double dipping is NEVER ok
not even if you've just had sex 3 times and swallowed twice, it is still not ok for them to bite their haloumi spring roll and dip the motherfucking bitten end in your herby yoghurt. are you reading this, mr-rachelswipe? no? probably a fucking good thing that he has no idea about this place, actually.

even if you've just been eating it by yourself, putting dipped-in stuff back in the fridge is not really ok, it always looks gross and offputting the second time around. and given that houmous is only about £2 a pot, just eat it all the first time around and buy another...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:00, 7 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

*posts on facebook*

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

You're a giant collection of neuroses
It's amusing to watch from across the road, but when your sanity does finally let go, I wouldn't want to be in the same county.
( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

most of it is a joke
but this is actually a big issue for me. i don't tell him that though. i just politely use my knife to take the bits of dip that haven't been touched and he is oblivious.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:04, Reply)

JUST FUCKING TELL HIM!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

at some point i might
but the way i look at it is this: after the first couple of minutes, it stops me eating the fattening food. this can only be a Good Thing.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

"most"

( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

*He* swallowed twice?

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

it was hypothetical!
honestly, you lot..... as if i'd have sex before marriage....
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

HAHAHA!
Double dip-tastic
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

She's like a broken fire hydrant

( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

Broken washing machine.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

Also
I'd be prepared to state that if he want to dip his "cheesy spring roll" into his "herby yoghurt" that's entirely his own business, surely? Although it does merely re-confirm his bottery.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:04, Reply)

no no no
it was HIS spring roll and MY yoghurt.

my god, what sort of sick filth do you lot get up to in scotland?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:05, Reply)

I'm not the one dipping "spring rolls" in "yoghurt"

Edit - they'd have no place up here, neither are battered.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

this is making me hungry now
the halomi spring rolls were delicious
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

OMG!
Have you had sex with a boy! OMG REALLY! An actual boy! You put a boys Willy in your FooFoo!? OMG! And you sucked it!? OMG! That's the coolest thing I've ever read on the internet EVER!
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

just because you're married
and such things are but a bi-annual dream...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

obvious strikethrough is obvious

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:05, Reply)

Hahaha

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:11, Reply)

I don't want to blow your mind
but as the last thread revealed, there are whole sites of this stuff now
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:04, Reply)

Well that's just unbelievable.
Who on earth would want to see other people having sex?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

I don't know Al, I just don't know
Who on earth would want to HAVE sex for that matter?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

Certainly everyone on the internet
though they would have to be shown what it was first.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:11, Reply)

people who haven't given up on it entirely?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

Shh you
It's a valid life choice I tell you /sobs
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:11, Reply)

ha, you're 22
you have years and years of great sex ahead of you.

just avoid the cyclists (it makes them impotent)...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Where do you go to talk about it though?
I had sex 3 times this weekend, and I feel that I need to tell the world.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:11, Reply)

I hear www.b3ta.com is good
but you might have to draw a diagram of what it is first
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:12, Reply)

With a man or a woman?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:13, Reply)

Both

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

GET IN!
Congrats.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

I'm not proud of myself, Al.
I mean, I only fucked her so she'd shut the hell up and go to sleep.
Now I understand how a man feels. *shutters*
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Nah, we only do it so WE can shut up and go to sleep.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:20, Reply)

I know a lad who fell asleep mid-coitus
which is the pinnacle of sexual achievement. The girl was not amused. She was even less amused at how funny we all found it.
( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:24, Reply)

that was her first mistake

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:25, Reply)

were you in the room at the time?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:26, Reply)

Actually yes. I was trying to sleep on the other side of the dining table.
There really isn't any polite way of getting up and leaving when somebody's shagging ten foot away. After he fell asleep though, it seemed like the worst had already happened.
( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:29, Reply)

serves her right for shagging in front of other people

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:30, Reply)

Wasn't the first or the last time.
You get used to it.
( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:31, Reply)

yeah
if you're a dirty voyeur.

urgh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:41, Reply)

Just because your neuroses
mean that you have to have sex with the lights out and sheets wrapped around both you and him and a blindfold for him in case your sheet slips.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:44, Reply)

