How eligible to live in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Island (inc the Channel Islands) are you?
www.guardian.co.uk/uk/blog/quiz/2011/oct/11/uk-citizenship-test-quiz?fb=native
Why shouldn't we send you back to where you come from, you filthy foreigner?

Alt: Apparently the wolf whistle is on the decline, as builders are too afraid of being hit with a lawsuit for sexism or some nonsense. POLITCAL CORRECTNESS GORN MAD!!!
What behaviour, now considered unacceptable would you like to see returned?

EDITED TO HELP ANY SCOTS READING WHO ARE UNSURE WHERE THEY ARE FROM.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:48, 298 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

I'm not British, I'm Scottish.
Plus I failed the test.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:49, Reply)

Is Scotland not contained within the island of Britain?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:52, Reply)

Does British include Northern Irish, Isle of Man and Isle of Wight then?
Prick.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:53, Reply)

yeah it does
prick
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:54, Reply)

The British Isles, you mean?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:55, Reply)

As opposed to the island of Britain, which would surely be England, Wales and mainland Scotland?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

Would you like me to edit the question to remove any ambiguity?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:59, Reply)

Yes please.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:06, Reply)

Should I have included other parts of the Commonwealth?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:12, Reply)

No. Unless your primary school level grasp of geography means you think that Canada is a part of the Island of Britain, which as has already been established, doesn't exist.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:16, Reply)

It doesn't exist?
Which one of these statements have I got wrong?
Great Britain is an island.
Within that island is a country called Scotland.
A Scottish man thinks that because he comes from Scotland he should not be considered British.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

Great Britain is not an island.
It refers to a landmass, plus peripheral islands, such as Isle of Wight, Arran and Harris. Harris is an island within Great Britain.

Scotland is a country within the British Isles, and is a member of the United Kingdom.

Alright?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:23, Reply)

No, you're referring to the British Isles
named after the largest island; Britain. "Great Britain" is the term for the union.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:25, Reply)

Great Britain is a political term
for the union between England and Scotland. I've always considered "Britain" as the name for the island on which England, Scotland and Wales are located.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:24, Reply)

*sigh* indeed
So what about people from, say, Islay?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:26, Reply)

They are from the British Isles
but not from Britain; they are from Islay. They are part of Scotland, but not part of Britain. People from the Isle of Wight are from England; they are not from Britain.

All of the above are part of Great Britain. Northern Ireland is part of the UK, but not part of any of the above. The Channel Islands and the Isle of Man are not part of the United Kingdom, they are dependants.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:29, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1658955
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

So you're happy to say that you live in Britain
but not that you're British?

Fuck me, even Salmond makes more sense than this, dozey.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:59, Reply)

Britain is a landmass, I live on it.
I happily say that I come from the UK, but 'Britishness' refers to traits which are associated with Englishness.

My nationality and cultural identity is Scottish. Not British.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:01, Reply)

Is that UK as in The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:03, Reply)

Yes, but I am talking about 'Britishness' as a cultural background.
I consider myself Scottish, not British. It has nothing to do with where I live, it has everything to do with culture, background, education, religious upbringing, that sort of thing.

Hope this helps.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:05, Reply)

"British" is a construct, yes.
But it's a construct that refers to England and Scotland. The British parliament might be in Westminster, but it's largely run by Scots. The Armed Forces might be based on the English army, but its hardest units are mostly comprised of Scots.

The English don't even know what being English means anymore, but we're not referring to it when we talk about being British. To us it's a partnership. That's what I think, anyway.

I call myself English, by the way, although I am British in the most basic possible meaning. An amalgam of English and Scottish blood.

Yeah, I'm a Unionist, so what.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:04, Reply)

You have no problem with describing yourself as English and as British.
I have no beef with that at all, but the two are distinct things.

