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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Listen I know it's bad form to stomp and even worse form to post IRL information about other posters
but I found a well LOL picture of Dozer that I had to share. See replies.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:33, 182 replies, latest was 12 years ago)


(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:33, Reply)
That was last Tuesday.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:35, Reply)
On your way round to visit The Hendersons

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:35, Reply)
*QI ALARM*

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:36, Reply)
Needs MOAR pink

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:35, Reply)
nice.
How are you montolololololololy Boyce?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:38, Reply)
I'm OK thanks boss-man.
How are you?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:39, Reply)
hanging.
Staff party descended in to strawpedo competitions and jager bombs.
I became the customers I hate.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:58, Reply)
Strawpedo?
Bartelby in a Worzel Gummidge costume?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:00, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSr3AbY4HtM&feature=youtube_gdata_player
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:03, Reply)
Is that Chompy's youtube channel?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:04, Reply)
Ah.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:06, Reply)
Fuck off, I always dress that way.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:11, Reply)
i do get you and battered mixed up sometimes

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:31, Reply)
You stomping cunt.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:41, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1884686
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:42, Reply)
Yes but bullying Brittas for being a turquoise Bigfoot is a justifiable reason wouldn't you say?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:44, Reply)
There is always time for bullying that prick.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:45, Reply)
Something something mo wax 1998 something

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:45, Reply)
I have reaction lenses so I wear sunglasses whenever it's sunny.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:54, Reply)
And when you are conducting staff interviews?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:55, Reply)
I didn't realise they were considered creepy until my girlfriend refered to them as pedovision.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:58, Reply)
it's particularly bad combined with the scatter cushion you hold in front of your crotch

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:08, Reply)
:(

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:08, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/6797818
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:10, Reply)
this response is lol
b3ta.com/talk/6797820
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:10, Reply)
DG is on outstanding form in that thread.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:13, Reply)
I officeloled at "fleshy rape spider"

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Me too, athough it's a pity they don't work when you're driving.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:56, Reply)
Cool story 'Supermatt'

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:57, Reply)
Second day running I get to post this
b3ta.com/questions/power/post783156
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Theobans's reply is bang on.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:11, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/badmanagement/post752958
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:12, Reply)
Fucking hell

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:14, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/slapstick/post621061
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:19, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/strangebeds/post68784
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Good god
What an unpleasant little man
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:25, Reply)
This is my favourite one of his.
b3ta.com/questions/letterstheywillneverread/post653940
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:30, Reply)
What. A. Mong.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:31, Reply)
Wait, there's more.
b3ta.com/questions/professions/post737372
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:33, Reply)
christ

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
those are definitely for cunts.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:01, Reply)
They're practical :(

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:10, Reply)
I had some until very recently
The problem I found was that it took ages for them to clear once you'd come in from outside.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:19, Reply)
people with those on always look they are hiding so sort of squinty eye disorder

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:07, Reply)
;(

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:10, Reply)
(-.-)

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:14, Reply)
off topic is just full of horrible bullies

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:55, Reply)
go eat a bag of dicks

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:55, Reply)
haha, imagine that, a bag of dicks, haha

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:29, Reply)
alright the doveston you foppish heteroflexible

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:30, Reply)
Listen the Doveston
Not everone on here is like that. Some people might find it funny to point at Plumdozer and laugh, saying he's some God-cursed freakish clown/Bigfoot hybrid because he's 4'11" and has fucking great big size 16 canoe feet - but not me.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:57, Reply)
Sofa lol

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:00, Reply)

Listen the Doveston
Not everone on here is like that.
Some people might find it funny to point at Plumdozer and laugh saying he's some God-cursed freakish clown/Bigfoot hybrid because he's 4'11" and has fucking great big size 16 canoe feet - but not me.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:09, Reply)

some might
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:12, Reply)
i don't know who plumdozer is

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:30, Reply)
Just think of a miniscule Sasquatch with a plastic flower squirting water out of it

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:41, Reply)
so, like funny in a timmy mallet way?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:54, Reply)
Not as likeable as Mallett.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:57, Reply)
HAPPY ST PIRANS DAY MONTY!


