so it turns out I've got chickenpox
apparently I "may or may not have had it as a child". I feel like that was information I could have benefitted from early than this. Thanks parents.

what a bastard eh?

Pros: it will be gone by the wedding
I have another week and half off work because of contagion
it could be something worse

Cons: I only have 3 weeks left before I leave my job and have work that needs doing and handing over
it's horrible

Have you had it?

alt: My parents are coming round this afternoon to see me and inspect my rash. How can I avoid them seeing my tattoo?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:54, 173 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Oh noes
Do you think they might take away your xbox and ground you if they see it?
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:55, Reply)

if I had an xbox they might take it away.
actually, no, but I just don't want to have to talk about it with them
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Seriously, I know what you mean
"Thanks for coming round with soup. Now piss off and leave me to my scratching."
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:00, Reply)

Incidentally
I listed to Thirteenth Step last week.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:04, Reply)

took me a moment to wonder why you'd mentioned that.
isn't it a great album?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:06, Reply)

Yep
I love how much of a tangent they go off on with The Nurse Who Loved Me. Just so effortlessly they create the most beautiful song in the world.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:15, Reply)

it's a cover
original is by a band called Failure, who you will probably like.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:18, Reply)

Wow
Cheers for that. Randomly enough I have one song by Failure already. Their cover of Enjoy The Silence on a Depeche Mode tribute album.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:32, Reply)

I just went off on one
ugliesttattoos.failblog.org/
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:59, Reply)

good grief

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:04, Reply)

cover it and the chickenpox in camomile lotion
NEXT
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:56, Reply)

do you mean calomine lotion?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:57, Reply)

no
i mean camomile lotion. it's much more exclusive and much more effective and terribly expensive......
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:03, Reply)

well covered

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:04, Reply)

I've heard tea tree oil helps with itching and keeps bugs away
you know, in case you have bugs
or live outside
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:06, Reply)

i heard covering your hands in oven gloves and duct tape
like giant mittens can help
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:08, Reply)

i heard bashing your face into a brick wall until unconscious can help

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:11, Reply)

certainly stops you scratching.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:11, Reply)

She should try that when she's too scared of spiders to sleep

(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:16, Reply)

please
i don't want to end up looking like you
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:20, Reply)

I should do the same.

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:20, Reply)

We had it when we were kids.
It itches like a bastard. Try not to scratch or you could scar.

Alt: tell them you'll call childline if they try to make you take your clothes off.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 9:59, Reply)

good thinking!
it's not actually itchy at the moment, which is good.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:04, Reply)

And then you'd have a face like b3th. Eugh.
Also, the reason I can only hear in one ear is because b3th infected me with mumps or something when I was a defenseless kid. Evil woman.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:08, Reply)

were you also an ameriCan kid?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:08, Reply)

Dammit
I'm usually so defencive ;) over my British Cs and Ss e.g. civilisation etc. I used my phone's auto complete however.

*sadfaces*
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:12, Reply)

No
The reason you can only hear on one side is because god hates you, and you're defective. At least you have your eyesight.

EDIT: Also, I had mumps when I was a baby, so your mumps is nothing to do with me. And with any luck, it might have made you sterile.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:11, Reply)

True
Into my 30s and still no glasses required. Muh-hahahaha.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:13, Reply)

Sterile eh?
Here's hoping.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Could you find out about that?
Cheers.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Fucking hell
he's got you doing impressions of Legless too now has he?
(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:52, Reply)

WHUT?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:53, Reply)

He ended a text message to me yesterday with the word "Cheers" too.
I accused him of being Legless.

YEAH THAT'S RIGHT, YOUR MAN WAS TOTALLY TEXTING ME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY! WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT!
(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:57, Reply)

Bitch,
I got no idea whut you talkin bout
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:09, Reply)

I've heard you can get it more than once.
you could always do the work and spray the paperwork down with disinfectant
I had it when I was a kid, don't really remember it, but apparently it's itchy

alt: I don't know, wear a shirt?
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:05, Reply)

so I'm told
stupid chickens and their pox
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:07, Reply)

stop hanging out with chickenlady
sorted
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:10, Reply)

If you're an adult and you've got chicken pox it's going to be brutal. Sorry.
I had it when I was a teenager and that was horrible.

Thank your stars it's not shingles though.

Try not to scratch. Calomine lotion is good but you might need to virtually bathe in it, try and get it on prescription.