I, on the other hand, describe myself as Scottish, not British. This works a treat when I am in Holland, Italy, France etc.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:07, Reply)

Ah, I think I get where you're coming from.
It's a shame there's so much negativity ascribed to being "English" as there's no reason why there has to be any animosity about it anymore.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:12, Reply)

"cultural" and "scottish"?
good luck with that.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:15, Reply)

More bullying from Swipe.
We were friends once upon a time.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:18, Reply)

"we hurt the ones we love the most"

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:22, Reply)

Wait, I am hurt deeply, so does that mean you love me again?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:23, Reply)

i don't believe in a thing called love

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

So what exactly are your feelings on the matter?
Srsly, all you seem to do these days is bully me, it makes me feel all :'(
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:29, Reply)

hurt too many times :'(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:29, Reply)

There is no such thing as the "island of britain" it's a mistake in basic grammar from Tangles
this of course doesn't excuse that fact that you seem to be unaware that Britain dies indeed incorporate northern ireland and the others
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:03, Reply)

Great Britain (Welsh: Prydain Fawr, Scottish Gaelic: Breatainn Mhòr, Cornish: Breten Veur), also known as Britain, is an island situated to the north-west of Continental Europe.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Britain

Even the Scots have got a word for it.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:04, Reply)

Huh, interesting that Gaelic is similar in pronounciation to Cornish and Welsh
since the latter two are Brythonic, not Gaelic. I was given to understand the two language groups were more separated than that.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:08, Reply)

interesting
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:12, Reply)

Honestly, Nakers, are you interested in anything at all?

( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

ed in anything ing
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:16, Reply)

i met some weird cornish dudes who thought they were celts or that cornwall was somehow scottish once

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

Not really that much of a surprise when one considers that those languages are Celtic.
Plus the Breton tongue as well, fact fans.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:14, Reply)

Yeah, but they're different language sub-groups.
Breton is also Brythonic, whereas Irish is Gaelic. Irish and Scots are a lot closer to each other than say, Cornish and Scots.

I was just mildly surprised that the pronounciation of Great Britain in all three languages were so similar, despite the spelling.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:16, Reply)

True.
I used to see gaelic cartoons on ITV when I was a kid.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:19, Reply)

Thanks Tangles, just waiting to find out if you meant 'British Isles' when you said 'island of Britain'.
The former would be a collection of several islands, the other would be only one island.

Hope this helps.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

No, Al, I understand just fine, just I think that 'Britishness' as a cultural definition is overwhelmingly English, rather than also including the Celtic parts of the UK.
Kroney understands, you really should pay attention more.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:16, Reply)

Which is a shame, since "Britain"
linguistically, is a Celtic origin term.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:17, Reply)

The word is separate to the meaning.
You know that.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:19, Reply)

Yep, like I said, it's a shame.

( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:21, Reply)

*sigh*
I am not referring to which island or country I live on or in.

I am culturally Scottish, and define myself as Scottish. I do not consider myself to be culturally British, as that includes things which are culturally alien to me.

Alright?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

There's no need to be defensive, I am not disagreeing with you.
I just think it's a shame that a word that was of Celtic origin is no longer really accepted by its people as theirs.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

Meh
Language moves on.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

How can we expect Americans to understand the difference
between England, Britain, Great Britain, the United Kingdom and the British Isles, if Jock here doesn't get it?
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

the chill up her skirt must be affecting its brain

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:00, Reply)

Because he's thick.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:00, Reply)

Kronester, I understand the distinctions perfectly.
It's you that's misunderstanding me, not the other way around.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:02, Reply)

Britishness is a construct, I have nothing to do with it.
People who describe themselves as British are usually English.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:56, Reply)

pretty sure the welsh, scots, northern irish and loads of others do to
YOU IDIOT
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

Note my use of the word 'usually'.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:03, Reply)

note my use of the word 'IDIOT'

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:04, Reply)

clickin hard

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:09, Reply)

Note my use of the word 'lolignore'

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:09, Reply)

'this is very upsetting'

