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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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so without going into emo details, i think my worst nightmare came true yesterdaywhat's your worst nightmare - in real life or thrashing around trying to wake up?
alt: on the fluffier side - what's your favourite daydream?
alt alt: starter or pudding?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:21,
118 replies,
latest was 13 years ago)
Your ex was balls deep in your Dad?Worst nightmare would be something bad happening to the kids
Alt:
Tits
Alt Alt:
Starter every time.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:24,
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A British Isles chock-full of Paddies, Slavs, nig-nogs, chinkies, flids and benders.Alt: Lusty wins the lottery on the day my ex dies from diabetic complications. Epic lolz ensue.
Alt alt: a starter of black pudding.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:29,
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I had some black pudding with a spicy tomato sauce in a tapas place a while agoIt almost dissolved in the sauce and was truly nom-worthy
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:33,
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I saw a recipe in the paper the other dayfor spaghetti with chilli and crumbled, fried black pudding - that sounds fucking lovely, I thought.
In other news a mate of mine gave me a fucking enormous crab last night, for nothing. He kept just one claw for himself.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:36,
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Yes, right in front of my girlfriend.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:38,
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He's a cripple as well.Added a little 'special interest' to the proceedings.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:42,
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always knew you were up for including the minorities in your activities.(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:43, Reply)
Don't believe anyone who tells you that shaving your pubic hair will rid you of crab infestation(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:37,
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I know!I think my mum just said that for a laugh.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:40,
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i keep reading this as a response to AA's post about shaving(
rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:50,
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Nothing finer than a shaved scrotum(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:51,
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It's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:58,
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You just reminded me that I had a horrendous nightmare last night.You know the ones where you wake up a bit and can't move, there was a woman (in fact I'm sure it was Hank's ex wife in Californication) standing at the side of my bed trying to suffocate me. Then I dreamt Fulham were in the FA Cup final for about the hundredth time and it was amazing, but I always wake up just as I get into Wembley.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:29, Reply)
That's Ketamine paralysis for you.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:32,
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I just cannot get on with that stuff.Probably a good thing.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:54,
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Premature ejaculation lols(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:32,
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is "just as I get into Wembley" the football fan's "approaching the Billy Mill roundabout" ?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:43,
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I do lol every time this euphamism is raised as I live about 2 miles from a Billy Mill roundabout(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:52,
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Well, Viz is from your neck of the woods, right?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:54,
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I have loads of nightmares, normally involving being chasedThe worst would be to have something happen to my wife and baby.
alt: to be financially secure so i could travel the world and look after my friends and family.
altalt: Starter, but if I'm honest, I'd have both and cheese and then coffee and a bounty
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:33,
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The thought of dying without having the chance to say goodbye, that's my ultimate nightmare.Alt: More than once I've daydreamed of going 'full on Accord', and beating up 400 drug dealers with guns, knives, and guns that fire knives, before sexing it up with 30 supermodels.
Alt Alt: Starter.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:34,
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I'll take this post as your farewellso you can no DYAAKY
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:37,
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worst nightmare has to be having spiders crawling on me. Pudding, everytime.
I love puddings.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:39, Reply)
What about spiders pouring into every orifice?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:42,
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No thanks, just pudding. Thanks anyway.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:55,
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Going blindWhich will probably happen before I'm 60 unless I get surgery. Which I will. But the idea of eye surgery is probably about third on my ultimate nightmare list, after jumping out of a plane strapped to a naked Gillian McKeith.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:41, Reply)
Her neck skin would probably make a fairly effective parachute(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:43,
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at least if you shat yourself from fear you'd get a "medical proffesional's" opinion for free(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:44,
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It'd be much like getting counselling on the afterlife from Derek Acorah(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:49, Reply)
no one cares that Leeds lost a game of kev-ball(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:56,
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I doSo do their fans. Find me one, Apey. Find me one and all shall be forgiven.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:57, Reply)
I will notIt's fucking horrible there. I'm going to Sheffield in a couple of weeks, I'll see if I can find one with a long memory there.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:04, Reply)
Hahahah'kev-ball' is inspired.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:03,
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It's a phrase from my childhoodThat's how we rolled at St.Cuthberts
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:07,
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Mother of my kidhas has so much eye surgery there is nothing left to laser, just scar tissue. Were I religious man I might think this was the VENGEANCE OF THE LORD for her being such a cunt.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:56,
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This post has actually made me feel nauseousI mean genuinely unwell
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:58, Reply)
i'm not afraid of anything, in life once you can look your deepest fears in the eye and carry on as you were you know that you've made it and everything is easierright now i am daydreaming about tracey's rainbow skirt and michelle's see-through top
MICHELLE's BACK EVERYBODY WOOP!
alt alt no thanks
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:47, Reply)
somewhere... over the rainbow, waaaay up highh.....also, michelle is a french man
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:49, Reply)
That's a noLeeds fans don't know stuff. Can you find me a Leeds fan?
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:53, Reply)
My father-in-law is a Leeds fanAs is my step-daughter's boyfriend
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:54,
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Can I have their email addresses please?I've got a lovely little timeshare cottage near the banks of the River Severn they might be interested in.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:59, Reply)
I have anxiety dreams, although far less frequently than I did when I drank.They used to be that old chestnut about losing all your teeth, but that has been replaced in adult life about breaking my only glasses and not being able to see. Given that my biggest (and pretty much only, these days) panic in real life is if someone takes my glasses off me, this is understandable.
