Fucking Pointless.

The IT Bods have given me a new phone. Now when it rings, picking it up is not enough, I have to then press a button before it connects too. What the fuck is the point of that? Phones work perfectly well - they ring, you pick them up, you speak. Why did anyone think there was any need to introduce another step into that process? Fucks sake.

What has made you feel like Victor Meldrew recently?

Alt: I'm going round hunting for the Faberge Eggs on 'The Great Easter Egg Hunt' in my spare time. What activity made you realise you may as well come out of the closet and be done with it?

AltAlt: Being Human is fucking brilliant, isn't it? (or have I just provided another answer to my own Alt?).
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:32, 193 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

you probably have a new phone system, most likely cos your company is expanding or sharing lines
if you're too fat and lazy to push a button you don't deserve to live
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:37, Reply)

problem is his fat fingers, he ends up mashing the entire keypad instead of answering

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)

he should be mashed up and fed to geese

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)

xcbbbbbbbbb;n,.z
xzcvxcz h sdhggds
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:39, Reply)

they have special phones with big buttons for fat people these days

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:41, Reply)

Can you order one for me Quints?
My fat mouth won't make the words properly.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:46, Reply)

oh lordy, scarpe's pissed again

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:49, Reply)

We have just installed a new embossing machine at my work
It's faster and better than the old one. However, we've had so many teething problems with it that more than one person has used the older one, just because we know it will work. Utterly mental.

Alt: The fact that I like musicals.

Alt Alt: Yes, although I've not seen last nights episode yet.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)

ive been saying for years now that a bunch of us should go west end and see a show.
I don't get why I dont go more often, I love a good show.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)

They've done it on purpose just to make your life more difficult.
That's the way we work, you see.
( Kroney, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, Reply)

And you wonder why you get 'Why won't my phone work?' questions...

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, Reply)

Although I hasten to add, I did not bother them with such a ridiculous, stupid question.


I asked my colleague who sits next to me.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:48, Reply)

I would like to participate in this thread
not least so you don't feel like a hopeless failure, however I have little to add.

I'm dying my hair later.

/dull and pointless.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, Reply)

oh no, will there be a remembrance service?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:42, Reply)

Nope, a quick shave of the sides and some lovely red dye.
Ah the joys of stable employment.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:43, Reply)

you're a hairdresser?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:44, Reply)

Yes dahlink!
no.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:46, Reply)

What would you have done with it if you had been made redundant?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:45, Reply)

Continued letting the sides grow out and left it a natural brown.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, Reply)

This conversation is too gay
I blame scarpo's alt.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:48, Reply)

My hair if not quite as bad as foxtrot's
but it has it's moments, you've seen pics, I assume.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:49, Reply)

I have seen yours

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:54, Reply)

Cool, now show me yours
/doctors & nurses.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:00, Reply)

because being unemployed with brown hair is easier than your boss thinking your a dick and that he made a mistake keeping you on?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:48, Reply)

hey kids I'm all alternative and I can make the fricking tea AWESUM !!!!!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:50, Reply)

My hair has been silly colours and styles in this job many times
They never cared, it just happened to be brown when the redundancies hit so I left off shaving the sides for a few weeks, in anticipation of job interviews.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:51, Reply)

i'm glad you have seen the error of your ways, grown up and decided not to be a muppet and dye your hair silly, unproffessional colours

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:54, Reply)

Sorry to disappoint Quents
I like being a Muppet, you see and intend to keep it up as long as it continues to amuse me.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:56, Reply)

your P45 will forever hang over your head like the sword of damocles

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:09, Reply)

Not in this company.
One of the reasons I like them is they are quite happy with me as I am.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:17, Reply)

You have, as management consultants might say, quit and stayed.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)

Is that a new haircare product?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:23, Reply)

you work for toni and guy

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)

Every time I get behind the wheel of my car
I turn into the most annoyed, grumpy bastard ever. I'm sure it's not my fault - every other driver seems determined to be on a collision course with me. My wife is utterly unsympathetic and I worry that my son is learning bad habits from me.

Alt: My love of 60s girl groups is a bit gay.

Altalt: TV? Yawn...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:44, Reply)

It's properly dead round here today, no?
No thread breaking the 100 replies mark?

