Today is Children In Need Day
What are Children in Need of?

Alt:
What shit "charidee" things are you/your office/friends/family doing or have done in the past?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:01, 96 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Discipline and bounderies.
Alt: Nothing.
( girlinthehole, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:03, Reply)

And spelling lessons.
But you are correct. Although when they clearly understand the boundaries, there isn't much need for discipline.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:06, Reply)

Good points people

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Well as least I got discipline right.

( girlinthehole, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:10, Reply)

As I would expect from a dominatrix.
*cleans BGB's boots with tongue, whilst wearing nappy*
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:13, Reply)

I SAID LICK FASTER !!!!!

( girlinthehole, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:16, Reply)

Yes Mistress. Sorry Mistress.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:17, Reply)

^this
Also, morning.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Morning b3th
How is your man-flu? Are you still chesty?

snigger
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:07, Reply)

JUICY JUGS

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:09, Reply)

Why thanks Rory
I've been working on them for some time now
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:10, Reply)

i am indeed.
Thank you very much for asking. I am now waiting for it to turn into bronchitis, which it has done every time I've had a cold for the last 27 years.

*epic sadface*

Still, mustn't grumble, eh?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:15, Reply)

Oh dear

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

Morning petal.
Any more chipper today?
( girlinthehole, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:10, Reply)

See above.
How about you?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:15, Reply)

I'm ok actually.
I have the dogs in the office which is cheering me up : )
( girlinthehole, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:16, Reply)

They are very good at that.
Just look at their little faces... aww.....
*squees*
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:19, Reply)

I don't think they need any more boundery
They're big enough cads as it is, wot-wot!
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:45, Reply)

Hahaha you are sorely missed on here.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:46, Reply)

Fear not, I shall try to gradually re-integrate myself
Being the only irritable Hawkwind enthusiast on here must be a lonely existence.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:55, Reply)

You've no idea, old bean.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:56, Reply)

Well, the waters seem a little calmer now that somebody's given the delightful Personality Horse a dose of Ketamine
Now who the devil is this Quender Oftiweak upstart? It seems I've some catching up to do.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:58, Reply)

A better "official Children in Need song"
That new version of Teardrop is just horrific. Hey, let's ruin a great tune by talking over it!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Isn't that how to describe every Henry Rollins track?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:19, Reply)

God he really is a penis, that man.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:22, Reply)

I've heard that his spoken word thing is meant to be excellent
But fucking hell, that's no excuse for making music that bad.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:24, Reply)

We might even be able to indirectly blame him for The Streets

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

Weirdly, there are a couple of tracks by The Streets I don't hate.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:27, Reply)

Could be worse.
Could be Jedward.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

I really couldn't choose between the two.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:27, Reply)

I'd do John, but not Edward.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Would you let him watch?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

They need to be seen, not heard.*
Alt: My current company don't do anything, and luckily when I worked at McDonalds, they didn't do anything hugely wacky, just a few more balloons out, etc. I think anyone who tries to guilt trip me into giving money to charity, the same way that those who told me I'm a bad person for shaving during Movember. You don't pay me to look a twat the other 11 months of the year, so why should I give a flying fuck what you think now, you flidmo cunts?

*Anyone pointing out that I am also young, and as such I should be the same, remember, you're seeing me, not hearing me.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Weren't you sporting a cahhhncil estate tashe at the lolb4sh?
Sight of that very picture would silence all critics
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:16, Reply)

I discovered that day the razor had broken, didn't get a chance to run the shop for another.
And hated that fact.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:18, Reply)

This tops 'I fell down the stairs guvnor'

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:20, Reply)

Haha
This is actually true, I seriously hated the fact I was going out looking like that, but due to a mistimed afternoon nap, I was already in a massive hurry, and half an hour late.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:23, Reply)

was it fluffy?
how sweet
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

The only word I would ever use to describe my facial hair is 'pathetic'.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:23, Reply)

ial hair e
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Hahaha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Most brats are in need of a regular slapping.
Charidee: volunteering for Crisis, trustee of another charity and media spokesman for Epilepsy Action.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Sponsored by Aerial Automatic.
/obligatory sock reference
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:17, Reply)

I tried to get a job with Epilepsy Action
"but my face didnt fit"
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 12:15, Reply)

They're in need of the proposed ban on advertising aimed at under 16s.
Bless her heart, my daughter laughs at the ads for plastic shit on TV and cries 'rubbish, Daddy'. Ironically her Kentish family have probably bought it all for her for Christmas.