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:11, Reply)

You're gonna have to up your magic number.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:12, Reply)

Aw, cock!
what was it at 14?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:14, Reply)

wanking in church

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:49, Reply)

Is that not allowed anymore?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:50, Reply)

Shocking I know
Our Father and everything
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:53, Reply)

I'm quite happen that the wolf whistle is in decline
now pricks need to stop beeping their horns when they go past a girl in a skirt.
Everytime I see it happen it makes me cringe.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:54, Reply)

try wearing a longer skirt

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:54, Reply)

I like to beep my horn and wave at people I don't know
Just to confuse them
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:55, Reply)

.....and I dont even own a car!!!11!eleven!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:55, Reply)

or shouting out of the windows
those cunts need kicking in the face
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:55, Reply)

WAY-HEY!!!

(PsychoChomp, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

tricky does that, and malc
they both need kicking in the face
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

i'd like to see duels and corporal punishment brought back
they was well good
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:56, Reply)

Duels is a good one
*slaps Q in face with glove*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

choose your weapon!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

Flans

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:59, Reply)

flansy that!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:00, Reply)

Alt: corporal (not capital) punishment.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:56, Reply)

meted out specifically by you to every motherfucker who looks at you funny, yeah?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

Everybody looks down on Battered.
Not because they're condescending, they're just all taller than him.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

Apart from you.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

I got wolf whistled at once. By a WOMAN.
Just once, though. I giggled, went red and shuffled my feet.

I'd like to see old fashioned nicknames coming back into vogue. I could totes rock a "Lofty". The nearest I get to a nickname now is being called "that milkybar" by some friends of an Indian I know.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:56, Reply)

In our office alone there are the following nicknames
CoCo
Big Billy Homles
Tiberius
Clong

Nicknames are an excellent thing
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

we've got milfy, tricky, jackie big tits

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:59, Reply)

+ say EH-O

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:07, Reply)

EXACTLY barry, EXACTLY

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:11, Reply)

I need to pee

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

(lends 2p)

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:15, Reply)

*heads to skeggy*

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:17, Reply)

FUCK, I got to quaestion 21 then pressed the back button on my mouse!
How the fuck would I know how many days a school has to be open? Stupid test
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)

i got 8 out of 24, nakers
i'll miss you most of all when they ship me out :(
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:00, Reply)

We'll ship you out of Britain and into Scotland.
Right dozer?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:02, Reply)

i'm not going there, with their cabers and bagpipes
that shit can fuck right off
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:03, Reply)

Hey, we'll welcome him with open arms.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:08, Reply)

as long as your legs are crossed, you filthy, underwear-averse peasants

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:11, Reply)

I got 15/24, but failed, the pass mark is 75%.
I'll send myself back tomorrow
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:09, Reply)

There's something called the "Considerate Constructor Code",
which disallows whistling, loud radios, shouting "flop one out your mother did", etc. Of course, in my previous career as a scaffolder, I would never have dreamt of anything like this.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:00, Reply)

Holy shit, the reason for your underlying racist outlook suddenly becomes clear.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:10, Reply)

I WAZ BOURN HERE I DONT NEED NO TEST

(PsychoChomp, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:19, Reply)

Just show then your British bulldog with Union Jack flag tattoo

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

Union flag, you ignoramadon.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

Jack off

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:21, Reply)

it's ok naked ape, he's wrong about this too
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Union_Flag

plenty there about it being the union jack and union flag
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:23, Reply)

If it is on a bulldog then it cannot be a Jack, as it needs to be flying from a ship to be the Union Jack.
Hope this helps.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:25, Reply)

yeah its still called the union jack, or the union flag either way
"the national flag of the United Kingdom, the Crown Dependencies and Overseas Territories is the Union Flag, which may also be called the Union Jack."
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:27, Reply)

Only in the same way that people refer to Trivial Pursuits, or to going to Tescos.
Notice that the phrasing used states that it is called the Union Flag, but that it 'may also' be called the Union Jack. What Wikipedia doesn't say is that it may be called the Union Jack by ignorant pricks.