And the tattoo? take a nice hot cup of man the fuck up and let them see it, they'll find out sooner or later.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:06, Reply)

brutal in what way?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:06, Reply)

the older you are the worse it is. To extremes.
lasts longer, rash is worse, itches more. Only usually, though. You could be lucky. If all hell hasn't broken loose on your skin within about a week of starting to feel shit then you might have dodged a bullet, chap.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:09, Reply)

well, it started on Saturday
and I am fucking covered in spots, but it's not actually itchy, even the first spots that appeared, so fingers crossed
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:11, Reply)

the spots started on Sat?
CP starts about 3 or 4 days before that, feels a bit like mild flu to start.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:12, Reply)

I think I must have just ignored it.
had a high temperature on sunday, which has gradually come down since then.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:17, Reply)

fair play
fingers crossed for you, sir. And, seriously, if it does get really itchy, gaffer taping soft gloves on is the way forward.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:24, Reply)

cheers

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:26, Reply)

Worst of all
is that now his missus is going to find out he's been fucking chickens.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:14, Reply)

that's just fowl.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:15, Reply)

Leave The Internet.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:16, Reply)

It wasn't that bad Monty
Don't eggsagerate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:18, Reply)

Cluck off.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:20, Reply)

Don't be so cocky

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:22, Reply)

That gag
is a real feather in your cap-on.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:40, Reply)

My missus
Caught it as an adult and it can properly fuck you up, like a very bad flu but with itching etc, she found luke warm baths helped...
Or maybe it was a sexually ambiguous man called Luke who would sort her out while I worked, either way it helped
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:27, Reply)

you meant camomile lotion too, right?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:07, Reply)

It's more expensive and effective
Damn, do these b3tans know nothing?
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:09, Reply)

if you say so.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:10, Reply)

wow
you're mighty accommodating this morning, mighty badger
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:21, Reply)

I know, aren't I just?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:22, Reply)

*unzips*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:24, Reply)

Have you considered showing another part of your body?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:20, Reply)

that would spoil the range of poses that I've got planned

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:20, Reply)

What to do in the South West Example 4:
Pose for you parents.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:23, Reply)

Examples 2: catch VD off a chicken

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:24, Reply)

Woo, new Vans.
Fuck Barry from Eastenders right in the face.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:21, Reply)

I'm not keen on Vans
they are the least comfortable of all the skate shoes apart from Airwalk
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:25, Reply)

I disagree
I really like Vans, and they last a hell of a long time. The pair I'm currently wearing have been in my possession for about 18 months and only just need replacing.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:28, Reply)

I wore my last pair pretty much every work day for the past 18 months and they're just now starting to get tatty
since I started playing football with my mate's dogs. I don't care about comfort really, I'm used to rock-solid-soled walking boots.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:30, Reply)

We were wearing similar Vans to the boxing night
I much prefer DC though. Comfier.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:35, Reply)

My mum said she'd kick me out of the house if I ever got a tattoo.
First thing I did when I turned 18? Went and got a tattoo. Did she kick me out? Did she fuck. Then went and got a half sleeve of skulls and she still didn't kick me out. So by my reconing you're parents aren't really gonna care that you have a tattoo
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:21, Reply)

Plus he's about 25 and doesn't live at home and is about to get married.
Basically he's being a big gay weedy coward.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:23, Reply)

30
it was mainly the first alt I could think of
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:26, Reply)

My parents don't know I've got a tattoo either
It wouldn't do any good whatsoever to tell them and there's very little chance they'll ever see it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:27, Reply)

I think my parents noticed when I came back from a run in a sleeveless vest
the conversation went "is that a tattoo?" "yes, mum" "Oh, OK"

remarkable. I bet you're all on the edge of your seats.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:30, Reply)

*falls off seat*
Nothing to do with you, I'm just a mong
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Cool story bro

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:36, Reply)

this is the problem with telling the truth
it's dull. I should have just HONDA ACCORDED the fuck out of it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:37, Reply)

You should take a leaf out of Noel's book
and make up some ridiculous bullshit about how you always eat fried eggs with chilli flakes.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:44, Reply)

PS aren't all vests by definition sleeveless?
Isn't sleevelessness one of the basic tenets of vestitude?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:37, Reply)

fair point there Monters.
Should have said sleevless T-shirt I suppose. Poor form.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:38, Reply)

