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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I'm off out to see rave legends and Hoxton off-license owners The Ragga Twins this evening.
What're you doing?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 16:57, 152 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
I'm staying in, Monty.
Going out tomorrow though.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:03, Reply)
I'm playing back-up tambourine for the church choir tonight.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:04, Reply)
Aw, man.
2nd Tambourine. It doesn't get much better than that, mike.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:05, Reply)
Well, for my money it gets at least 1 better than that but I'm just going to have to work harder and practice.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:09, Reply)
You don't need that glory, man.
The fame will destroy you in the end. Sure, it starts off with 1st tambourine, and you think you can handle it, you do, but then the pressure pushes you to the commumnion wine, and then it's a downward spiral and before you know it you're sucking off tramps for a hit on a crack pipe.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)
Story of my life.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:16, Reply)
Do you think you'll ever get promoted to lead or are you more of a rhythm player anway?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
I've a good chance because our lead has been in-and-out of hospital recently.
Indeed, the only thing that seems to keep him going is the life-force of the tambourine between his ancient fingers. I'd like to get the position on merit though, if possible.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:11, Reply)
Failing that, break his fuckin' fingers.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:12, Reply)
Sorry that would go against my Christian ideals.
Far better to led God deal with him.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:17, Reply)
Sometimes God needs a helping hand.
Holding a hammer.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:20, Reply)
Pub, I imagine.
What with it being Friday and the pub being there.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
In other news
I've just accidentally dialled 1477 instead of 1471 and have been notified that the last incoming call has been logged as malicious. I wasn't even aware this service exists.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
Me neither.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:09, Reply)
It's a strange and surprising world we live in and no mistake, Monters.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:17, Reply)
You are so very right in every way possible.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:21, Reply)
waiting for my friend to arrive
going to the pub
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:11, Reply)
Double waters all round, eh?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:21, Reply)
she's been clean for a week, by her 2 vodkas over 2 months formula she's allowed 25% of a vodka

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)
i;'m locking all my windows and doors and staying in cos i'm scared

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)
I am about 15 minutes shy of going to the pub
It's been a shit week and a shit and stupidly busy day and I'm going to go to the pub and have a pint even if I have to crawl there over broken glass to bloody well do it.
(berk, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:17, Reply)
Your mum
Or the pub. Probably the pub though.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:18, Reply)
The Ragga Twins, Jeff. The Ragga Twins.
Free to get in as well.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:22, Reply)
PUB.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:20, Reply)
great
every other fucker is off to the pub. I am bored in anticipation of this weekend now.

and then tuesday is fucking valentines day where you get to spend a day pretending you don't care that you're the one with no one to tell you you're beautiful (whether it's true or not)

grump
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:26, Reply)
Stop moaning.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:27, Reply)
no.
it is my right
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:29, Reply)
I'm not
Although I will be as soon as this child is capable of sleeping through the night.
Valentine's day is for shitcunts.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:28, Reply)
Valentine's day is a load of old balls
by all means feel grumpy because you're single but don't feel grumpy because you're single on one day of the year society dictates you shouldn't be. It's nonsense.
(berk, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:32, Reply)
it's the flaunting it that pisses me off, like being in a couple is *so* underrated the rest of the time
even when I was with someone, we steadfastly did not do valentines day
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:36, Reply)
I don't either
I'm making something nice for dinner over the weekend and I bought him a cd he wanted, but that's as big a fuss as is being made. All this sickly pink heart shit makes me heave.
(berk, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:39, Reply)
Wasn't that more because he was doing someone else?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:39, Reply)
in retrospect
probably so, but it was me who enforced 'beligerent day'
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:42, Reply)
I actually like Valentine's Day
not personally, but I like people being happy and believe it or not they generally do (not in the evening in restaurants though- those cunts look as unhappy as it is possible to be.)
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:41, Reply)
Happy with your new job pub or 'why, God, why?' pub?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:27, Reply)
The former and as it is the end of the working week.
Admittedly only a one day working week in my case.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:30, Reply)
Best of all the working weeks.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:38, Reply)
Nothing
I was meant to be at a party then some people were coming to mine after for more booze and bacon sandwiches in the morning but the party got cancelled. Thus I will spend this evening eating pizza and drinking beer and the weekend cleaning my old house.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)
Right now I'm drinking Espresso beer and cooking dinner.
Later on I will probably drink another beer and then go to bed early, such is the rock n roll lifestyle of a parent of a small baby.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:25, Reply)
No really, it's fine.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:26, Reply)
Hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:28, Reply)
Off to Ireland tonight
loading up on ebooks atm
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:39, Reply)
look at this thing
it's a cool thing

nkwiatek.com/
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 17:49, Reply)
I'm at a beer festival.
Thank you for asking.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:07, Reply)
I'm in the pub Crow.
*Waves at another boozer*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:14, Reply)
I'm drinking beer at home, Crow and Jeff.
*waves to actual drinking establishments*
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:15, Reply)
I'm mainlining crack straight to my eyeballs at work

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:18, Reply)
well done, both of you
*looks out at audience*
Didn't they do well, everybody?