Hope this helps.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

The only thing worse than an ignorant prick
is a self righteous one who won't accept when he's wrong.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

its ok, i really like how consitently wrong he's being today
by the end of the day he'll be sick of all these so-called 'facts'
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:35, Reply)

What, wrong about not being culturally British?
thanks Q dog, thanks for all the time you've spent being me.

It means a lot.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

because that's not what you said
you said "I'm not British, I'm Scottish."

which is clearly wrong, our school system let you down though, not your fault
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

Actually Q dog, I was schooled in Scotland, which has the better educational system, thanks for taking an interest.
Plus, 'British' has two meanings- one geographical and the other cultural, as does Scottish. I was using the cultural meaning.

Hope this helps.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:40, Reply)

Yeah, but we paid for it for you

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:42, Reply)

Nope.
Wrong there. Especially considering it was Aberdeenshire, which in the 80s was at the peak of its (still considerable) oil wealth, hence local and income tax receipts being rather high.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:44, Reply)

You are from Britain though, soz.
Though I do get what you mean when you distinguish between culturally British and British by geography.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

I know where I'm from thanks, but my initial 'Scottish not British' declaration was one of cultural identity.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:44, Reply)

You still failed the test.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

he can never be our friend now

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)

Send me back to bongo bongo land please.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:58, Reply)

Are we friends, Quents?
\o/
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:00, Reply)

I hate it when people says Tescos
it's retarded
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:35, Reply)

You pronounce it "Waitrose"

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

here yar
another site disproving your idea
www.flaginstitute.org/index.php?location=7.2
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

No, you're wrong about this one.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

No Al, a 'Jack' refers specifically to a flag flying from a ship.
If a Union Flag is flying from a ship, it is a Union Jack.

Perhaps it's due to the naval history associated with the Empire, that it's become referred to as the Union Jack.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:35, Reply)

No, really, you are wrong about this. And I will accept your apology, as long as it's written in an appropriate way.
www.flaginstitute.org/index.php?location=7.2
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

exact same one i just found!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

Oh man! It's like were totes meant to be besties!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

i thought a bestie
was someone who fucked animals?

as in, "sweating like a bestie in a petting zoo"

?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:38, Reply)

I was using it an abbreviation of best friend.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

yeah yeah
you and quentin fuck goats together, it's fine.

just get him to hold the front legs and you spread the back.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:52, Reply)

i'm good either way

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:54, Reply)

Can you let me know when you've read this link please

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

Dozer!
Hey Dozer! Have you read it yet?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:38, Reply)

he may have exploded

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:39, Reply)

google zing

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

Thanks for your indoubtable internet research.
Mine, from www.know-britain.com/general/union_jack.html says:

However, the flag was usually restricted to use at sea until the two kingdoms of Scotland and England were united in 1707. It was most probably from this use at sea that it got the name "Jack" ("Union Jack"). It was usually flown at the bow end of the ship, from the jack staff.

This is tedious as fuck now, can't you tell us about gardening or Yngwie Malmsteen or something equally tedious?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:39, Reply)

It's okay to be wrong you know
everyone makes a mistake every now and then, especially when they're sweating on the internet like an overipe tomato.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:41, Reply)

Sweating on the internet? You were doing the same thing bbz, due to you being a corpulent fucko and your initial flag research.
Thanks for caring enough about me to go that far though.

