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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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You guys are rubbish at banning shit. I'll talk about what I like thanks.Today I've realised, that before I die, and preferably within the next year,I want to learn how to fly on a trapeze. I also want to meet the lions/elephants/tigers from the zoo.
What do you want to do before you die? anything awesome? Silly? weird? Illegal?
Also, you are now in a zombie apocalypse - the first item to your left, and the third item to your right are your weapons against the undead horde. What do you have to protect yourself, and how will you utilise them?
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:00, 165 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
I got this email from a friend who I recently introduced to another friend. "**** did something last night and he told me not to tell you. If you
guess, then i didn't tell you."
Why are all girls such gossipy bitches
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:02, Reply)
Re: GossipHi,
I don't give a shit what he did and you're a crap friend.
Regards,
Chompy
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:09,
Reply)
I replied, I don't care what he gets up to, I'm suprised he cares if I know.(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:09, Reply)
Chomp, she obviously thinks you're a massive girl.Girls confide in each other. That's what we do.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:10, Reply)
I fucking love gossip.I'm a total girl and I don't even care. Have you seen that Puss In Boots film? You know that cat that's all "ooooOOOOO" when somebody says something bitchy? I'm totes like that cat. Fucking love it.
I'd be all over this shit.
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:11,
Reply)
is that what you call malicious muck spreading and gossip?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:12,
Reply)
well whatever this girls doing is obviously that.But there's nothing malicious about talking about new couples who you didn't expect to get together, or about "events". Or the new man your best mate is seeing and how he is in the sack.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:13, Reply)
I wish I thought of that.I might restart the guessing game and slowly move up to "did he shit if your cunt?"
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:12, Reply)
If a guy shat in a girl's cunthe'd be fucking dying to tell his mates. It's not that.
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:14,
Reply)
How would you steer the conversation to that point where it was relevant for you to dump that piece of info?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:15,
Reply)
I don't know about youbut I'd burst into the pub and be all "guys, guys, shut the fuck up and listen to THIS"
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:17,
Reply)
I reckon it'd be more like your telling the storyand getting louder and louder and then without you realising everyone else in the pub slowly stops talking and starts listening and you get to the end and you're almost standing up and you go "and I shit RIGHT in her cunt!" and then slowly look round and see everyone staring at you.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:48, Reply)
I'm amazed you want to die within the next year.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:03,
Reply)
No, I want to do this before I die. And I preferably want to do it in the next year(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:10, Reply)
Alt: No I'm not, don't be silly.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:04,
Reply)
Alt. An Avaya telephone and an orange highlighter pen.This won't end well.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:04,
Reply)
Oddly I have an Avaya telephone headset and a bananaWe're not exactly Butch and Sundance.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:58, Reply)
As long as I'm not on a team with Nakers, I'll be happy with my chances.Both items are phones. I suppose I could slide one across teh floor and ring it to create a distraction.
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
she didn't even mention teams and still I'm not picked for the team that doesn't exist(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:06,
Reply)
It just got worse.The pen doesn't work.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:22,
Reply)
Being in a team means you're more likely to die.Walk to the nearest wood picking up food where you can, climb a tree, wait. That's how you'd survive a zombie apocolypse.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:11, Reply)
Being on a team means you can trip someone up and let the zombies eat them, thus allowing your escape.
Actually, Nakers, you can be on my team. Soz for being mean. You and me, bro.
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:12,
Reply)
\o/do we have a special handshake and a motto and t-shirts and then touch our willies together just to see what it's like?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:15,
Reply)
Nakers, you know you like it, just admit it already.no one here cares that you're a bigger gaylord than Darth.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:15, Reply)
i was joking :(nah, it's ok, I'm already at my fighting weight
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:19,
Reply)
The fatter you are, the more use you'll be to me whilst on my team.(
Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:21,
Reply)
by fighting, do you mean pushing someone over and then sitting on them until they die of asphyxiation?(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:21, Reply)
Not at all, I'm the only thin one here 6' 2 or 3" just under 13st(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:23,
Reply)
www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=57534
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
you must be a 10st weakling to think that is fat(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:30,
Reply)
I do think a healthy diet has contributed to my lean physique*, yes.*I'm not pronouncing this 'physick', by the way.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:41,
Reply)
Whatevs i don't want to be on your teamthe french hardly famous for winning recently
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:11,
Reply)
I'd like to do a base jump with a wing suitalt: I would have my headphones and my wallet. So I would use my wallet to buy a tank to kill zombies with and I'd use the headphones to listen to AC/DC while I did it.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
3/7 :(www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-20970635
one of them I got wrong because I'm not a bender who knows about colours.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:06, Reply)
Yes you are. have you looked in a mirror lately?Bedraggled hair? sunken eyes? greying skin?
you're three quarters of the way to BEING one.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:12, Reply)
Monty's the reverse Dorian Grey.He always looks ok in pictures, but holy shit.
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:13,
Reply)
In which case why would I want to engage my own kind in combatFFS AILSA YOU HAVEN'T THOUGHT THIS THROUGH HAVE YOU
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:15,
Reply)
you're trying to make up for lost time, and to protect the ones you love before you turn.very noble.
if slightly predictable.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:17, Reply)
to a zombie?You've been hanging round with those LARP types again aincha?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:18,
Reply)
A computer mouse and a spoonBit difficult decapitating a zombie with a spoon, although maybe I could garrott them with the mouse cable.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:13, Reply)
Before I die I'd like to see an end to WHISKY CHAT
HIGH AND GAMING CHAT
HARDWARE SPEC CHAT
and a few other things.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:17,
Reply)
that was that old thread, daddioGet with the programme, you square!