*dies of long-overdue heart attack*
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:19, Reply)
uni work
gay
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:20, Reply)
Cheer up
Trust me, it gets considerably more shit after you finish your degree.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:25, Reply)
this^^

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:26, Reply)
Why do Americans pronounce "soldering" and "soddering"
Stupid mother fuckers, there's an L in it.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:20, Reply)
if they keep going that way
all L will break loose
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:22, Reply)
because they are wrong
Simple as that.

EDIT: crunchy's answer is better, for all the wrong reasons.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:22, Reply)
'Crunchy'?
Well, I ain't heard that name in many a year. There's not many alive who still remember Crunchy
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:26, Reply)
I remember Crunchy
and Camel related incident
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:31, Reply)
there were some before that
but we're talking 2004 or so
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:33, Reply)
not been around that long, still a noob.
but I lurked a while before joining
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:35, Reply)
I reckon it's prounced "Soljuring" because a jury is your pears and you fight side-by-side with them.
I'm not sure what 'sol' bit meals, I mean, I know it means sun, like Winter Solis, but I think it might mean something else.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:39, Reply)
today a student told me she had a dream
in which I, and the rest of her class were riding broomsticks around trying to find a TV for my new house
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:25, Reply)
OMG best thing from the newsletter
www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/5402/pg5402.html

BALUM RANCUM. A hop or dance, where the women are
all prostitutes. N. B. The company dance in their
birthday suits.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:31, Reply)
hahah!
MELTING MOMENTS. A fat man and woman in the amorous congress.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:33, Reply)

TORY. An advocate for absolute monarchy and church power; also an Irish vagabond, robber, Or rapparee.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:54, Reply)

TWIDDLE POOP. An effeminate looking fellow.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:55, Reply)
Brian Blessed turned up in my dream last night

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:32, Reply)
i assume he woke you up?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:33, Reply)
For the rest of the evening I will be attempting to get down from cloud nine.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:29, Reply)
oh aye?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:31, Reply)
Things are pretty sweet right now init.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:35, Reply)
I hope you get AIDS
/single
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:37, Reply)
Oh. Is he one of those who is 'getting some'?
puh!
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:38, Reply)
He's young and pretty ans soulless, of course he's getting some

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:39, Reply)
:(
I'm even contemplating a proper dating site where you pay and stuff, but they are expensive and I have rooms to paint
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:41, Reply)
Me and my housemates are going speed dating on Tuesday.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:42, Reply)
but but but
you said you had a lady? Have I missed something?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:44, Reply)
No you've missed nowt.
We're just going to laugh at all the tragedies on a speed dating night on Valentine's Day. I'm going to call myself Pablo and tell every single woman there I want to share my entire life with them.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:47, Reply)
Well, it'll give them a story
and no way it'll back fire on you!

*awaits next week's episode of Barryoaks*
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:49, Reply)
And you're willing to pay for this out of your own pocket.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:49, Reply)
Only a tenner.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:57, Reply)
Each to their own.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:03, Reply)
Haha, you should let us give you and your mates lines to try.
- I drink sweat like it's cola
- The rash isn't contagious, or so the african 'lady' assured me. I got it, but doesn't mean you'll get it.
- You remind me of my cousin, it's OK, we're not blood related.

...etc
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:32, Reply)
"How much does a polar bear weigh? Between 350-680kg."
Or, for that matter, anything else in this thread:

www.b3ta.com/talk/7356182
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:37, Reply)
that is an excellent thread

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:44, Reply)
Yaaay, I remember that one =D

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:56, Reply)
At the moment I might as well be too seeing as she's 300 miles away.
Currently trying to find out the address of her work place so I can send flowers for Tuesday but I have literally no idea how I'm going to find out.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:41, Reply)
I may have done this.
if her employer has a website there's often an address on it
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 19:59, Reply)
See, I have almost the opposite problem.
In the last week or two my outward facade as a hard-hearted cynical bastard has completely melted and I've developed a staggering crush on this lass who works for the same company, in the same line of work at another site.

Since I've spoken to her grand total of three times (two of these times were on the phone) I don't know her well enough to make any kind of gesture, or indeed gauge how well my sense of humour would be received.
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:00, Reply)
I said I was going to send her some to embarrass her.
And she went "I've actually never had anything for Valentines Day so I'd be well chuffed" which = PLEASE SEND ME SOME FLOWERS. I think. Either way on the card I'm going to put "told you I'd embarrass you x".
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:30, Reply)
It'll turn out she
gets hay fever or something
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:40, Reply)
At this rate she's getting nowt.
I can't find any flowers for less than about 30 quid. I ain't paying that for a bit of a laugh/slightly romantic gesture.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:44, Reply)
25 delivered, job done.
Just need to find out her work address now. I've found the biggest bunch of tackiest horrible flowers in the world.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:49, Reply)
I'm doing sweet FA.
You know, just for a change.
Last night I went to see my granddaughter in a show at her school. She was the chief choreographer and star, and I took a squillion photographs. I was grinning like a mong, too.

