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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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What would it take to turn you off from the most pant-wettingly perfect specimen of man/woman-hood specific to your deviant needs you'd ever seen?
Alt: Does anyone know any good nightclubs in Tower Hamlets?

Altalt: They do sleepovers at the Natuural History Museum. Where in the world would you like to have a sleepover?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:35, 221 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
wet pants

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:37, Reply)
Gushy O'Toole's Pie and Cocktail Bar

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:41, Reply)
less than 2 weeks till the secret Bristol b@$h thats so secret only I will be there!

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:42, Reply)
i'm having a secret bash right now

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:48, Reply)
Why hello,The Doveston! Are you well?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:49, Reply)
yeah, i'm alright
got offered a new job this morning, it might eat into my b3ta time
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:53, Reply)
Well then it's 'not for you' is it?
I mean come on, priorities and all that.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:55, Reply)
well, i was going to take it on account of it being better
but, you're right
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:56, Reply)
do your get to take all the time you would have spent on b3ta as holiday?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
i'm working a minimum procrastination clause into the contract

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
I've not been to a good puddle party for a while

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:50, Reply)
Where are you going?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:53, Reply)
Bristol.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:55, Reply)
^Dickhead.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
Pretty sure you already knew that.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:58, Reply)
Somewhere near the Bristol Hotel
I don't know Bristol you see
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:01, Reply)
There is a nice boozer called The Shakespeare next to the Bristol hotel.
I took Stunned there to calm down after he'd forgotten to book a room, the fool. Monty found the lack of booking amusing.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
Friday 19th I will be celebrating or drowning my sorrows depending on how my exams go

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:06, Reply)
It was very funny indeed.
The tranformation from 'outraged customer' to 'apologetic not-even-a-customer' was superb.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:33, Reply)
I live in Tower Hamlets so I am reasonably placed to advise.
However....

1) you've given me no indication of what you're 'into' - that said most types of clubs can be found there or in the adjacent area, from strip clubs to hipster bars to dance music clubs etc etc
2) I really don't like nightclubs of any kind any more so 'good' is something I'm gonna struggle with

altalt: I wouldn't mind a stay on Branson's island
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:46, Reply)
Know indication?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:49, Reply)
Know it? It's like a brother to me!
*cough* ta
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:51, Reply)
No problem
Hope you are well, Monty.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:10, Reply)
I'm going to see Hurts at The Troxy
I'm fine with all music, cheap entry and late finishing would be my priorities.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:56, Reply)
Just go round Monty's then.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
Door price: bag of beers, bag of drugs.
Closing time: when the above runs out
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:01, Reply)
Sold! See you on the 26th October

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:09, Reply)
clearly, if you are going to see "Hurts"

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
the Vibe Bar on Brick Lane is OK, but shuts about 2 I think.
XOYO might be on later but there are all sorts of things on there so have a look. There's always loads on in Shoreditch so have a google.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:59, Reply)
we're still making names up right?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
shhhhhh

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
Thank you
I had a look at Brick Lane. Is 93 Feet East any good d'you know?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:08, Reply)
I have a feeling it's closed down these days.
I used to DJ in there. This might be why.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:34, Reply)
A tach

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:48, Reply)
a rev counter?
It'd look odd, I suppose, but it could be useful.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:49, Reply)
When he's mentioned homebrew 25 times he has to return to the depot.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:50, Reply)
European directive innit
Bleedin' Eurocrats.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:52, Reply)
Do you mean a 'tache?
Or 'attach'?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:49, Reply)
I mean go fuck yourself your massive fayrey

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:53, Reply)
what about if they were a sex worker and might have diseases and shit?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:50, Reply)
I'm sure people pick up more STDs at call centres, there can't be much else to do between calls

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:52, Reply)
Subscriber Trunk Dialling innit

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
That's not very nice you bent spastic.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:55, Reply)
what's the matter?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:55, Reply)
You're being mean about my girlfriend.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:56, Reply)
'IT 'IM!!!!!

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
I'm pretty handy

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:58, Reply)

h r
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:01, Reply)
ra-ther!

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)

handy bent. And a spastic.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
No i'm not, she's not a sex worker you said it yourself

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
You really are a prick.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:02, Reply)
That's a little unfair, i asked you a very reasonable question
lots of people wouldn't fancy a go on a bird after she'd worked the streets getting ploughed by sleazy old men every night.

your gf was a stripper, this has nothing to do with her.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
One in 1600 children under five die of cot death every year.
Caregivers are usually unaware of any syptoms in the preceeding 24 hours, and no general symptoms present before death.
Typically the infant is found dead after having been put to bed. No cause has been found for it.
Not talking about your daughter though obviously.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
One of my daughters is under 5!
She sleeps in a bed though, is she ok?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:15, Reply)
She's probably fine, you're not a shit parent.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:16, Reply)
Thanks Chompy
This means a lot
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:17, Reply)
You know who makes shit parents?
Sex workers
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:22, Reply)
So you've gone away, had a think, done some google research and come back with this?

that's a bit unhinged.