I can't wait to finish work and get absolutely wasted! Aren't us Cornish great! Thats not a question, we already know we are. So yeh its St Pirans day, not even carrot comments will bring me down on this most special of days! Everyone can be Cornish today even the fucking emmets!

I may already be a bit drunk sorry
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:13, Reply)
Sold many pictures yet?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:14, Reply)
Over 9000!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:34, Reply)
everyone relax, I got this

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:17, Reply)
YEAH FUCK IM UP FRANK THE FOREIGN CUNT THINKS HE'S BETTER THAN US

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:18, Reply)
I won't sit here and let you ruin another St Pirans day, Monty
I WON'T!
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:20, Reply)
I'd be surprised if they let him back into Cornwall after last year's debacle.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:38, Reply)

THINKS KNOWS
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:21, Reply)
I don't even know where cornwall is
I'm guessing France somewhere
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:21, Reply)
And to you PJ!!!!!!
I hope you have some lovely Devon clotted cream fudge and a traditional carrot-filled pasty to celebrate.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:17, Reply)
Ouch You done gone and went there.....with the Devon thing
He'll be spitting feathers now
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:19, Reply)
Not today my friends, not today

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:20, Reply)
Cornwall
Possessor of the world's most hilarious independence movement.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:21, Reply)
Shut up or he'll burn a holiday home

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:22, Reply)
i am staying at ours in august
i am meeting vipros for a pint. guess i'd better not invite PJ along too, eh??
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Burn Baby Burn Disco Inferno

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:24, Reply)
Id love to see Vippers again
I love holiday homes too
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:25, Reply)
too late, you think i'm evil!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:28, Reply)
Are you?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:32, Reply)
I have never called you evil once
How evil of you to say such things on the special day. I forgive you though! Invite me! I want to come honest I do!
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:34, Reply)
i'll think about it......
house is near watergate bay, is that anywhere near you?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:37, Reply)
Bout 20 miles
which in Cornwall/London public transport comparison is about 200 miles. I'd like to see Vippers again though, and of course meet you so if welcome I would get out the old horse and cart and make the pilgrimage. Shouldn't take me more than about 5 days.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:40, Reply)
i will keep you in the loop

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
BEST ST PIRANS DAY EVA!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:45, Reply)
Monty prefers this one

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:25, Reply)
I had a cornish pasty to celebrate.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:40, Reply)
Crimped on the top with Carrot?
Hey you know what they call the Cornish Pasty in Cornwall? We just call it a pasty! How awesome is that! Its like they come from here so we don't need to say the "Cornish" part. Also we call the Oggies! Wow aren't we just kerrrrrrazy!
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
fucking autoglass pricks
my windscreen decided to crack itself clean across so i have to piss around for 4 hours tomorrow until autoglass can be arsed to turn up and replace it. after explaining to him that i have a job to do, so telling my boss that i might be 1 hour late or i might be 6 hours late is going to go down like a cup of cold sick, i casually mentioned that the street is pay and display parking.

jesus christ. anyone would think i'd asked the twat to bring a unicorn horn, not a fucking pound coin. could i park somewhere with no restrictions for the work? YES I'LL JUST DRIVE THERE WITH THE SHATTERED WINDSCREEN AND FIND THE ONE MAGICAL ROAD IN LONDON WITH NO PARKING PERMITS, YOU STUPID SPASTICATED CUNT. is what i didn't say.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:22, Reply)
Auto glass will come out to you and replace the glass
HTH
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:24, Reply)
yes
this is what is causing the problem, that despite charging all that money, they cannot bring a couple of quid for the parking meter. bellends.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:29, Reply)
It's almost like he didn't read your post before replying to it.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:37, Reply)
we know this can't be true
he prints them all out and laminates them
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:42, Reply)
haha
"London"