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:19, Reply)
OK before I die - preferably before half one today, actually, I'd like to beat you to death with a mattock.Is that better?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:24,
Reply)
I am all about the good zombie weapon choices, you know that.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:27,
Reply)
I want to move country againAlso I'd like to go back to uni, I would like to finally get a degree (cos I'm a thicko innit an dropped out of uni cos of being thick)
ZOMBIE Q: To my left is my work badge, to my right a set of headphones. I will dull the sound of screaming with the headphones, while using the work badge as a very tiny shield.
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Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:23,
Reply)
You can have my degree if you want it.It has been of no use to me.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:25,
Reply)
I don't honeslty think getting one will be a big boon or anythingI just feel like a massive failure cos I dropped out.
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Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
Why don't you save up for a professional qualification?Better job prospects, and quicker and cheaper.
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:29, Reply)
but yeah, I dunnoI haven't decided what I want to do when I grow up yet
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Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
Just get some obscure qualification that costs five grand and be a consultant.(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:34, Reply)
I can consult the shit out of anythingBut yeah no I didn't know about professional qualifications for some reason, I am shit at researching stuff.
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Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
could you consult a shit into a cunt?i hear that's big business these days
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:49,
Reply)
I can offer a wide range of consultancy services for a high powered fast paced delivery system for excrement into or around the vaginal area(
Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:51,
Reply)
I've clicked this so it lives on, out of context on the popular page(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:53,
Reply)
Not at all.Quicker and these days, slightly cheaper than full time education.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
Depends what you want to do career wise.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:42,
Reply)
YEAH - HARDER IN THE BOYS' SHOWERS!!!(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
I'm wasted on these imbeciles.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
You are.Bloody kids and their failure to remember shit that was on the telly before they were born.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:34,
Reply)
Listen Jeff.I've heard of Mozart and I'm not 300 years old.
That's right - I am comparing 'Boon' to the works of Mozart SO SUE ME.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:36,
Reply)
Oh come onBoon was loads better than Mozart.
Mozart didn't even ride a motorbike.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:38,
Reply)
Yeah he did.Oh no hang on I'm thinking of Jesus Christ Superstar.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:42,
Reply)
It's that poor kid I feel sorry for.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:43,
Reply)
Not you, the one you hit after you skidded on your motorbike.I don't care if that dustbin lid hurt you or not.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:46,
Reply)
Never stood a chance.And the poor wee lamb couldn't just give it a few days and then rise again like that SELFISH CUNT Jesus.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:46,
Reply)
This ^^^^I fucking hate people using the excuse "its before my time" FFS just about everything is before everyones time, you cant use it as an excuse for being a retard
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:40, Reply)
It's the most pitiful excuse for ignorance going.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:41,
Reply)
In this case I use the excuse that it's really not fucking important and very obscure.(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:57, Reply)
You wouldn't be where you are today without it old boy(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
LET'S ALL GIVE THEOBAN OUR SHIT DEGREES!!!(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
Sometimes I think about going into technical publishing or somethingjust so those four years and however many thousands of pounds won't have been completely wasted.
Then I think, well, it was parents' money, so fuck it. And then I don't feel bad anymore!
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Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
I'd like to be a copyright lawyer (SOLICITOR FUCK OFF WEVS) so I can bang these scumbags up for TIME.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:37,
Reply)
How many stars have you got on your badge?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:25,
Reply)
None, I'm a failure at gettin stars tooThere's a couple of wiggly lines though
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Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
Dude, wiggly lines are the equivalent to 8 stars!(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:34,
Reply)
It's also got a picture of me with a hangover on itBest badge
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Theoban What of it, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:36,
Reply)
I once had real difficulty getting into the USbecause my passport was 9 years old and the pic was of me aged 15 with long flowing hair and a fresh, cherubic countenance. 'This is a lady's passport sir'.
9 years of hard drugs and heavy drinking had rendered me unrecognisable aged 25 :o(
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:38,
Reply)
That would explain why you got beats from a girl(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:38,
Reply)
You mean techbag breakbeats?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:39,
Reply)
NO SPAZ i mean techno-wizard-deepbag beats(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:42,
Reply)
OH FFS WHAT KIND OF WANKER GETS *THAT* WRONG I MEAN SE'SLY.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:44,
Reply)
i'd answer your question but you'd probably just snub me again.(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
Don't feel hurt.She's a raging Bogan. That's just how they are.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 13:40,
Reply)
I want toSee some of the more obscure corners of the world, rainforest, Macchu Pichu (sp) etc.
I want to stay in The Palm hotel with an underwater view.
Alt. I have a Hole Punch and a spinny chair.
Fuck.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
This guy wanted to Zorbwww.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/zorbing-death-father-of-two-killed-after-1525302
Mission Accomplished!
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 14:06,
Reply)
why in these thingsdo they have to refer to the injured party as "father of or mother of" does that make any difference to the story?
(, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 14:16, Reply)
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