Maybe you should calm down and get less upset, I mean it's just the internet.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:21, Reply)
Whoah chill out, I was just doing a statistical analysis about cot death, was nothing to do with you. Calm down.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:24, Reply)
Did I mention my new shed?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:25, Reply)
nah your're alright, I just worry that's all
I mean if she ever went to poland she may have "bumped" into battered, which would be awkward for everyone
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:30, Reply)
Can I join in?
Your girlfriend has terrible taste in men!
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Your shed has a wonky aspect ratio!!

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:24, Reply)
how is 12x10 wonky? its 4' bigger all round than an 8x6

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:26, Reply)
i joshing mate, your shed is a thing of beauty

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:30, Reply)
I'M NOT A FAN OF BRIEFCASES EITHER

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:51, Reply)
Bad teeth
Altalt: Salma Hayek
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:51, Reply)
Let me get this right, you *want* bad teeth so you can get 'chicks'?
You do know 'Austin Powers' isn't real, right?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
SHAGADELIC BABY, YEAH!
Nah, I really hate bad teeth. No matter how gorgeous she is, if she has a mouthful of broken tombstones, I'm OUTTA THERE.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:58, Reply)
Can you believe that people still find that funny?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
If I am hand-on-heart honest with you, I think the first one is jolly good fun.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:06, Reply)
That said I've only seen it once and that was fucking yonks ago

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:07, Reply)
It was fine at the time (particularly the first one)
but people STILL do impressions, wear the costumes...ugh.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:08, Reply)
I'd probably be a bit put off if she turned out to be a he.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:51, Reply)
just a bit though

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:52, Reply)
It all rather depends at what point in the proceedings the 'big reveal' takes place.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
yeah, I mean if you're approaching the vinegars
might as well finish, be rude not to.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:00, Reply)
Depends what sort of mood I'm in at the time
The deception would be the worst thing. I don't like being lied to, Tangled.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 14:58, Reply)
Oh sure
Honesty is the most important thing if you are going to have meaningless sex with a stranger of indeterminate gender.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:00, Reply)
Well if I'm going to enter into any kind of sexual congress, be it with a woman or a man type
There has to be an element of trust. I'm old fashioned like that.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:01, Reply)
You've got to know that the safe word is actually safe.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:02, Reply)
I always use "No please stop it hurts"
It doesn't always work, I'll be honest.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
Avoid "who are you?" and "how did you get in my room?" too
Too many false positives that way.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
"I like rape"
is always a good one...throws some confusion into the proceedings.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:06, Reply)
Seems to me that indeterminate gender doesn't bother you
you do specify that it would only be a problem if the person was definitely shown to be a he.

From this I conclude that you're ok with nobbing transgenders, transexuals, cross-dressers and effeminate men who hide their cocks.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
and nullos

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:05, Reply)
Just gaz me a pic and I'll let you know, yeah?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:09, Reply)
What?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:01, Reply)
vagina dentata.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:02, Reply)
Every time I hear that, I sing it in my head to the tune of Hakuna Mattata

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
I think we all do that.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
I don't know the tune to Hakuna Matata.
So I sing it to Kokomo by the Beach Boys instead.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:24, Reply)
If I met a girl and she was smart, funny, attractive and great in bed
I'd say no if she was bigger than a size 8.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:02, Reply)
It's important that girls are taught this from an early age.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
you wouldn't know if she was good in bed until you'd said yes, though.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
I read a review online

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
You can't get much bigger than a D with a size 8.
Thought you should know.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:03, Reply)
I don't like big boobs
how do you make 2 pounds of fat look attractive? Stick a nipple on it. I prefer a nice arse on a petite figure.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:05, Reply)
Women's sizes make no fucking sense at all.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:07, Reply)
smelly garage

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:04, Reply)
Just to point out to Dozer if he's reading, this isn't some kind of crazy hip new music.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:05, Reply)
Well you know what they say
"Better a smelly garage than a noisy shed!"

*shrugs*
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:06, Reply)
oh HO!

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:09, Reply)
Cockney accent

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:05, Reply)

Cockney Northern
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:07, Reply)
The full-on twang of our local accent is terrible, especially on a girl

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:07, Reply)
OWROIGHT MERSH?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:09, Reply)
FAHKIN SWE'Y BOLLIX MERSH
How do you type the 'dropped T'?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Just like that, or perhaps 'swe'ee'

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:23, Reply)
cf
Brummie
Scouse
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:08, Reply)
any common accent really

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:10, Reply)
Hey Monty
fancy some of this?
www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B004X2IQIY
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:21, Reply)
In truth, I don't think I do...