*pinches cheek and ruffles hair*
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:47, Reply)

Awwwwww, condescending replies saying "I'M NOT UPSET! I DEFINITELY DIDN'T GET UPSET ABOUT BEING WRONG!"
Are my favourite response to be called out.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:50, Reply)

Al, you really do have a lot of anger festering in there.
Maybe you should go and dig a hole or something.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:52, Reply)

Also, I'm not sure whether to trust a website which advertises holiday homes in italy
over that of an international institute.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:42, Reply)

It does have a very good graphic of a flag flying in the wind though.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:47, Reply)

Makes you think it's really professional.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:51, Reply)

the use of 'was' in your own source proves you were wrong

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

The information to do with what the flag is or isn't called
may well be true in that article. However some of the stuff about ships and flag locations on them is a bit bollocks.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:41, Reply)

Are you an expert on boats?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Er... boat lol?
Is that right?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:45, Reply)

No.
It's Boat LOL

Or BOAT lol

or BOaT LoL
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:45, Reply)

Nope, still don't get it.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:47, Reply)

TMB seems to be an expert on most things.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:45, Reply)

I thought that was one of the top /OT memes.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:47, Reply)

hockey and pricknames and SCIENCE

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

not at all
but I raced yachts inshore and offshore for a long time, so I've got a vague idea about the rules regarding flags etc and I suspect they are getting jacks and ensigns and what-have-you a bit mixed up.

I don't dispute their knowledge of the names of the union flag/jack however.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:47, Reply)

Jackstaff lols

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:47, Reply)

Jack at the front, ensign on the back, innit?

( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:48, Reply)

That's a night out for swipe

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)

I thought an Ensign was a naval rank.
Like Ensign Wesley Crusher in Star Trek:TNG

But, you know what, I'm happy to be corrected on that, because I don't proclaim to be an expert on these things.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:50, Reply)

ensign is the flag of national indentity on a vessel,
on a UK registered civilian vessel it's a union jack as the top left quarter of a red flag. on an RN vessel I think it's the same but blue.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)

it is also a rank though
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ensign_(rank)#United_Kingdom
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

possibly so
I'm not an expert in the navy.

*awaits strikethrough*
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:57, Reply)

not an expert in the navy. a man who loves having hot dogs pushed up his arse
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:59, Reply)

fair play sir. I wasn't expecting that strikethrough.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:00, Reply)

no it definitely is, stop arguing with me

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:02, Reply)

Ensign is your flag of identity while under sail whilst out of home waters
And yep, at the back. Jacks are just kind of random flags flow from the mast or jackstaff whilst moored. I'm pretty sure that you aren't supposed to fly the union jack at all unless at war but I'm probably about to be proved wrong by Al here.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

the ex wants me to go with him to get a tattoo
there are few people on the planet LESS likely to get a tatt than me.

the only place i would consider it would be on the ankle bone. and even then... NO.

although my friend has a care bear heart on her arse, which makes me laugh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:23, Reply)

is it the one with teh rainbow coming out of its belly?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:24, Reply)

no, you foolish boy
not a tatt OF a care bear.

all care bears have a little red heart on their arses. she has one of those.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:25, Reply)

i hope you've told her how shit that sounds

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:26, Reply)

she's a former ballet dancer
and at the risk of sounding like a dirty licker, she has the best arse you've ever ever seen. so actually the heart looks ok.

the annoying bitch.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:27, Reply)

when you say best arse and ballet dancer in teh same sentence i go :\
cos any fule know ballet dancers be tiny, but blokes like a bit a curve on a bum

its you women and your stupid ideas about attraction again
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

ah well, she's not been a ballerina for about 10 years
so she still has the long, slim legginess but also has arse and tits.

i have no idea why we are friends :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

i dunno either, rach
you just keep talking to me no matter how bad the bullying :(
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

you're not even the worst thing on here any more
sad sad times
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

bloody plumdozer, ruining it for everyone

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

I'm the worst on here now?
sadtimes.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

it's not all about you

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

The followup single from McFly?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

It's a sad day when I am happier with Bear Pookie and his horrible intolerance than I am with dozer and his appaling music taste.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

I'm finding your lack of tolerance of differing musical tastes quite upsetting.
And PD has got quite good taste in some areas.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Thanks Tangles.
Funny how a man with possibly the most conservative tastes on here is such an expert on popular music.