Did everybody flounce and I missed it?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:01, Reply)

I did.
Quentin and Tangles drove me to it.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:03, Reply)

And I'd do it again, given half a chance.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:08, Reply)

Fuck off Hippy.
do I even need to say this any more, or can we just take it as read?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:18, Reply)

I think it every time I respond to one of your posts.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:19, Reply)

Then my work here is done.
*flounces properly this time*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:30, Reply)

i don't even have a car

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:09, Reply)

Ever since you said you wouldn't be on here so much after being caught out at work
People have been staying away out of solidarity with you.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:21, Reply)

I knew it!
I was the only one that kept this place ticking over. I'd do it subtley, so you'd think it was almost anyone but me, but I was the heartbeat really.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)

*something about Nick Berry*

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:24, Reply)

why does a love kiss stay in my memory?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:25, Reply)

AltAlt: No.
The first two series were great. Then it turned bad. It's now shit and doesn't even have Aidan Turner in it anymore to make it worth watching.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:03, Reply)

^Wrong on the internet.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:15, Reply)

B.O.R.E.D

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:07, Reply)

D.I.S.C.O.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:16, Reply)

D.I.V.O.R.C.E.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)

D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
EDIT: PISS!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:23, Reply)

F.E.E.L.I.N.G.C.A.L.L.E.D.L.O.V.E.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:23, Reply)

H.I. H.O. S.I.L.V.E.R.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:24, Reply)

S.I.H.T.C.N.U.T.

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:24, Reply)

who watches that tv show PointlesS?
It was right good in the first series, but now people are actually winning it and its shit
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:13, Reply)

I don't

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:20, Reply)

Am usually still at work.
Hahahahahahaha. Yeah, right!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:21, Reply)

i catch the last five minutes
i like how its always 'name 4 lepers from mogadishu whose left nipples are pierced' and everyone goes, erm, erm, frank? john? lenny?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:23, Reply)

Fucken Somali lepers.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:24, Reply)

BEST TNOT TO, YOU MIGHT CATCH SOMETHING

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:24, Reply)

I got into a fight with one.
He threw a punch, I caught it.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:26, Reply)

i threw a punch at somebody once
the rest of the party was a bit of a downer TBH
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:28, Reply)

I used to be a driving instructor and had to fail
the last leper pupil I had. He left his foot on the accelerator.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:30, Reply)

i asked a leper for a hand once, i won't make that mistake again

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:31, Reply)

*leperroundofapplauselols*

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:32, Reply)

A leper once said to me
FUCKING HELL I'M BORED! WHERE IS EVERYONE?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:35, Reply)

Did you tell him to fuck off and stop talking shit.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:36, Reply)

I sent him to /talk

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Good lad.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:55, Reply)

That naked fucking ape cunt talking about broken fucking bones and all
I think ive just broken my bloody toe
i blame him
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:36, Reply)

He's such a cunt

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:39, Reply)

i hate his face right now

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:42, Reply)

: (

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Another Pixies sig

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:44, Reply)

yeah, came on my ipiod yesterday, seemed appropriate

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:51, Reply)

And now I'm screaming (in my head)
THEN GOD IS SEVEN!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:00, Reply)

If only God was one of us.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:03, Reply)

I'd cunt punch him

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:05, Reply)

dont even look at me right now

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:46, Reply)

*stares hard*
O_O
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:50, Reply)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-17178014

what use is a 41MP camera when your eyes only see about 20 Mega Pixels?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:51, Reply)

You can blow up the image to enormous sizes without loss of quality
also your eyes don't see in pixels unless you are Kroney
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)

no but is the equivalent, altho i just found a website that says we see in like 500MP
so fuck that
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)

Buh?

( Kroney, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:07, Reply)

i dunno, something about startrek scifi eyes...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)

Classic Naked_Ape!