haha
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:24, Reply)
i can't take the piss out of manchester seeing that i am from there
unless you live in a shit bit. do you live in a shit bit?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:30, Reply)
I don't live in Manchester now, Heaton Moor innit
before that I was in Salford Quays in a skyscraper full of Dutch lesbians
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:32, Reply)
lots of my mates from school lived in HM and i worked at the liz for years when i was a student
but it's nowhere near as good now they've done it up

why would you leave a block of dutch lesbians? are you some kind of nullo?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:35, Reply)
hooooooooo shit, I used to go in the Liz every night after work and get wankered
back in 1999 when I was still a chronic pisshead
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:36, Reply)
which is exactly when i was working there
how weird

i'm now wondering which of the regulars you were. if your real name is elliott, you're a titspervert and a total cunt.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:38, Reply)
oh lordy
we used to get in right after work, around 6pm then drink til closing time, if you remember a scouse lad with close-cropped hair then he was my alcoholic drinking buddy at the time

there was one time one of the bar staff joined us for a pissup and kept going over the road to the offy for cheap vodka, if that was you then I would not be at all surprised
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
i worked from 96-99 during university holidays about 4 nights a week
so it's inevitable that i will have served you. but i always had to drive back to wilmslow afterwards so i had to resist the cheap vodka.

as for me - do you remember the stunning 6' size 10 blonde with pneumatic tits and legs up to her chin?

well, someone sounding exactly like your mate once told me to get out of the way because he wanted her to serve him, the fucking cunt...
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:47, Reply)
that sounds like precisely the thing he would do

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:49, Reply)
i shat in his pint

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:50, Reply)
he'd still drink it

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:52, Reply)
well yeah
stockport innit
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:54, Reply)
I'm not very well.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:24, Reply)
Me either
*tickly cough and a bit of a headache fives*
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:28, Reply)
you two make such a lovely couple

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:30, Reply)
stop imagining them lovely coupling

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:33, Reply)
great
now you've broken my brain as well as my eyes. it's the amplesponge of sex.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Are you coming for a pint tomorrow or what?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:47, Reply)
yep!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Yay!
4pm at Dirty Dick's apparently. I'll behave. Probably.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:56, Reply)
i'll be there 6.30-7
how long can you stay?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Ah piss
My train's at 6. Bugger.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:10, Reply)
Aching joints, dizziness, sore throat, sour stomach, unpleasant cough
the only plus point is no snot as yet.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:33, Reply)
Its Aids
Sorry to be the bearer etc.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:35, Reply)
lucky you've got darth and all his hot spicy meat tomorrow then eh?
best thing for man flu, sweat it out.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:36, Reply)
Yeah, if I don't feel better tomorrow morning
then I won't be spending an hour on public transport, no matter how good the curry is. It's probably your bloody tubes that got me sick in the first place.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:37, Reply)
if you organised it and then you don't show up
you will never be invited again. EVER.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:38, Reply)
ugh

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:40, Reply)
you feel better when you get out and do stuff
take a lemsip, stuff your gut with spicy meat, profit.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Violently vomit on the hour's tube back to Uxbridge
before driving home for another hour in vomit-stained clothing.

:((((((((((((
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
the perfect end to a perfect night

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:45, Reply)
If I do come out, I'd better get a bloody hero's welcome.
I mean cheering, ticker tape, girls hanging off my arms, the lot.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:46, Reply)
how about a gobjob from darth?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:48, Reply)
You're not selling this to me.
Soz, Darth.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:53, Reply)
lies
i bet he combines the firm fist of a man with the tender touch of a woman.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:55, Reply)
They do nothing for me, I'm afraid.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:56, Reply)
oh come on, that was a great post

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:59, Reply)
I'm going back to bed