Kelly Clarkson lols.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)

Since he's been gone tastes have improved

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:50, Reply)

Rainbowlols

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:51, Reply)

No, it was a kelly clarkson joke
maybe if you had slightly more diverse tastes you would get that.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:52, Reply)

Al, I know who Kelly Clarkson is, my 12 year old niece likes her, as well as Twilight shit. She loves that kind of childish shit, what with being a child and all.
What I was doing there was acknowledging your love of cheesy rock music like Rainbow. I was adding another layer to the pun, and also illustrating how conservative your tastes are. And I have played SingStar, so am acquainted with the modern masterpiece which is Kelly Clarkson's song. How diverse am I? MEGA!

I shouldn't really have to explain such things to a maverick QOTWer like you.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)

How does that illustrate a conservative taste in music?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:02, Reply)

Well, if having the same teenybopper taste in music as a 12 year old girl is cutting-edge and wide ranging, then it's fine.
If not, then you are either: a tedious prick who likes American Idol winning, lowest common denominator shit; or a grooming paedo.

And having a fixation on rock music performed by middle class white men in a homoerotic manner is quite conservative too.

I really can't be sure here.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

The grooming ones are probably a bit better than the kidnapping ones
At least the kids get to feel good about themselves for a while first.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

Wait a second, you're saying that in order for your taste not to be conservative
that the only things you are allowed to like are things that nobody else likes.

Is that really what you think? Only I thought I'd better give you the chance to backtrack here if you want because the conclusion I've drawn above is entirely consistent with what you said in the post above.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

IS HE BEING WRONG AGAIN?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:12, Reply)

I don't want to throw that accusation around Quints
But I do think he sounds like a hoxton darling resident.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:14, Reply)

No Al, of course not.
What I personally define as 'conservative' tastes is ones which are limited to only a few genres, and within those genres, liking the most popular/ most well known artists.

Also connected to this is the outright dismissal of entire genres due to stereotyped views, such as 'all house/techno sounds the same', 'all heavy metal is devil worshipping angsty shit', 'rap music is just black guys mumbling about guns and bitches' and stuff like that.

I want to make it clear here, this is not aimed at you, it's my definition of conservative tastes in music, which is what you asked me to do.

I, personally, don't like reggae. This isn't of itself a conservative view, I just don't get on with it as a genre. I don't generalise about it, or cast aspersions in its direction. I like some 70s stuff, like Led Zep, Sabbath and Marvin Gaye, but I don't believe it's inherently inferior or superior to hip hop, electronica, hardcore, stoner metal or anything else. I will open my ears and give just about anything a listen.

Except reggae.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:17, Reply)

No, you've gone and contradicted yourself there dozy
you're already on record as saying that hip-hop is the greatest and most important genre of all time ever, so you can't now suddenly say that you consider it equal to all other musical genres.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:20, Reply)

No Al, I said it was the most important since Jazz or something.
And I meant in terms of how it reconfigured what music was and how it was made. That is absolutely not the same as believing it to be superior to other genres. There are loads of electronica acts which do similar things with form and construction of music, and loads of post-rock bands who do that too. But hip hop has had an indelible impact on western culture.

And I also believe that hip hop is analogous to punk in how it did that, being pretty much a DIY genre which came up from clubs and rewrote the rules of the time. Hip hop is mainly embedded in the mainstream now, just as jazz is the preserve of a very different group of people than when it started out.

I love hardcore just as much as hip hop; and country just as much as house. They are all culturally important in their own ways, and none is superior to any others.

What exactly do you get out of being such a prick online anyway? And re. your dad, if he has indeed just died, then my sympathies to you and your family.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:27, Reply)

Also,
From your description above, I am most definitely not conservative in my musical tastes. But don't let that stop you being wrong.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:21, Reply)

Al
You have gone on record with the hip hop stereotype.