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:24, Reply)
sissy

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:30, Reply)
Ooh...

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:28, Reply)
Clagnuts.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:07, Reply)
best stay about from your mum then

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:08, Reply)
*SHED UPDATE*
Just ordered the connector to get the third screen going, shed warming party on Saturday!
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:09, Reply)
You have three tvs in one shed?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:10, Reply)
Monitors

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Why?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:13, Reply)
So you can watch from behind the bar
in front of the bar and to the side of the bar.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:14, Reply)
watch what?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:15, Reply)
Whatever I decide to put on! DUH!

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:16, Reply)
Granny porn.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:17, Reply)
If I'm in the mood

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:18, Reply)
+ Russian

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
Most Russian grannys are in their 30's

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:40, Reply)
Ah, the new Crowded House singlezzzzzzzzzzz

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:12, Reply)
I only know one of theirs (mecifully) and it doesn't fit with this gag,
so have an insincere 'haha, click! Nice one!' from me as I expect it's good if you know it x
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:27, Reply)
You actually know more Crowded House songs than you think you do
FACT
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:29, Reply)
Look can we talk more about my shed?
Its far more important than crowded house.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:33, Reply)
I really don't, you know.
Just that weather one. My sister likes them. She likes everything, the cloth-eared twit.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:36, Reply)
I don't like anything
It's much easier that way
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
urgh don't joke about cloth ears
imma cut this one off with a knife if it doesn't stop being all muffly and poundy
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
Hot water in a water pistol
job done.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:44, Reply)
Having a tit missing.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:10, Reply)
Poor Janet :(

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post1920138
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Slack mouth like a stroke victim.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:10, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post1920138
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Are you the ones wot dun that 'All Stars' song in Shrek?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:12, Reply)
Bath water up the fanny.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post1920138
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Facial tumours.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:12, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post1920138
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:12, Reply)
AA you know how you were saying who your favourite literary character was on facebook
well I googled the person you said. Oh dear AA oh dear.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:13, Reply)
come on then, enlioghten the class

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:15, Reply)
Vimes

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:16, Reply)
OK enlighten us a bit more eh

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:25, Reply)
Well its a Terry Pratchett character isn't it
fucking hell haven't you heard of google? I already said I needed to google his name
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:27, Reply)
But how do we find this 'google'?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:29, Reply)
ask jeeves

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:29, Reply)
hahaha

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:36, Reply)
Oh AA.
First Buchanangate, now this...?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:37, Reply)
It's know wonder, seen as I'm such a pleb.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:38, Reply)
I was more than a tad drunk when I wrote that
I am extremely fond of the character though
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:37, Reply)
Hands for feet and feet for hands

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:14, Reply)
I'd find that damned sexy me'self.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:25, Reply)
They do say what's pleasing to the eye and pleasing to the touch are seldom the same
But then I'd be willing to bet they've never been wanked off by a chimp
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:26, Reply)
I, on the other hand....



...am barred from marwell Zoo for life.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:37, Reply)
AltAlt: Downing Street, with Samantha Cameron.
I'd fuck her up the arse on behalf of the working class.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:15, Reply)
Sam Cam DEFINITELY does anal

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:16, Reply)
Not as well as DavCam

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:17, Reply)
Hairy tits

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:19, Reply)
stinginess, eg expecting me to pay for all the drinks
if i already knew/liked them, then physically nothing would really put me off - it's what's on the inside that counts.

alt: yes. the taxi rank to somewhere else.

altalt: the moon
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:23, Reply)
So what your are saying is you'd fuck a fatty?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:24, Reply)
i honestly don't care that much about looks
someone really hot can get annoying pretty quickly, and someone who is initially much less appealing can become v attractive once you care about them.

i have slept with a couple of guys who were not what you would call in good shape. one of them was amazing sex. one of them was...... yeah, fucking shite, never to be repeated.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:28, Reply)
I'd never get close enough to a fatty to find out about their personality.
I don't like sweaty women and I've sat near fat people before and they smell, they smell really bad, like rotting flesh, which is probably what it is.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:32, Reply)
that says more about the locals in cornwall than about anything else, i think
one pasty too many
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:33, Reply)
I used to work in a hotel in Scotland
and the head waitress was twenty five stone EASILY. She sweated buckets the whole day, dripping off her big fat nose onto people's plates. And she stank. Even at ten in the morning.
How anyone never complained about her is completely beyond me.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:36, Reply)
too many carrots innit