Alt: Not a daydream, but my favourite ever dream, that I woke up laughing from and am giggling now remembering it, was that I was wandering round Dublin and all I was doing was greeting every passing stranger with a raised hand and a hale and hearty shout of "Pot-Ay-Toe!"
I love that dream and want to have it again.
alt alt: Both, always.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:49,
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The value of bollocks may go up or down(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:53,
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That doesn't exactly surprise me. I was basically Monty from about 2005 to 2010.(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:52,
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My brother was drunkled and druggled from waking til passing outevery single day for about ten years. He's still not free of the grip of booze, the poor cunt.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:00,
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How the fuck could you afford it?Not you, obviously
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:03,
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A friend of mine's dance partner comes from an absolutely loaded familyAnd several of them are properly fucked up. Takes a strong personality to resist such things when they're so easily available.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:11, Reply)
Serious questionIs this shared proclivity for over-indulgence your fault/influence, or his? Or is it God's righteous vengeance on your mother for being unholy an' gay an' that?
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:04, Reply)
He is older than me.Actually it was simply the counter-culture of Winchester in the 80s. Literally everyone was at it. There's fuck all else to do round there if you're a teenager and every summer the convoy came through en route to Stonehenge, and there were travellers' sites all around the town. It's just a hardcore little town.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:21,
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Didn't consider geographyI prefer my theory about The Lord smiting your mother's womb with alcoholism
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)
That's actually a bit much to get into.Technically I think I'd consider myself drunk since about 1992, if not earlier.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:07,
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It does depend how you define it.And that's my counting it in a way that stops me thinking 'well, if I could just drink like I did when I was 20, instead of when I was 35, that would be OK'. You know?
This is all a little dreary and serious for B3ta though. I don't mind people knowing and talking about it up to a point, but the details of how I cope and the like are a bit much to share and will bore people to death anyway.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:12,
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Sorry mate; but seriously well done for beating it and copingYou seem like a good sort and I hope you have happier times now and to come
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:14,
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No, no, that wasn't a dig at you for pryingJust an explanation of what I do and don't feel OK talking about. And honestly, a large part of what I don't talk about isn't really that it bothers me, just that it would be as terminally boring as yesterdays bickering was.
And thank you.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:15,
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She ain't nothin' but a Golddigga(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:16,
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Teeth representPower. Or appearance. Or Control. Or fear of looking stupid. Or Money. Or fear of rejection. Or sexual impotence. Or being unprepared. Or poor diet. Or someone dying.
Well, that's cleared that up then.
dreammoods.com/cgibin/teethdreams.pl?method=exact&header=dreamid&search=teethintro
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 10:55,
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Ha!And yes, thanks for the reminder. I don't care what snobbery it evokes in other people, I fucking love that show.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:05,
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*trashy dickhead-embracing TV fives*Me too, have done since it began. I've never known how Nick Hewer keeps a straight face throughout the tasks.
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I like it as I sit therte going i could do this sooo much better(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:08,
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You wouldn't get on it for exactly that reasonThat and the fact that your face looks like a baboon's abortion
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how would you know what a baboon's abor....oh wait, was it you I saw outside the zoolological society's termination clinic?
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:13, Reply)
i'm just glad you made the sensible choicea ballroom dancing primate would have been too much for the documentary makers at BBCThree to handle
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)
Yeah, they said much the sameI offered to throw a self-replicating gerbil into the mix but they were having none of it
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:20, Reply)
I always think that.And then I get to work and think 'fuck it, I can barely do this, actually'
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:12,
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No matter how confident the personIt's incredibly difficult not to be mindful of just how embarrassing the fuck-up will be when there are TV cameras trained on you.
The fact that they're all carefully hand-picked dickheads doesn't help.
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)
That guy from the Isle of Man was astonishing(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:20,
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Stuart Baggs - The Brand?But everything he touched turned to sold!
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:20, Reply)
I'm with you on that, it's a wicked show, my favorite 'reality' one.The snobbery people say is shit, as if anyone watching the show atually thinks it's main goal is about buisness rather than entertainment.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:15,
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to quote my favourite forum userthe apprentice is "fucking shit"
cheers
(, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:08, Reply)
I once had a dream that ended in me waking myself up 'cus I was laughing.It was about a Joke Machine that I had hidden in my house. The FBI was looking everywhere for this machine. They kept on having comic slapstick accidents around the house looking for it, and that _was_ the joke, that there was no machine in the first place. It was so funny in my head.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:02,
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I used to have a re-occoring dream that I was being dragged backwards out of bed, and when I was half asleep/awake, the only way I knew I wasn't moving was when I openend my eyes, but it felt like I was.It made that Paranormal Activity film even more creepy for me when I saw it.
That I come home one day to find there is a dog tied to a post and a sign saying "please home me" and I have to look after it for the night until the shelter is opened, but they can't take it so I have to look after it, and I share it with Ma', so she takes it while I'm at work and I take it the rest of the time.
Starter, followed by two or three starters instead of a main, followed by desert.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:00,
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I've been having tremendous nightmares recently.Proper, full on, heart racing terror kind of dreams. These are not fun.
Alt: big house, lots of money, healthy husband. Boring stuff.
Alt alt: neither. I don't if I've mentioned it at all, but I'm on a fucking diet.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:19,
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I heard that that can burn many calories(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:22,
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curiously I had a nightmare about missing my train last nightCan't imagine why
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 21 Mar 2012, 11:52,
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