( Kroney, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)

He got you good and proper there.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:19, Reply)

There is a general lack of spark today...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:19, Reply)

I know what you mean
Slow days make us all slow.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:21, Reply)

i have just had coffe, maybe I should have more
It's probably the excel reporting tool I'm building that's sucking the life out of me today
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)

I'm going to go home and drink beer in a couple of minutes.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:23, Reply)

part timer
i might have some wines tonight
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:24, Reply)

Anyway, megapixels aren't the be all and end all of image quality
the sensor size and quality are also vital, not to mention the lens etc

/cavy
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:57, Reply)

What is it with you two?
Cavy was the other one with a Pixies lyric in her sig.
*narrows eyes*
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)

No idea, haven't "seen" her here in ages
Also I'm not really a massive pixies fan, so would'nt notice anyone elses sig anyway

*shrugs*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:02, Reply)

shurrup you, i was talking in like a literal sense
your eyes have only so much quality, its like games and stuff with 60+ FPS when you only see about 24
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)

Technology still hasn't found a way to stop me from taking shit pictures.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:04, Reply)

Good pictures are very much driven by the photographer and i hope always will be

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)

amputation is still in its infancy

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)

fucking fecal fetishist.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:10, Reply)

Wanna buy some scat shots?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Do I?
Do do do, dooby do dooby do do do di di di diddly do I eye eye eye?

I don't know how to write scat.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)

Ask John

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:14, Reply)

Not like that

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:14, Reply)

I'd rather be a camel.
I'd like to be able to eat and drink shit loads in one day and then forget about eating for the rest of the month. I'd also like to be able to spend one day out of a month just going to the toilet and emptying my bowels/bladder and then not have to do it again for a month. Camels can't do this, but if they could they would be able to conquer the world.
(I Am Plague @Mistication92, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:15, Reply)

I think your problem is that you have too many cats and live in Coventry

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)

The solution in Coventry is to put them in the bin.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:18, Reply)

Someone should put coventry in the bin

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:19, Reply)

Someone should teach you how to type.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:19, Reply)

Ninja spastic.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)

fairly sure this is an oxymoron

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:21, Reply)

Fairly sure you are a spastic.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)

Hi Monty
*waves*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:25, Reply)

Someone needs to let you know, in his absence.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)

Good job, although you forget, 'bent' or 'witless'

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:29, Reply)

I do not know what you are referring to

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)

I'm confused
Warwick University is in Coventry. Is Coventry Uni not therefore somewhere else?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:23, Reply)

No
Come on Badgo, you're a scientist. It is not logical to draw that conclusion.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:24, Reply)

true.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:25, Reply)

How's the arm?
So what actually ahppened?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)

He broke it.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)

got in the way of an undercut penalty corner strike
didn't get my stick up fast enough. Clean broke my left ulna about a third of the way up my arm.

apparently it's only 20% displaced so should heal OK. Stuck in plaster for 6 weeks though, gutted.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:31, Reply)

So the ball smashed your arm...ow

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:32, Reply)

yeah. It was fairly travelling.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:33, Reply)

wanking arm or non wanking arm?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:33, Reply)

depends which day it is. it's all about the wanking variety.
but it's my left arm and I'm right handed.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:34, Reply)

oh thank goodness

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:35, Reply)

Ah but the University of Cumbria
is based in Lancashire, and Oxford Brooks is in Oxford but not part of Oxford University... its a crazy fucked up world
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:38, Reply)

University of Central Lancashire tried to market itself as "UCL"
understandably, UCL itself got a little upset.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:46, Reply)

And its in fucking Preston of all the inbreed northern shite holes
It is just Preston Poly.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)

Answer:
Coventry Uni is in hell.
(I Am Plague @Mistication92, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:01, Reply)

4 cats is not enough!
You cannot have too many cats!
(I Am Plague @Mistication92, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:00, Reply)

how do i get google streetview to stop making me stare at the ground like a sulky teenager?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)

try not being a complete fucking retard

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)

or call Google and ask them to turn it off and on again

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:21, Reply)

thx have you got their number?
i can't help it, i'll be like walking down the street and then you run out of circle cursor bits and the cursor goes square, so your only option is to zoom, and once you've zoomed its difficulter to turn, and every time you turn you zoom in more and it gets even harder

and then you just go outside and look at your house anyway
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)

Google it

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:27, Reply)

aww man, why didn't i think of that?
EDIT AAAARGH, no phone number on their contact page, the BASTARDS
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:27, Reply)

like that time ross had a sandwich with "moist maker" in and it was eaten by his boss and he got rage
and had to rescue the babe in the tower from David Bowie by finding his way through some sort of maze?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)

