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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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You, and you're the only one in the world who can do this, you can suddenly take a small little pill, and it'll give you any one single tallent of your choice, and you'll be the best in the world at whatever it is.Usual rules such as "Making more pills to do the same thing" are excluded. You can also give this pill away to someone if you'd like, such as a loved one.
And in a second question, which is the exact same thing, but you're not allowed to ever make money doing it, would you change the tallent?
Alt: lunch?
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:18,
176 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
there are "usual rules" for this kind of thing?the mind boggles.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:24,
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That's the one(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:37,
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I've had many thoughts about this.I think in a Three wishes/one pill situation. My first choice would be the ability to speak every language, and read/write
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:24, Reply)
Right, so that would be OK?But knowing every single thing about all forms of science, which by definition would allow me to duplicate the pill I had just taken isn't OK? Typical fucking "soft" subject bias. No wonder this country's gone to shit, Chompy.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:27,
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but languages change a lot slower than science, you'd be out of date within 6 months.(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:28, Reply)
wouldn't matter.I'd have the recipe for a pill to get back up to date, wouldn't I?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:29,
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and duplicating a pill that's already been metabolised is going to be a tough one even for you "so called" scientists.(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:30, Reply)
don't need to worry about that.It was made by some form of science, I now know everything about science, so therefore I could re-create it.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:31,
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What if they didn't record the method correctly.Only had a vague equipment list, WHAT IF IT WASNT A PEER REVIEWED TECHNIQUE
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:37, Reply)
I didn't ask for access to all scientific journalsI asked for knowledge of everything in science. Even if they did it in a secret cave, never wrote it down, and killed themselves after posting it to me so the secret can never be known, it's science that happened before I took the pill. So I know it.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:39,
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Well what if it was made by God?And don't tell me it can't be because you just pointed out that I can't prove God doesn't exist.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:39,
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I totally didn't.I pointed out that when you proved God doesn't exist, you still wouldn't convince religious people of it. It's a genius one-way tenant, the religious are allowed to point out the flaws in scientific arguments but the opposite is not allowed as "it's beyond human understanding"
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:41,
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But wouldn't that drive you to madness? Knowing so much stuff? (
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:13,
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But Chompy you can already read and write.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:29,
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I'm not sure really, as the whole 'fawning over celebrities' culture sickens meAnd if you're the best in the world at most things, you'll be famous. Unless it's something shit, really. Maybe the best white hat hacker? I won't be particularly famous, but I would be getting paid shitloads.
Alt: Steamed chicken and veg.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:26,
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Being the best in the world at something doesn't automatically make you famousWho's the best chartered surveyor in the world? Or the best curling scrubber person? Or the best musician from Manchester?
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:52, Reply)
Hence the disclaimer 'Unless it's something shit'(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:07,
Reply)
The last one was a trick questionThe answer is Pete Barnes of Sonic Boom Six.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:09, Reply)
I wonder how someone gets into bobslaying.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:14,
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I'd like to have the power to use clingfilm before it scrunches into an unusable ball(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:27,
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woah. these powers have to be plausible.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:28,
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Predictable reply most on here would use it so they can actually leave the house….Without getting attacked by moths/tripping over their own tits/impaling themselves on foam swords Etc. etc.
Alt:I have leftovers \o/
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:28,
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I'd give it to the mother of my child.The power would be the ability to die slowly and in screaming agony.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:28,
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Or you could get back together same effect but you get to keep the pill(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:30,
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You should hook me up with her, it would be a win for all concerned.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:15,
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I'd like be the best at giving away other people's money to help those less fortunate.Actually, sod that, I'd like to be the best at cooking.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:30,
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You have to be a right cunt to be a professional chef though...... oh yeah
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:32, Reply)
I really really want thiswww.molecule-r.com/en/66-cuisine-r-evolution.html?gclid=CJPyysvqgLQCFSbMtAod3XQA5A
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:15,
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I reckon it would be quite cool to have the power to prove beyond any doubt that God doesn't exist.
by which, I guess I mean, I'd like the power to make at least two thirds* of the world miserable.
*Or whatever % believe in some form of God. It may be higher than that. I bet it is. Oh how depressing.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:34,
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It'd be a total waste of time.Proof beyond doubt would merely be argued down as "you can't disprove things that are beyond human understanding"
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:36,
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Well in that case, I'll just settle for the ability to use commas correctly.(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:37,
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Short naps are better than comas(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:39,
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No-one can handle that kind of power. NO-ONE.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:39,
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The Candy man can(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:53,
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I'm alright as I am gonz mate.There are loads of things that stand out as cool to have, or be able to do, but not one strikes me with enough conviction to go for a one time shot like that.