I had three sleeveless tops nicked off our washing line on Sunday night
They left the really nice purple shirt I wore on TWL. Tasteless bastards.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Seized by the fashion police.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Are they a subdivision of those Comedy Police wankers you wouldn't shut up about last week?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:48, Reply)

Knock Knock

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:57, Reply)

I'm not sure we can be friends now.
You've ruined everything, and all for a poorly-thought-out throwaway vest quip. Was it really worth it?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Do you know, I'm just not sure?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:46, Reply)

top "fuck you I won't tidy my bedroom" work, right there.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:23, Reply)

WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T SHE HANG OUT MY CLOTHES
SHITTY MUM
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:25, Reply)

I had a late teenage rebellion
So I didn't do anything until she technically couldn't stop me. I drunk underage once. God, I was such a rebel
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:26, Reply)

you did, basically, post that as if your prime reason for getting a tattoo
was to rebel against your mum, but waited until the act of rebellion was meaningless as you were already an adult. That does make you sound like a bit of a tool.

Try getting tattoos when drunk instead, that's a much better approach.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:28, Reply)

the fact that it was an I heart mum tattoo probably helped to smooth things over

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Nah, I love tattoos
I didn't do it to spite my mum. That would be foolish as I have to live with them on my skin for the rest of my life.

Saying that I did let an apprentice mate do one of the ones on my leg for free. So maybe I am a bit of a tool
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:33, Reply)

Was it the Trivium one?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:43, Reply)

Did you get the tattoo as an act of rebellion against your mother?
She probably anticipated that you'd do so, which is why she forbade it. I bet your Mum loves men with tattoos and wanted one around her at all times.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:23, Reply)

She's got a massive tattoo of a gammon on her arse.

Put me right off my stroke.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:25, Reply)

That's not where it would have most ample opportunity for wetness though
Maybe Joey Deacon could get ham tattooed on his chin
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:26, Reply)

She's got a massive "W" tattoo'd on each cheek
so when you pull out of her arse it says "WOW"

/have definitely used this one before here
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:26, Reply)

Are you suggesting that the gateway to Azaroth begins in Wet Ham Man's mum's bum?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:28, Reply)

The dark portal.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:31, Reply)

I'm going to bully you two unless you stop nerding out.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:34, Reply)

HELP I NEED A GAME MASTER!

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:36, Reply)

In my defence
I've never played WoW, I only know it takes place in Azaroth because it was mentioned on The Big Bang Theory last week...

...this isn't any better, is it?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:38, Reply)

No.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Fine, bully me
Do let me know when you've started, or I might not be able to tell, and I wouldn't want your efforts to go unappreciated.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:43, Reply)

I'm doing it now.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:48, Reply)

*cries to Mummy*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:49, Reply)

maybe so, DF. maybe so.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:34, Reply)

That's not going to cut it, TMB.
I need you to investigate.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:35, Reply)

Haha, when you're 60, that's going to look fucking horrible.
Gutted.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:47, Reply)

Alt: show them the rash on your cock

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:22, Reply)

Remind your parents that you are a degree passing, fully employed, about to be married, upstanding member of the community.
And as an adult if you want to get a tattoo, you'll bloody well get one.
( girlinthehole, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:26, Reply)

Then say
'this is my house and I shall behave precisely as I wish'

Then start masturbating.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Actually laughed out loud at that comment Monty XD

(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:29, Reply)

Best Option Right Here.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:31, Reply)

I told my dad the other week that a tattoo was next on my list.
By which, I apparently meant "sacrificing a couple of relatives to Satan".
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:29, Reply)

If they're Paul Gallagher's relatives then I'll pay for it

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:33, Reply)

Is that an awfully clever 'football' remark?
I must not have understood, because I'm a girl.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Paul Gallagher's brothers are called Liam and Noel
They completely destroyed mainstream British music in 1994
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:05, Reply)

Ah, right. I had successfully repressed all memories of them.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:06, Reply)

YOU MUST TEACH ME

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:10, Reply)

I still joyfully recount the story of how
after my sister *ahem* grassed me up to my dad that I smoked skunk at 27 while in Amsterdam, he said "I'm surprised son, I'd have thought you'd had more sense than that."

Didn't have the heart to tell him I'd been doing it for over ten years.
( djtrialprice, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:41, Reply)

Only ten years?
What a fucking swot you must have been at school.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:49, Reply)

I have photos...