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:38, Reply)
+second homes

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
mine's technically a third home
is that worse?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:42, Reply)
worse than a 180 quid haircut

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:45, Reply)
My hairdressers (hair 'studio')
has gone out of business.
I find haircuts so traumatic I haven't been able to find a new one to go to yet, and my hair is in dire need of a trim.
#first world problems
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:48, Reply)
Come round my office in a couple of weeks
I'm getting a free haircut, I'm sure they could squeeze you in.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 16:24, Reply)
Oh.
I'd probably better nopt come out and meet you when you're in Bristol, then.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:34, Reply)
Im talking about these types
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1920222
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:37, Reply)
don't listen to a word
this woman is neither fat nor sweaty.

she does have mahoosive jugs, however.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:38, Reply)
They're even mahoosiver these days : (
A few more letters and I'll be on the downhill side of the alphabet.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
I find that comment sexist
Yes swipey she has breasts. I for one find it highly offensive that people feel the need to point out a womans breasts.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
as long as what's inside is money, eh?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:25, Reply)
tee hee

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:26, Reply)
it's a shame that you and swipey will never be an item.
you'd make a lovely couple.

no, wait, the other thing, horrifying.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:29, Reply)
nah
i've got plenty of that, because i'm capable of making it for myself.

but a title and a big house would be nice.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:29, Reply)
and yet still you want him to pay for you.
and to think women want to be treated as equals.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:30, Reply)
where did i say that?
50/50, that's fair.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:32, Reply)
I've never expected a woman to pay half on a date. Seems impolite to me.
Much better if they treat you to every now and again as a gesture.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:36, Reply)
Exactly, I bought my missus a car
and she noshed me off, seems pretty fair
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:38, Reply)
That would need to be either a cheap car or a fucking amazing bj

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
The woman's a fool.
mr b3th bought my car for me and I didn't even have to do anything!
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:41, Reply)
Be honest. It was a mobility scooter wasn't it?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:45, Reply)
The car wasn't cheap so it must be the other one

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:47, Reply)
i think it depends
the first couple of dates, fair enough. after that, though, it should be more even. esp if you earn more than he does. even with the loaded greggs hat, we ended up having a fair few fights over who paid; i often had to sneak off and pay it, or he'd have paid for everything, and i just don't think that's right.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:39, Reply)
Greggs Hat is loaded?
Then why does he dress like a cunt?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:40, Reply)
yep. he's ridiculously bright and gets paid an absolute fortune

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:41, Reply)
What does he do for a living?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:42, Reply)
Baker, isn't he?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:54, Reply)
I fucking hate it when people sneak off and pay
I used to date this girl when I was a student, I was broke and she was loaded and I used to scrimp and save to take her out, then she would sneak off and pay completely ruining the hard work I had gone through to save up enough to treat her.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:49, Reply)
Smoking. Or substance abuse, generally.
Having said that, I'm fat and old, so I probably wouldn't have much chance to turn anyone down.
Alt: No. HTH.

AltAlt: Inside the pyramids.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:34, Reply)
Good morning.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:35, Reply)
Silly Battered.
Half three is not morning.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:37, Reply)
I thought it was for you.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:38, Reply)
I'm pretty sure 'morning' is the same time whoever you are.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:40, Reply)
did you get woken by a moaning gaz from Chompy?

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:41, Reply)
I actually did get a gaz from chompy this morning
but it was entirely unrelated to b3ta.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:42, Reply)
No offence to Chompy, but I could never go out with a stripper.
Maybe it speaks more to my character than hers, but I find it seedy. I've had the opportunity, too. My future flatmate is currently living with a pair of them, one of them asked me out.

The trouble is, however nice they are, they take their clothes off for money.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:43, Reply)
I dislike agreeing with the French, but you're correct.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:45, Reply)
Whats wrong with a naked human?
as long as they aren't touching I don't see the issue
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:46, Reply)
Alright 'Graham Ovenden'

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:47, Reply)
I don't know who this is
should I ask jeeves?
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:49, Reply)
You posted a link to a news story about him earlier.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:50, Reply)
Oh, I didn't read it, not a Cornishmans strong suit im afraid.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:53, Reply)
It's the money changing hands aspect, I don't like.
Also I'm a little jealous. I wouldn't want my girlfriend shaking her bits in front of a jeering crowd. It's salacious, it's de-humanising and it's grotty.
(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:48, Reply)
all these strippers who claim it's art. No love, you're showing blokes your growler for cash.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:49, Reply)
I'd happily show my cock for money as long as I didn't have to touch anyone

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:50, Reply)
Happy the man who is paid for his hobbies.

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:51, Reply)
Small change lols

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:51, Reply)
it all adds up

(, Tue 2 Apr 2013, 15:53, Reply)

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