I'd like to give my pill to whoever convinces me they will have the best use for it.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:39,
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Fuck that, I want the power to turn anyone within 25 ft of Kroney to turn in to a moth and flap at him.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:46,
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i'd be the best ever at being all powerful and benevolent leader of the world, revered like a god and loved like a fatheralt: same
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:46,
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I don't like cricket OHHHHH NOOOOOO(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:53,
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Think of poor Aleem DarHe'll have to resort to spot-fixing to keep his family out of the ghetto, and in the slightly more pleasant ghetto.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:53, Reply)
Am I not talented enough?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:52,
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you tell us. What are the pre-orders for your album looking like?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:53,
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Is that the best measure of my talents?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:57,
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I dunno, but I'm not going down the docks to ask the sailors about your "talents"(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:58,
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You can find out in person, if you like.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:59,
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Power over life and death probablyKeep myself alive until I'd had quite enough of human idiocy (Saturday probably, X Factor final) and stop anyone I care about from carking it. Before the petitions begin, you lot are almost universally shit out of luck.
Also would allow me to make my dream of Celebrity Deathlist a lucratively-televised reality.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:55, Reply)
Would you add the......all powerful and benevolent leader of the world, revered like a god and loved like a father? WOULDYOU WOULDYOU?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 12:57,
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You're a fellow red if memory servesso, given the history of Forest-supporting b3tans on /OT, your days are probably numbered anyway.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:02, Reply)
They always have been DarthSadtimes :(
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:03,
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Yeah, butthe last b3tan I met on /OT who supported Forest, right, we went to see them play at Norwich end of the season before last, and he was DEAD 10 months later.
True story.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:06, Reply)
No, I was suggesting it as an option for Darth.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:08,
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I would imagine my suggestion is probably a viable option for Darth too...(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:09,
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Darths a truck driverHe was a prostitute Nuff said
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:08,
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from the shame of the public buggering he got at Nottingham Forest(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:08,
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Shame?It was probably the highlight of the match
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:09,
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Indeed.Nottingham sounds like a ghastly place.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:09,
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Yep he fell out off a hot air baloon.(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:11,
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I'd line up a shooting gallery in my DUNGEON OF DEATHand after we'd run out of horse I'd kill Jan Moir
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:00, Reply)
I'm pretty sure thats not a 'tallent'. (
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:48,
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I'd choosde singing.Not in a 'I want to win X Factor' kind of way. It's just that I sing all the fucking time while I'm listening to music (and quite a lot of the time when I'm just thinking about listening to music) and it might be nice for the people around me if I wasn't literally the most tone deaf and talentless singer of all time, ever.
Alt: still trying to fight down the nausea, so no thanks.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:02,
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www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyFVG4VfPmg
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:06,
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Alt: Heinz 'Big Soup' beef and onion.It was reduced to a quid. Not unlike a veg-heavy stew and well worth the asking price. Still depressing as fuck though.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:15,
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Alt:Tesco tuna and cucumber sandwich. It was shit.
On the plus side it'll be a chinese pork and choi sum stir fry for dinner tonight with leftovers for lunch tomorrow.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:18, Reply)
Pre-packed sandwiches are the most depressing food I can think ofapart from 'Romanian food' which remains the worst I have ever had.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:19,
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I'm afraid other than a dim awareness that this relates to a football team you have me at something of a loss here.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:26,
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Explanation: Like nearly all London based football teams, they're desperately poor.(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:31,
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It is a football referencepre-packed sandwiches are indeed the worst type of food.
Unless someone on here is eating a jar of pickled vegetables and a cold lump of tinned luncheon meat for lunch.
(, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:32, Reply)
That sounds alarmingly like the shit the Bulgarian woman in accounts eats for lunch.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:36,
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I feel proper depressed when I see grannies buy a roast dinner for one that you just put in the oven.It represents to me something heart-renchingly depressing.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:35,
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Really?It give me the massive horn.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:39,
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Nah' man, don't get me wrong, I bet you get a good fuck out of it, but I doubt they'd be anything worth having in the will.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:49,
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The power to get the wife to suck my cock every once in a whileor the power to cause immense pain the someone just by thinking about it.
Alt. Birthday cake and tomato soup
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Peej, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:24,
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Half a mo - You want to cause immense pain to someone every time you think about your wife noshing you off?
