper and he'll be stealing them.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:19, Reply)

I had a dream with you in last night

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:23, Reply)

Yay! I'm popular.

( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:24, Reply)

I came to visit and had lunch at a fancy restaurant and you invited a load of snooty women and some stole my lunch money
which was in your cash, while the rest of my money was in my cash
it was odd but I got mad and decided I wouldn't go anywhere else so I went back to my hotel to play Donkey Kong 3.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:27, Reply)

*consults Freud*
I think this means you want to sleep with your father.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:04, Reply)

*consults herself*
You're wrong.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:07, Reply)

Here's something lolwacky
In america, they call TK Maxx TJ Maxx. How wrong is that?????
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:24, Reply)

About as wrong as the UK calling TJ Maxx TKMaxx I reckon.

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:26, Reply)

i no rite????
Talk about your two nations divided by a common language...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:29, Reply)

I don't care though because TJ Maxx is shit.
It's basically a thrift store with expensive clothing.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Order online

( Kroney, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:45, Reply)

Desk, gym or town depending on work load, personal admin load and whether I've made lunch
IT'S A TRUE STORY

Alt: When there is more than one or two of them involved.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:37, Reply)

My impatience with became an intolerance of human beings
a long, long time ago.

It's about the point when you stop assuming people are nice until proven otherwise and start assuming they're idiots/cunts until proven otherwise.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:37, Reply)

Lunch is for losers

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:49, Reply)

You've also stated breakfast is for losers.
How do you feel about dinner?
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:52, Reply)

Meh

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:10, Reply)

You are Gordon Gekko AICMFP
Which I'm sure you can spare
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:05, Reply)

It's better off in my pocket than it is yours

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:11, Reply)

True
I'll only spend it on sequins
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Alt: when you genuinely want to push old ladies over
for crowding round the baggage carousel and being bloody nusiances
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:51, Reply)

Again
completely justifiable.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:51, Reply)

We've got a breakroom with tables and chairs and a little kitchen area
so I usually eat there and then come back to my desk to piss about on the internet for the remaining 15 minutes of my 30 minute lunch. Although in practice this is usually the remaining hour of my hour and 15 minute lunch. I realise I spend most of the day on here, lunchtime is for websites with pictures...

There's a couple of people who go for a walk at lunchtime, I feel this would dangerously cut into my pissing about on the internet time.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 12:57, Reply)

I tend to eat my lunch, then depending on whether there's anything worth reading/anyone worth talking to in the brew room, I either stay in there, or come back to my desk
Today there is no-one, so now I've dealt with the bank (and had an apology, woo!) I'm back at my desk.

Alt: Depends what the impatience is over. Someone dawdling down the middle of a supermarket aisle so you can't pass is deserving of death. However, seeing people getting impatient and kicking off at till staff, etc are all pricks.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:03, Reply)

Today
I spent my lunch hour going to work. Normally I eat on my desk, reading the newspaper, so that I can go home earlier, but I'm considering joining a gym near work and go for Yoga at lunch time. Why are gyms so expensive down here?

Alt: too deep question for me this morning. I'm not sure. I'm quite impatient but prety tolerant, so I'm not sure.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:06, Reply)

BGB wants me to be her plus 1 for this secret b4sh, that's ok by you?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:12, Reply)

She knows that I only attract top quality totty.

( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Oh dear b4sh banned by gaz :(((

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:25, Reply)

Hahahaha I bet you're suicidal

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:25, Reply)

I'm having a hard time of it on b3ta at the moment
All I seem to attract is bullying and rejection :(
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I can't imagine why...

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:32, Reply)

THAT@S MY THINKING
Alright treacle, how are you? Apart from the washing line nightmare, I was going to suggest that you clear the dog shit out of the garden every once in a while, but got distracted. Putting up a washing line is the stuff of morons, so surely you can give it a go?