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:02, Reply)
+fallopian

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:40, Reply)
They came to my workplace and fitted mne
what lovely people.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:35, Reply)
i tried that
but that meant a different branch of autoglass with a 3 week waiting list, apparently. fucking useless.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:38, Reply)
Go with someone else?
Surely there are others
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:41, Reply)
i left it up to the insurer, that's what they said i had to do
it's that or pay for it myself, which frankly i'd almost do to fuck that guy off, but the windscreen on my car is surprisingly expensive, so fuck that nasty shit
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Have you tried offering sexual favours?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:45, Reply)
yeah
he said something about an excess...

before battered says it...
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Well I'm all out of ideas
I'd go and drink a bottle of wine if I were you
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:53, Reply)
Nice question bro
How did yesterday's epic bollocking go?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:27, Reply)
hahahahahahahahah
Look at the fucking state of this:
www.wolfgangsvault.com/jimi-hendrix/poster-art/poster/ZZZ007833.html

Only $800, and looks like....well, I really can't say. A retarded Mexican?

I think this must be an early work by that Spanish bird who uined that fresco.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:32, Reply)
It looks oddly like
a 1980's Lionel Richie
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:36, Reply)
are you saying all black people look the same?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:51, Reply)


(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:38, Reply)
Oh man I had no idea Kenny Rogers was Cornish!!
It all makes sense now.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:39, Reply)
You know, how he's so shit and I hate his guts and all that?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:39, Reply)
You love me though so the force is still in balance.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Phew!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
I prefer Kenny Loggins

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:48, Reply)
That is what he is

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Dude's got a dress on.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:47, Reply)
you keep setting 'em up ...

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Ha! He's wearing a flag too!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:50, Reply)
Save your money and put it towards a door he probably walked through
A bargain at only $1,000,000
www.wolfgangsvault.com/jimi-hendrix/backstage/door/ZZZ011896.html
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Who is this cunt?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
That’s Tangles he’s been posting for a while

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Oh right, yeah

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:45, Reply)
Hiya!!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:46, Reply)
I need a door!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Stay about from Jimi's doors

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Awwww man guess what I bought yesterday!
A SHED! It fucking 12' by 10' it's fucking massive! and its mine! All mine! I will be posting loads of pics when it arrives! Its got an inch thick floor too and it has windows and I am going to make wine in it! And hang a picture of St Piran on the wall too!
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:47, Reply)
The sports-shed is "on the list" for later in the year
I need a kitchen first
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:48, Reply)
I'm putting work benches in, and wine making cupboards and wine racks
and screens on the wall, and a bar, fridge, freezer, stove top, then get my turbo trainer and rowing machine set up. Oh I am so excited!
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:52, Reply)
WONDERFUL NEWS.
I will be having some shed time this afternoon.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:56, Reply)
Best news since my wife kicked me out!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:57, Reply)
what wood is the floor made from?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:05, Reply)
Oak of course

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:06, Reply)
I'm so retarded I'd buy that if I had the money.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:46, Reply)
Who is this cunt?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:47, Reply)
Jimi needs to lay off the Chil(i)e

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Technodullards: why does the picture I posted in the 1st reply to this thread keep changing to a red x?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:51, Reply)
because Al is a cunt

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:52, Reply)
Why didn't anyone say so before?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:53, Reply)
They're not as mean as me
I only said it because Battered told me that he would nick my lunch money if I didn't
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:55, Reply)
Thieving "Borrower" bastard

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:56, Reply)
because Jesus hates you

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:53, Reply)
THAT'S NOT TRUE DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER TOLD ME JESUS LOVES ME

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:54, Reply)
because you try and stick your cock up your arse at night

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:54, Reply)
Not just at night, either.

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:55, Reply)
Because you touch yourself at night
YEAH!
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:56, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post1885332
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:57, Reply)
I took too long replying :(

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Would this question not be better answered by someone who is not a technodullard?

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:05, Reply)
i tried a new thread
let's see how it goes
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:05, Reply)

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