/proud granny
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:41, Reply)
How old are you?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:44, Reply)
38

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:46, Reply)
So am I.
But grandkid? Or step grandkid?
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:47, Reply)
Step-step grandkid.
I am never - and I can't stress how strongly I mean that - ever spawning.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:49, Reply)
good call

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:53, Reply)
I know, right?
The more I see of children, the more I appreciate my decision.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 20:56, Reply)
Don't spoil it for me =/

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:01, Reply)
What?
Did you want me to be your grandma too?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:02, Reply)
Oh noooooo, not mine, just 'a', but only for comedy effect. I'd much prefer you in a Princess Diana dress.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:06, Reply)
I MEAN, ME SAYING THAT FOR COMIC EFFECT, NOT YOU BEING A RANNY FOR COMEDY EFFECT.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:08, Reply)
It's too late now, Gonz.
You've ruined it.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:10, Reply)
Dude, you should wait 'till after valantine's day, I'm gonna nosh down on the goodies myself now.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:19, Reply)
Pffffft.
You said 'nosh'.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)
I assumed he meant
he was going to give himself a blowjob
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:26, Reply)
If he could do that, we'd never see him on here.
Where did you disappear to?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:26, Reply)
nowhere
just perusing the newsletter and my rss feeds. Sorry, should have left a note in case you got worried
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:29, Reply)
I need to know where you are at all times
so I can update my database.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:30, Reply)
still here
have you seen the picture of my lounge?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:31, Reply)
I certainly have.
It's lovely and bright.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:32, Reply)
Well I'm happy with it
I expect lots of people to be awkwardly polite about it. I may add a shot of the other direction tomorrow, where you can see the red bit.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:33, Reply)
Doesn't matter what anybody else thinks.
You're the one who lives there. If you like it, that's what counts.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:36, Reply)
yup
and I'm relying on the sexy shed to lure in the boyz
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:38, Reply)
sexy sheds are the best.
Have you decided whether you're going to run electric cables out there?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:39, Reply)
There seems to be
an old plug in there, but no electricity yet. Maybe, maybe not
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:41, Reply)
You want to get a fridge out there
stock it with beer. Instant boy magnet.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:47, Reply)
Damn Straight on that one.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:40, Reply)
Hah, I was well supprised when someone told me what it means these days....
... I was with a mate and asked her if she fancied a quick nosh.

Nosh is a yiddish word to snack on something bad for you, or to eat when you're not hungry.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:27, Reply)
What a schlamassel.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:36, Reply)
Donno that one.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:38, Reply)
And you call yourself a Jew....

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:38, Reply)
Hah, it's probably an american-jewish expression, the language has loads of veriations depending on your family's region/history.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:41, Reply)
It's usually spelt "schlimazel".
No it's not, that means an unlucky person. I'm talking bollocks again.
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:47, Reply)
The closest I can think of to that would be Schnitzel, which is basicly a chicken escolop.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:49, Reply)
Silly
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Schlamassel
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:50, Reply)
There was a word my Dad used a lot to mean the same thing, which also meant something else in turkish.
BUt for the life of me I can't remember it.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:19, Reply)
38 / 2 + 7 = 26...... YES ! !!!!!!!!!!! 2 and a half years in the zone !!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:02, Reply)
Evening kids
Nothing to report here - carry on.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:43, Reply)
Evening TD.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:45, Reply)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:46, Reply)
Alright Cavy
Alright b3th?

I'm economising by replying in one answer.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:51, Reply)
that'll save money

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:54, Reply)
I have a b3ta meter you know
And these are difficult times.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:55, Reply)
I'm sure we don't mind sharing.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:55, Reply)
I love you both equally
(I tried that once in real life - it didn't go down too well.)
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:57, Reply)
entertain us with your sex failures TD!
*sits crosslegged waiting for story*
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:58, Reply)
Ooooh yeah
this should be good.

*lives vicariously*
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 21:59, Reply)
I'd rather not if you don't mind
I re-live these things in dark sleepless hours.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:02, Reply)
Oh, you're no fun.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:03, Reply)
There have been moments
If you'd like a funny one - St. Petersburg, Florida, a long time ago.

Got chatting to the singer in the band at the bar I was drinking in. She said - "where are you staying?" in a "I'm coming back with you" way but I couldn't for the life of me remember the name of the hotel except that it was pink.

So we got a taxi round all the pink painted hotels in St Petersburg until we found mine.

The sex was alcohol afflicted.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:13, Reply)
Hahaha.
Good job you weren't in Brighton. You'd have been in that taxi all night.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:21, Reply)
There was a night in Baton Rouge, Louisiana
When at exactly the moment the bloke who was trying to pull me realised I was straight, I realised I was in a gay bar.

One of the best nights of my life.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:32, Reply)
HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=cG2XucnpBeM
This port is going down rather well, I'm off out in a bit and I am mad cheery right now. So should you all be.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:13, Reply)
I keep trying to put an Erasure link here
But it always defaults to a folk band.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:28, Reply)

m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F%3Fgl%3DGB%26hl%3Den-GB&hl=en-GB&gl=GB#/watch?v=YgPvRSAdK6o
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 10 Feb 2012, 22:35, Reply)

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