You fucking weird cunt.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:27,
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Yeh but i'd direct the pain at your ex most of the time so fucking go with it.Is your address still the same? I want to send you a cuntmas card
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Peej, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:33,
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It sure is.Best gaz me yours as well then eh?
So I can send a letter to your wife asking her if she'd suck my cock.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:35,
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You'd have a better chance with meMy address was on the last letter I sent you, why didn't you put it in your filofax or whatever you old gits use.
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Peej, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:37,
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I put it in the filo-bin I fear.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:38,
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This is why no-one likes you!I'll gaz it dreckly as us pasty wogs say
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Peej, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:40,
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It's only one of many, many equally-valid reasons.When are you coming to visit then you bent flid?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:43,
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If by 'one' you mean 'a fucking punch' then why yes, yes you are!(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:08,
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i'd settle for that, sometimes it's nice to get post(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:13,
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I'll post you a botdog.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:19,
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-anic +asmic(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:23,
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Organic AND suitable for vegetarians.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:24,
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Alright Bono, haven't you killed enough of those kids yet?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:35,
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Alt: chicken chorizo and chipotle mayo sandwichpre-packed, but still pretty tasty.
I'd have THE POWER OF PERSUASION, being able to convince anyone I'm right about anything.
Then go into either politics, or more profitably found my own religion.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:30,
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Oh man I love the power of persuasion with normal mayo.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:37,
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It's just a cleaner flavour of persuasion, isn't it?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:41,
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Really lifts the persuasion I find, which could otherwise be quite stodgy.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:43,
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I think chipotle is one of the greatest things on earth.What could be better than chillies?
SMOKED ONES!!!!
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:34,
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packet of sainsburys basics ready salted potato squares.(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:37,
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If you serve them on a plate it's a real meal.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:40,
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choose a side plate to make your meal look bigger!(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:45,
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Sandwich plates in our house(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:58,
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Oak side plates, nontheless(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:58,
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i have some olive wood serving dishes will they do?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:04,
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You eat Olive Wood?(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:07,
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I HAVE NEVER ENDED ON AN UNSTRESSED SYLLABLE!!!(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:29,
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What's wrong with these people?'Side plates' they are and always will be. FFS.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:07,
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they are beastly proles Montague, beasty proles(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:08,
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thedoghousediaries.com/4760
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:53,
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I hate those knobbish 'internet cartoons'(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:06,
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today is the last ever printed Dandy jsykI was for the Beano really, so I don't care
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:09,
Reply)
I was more Look and Learn, Commando or Warlord, given the choice(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:13,
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Yeah, I'm not really a fan but it had just popped up on my 'News Feed' on popular social networking site The Facebook and seemed relevant to this question.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:18,
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I'd like the power to fly like an eagleOr a beagle
Alt:
Peroni
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 13:53,
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www.google.co.uk/search?q=snoopy+flying+ace&hl=en&tbo=d&rlz=1T4ACAW_enGB427GB512&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=8AO-ULHWG5DL0AWutIGABw&sqi=2&ved=0CAQQ_AUoAA&biw=1280&bih=757
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:10,
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YepHe was a Beagle though?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:12,
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You only watched it for WOOODSTOCK
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:13,
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Peanuts was fantastic. All the surrounding merchandise, twats wearing Snoopy T=Shirts, the Charlie Brown Christmas cartoons and adults with stuffed toys on the parcel shelf of their cars are shit, but the original 4 Panel Newspaper strips were fantastic.
4/12/1972: www.gocomics.com/peanuts/1972/12/04
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:18,
Reply)
Talking of shit...........(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:20,
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Two years before I was born, that(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:21,
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You share a birthday with my son, so you are in good company.Also, happy birthday sporto.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:23,
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ThanksThat is the 4th person now who has 4th as a birthday
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:24,
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Not December thoughYou can't join the special club
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:25,
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no, not decemberI'll start my own club, who wnats to join me?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:26,
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This holds great numerological significance.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:25,
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I think the Mayans are on to something(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:26,
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unfortunately for them it's wasn't modern weaponary(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:29,
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tell you what, you sign over everything you own to methen we'll see who is laughing on the 22nd
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:32,
Reply)
HA AHAH AHAH AHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAH
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:22,
Reply)
that comic strip ranks with your in cider joke from earlier(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:25,
Reply)
I like to put my organ in cider/VicReeves
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:26,
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*Shudders* Don't remind me of that(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 14:26,
Reply)
I like this questionI'd like to be an awesome musician, and yes, that would be even if I never made money from it
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 4 Dec 2012, 17:35,
Reply)
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