'noon

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 15:51, 107 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

My Saturday afternoon/evening pub session has been curtailed due to snow
Is there any way I can claim compensation for this, d'you think?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)

From who?
I don't think the Frost Giants have a Customer Service line.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:14, Reply)

I'll ring Esther Rancid or that bloke off The Bill on Monday
My dissipation has been severely curtailed.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)

,noon.
I'm watching the rugby. It occurs to me that the Italian team look a lot like Smurfs.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:08, Reply)

I hadn't sat back down from celebrating our goal
before Swansea equalised. Fuck a duck.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)

And now... Ouch

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)

We are shit at home
and great away. Baffling.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 16:41, Reply)

noon
I have a painted lounge and one set of curtains up - DIY win!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:03, Reply)

I'm in the pub
Having watched nine man Bristol City lose 3-0 to Leeds United at a snowy Ashton Gate.

This post was brought to you by the letters;

P.I.S.S.E.D.O.F.F.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:23, Reply)

and cold, I imagine

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:28, Reply)

It wasn't too bad
But then I dressed for the cold, so I expected to be warm. No such thing as bad weather, just inappropriate clothing.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:36, Reply)

Fucking hell last night getting off the train at Lime Street I nearly died of shock
I really wasn't expecting Liverpool to be that cold.
My street is an ice rink and it's still raining.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:39, Reply)

Football is pants I told you to stay at home.
I've already turned our game off.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:53, Reply)

Is it bad, Mr From Eastenders?
Cricket is also grim at the moment. I was thinking of waking up extra early in the morning to watch, but there's a sense of inevitability to it.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:58, Reply)

This can only be bettered if Derby beat Florist tomorrow.
I shall be watching with interest.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:00, Reply)

Night
I've been doing boring stuff, apart from last Monday when I went ski racing. We got humped in the first round and retired to the bar for seven hours.
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 17:37, Reply)

Blimey it's a long time since I made my own tea on a Saturday.
Anyway - on the highest point west of the Urals (everyone on the east side of the UK can claim this distinction too) it's snowing a lot.

A weather event! Gosh.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:28, Reply)

we had snow before it was cool
then it went away.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:32, Reply)

I was being ironic too
I'm glad I left the boozer when I did because I'd not have got a taxi up here (I live at the top of a very steep hill) but it's winter, and snow happens.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:41, Reply)

I have not witnessed today's particular kind of weather before.
First of all I said "Phew, it's raining and not snowing. While it's wet it's not icy."
How wrong I was. Nana's front door is a sheet of ice. My street is a death trap. As it lands, it freezes. Worst of all, you can't see it like you can see snow. it is perfectly clear and polished. What a crock.
Why is it freezing on contact, yet it's still liquid in the air? Why isn't the cunt identifying itself by being snow or hail??
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:37, Reply)

Did you get a cold welcome from Nana?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:41, Reply)

She phones me:
"Girl. Do not go out. If you have to go out put your spikes on. God bless us the front door is a sheet of ice and a man just fell over. I only went to buy the Echo and I felt safe because it was raining, but it's turning to ice. Can you see any wheelie bins where you are? They've got ICICLES on them. Stay at home."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:50, Reply)

Evenin' Dogboy
Best in the world, eh....

I'm taking solace from Rashad's comment - "This isn't real cricket."
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:52, Reply)

What, you mean there's been football, rugby AND cricket drama in one day?
What if you like all three? How do you cope?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:53, Reply)

I don't care about the first two
A man needs to specialise.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:55, Reply)

That's a strange sort of weather
Here in my adopted land its just straightforward ordinary white crap.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:46, Reply)

It's when it melts a bit then re-freezes that i really worry

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:51, Reply)

It's all soft and soggy here
If I was a lot younger and had an audience I'd be rolling about in it. Giggling.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:59, Reply)

I was still making snowmen up until a few years ago
Fuck that freezing shit
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:03, Reply)

Has a state of national emergency been declared yet?

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:58, Reply)

What would Ed Balls do about this?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:01, Reply)

not until it falls on london

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:01, Reply)

3/1 says the snow will cause a total breakdown of law, order and all public services in the grey city.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:05, Reply)

ANARCHY IN THE UK!
Snow - causing chaos!