Alt: I need charity myself, fuck off am I contributing to one.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:15, Reply)

What would be absolutely fantastic
is if she opens all that plastic shit on xmas day when she's with her pikey family, and proclaims it all to be 'fucking shit', and asks for a book or a jigsaw puzzle instead.

Up until the point where they use it to stop you seeing her again, obviously.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:18, Reply)

I'd love to see that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

Proper You've Been Framed moment.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:23, Reply)

SARA
Shoreditch
Antique
Restoration
Association
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:18, Reply)

*shakes walking stick*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:19, Reply)

That'll be Parkinson's, I'm afraid.
Sorry to be the bearer...
As if the ol' codger didn't have enough problems.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

We are doing a 50/50 on cheap plastic shite and good stuff
I have bought a proper old school doll's house and furniture for my daughter. I think she'll love it! To balance this, the boy has a sit-in Lightning McQueen car
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

So, which child do you love the most then?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

The one that buys Daddy his gin

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

lol some muppett tried to do the ammy scam thing on me.
Had him on hold for a while, he's phoned back twice due to a poor line.

Made him run through the scripts a few time. Work for your money.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:19, Reply)

Haha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

My computer has taken 10 mins to "re-start" on this call.
Have fun "Brian"
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:23, Reply)

Best call I ever had was a little fellow in Bangalore who opened with
'HALLO MY NAME IS STEVE DAVIS'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:28, Reply)

Is this the black calling the pot?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

They haven't quite managed to get I'm taking the piss.
aviary.com? What has this got to do with housing birds?

They've not phoned back again :'(
I miss Brian, might do 1471 and see if we can just be friends.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

If you can get to youtube where you are right now
then this is for you
www.youtube.com/watch?v=NS8KDVvMmIg
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Monkey dust for the win!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:48, Reply)

I did this a few weeks back.
Managed to get them to call back several times over the course of a week. Each time I managed to keep them on the line for over half an hour by asking them to wait for a moment, then going and sitting back down for a bit.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

It's a lot of fun.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

a goood discipline bumming
Alt: I have the moustache of a 2nd world war fighter pilot at present
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:19, Reply)

Pic please
so we can laugh
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:23, Reply)

maybe at teh end of the month, once i can wax the tips

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Same here
Mine is coming along nicely. I reckon another few weeks will take me into wing commander territory.
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

roger roger

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:33, Reply)

What if Roger doesn't want to be rogered?
are you inciting institutional homosexual rape?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

What's our vector, Victor?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:41, Reply)

Your moustache is divebombing US aircraft carriers with no intention of survival?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

And how does Mr Bader's estate feel about that?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

Legless
Cheers
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

10/10 excellent

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Fine we went to the same school, so we're practically family

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

He was a reckless idiot who endangered the lives of others with his stupid showing off.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:34, Reply)

maybe so, but he was also pretty hardcore

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Fucking hell
A film I actually want to see.
www.imdb.com/title/tt1235790/
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Is this not just inside your head?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

hard to tell these days

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:27, Reply)

Clever I may be
but I am as yet unable to project my thoughts into the IMDB site for others to read.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

Not now I've wrapped everything safely in tin foil you can't

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:42, Reply)

That would be the IMBB
"Inside Monty Boyce's Brain"
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:42, Reply)

A film you need to see
www.imdb.com/title/tt0064806/
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:27, Reply)

I've heard of that actually. Tres trippy, non?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:29, Reply)

It's very trippy
I thought I dreamt watching it as a child, then it popped on TV a year or so ago. Mental.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:56, Reply)

someone catch me up, dunno whats happenin in this thread
superfly's overstepped the line in that other one
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:36, Reply)

Fuck you with your unfounded accusations.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Have you been naughty again, Al?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

imma link it, wait a sec

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1437963
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Awww man, why are you trying to make me look like the bad guy here
I was totally defending you!
(Bazongaloid, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

its alright, jus drawin attention to it, think i went further than you, people might miss it cos theres too much gwan

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

Are you being naughty Gary?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:43, Reply)

nah it was him, someone said bad things about me so he told her off about her dead mum
too far i reckon
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 18 Nov 2011, 11:44, Reply)