I just think people enjoy rubbing my face in them getting action whilst I'm not.
I don't enjoy people boning in front of me, but I'm not particularly fussed about it, either.
( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:45, Reply)

Some people have no shame, swipe.
They couldn't care less if someone else is in the room, and sometimes it's easier to just lay there and try to fall asleep.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:48, Reply)

I've found myself in this position several times.
The problem is that 3 times have been in the same house, in the same fucking room! (friends house, not mine)
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:45, Reply)

was his name piston?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:26, Reply)

Piston would have fucked her through the floorboards and into the basement.
His username came after that accident in which he bent his nob.
( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:49, Reply)

My brother spent a few weeks convincing his extremely self concious girlfriend to give him a blowjob
After a drunken night, she agrees. He lies back, she gets down to it, he falls asleep.

Took him another 3 months to convince her to do it again. Same situation, both drunk, she gets down to it, he falls asleep again. How she didn't dump him is still beyond both of us.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:27, Reply)

lol good skills

( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:30, Reply)

Hers must have been fucking dreadful
for him to all asleep.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:31, Reply)

He's said it wasn't that
And I quote 'Let's face it, I was pissed, comfortable, and getting something I enjoyed. Why wouldn't I fall asleep?'
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:32, Reply)

Better than the old teeth-dragging horror, I guess.

( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:33, Reply)

hahahaha
still, she sounds up tight
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:36, Reply)

lucky you
i only got it once on saturday (he was very hungover, which i feel is a poor excuse).
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

man up
and grow resistance to the germs
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

^this, too

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:05, Reply)

I'm glad "double-dipping" sounds nothing at all like a dubious sexual metaphor

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:04, Reply)

It's alright for you, you only have to deal with one hole 'down there' on your partners
What about the rest of us, WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH TWO! How do you think that makes us feel? Double dipping is the only option!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:05, Reply)

*polite applause*
And a click
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

i could go for some 'double dipping' about now

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

*volunteers*
*not actually sure what he's getting himself in for*
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

Just along the "Road to Grimsby"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

Makes a change from going to Dunstable.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

Turn left at Dunstable

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

HAHA mindpiss.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

There's good news and bad
The good: you get to have FULL SEX WITH A WOMAN, and a B3tan at that, unchartered territory for you I believe.

The bad: you have to go to Swansea
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:10, Reply)

I think we've already estrablished that he's already put his penis in this:

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:12, Reply)

I even played ringtoss with the onion rings!
Also, I'd like to point out, there's never been any confirmation from anyone about whatever Bella and I did (or did not) do.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:13, Reply)

Motherfucker please

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

Seriously.
Look back through all posts, there has never been any admittal to anything but a snog, I believe.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

Yeah right, a snog between your rapidly detumescing cock and her tandoori chicken encrusted vadge.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

You just know that afterwards
it'd look like Coronation Chicken
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:18, Reply)

HAHAHAHA!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Fantastic.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:20, Reply)

Oh, megaboke

( Kroney, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:23, Reply)

I <3 u about 25% more now.

( G/PP &#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 16:31, Reply)

Haha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:18, Reply)

I text both of you regularly

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

I meant on here, numbnuts.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:20, Reply)

I know
I'm outing you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:22, Reply)

Thanks for that.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:23, Reply)

There are worse things to accuse a man of

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:26, Reply)

Beak
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1310696
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:27, Reply)

I'm actually feeling quite nauseous at my response there, I do apologise for that.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:28, Reply)

Best use of street slang by a middle class white man EVAH!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

Yeah I was pretty pleased with it
Playa
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:20, Reply)

There's nothing like a bread roll
with squidgy mayonnaise inside
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:13, Reply)

Sounds like a store bought tuna mayonnaise sandwich
Also, they both smell vaguely of fish...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

Are you chatting me up?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:10, Reply)

wel if it's double dipping
I'm going to need you and aa

oh and a donkey and some gladioli
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Bobby forgot the donkey
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1309424

nsfw, depending on your bosses attitude to mspaint
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

Resistance to local tradition is futile

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

So you'll put his dick, where he pisses from in your mouth
but double dipping a spring roll is gross?
( Peej, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 15:58, Reply)