And it's all down to the ConDems. It never snowed before.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:14, Reply)

I've basicly made my own version of what Rachal Allen did on the telly this morning, the kofta kababs.
Kofta Kababs - Lamb Mince, Croyanda, garlic, chili, tumeric, motza meal (a jewish grain), diced onion, an egg.
Sauce: Roasted oboejeans, yoghurt and tahini, roasted garlic.
Onions: Done on the slicer-grator so they're so thin they're transparent, and soaking in lemon juice. Seriously, I could eat a bowel of this, so nice.

In a pitta bread, with chopped raw chili on top of the the koftas, and some mint salad. And on the side, a fruity cuscus.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:44, Reply)

Sounds fit that Gonz

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 18:51, Reply)

All the individual bits are well lush, when I did the kofta before I fried off a tiny ball to check the seasoning.
With the yoghurty sauce though, I made it before, but it tasted rank, I put in garlic salt instead of garlic and used too much. So I ran out to waitrose to get the ingredients I ran out off and re-made it, and this time I used that "Very lazy garlic" stuff (didn't have any first time 'round), and it's fucking win.

I think this might even be dinner-party worthy of a recipy.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:00, Reply)

Once I've moved house properly
I need to learn to cook - perhaps I'll start with some of your recipes on coll3ctive
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:02, Reply)

Oh ace, just one step at a time, you can very quickly turn it into something you enjoy doing and it no longer looks like a chore.
Creating something out of nothing, instead of thinking focal lengths and appritchures, you think in flavours and textures.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:10, Reply)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 20:34, Reply)

Unless you've got a bird with you
That number of candles is bent.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:34, Reply)

I'd mary the crazy girl on Come Dine With Me in a moment.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:17, Reply)

They're all crazy surely?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:20, Reply)

Nah', this is a special kind of crazy.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:21, Reply)

SARAH?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:26, Reply)

That's the one.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:30, Reply)

Too much, even for me

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:31, Reply)

I reckon it's nerves, that she'd be just right with someone she's comfortable with.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:54, Reply)

How's things doing with Waitrose girl?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:00, Reply)

Souxie and the Banshees?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:31, Reply)

Finally I can watch MOTD tonight.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:32, Reply)

Read this at 22:25 and it reminded me to turn the telly on
Ta.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:34, Reply)

I'm going out for a tab.
Make this engaging now, eh?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 19:39, Reply)

What do you fancy engaging in
And with whom?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 20:24, Reply)

I'm bored now!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 20:39, Reply)

Me too!
What shall we do, eh, Cavy?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 20:50, Reply)

*shrugs*
i'm too tired to do anything constructive, not tir4ed enough to sleep yet
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 20:55, Reply)

Everyone should watch the new Hustle
it's subtle "don't be fat" message is amazing.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 20:57, Reply)

I can't be arsed.
It's probably good, and Sherlock is probably good, but I can't be arsed.
I have been taping New Girl though. Yeah I said 'taping'.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:02, Reply)

How very "retro" of you Roots

(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:06, Reply)

I say video games and all.
I'm a right old git.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:08, Reply)

I bet you call it hippety-hop as well.
I'm out of rizzlas but it's snowing. fml :(
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:11, Reply)

Sly ice is starting to melt here.
I only know from Nana. She's updating regularly.

Hear this, Chomp, for the second time in a few weeks I have pissed off BT and for the second time my phone has developed a fault shortly after. Coincidence? Cunts.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:13, Reply)

heh, I'll brave it in a bit, I have snow boots
I drunkenly emailed Anglian water refusing to pay a bill the other day because they weren't following OFT guidelines. I got a three page response from their law department saying they'll "look into it".