Can you stop being a prick now please so I can put you back on lolignore?

thanks.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:28, Reply)

I'd admit to owning a number of public enemy albums
only I'm scared that due to your retarded definition of conservative, that you would classify me as only liking the most popular bands.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:32, Reply)

Never Again will I listen to such abuse.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:51, Reply)

"former ballet dancer"
She's got a fat arse now.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

or 'rachelswipe's ex boyfriend'
as he's more commonly known
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

which one?
there have been a few
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

Is it a bit depressing when you think that everyone that has ever deigned to put their penis inside you has since left you?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:45, Reply)

well, no
firstly, it's not true. your dad begs to come back every night.

secondly, it means there are hotter prospects to come. like the impending gossip that would blow this entire board apart if i were to share it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)

OMG! GOSSIP! ABOUT YOUR VAGINA! I FOR ONE CANNOT WAIT TO HERE THIS!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

you're spelling like an illiterate fucktard
sort it out.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

sorry.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:58, Reply)

How could this bee?
SIC lols!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:59, Reply)

I demand a gaz. Immediately.

( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

This^
My life is really this boring
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)

You are such a girl

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)

meh
wait and see
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

Aw HELL naw.
Out with it.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:58, Reply)

you have been texted

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:58, Reply)

naked ape and sportscow are having an affair

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:01, Reply)

:O SALACIOUS

( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:01, Reply)

CRUMBS

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:13, Reply)

you let superfly's dirty old man dad do you every night? :/

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:00, Reply)

Hey, lay off him, he died three weeks ago. Not cool man.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:03, Reply)

sorry to hear that
you should probably be quite cross with rswipe for still having sex with him though
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:04, Reply)

Well, you can't really blame her
a three week old corpse is still better than her usual men.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:08, Reply)

a stiffy with a stiffy

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)

i think you should stop bullying people with dead parents, it's inappropriate

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Please swipe, do I make cruel jokes about your mum?
Oh, hang on.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

He'll be fairly cool now then

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:13, Reply)

The one that's especially light on his feet.
Aren't you supposed to be in Barcelona, btw?
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:46, Reply)

no, barcelona is next weekend

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)

"ex"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:24, Reply)

yes. EX.
we're not having each other's names, ffs. although it would be amusing to have "swipe" tattoo'd on his butt.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:26, Reply)

it's almost instructional

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:29, Reply)

"Zorro here"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

so, why are you considering it, then?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:29, Reply)

of course i'm not!
i just ignored the suggestion
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

You could always tell him
you're going to get " *insert his name here* is a pathetic parasitic needy man-child " tattoed around your ankle.

Maybe that would get through to him.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

or to me?!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

I love you dearly but I don't think loading that information into a cannon
and firing it up your foof would get through to you in this area. :(
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

it sounds kinky though
maybe we could try it?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:40, Reply)

maybe indeed.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:42, Reply)

is he getting the names of his new boyfriend tattooed?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

He's getting a "W" tattoed on each arse-cheek
That's so that after Dutch Schteve has finished with him it spells "WOW"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

SPORT ARE TROOP'S!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

Thanks!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

It is to prove your identity

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

yeah you do, you need an AIDs test from all your bumming
of MEN
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:20, Reply)

You got a low mark too, eh?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

18

(PsychoChomp, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

YOU CAN STAY!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

13
sad times

I'm off to the nearest desert island
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:48, Reply)

16
still not enough to stay!
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)

i got 21
but i don't think much of the question system. instead of a handbook and a memory test, why don't they ask questions that you would know after living here for a while, like "what goes on chips with salt" or "name 3 examples of cockney rhyming slang" or something.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:50, Reply)

This^
I don't know much about parliament
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:51, Reply)

Don't know much about the French I took

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:52, Reply)

Hee hee.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:54, Reply)

Here's one for you then:
realcitizenshiptest.co.uk/quiz.php?n=1
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

9/10
i am british after all!
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:00, Reply)