Christ you are bored

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:29, Reply)

oh yeah....
thing is i have loads to do, but it's all boring
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)

ored ent and a massive spastic
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)

b3ta.turb0t.net/questions/offtopic/post1542618
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:55, Reply)

nononnononon, nothing like that
this is more like the time ross rolls over in the planetarium and theres a squirt sound and rachel goes 'aww, it's ok,' but then he replies 'HE COMES...' and Zalgo reaps their souls for the underworld
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)

This has me crying with laughter at my desk
soundcloud.com/vaughan-1-1/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like?utm_sou
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:40, Reply)

can i have a transcript? i don't wanna listen at work

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:48, Reply)

errrr no i don't have one

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:49, Reply)

WRITE IT DAMN YOU

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:49, Reply)

I'm guessing it's a load of old shit, Quinters.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)

i'm happy with this as a summary
but i have 5 minutes til home and i want something to do
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)

May I recommend
trying a Hutchence?

Or the slightly newer version the Carradine which is the same but in a wardrobe
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:54, Reply)

that might take more than 5 minutes of my time

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)

Send Sasha a creepy text.
Then cry because Sasha is figment of your imagination.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:55, Reply)

SHE IS NOT
we chatted on facebook the other day, she's lovely but we had tracey abck for a day and she's lovely too and she's sasha's mate
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)

we chatted on facebook the other day, she's lovely but we had tracey abck for a day and she's lovely too and she's sasha's mate A REAL PERSON, I AM A GRADE 'A' MENKLE
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:59, Reply)

after a bit of a walk and a little sit down I've got my phone out to reply yo this with
" :( "
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)

Your posts regularly have me crying at my desk.
Not with laughter, though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)

are you the real monty or the fake monty?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)

I'm afraid I am the real one.
I know you prefer the other one. Soz.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)

could you leave and make sure good monty comes back?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:55, Reply)

If I knew who they were I would gaz their main account for you.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:58, Reply)

gaz fake monty, dur

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:58, Reply)

I'm not humouring that shit. Sozords.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:58, Reply)

Seeing wittier, more succesfull and better looking people post can be upsetting
but you shouldn't let it get to you. look at what you do have...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:57, Reply)

Bum-AIDS?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:58, Reply)

that's the spirit!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:59, Reply)

Your spelling isn't very 'successfull'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:02, Reply)

this is NEW NEWS

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:05, Reply)

Oh God don't tell me you've developed a stammer too?
Heaven help us.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)

Briefly scanning todays efforts
may I say that

a) you are bunch of tedious dullards and
b) that you should delete your accounts and kill yourselves?

Thank you
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)

Isn't time you went and dyed your hair again?
Perhaps you could kill yourself at the same time by drinking industrial quantities of hair dye.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)

Perhaps I could.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:14, Reply)

so says Monty "interesting posts" Boyce.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:12, Reply)

Could be!
Oh man now I want to watch Hong Kong Phooey.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)

to the youtubes!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:16, Reply)

It's official: I need to be more of a cunt
I've just had a student cancel on me at 45 minutes' notice. Could really have done without that, especially having found out today that my finances are somewhat "Montied."
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)

Welcome to the Terrordome.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:12, Reply)

The Terrordome?

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)

The Terrordome

(TheColonel, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:16, Reply)

Not the Terrordome!

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:19, Reply)

ANYTHING BUT THE TERRORDOME

(TheColonel, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:20, Reply)

ok then, TO THE THUNDERDOME!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:22, Reply)

BUMDERDOME

(TheColonel, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:22, Reply)

hahaha

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:32, Reply)

It's a Public Enemy 'number'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:20, Reply)

You massive gayer.
Are you hunting them so you can shove them up your arse?
If so, it's the most middle class love eggs evar.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)

Nothing's made me feel like Victor Meldrew lately.
Fulham won their biggest game of the season on Saturday, I had an amazing Saturday night at Scala in Kings Cross, got talking to a girl who turns out is absolutely ace and she's from Newcastle and will be up next weekend. Also my mum's in town for the next couple days and we spent all afternoon walking round the good bits of town and in the art galleries. Taking her out for a slap up meal in a couple hours.
LIFE IS GOOD.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:19, Reply)

and you have a nice "tee"

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:22, Reply)

I have a few, I need more.
Oliver Spencer is getting raided for my birthday next week.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:31, Reply)

I LOVE THE INTERNET
THANKS FOR THIS THREAD SCARPE
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)

:)

(TheColonel, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:25, Reply)

Innit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:26, Reply)