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Oooooo!
Gaz them, or post them on facebook where he can't see!
(Bazongaloid, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:58, Reply)

Pack it in you quilt

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Then ask for money.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:29, Reply)

Bigger problem
It's lethal to adults. Nice knowing you.



Or is that measles?

Anyway, I hope you die.
( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:32, Reply)

that's being shot in the face.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:33, Reply)

I'm just after his van. Or his woman.
But I'd prefer his van.
( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:37, Reply)

this thread is so boring I may have to go back to bed

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:35, Reply)

You should vote for Jon Huntsman
his daughters are hot.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:36, Reply)

Obama's daughters might be hot by the end of his term
If he gets four more years
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:37, Reply)

Not this hot
i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/08/07/article-0-0D55E20E00000578-961_468x333.jpg
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:37, Reply)

ha ha, I just google imaged, that's literally the only photo they look good in.
Ignore my advice KK, vote for whoever you want.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:38, Reply)

I would have expected more diligent research from you
Anyway, Bush's daughters were alright looking.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:39, Reply)

hey, guess what, they don't even look good in that photo
unless they're supposed to look like tranny hookers
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:40, Reply)

I like that look.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:42, Reply)

One is really fucking chinny.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:45, Reply)

at least one of those is a total facewrong.
and I see no evidence of breasts. I like breasts.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:39, Reply)

There's breasts on the left
and they are a bit face wrong but a lot of american girls look like that.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:39, Reply)

I meant, as in
they've all got small breasts.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:41, Reply)

I may be mistaken
but wasn't one of Bush's daughters supposed to be a looker?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:57, Reply)

^ NONCE SENSE

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:38, Reply)

They look really American.
It's weird how Americans have a look. They're all mongrels.
( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:39, Reply)

And the contrast in that photo is all fucking wrong.

( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:40, Reply)

It's really over-exposed.

( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Oh hark at Lord fucking Snowdon here.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:46, Reply)

David Bailey, thank you.
Can you not see how beige it all is?

It's fucking offensive.
( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:47, Reply)

yeah, all glamorous and shit
you lot look ironic and dirty
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:43, Reply)

No, I mean like you lot could start up a mining consortium with no equipment other than your chins.

( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Like Reece Witherknife
you could sink ships with that chin
( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:45, Reply)

that's probably the stupidest thing I've ever read

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:45, Reply)

Hang around, sweetheart, I've got better than that.

( Kroney, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:46, Reply)

You should check out the main /qotw

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:47, Reply)

they do my head in
if I wanted to hear people talk about themselves, their problems and try to be funny I'd talk to my "friends"
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:51, Reply)

That's why it's so boring. We know you need your sleep.
You're welcome.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:36, Reply)

pick it up a notch I've had to bully people IRL to get my kicks the last two weeks

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Don't pop the little blisters
It's satisfying, but leaves scars.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:45, Reply)

I don't think I've ever had it, but I have a set of scars that match pox quite closely.
Alt: Answer the door naked, they won't want to look at you.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:51, Reply)

Oh you poor thing.
They won't scar if you don't scratch 'em.

I had them when I was 10. I used to hold the end of my ponytail like a stubby brush and poke the ones in my scalp with it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:52, Reply)

I can't imagine you with a ponytail

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:56, Reply)

I've only had long hair twice.
Once at 10/11 and once at 14/15.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:25, Reply)

I had it twice when I was a kid
Or so the doctors told me, I've been assured plenty of times that you can't get it more than once. Not by doctors, though.

Alt: Easy, move the subject on to the wedding.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:53, Reply)

my mate's kid had it once, then looked like she was getting it again, turned out to be scarlet fever

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Could have been scarlet fever I suppose
Never really known what that involved, it was outside the "big four" of Measles, German Measles, Chicken Pox and Mumps when I was a kid
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:59, Reply)

lol old

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:00, Reply)

I'll be 33 in 9 days :-(
That is OLD
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:03, Reply)

OH MY GOD IS IT YOUR BIRTHDAY SOON?
You should have said!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:05, Reply)

I assumed you'd know
*cries*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:10, Reply)

proper fucking old and everything
I'll be 17 in 2 weeks yay
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:12, Reply)

Maybe the second time was when you caught 'gay'?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:57, Reply)

I seriously doubt that
If catching gay involved a rash I'd have accessorised it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 10:58, Reply)

with.... glitter?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:03, Reply)

Don't be daft, far too busy
Maybe a nice red bracelet or something to tie in into the look
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 24 Aug 2011, 11:04, Reply)