I'd bet it is a coincidence, the engineers will just laugh at your complaints about the company, but if my water gets cut off I'll change my tune.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:17, Reply)

FUCK YES
under bed rizzla action.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:18, Reply)

It's happenng to loads of people Chompy.
They stand to gain £130 if I agree to an engineer visit. Well they can fuck off because whilst I can't receive calls I can make them FOR FREE and I have a mobile if people need to call me. And I'm leaving soon.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:19, Reply)

Is it stopping your broadband?
I barely use the normal phone.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)

Only preventing incoming calls. And only sporadically.
Whilst I have broadband and outgoings I am fine.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:24, Reply)

The Daily Fail publishes yet another hilariously distorted healine...
They've got a good website but some of their reporting is hysterical.
This woman did not say anything that is included in the opening 2 paragraphs.
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2096505/Tory-MP-Anne-Milton-sparks-fury-calling-northerners-hard-drinking-smokers-jump-bed-drop-hat.html
(Glucose-Maximus All over the world., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:07, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyE4CLM0QIA
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:09, Reply)

That Is one of the greatest pop songs of all time.
I have Tango In The Night.
Anyway, is this a reference to the mail?
(Glucose-Maximus All over the world., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:10, Reply)

No, you, ya liar

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:11, Reply)

What are you saying I have lied about?

(Glucose-Maximus All over the world., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:12, Reply)

I told you when you did it.
'younger sister' to 'twin sister' in a nanosecond. Lies.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:14, Reply)

I just forgot they were twins.
Shes slighly smaller than her sister anyway.
(Glucose-Maximus All over the world., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:15, Reply)

Hero

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:17, Reply)

is this a standard sex lies case?

(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:19, Reply)

Yeah
He wanted to fit in with the sex people and tell a sex story, but he forgot he's only meant to be 12 and said his mate got caught in bed with his birds younger sister, then ninja'd it to 'twin sister' when he realised it was evidently either lies or more noncery.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:20, Reply)

Fair enough,
open and shut. I'll be filling the board with them next week, travelodge girl is coming down tomorrow.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:22, Reply)

to yer house?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)

Yep,
*should really tidy up*
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:24, Reply)

What time's she coming?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:25, Reply)

about 4, depending on snow etc.

(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:25, Reply)

Oh you'll have loads of time.
No point changing the bedding til tomorrow as you'll sleep in it tonight anyway, then it's a case of dishes, bog, clean sweep, kitchen floor and Hoover. Plenty of time.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:28, Reply)

Aye, it'll be fine, as long as I don't sleep in.
Which means I should go to bed at a reasonable hour tonight.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:33, Reply)

My eyes are rolling now tbh
Won't be long before nappage
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:36, Reply)

He was caught in her arsehole, not her bed.

(Glucose-Maximus All over the world., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)

Shut up Spartacus

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)

He is the spawn of Satan, do not listen to his lies.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:17, Reply)

Yeah blud

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)

Brap Brap

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:42, Reply)

If that isn't a link to Aqua's 'Turn Back Time', then shit son, you'd better put a book on your behind 'cus i'm gonna be adminstering an ass whooping.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:18, Reply)

I thought that was Cher?

( Bazongaloid, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:33, Reply)

It's the third best Turn Back Time song, first is Aqua, next is Speedway.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:47, Reply)

Evenin luvly peeps.
Evenin' Freef.

show, snow, snow. I think The tea-tray might see an outing tomorrow morning if this white stuff settles.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:44, Reply)

you will have to build and make pictures of a giant snow cock

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:49, Reply)

Can't, I have the boy and he'd be all disapproving at me.
in a few years... you snowed in yet?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:50, Reply)

no
it snowed a bit then stopped. I suppose that means my old house might be snowed in, a good excuse not to go clean it.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:59, Reply)

go *and* clean it.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:01, Reply)

sorry sir

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:03, Reply)

I'm drunk

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:52, Reply)

Yay!

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 4 Feb 2012, 21:57, Reply)

Good stuff

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:16, Reply)

Who else is staying in?
I'm actually devastated I didn't get to Waitrose in time to get a bottle of port to cuddle up to.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:04, Reply)

Aw I've got an unopened bottle of M&S port here

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:05, Reply)

I may brave the snowy conditions and come and get it.
The dodgy off license is open but it stinks in there and it's well expensive.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 22:12, Reply)

Roots, you'll like this
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaqC5FnvAEc&feature=related
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 23:00, Reply)