10/10

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:01, Reply)

Btw - this was my score, not a rating of your post. Which, as usual would be 1/10.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:03, Reply)

0/10 due to Scottishness.
No questions about haggis, the Krankies and Kennedy Thompson.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:03, Reply)

The Krankies used to live round the corner from me, fact fans.
Like all proud Scots, they're not proud enough to actually live there.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

Did you witness any swinging parties taking place?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:06, Reply)

No, just ones where we ate porridge, wore kilts and played bagpipes.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

I like Scotland, my wife is from Edinburgh and we got married at Edinburgh cathedral.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

I know this.
Was it St Giles Cathedral?

Beautiful building. And there is something to be said for the elegance of the Presbyterian take on Christianity as opposed to the near-Catholic CoE stuff.

And yes, I am well aware re. transubstantiation etc, but CoE services are very similar to RC ones in terms of all the pomp etc.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

Yes it was St Giles. My mother-in-law is an 'elder' of the CoS. We would have got married somewhere non religious except she would have been very upset.
The fact that we aren't having a christening for our daughter has not gone down well...
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:13, Reply)

The CoS thing of only needing a bible to worship God is a wonderful view of things.
It's a pity that religion is such a crock of shit though.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:19, Reply)

you'd have at least got the salt and vinegar one right

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:06, Reply)

We only have ready salted in Scotland.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

Ever eaten a 'munchy box'?
This is not an attempt at a euphemism.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)

Nope.
But I still refer to fish and chips as a fish supper.

And use 'how' instead of 'why', and 'will' instead of 'shall'.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Is Mr Kipling a real person?
Stick that on your Citizenship Test.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)

An exceedingly good question

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:51, Reply)

And Aunt Bessie?
www.lovefood.com/journal/opinions/16113/captain-birds-eye-to-uncle-ben-the-top-5-fictional-food-icons

Anyone who buys ready made Yorkshire Puds wants shooting.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

They are fucking rank too
Really greasy
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:54, Reply)

Or ready made roast potatos

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:54, Reply)

is aunt bessie black?
is she doing uncle ben?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:57, Reply)

i got 8 out of 24, which is a win for me
Since I didn't actually know of the answers
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:50, Reply)

Well done then!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

It's a good job you didn't come here in rthe end
We would have turned you away at the airport
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:54, Reply)

you say that as if i actually made plans
You don't bash right?
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

I'm too busy with my real life

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 15:58, Reply)

so you don't need to worry about it in the end

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:00, Reply)

I'll go crawling back to my flat at a few minutes to midnight for an encore

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:02, Reply)

you started this

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:04, Reply)

Well, they're multiple guess.
So you should get a few.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:02, Reply)

AND SO I DID

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:04, Reply)

my old chemistry teacher called that 'beating the monkey'
as he reckoned a monkey on a 4- answer multiple guess test would get 25% you had to get more than that to beat the monkey.
teenagerlols ensued
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:06, Reply)

There's a repressed story of child abuse in here somewhere.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:08, Reply)

he was a double for Groucho Marx, too.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:14, Reply)

does this help
the above arguments?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNu8XDBSn10
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

start a new thread capn

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

in only just got here
how have I suddenly got this responsibility?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:12, Reply)

because you're the Amazing Captain Cavy
*do do DOOOOO*
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:16, Reply)

YAY!
only it's too late, Quentin's gone and done one
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:17, Reply)

*sniggers*

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:23, Reply)

I failed miserably.
Scottish people are British whether they like it or not.
( Peej, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)

BUT WHERE DO THEY FLY THEIR FLAGS!?????

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

UP THEIR SLEEVIES!

( Peej, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:18, Reply)

Oh Philip
Cultural/ political/ geographical distinctions, right here.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:18, Reply)

I never said you had to like it
I often claim to be Cornish not English but just cos I say it doesn't make it so.
( Peej, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 16:20, Reply)