Hope this helps xxx
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:35, Reply)

Oh man, Rory
I wish I gave a shit what you thought. Yeah, that would be totally AWESOME!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:48, Reply)

Hello b3th, how is your husband's heart condition?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:03, Reply)

Hi Gonz
No change, I'm afraid. Still hanging in there...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:05, Reply)

That's a shame, show him some ankle, should you be so daring, that'll get the resting heart rate up.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:07, Reply)

I'm quite poorly today, thrown up a few times, but I have SUPERDOOPER INFLIXNAB ____DOUBLE DOSE___ tomoroow, been waiting for it since around december.
So if you want to roll play some hawt NHS action, I can pretty much at the moment to evacuate any and all orathasis at once at any point in time, except perhaps my ears. Fancy sharing some alchole rubs?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:06, Reply)

OH WOE IS ME !!!!
Christ, when you can't get some sympathy on /OT then you _know_ is Dire Times.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:17, Reply)

people are still trying to figure out if orathasis means orifices.
I got loads of beef the other day. I'm going to be making pies and stews and all sorts.

I also have a brisket and am led to believe by American sit-coms that Jewish people are best at cooking brisket and therefore you must have a recipe.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:24, Reply)

Yup, that's the one.
You want to be making some Salt Beef for sandwiches, I can't give you a recipy I'm afraid (try and find 'evelyn rose' recipie), but I can tell you to look in the jewish section of your supermarket for Chrain (sometimes known as 'beatroot and horseraddish condiment'), Mrs Elswood Sweet And Sour Cucumbers, and ___real__ bagels.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:31, Reply)

and potato ludkas.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:33, Reply)

mmm, salt beef
now that's a fucking good idea.

I was thinking of doing it as a sort of pot roast or something.

I'm not sure any of the supermarkets around here have a jewish section. Devon isn't very ethnically or culturally diverse.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:40, Reply)

I know the only Iranian in Devon, fact

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:41, Reply)

doesn't surprise me
there are a lot of Poles, and Asian students, but not a good mix otherwise.

This has a massively detrimental affect on the cuisine.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:42, Reply)

If you have any greek/turkish Delis, they'll have it in too =)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 15:08, Reply)

I need to check out if there are any of those around
because I fucking love Turkish food.

hmm, apparently there is a Greek restaurant really close to my house.

edit: actually the first website I saw it on had the location totally wrong. stupid fools
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 15:11, Reply)

One day Rory!

( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:26, Reply)

Sorry, I was called by my boss I couldn't answer before
What was that about? Is Rory coming on Sat? I don't mind if you think he's nice, but when he talks with me he's usually a bit rude.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:36, Reply)

Don't worry petal.
He turns up here pretending he wants to come to bashes and then pretends I've gazzed him a message that he can't come.


It's his little joke.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:42, Reply)

I see
It's just him being as nice as always...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:45, Reply)

I think he's misunderstood.
I find him very entertaining.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:26, Reply)

I'll probably go down the rec room and do my Hanjie for the sake of a distraction
Alt: if this relates to your computers for the dumb course, you already have vastly more tolerance than me just by walking into the room
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:11, Reply)

You do your what?
Handjobs?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Hanjie - it's a Japanese number-based puzzle
You sicken me
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Oh I see
Easy mistake to make.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:24, Reply)

Having looked into it, it appears to be the same as Picross
which I have been playing almost constantly on the DS this week.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:21, Reply)

I've not heard of Picross
but B3th is invariably right. About everything. Ever.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:26, Reply)

You're not wrong
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Picross_DS
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:28, Reply)

I take about 45 mins for lunch
I just eat at my desk, read the paper, etc. One day a week we take a long lunch and go and play five a side footie.

I get particularly intolerant when I'm driving. Basically if everyone just got the fuck out of my way I'd get where I want to be a hell of a lot faster.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:11, Reply)

I had been spending my lunch hour at my parents having lunch with my dad, but that means I don't take my dog out at lunch
so she's been extra hyper lately, I'm going to get back into the routine of taking her for a walk at lunch time.

alt: when you realise humans are shit and dull.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:13, Reply)

How was the swim

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:15, Reply)

AWESOME
ta
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:16, Reply)

I've never taken an hour for lunch in my working life.
Alt: It's not even impatience: that would imply that I expect people to stop being cretinous at some point. It's more resigned exasperation at the rank stupidity of the entire human race. Bar about ten fucking people. Four of whom I don't even know. I'm guessing.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:24, Reply)

Is one of the four that Greek lass whose back doors you'd like to smash in?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:25, Reply)

All four of them are her, just in different outfits.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:26, Reply)

I see
Hitler, Mussolini, Franco and Stalin?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:28, Reply)

And, for my birthday, 'Klansman', with exotic lingerie beneath.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:30, Reply)

To quote Hedley Lamarr from Blazing Saddles
Kinky.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:31, Reply)

Oh man I LOVE quoting from films.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:31, Reply)

I know
We're both really into films.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:33, Reply)

If you were really 'into film'
you wouldn't have put an 's' on the end, you faux-bohemian (or 'fobo').
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:50, Reply)

Damn
I've been rumbled.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:53, Reply)

He loves a woman with a moustache

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Hence the Greek bird.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:30, Reply)

It's me isn't it? I am number 4

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:27, Reply)

Yes, that's right.
*pats head*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:28, Reply)

I AM NOT A NUMBER!!!!!!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I AM A FREE MAN!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:34, Reply)

Oh man this is a quote, right?!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:04, Reply)

Yes, you're totally unique
just like everyone else.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:35, Reply)

Trying to work my way through a supermarket is simultaneously
the most depressing and frustrating thing I ever have to experience. People turn into blinkered sheep the minute there's a crowd. There's a sense of assumed anonymity, I guess.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:35, Reply)

Until I lean right over them.

( Kroney, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:37, Reply)

I bet you're often to be found at the fish counter
perusing the brown trout.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:45, Reply)

*click*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:06, Reply)

More likely to be in the frozen section, surely?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:12, Reply)

Well personally I'd always go with fresh over frozen
but each to his own I guess.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:18, Reply)

Brighten up your supermarket visits
If you're a 'tit' man, then start your shop on the booze aisle and work your way back to the fruit and veg. If you're an 'arse' fan, then take the more traditional route.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:42, Reply)

hahahaha!

( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:50, Reply)

*Waves*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:52, Reply)

*waves*
Alright Jeff?
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:03, Reply)

I'm good thanks Blousie.
Is it your special day tomorrow?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:04, Reply)

It is.
I'll be even more too old for you Jeff.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:05, Reply)

*there there*
Hey, at least I remembered before your big-day that tomorrow is your big day!

*BEAMS*

I hope you get lots of nice pressies.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:08, Reply)

I'm not getting anything much.
My dad is paying for a new fireplace for me through the business so it would be greedy of me to ask for something for my birthday.

Edit: and thanks for remembering. You did better than my mum and she's known me for longer.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:09, Reply)

So you aren't expecting much else bar the fireplace.
At least you don't have grate expectations.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:13, Reply)

LTINBIPYFI

( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:16, Reply)

I'm familiar with LTI
But what about the rest of the letter. What are you trying to say?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Leave the internet before I punch you in the face.

( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:19, Reply)

Leave the internet before I punch your face in, surely?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:20, Reply)

My guess was
Leave The Internet Now Before I Pummel Your Fizzog Indiscriminately
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:21, Reply)

Whatever it means. I don't like it.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:30, Reply)

Sounds like Swiss Tony
"A supermarket visit is a lot like making love to a beautiful woman; you're lured in by pleasant smells and attractive displays and by the end you're alternating between rage and despair and clutching a bottle of vodka."

EDIT: and out a load of money.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 13:54, Reply)

I am the closest I've been in a long time to actually flipping out today.
I've had to walk away from my boss's wife to prevent myself from belting the vacuous mutton bitch in the fucking gob.

So there.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:06, Reply)

Breathe in white light and breathe out black smoke.
Hope this helps.
( girlinthehole, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:07, Reply)

What did she do?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:09, Reply)

Hummed a couple of notes from Life on Mars

(PsychoChomp, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:12, Reply)

Haha!
Ground Control to Major Mont
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:13, Reply)

Boyce Keep Swinging

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:21, Reply)

Diamont Dogs

( Kroney, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:22, Reply)

Monty, they got Yop back in OneStop in Cockfosters today, 79p.
Just so you know, nad it's the 500g bottles.

WAIT A SEC, YOP IS OFFICIALLY NOT A DRINK, ITS MESSURED IN 'g' RATHER THAN 'ml'.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 13 Jun 2011, 14:25, Reply)