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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

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where did you all go??
what's the biggest mistake you've ever made?

alt: what's the best/worst piece of luck you've ever had? or do people make their own luck?

altalt: i need someone to paint my ceiling but the thought of organising it is giving me teh droop. anyone got a long brush?
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 9:53, 226 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
I'm still here (for 6 mins)
I'm not sure I've made any really stupid mistakes but ones that come to mind are bad relationship choices/thinking with my cock

Alt:
This entire year appears to be bad luck in the sportshousehold. Best luck I've had was finding about 18 deals of resin in a money bag in the pub and having the foresight to hide it in my mate's hood when Scary McBastard, our resident dealer, came in looking for it. That made for a happy month just before I started work of drinking and smoking every day

AltAlt:
I do indeed.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 9:56, Reply)
Recently I took on a job, and, seeing that the budget was £150, quoted £120.
I misread it. The budget was £1500. I could have charged £1200.

That'll learn me to proof-read.

Alt: luck don't exist, surely?

Altalt: pay someone else do it for you.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)
Ouch
Not good
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 9:58, Reply)
Spastic^

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)
Probably when I lost the personal pics and someone found them and worked out who she was and then tried to blackmail her
alt. worst was losing the fucking pictures wasn't it. Best was when I realised my kids weren't ugly like there dad.

Altalt. Buy a roller on a pole.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)
Joining this website.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)
The LOVELY Win Pug!

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)
BELLING DB4 90E
TALK TO ME
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:05, Reply)
What's up with it?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)
Nothing. I want to know whether or not I should buy one
The reviews I've found online have been useless
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)
This is the sort of decision you need to make with your heart, Teeaitch

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:11, Reply)
Last night "we'd decided" on a Rangemaster
this morning "we've decided" on a Belling. it's half the price, but is it half the quality? THE INTERNET IS RUBBISH.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)
I have found some great review of it
you should definitely buy one...
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:16, Reply)
*eyes suspiciously*
Is this reverse psychology...or reverse reverse psychology?
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)
I have found some terrible reviews of it
you should definitely buy one, because you are a cock goblin
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)
Goblin, perhaps
but COCK goblin? You sir, have gone too far.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)
Honestly
any chap asking for advice on what fucking cooker to buy should have to hand his testicles back... Its a fucking cooker just buy one that fits the gap in your kitchen
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)
SAYS YOU

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:22, Reply)
Yes says me
You got a fucking problem with that sunshine...



*puts internet hardman hat on*
*is quite scared*
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:24, Reply)
I'm VERY aroused right now

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
Having sold, fitted and repaired cookers cash in hand during my ' officially short time working then unemployed' period
Belling cookers especially are cheaply and badly put together in Turkey, and are not of the quality Belling stuff once was.
Get a Rangemaster.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:27, Reply)
Aha, now this is advice you can hang your hat on
Thank you
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
but would you hang BOTH your hats on it?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:29, Reply)
good point
I need to give this some thought
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:39, Reply)
i got banned from that last thread, someone wrote something about "sex"

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)
When I was in boy band 5ive I spend some time backstage with Keavy Lynch
I tried to cop a feel but came off worst. She really does fight like her dad.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:02, Reply)
My Secret Moonbase.
Telling you about my Secret Moonbase.
I don't believe in luck.
DIY
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)
Alright.
I'm looking for a tele lens for my new camera. It's a bit quiet at work, so far.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:05, Reply)
pervert

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)
It's definitely not for looking through girls' windows.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)
oh soooooooooooooo much this

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)
this post makes it look like you enjoy is pervert ways

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)
i did not think this through :(
it's not that i object to perverts, it's just... kroney. urgh.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)
hence the chest shitting

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)
Altalt: ceiling painting is easy
1. cover up everything to coving level with sheeting

2. buy very large tin of white emulsion, take top off

3. drop previously acquired stick of dynamite into tin.

4. Leave room quickly, remembering to close door

5. Go and make a cup of tea

6. Return to beautiful ceiling, remove coverings from everything else.

7. PROFIT!!!
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)
WELL I TRIED TO BE POSITIVE TODAY WITH A PROPER THREAD NOW THERES ALL THIS TALK OF MISTAKES AND BAD LUCK YOUVE BOUGHT ME RIGHT DOWN AGAIN. AND I WAS LATE FOR WORK AND AM TIRED AND GRUMPY. WELL I TRIED. FORGET IT.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)
should have gone to bed earlier
don't take it out on us
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)
>:-(

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)
you'll get wrinkles

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)
I have two like a '=' on my forehead.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)
i don't have any
anti-wrinkle cream obsessive
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)
They give me 'character'

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)
At least you won't get any "crows feet"

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)
GOT ALREADY BRUV

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)
Go out, get drunk, stick your old chap up some cheap tart and for God's sake stop bloo bloo blooing

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)
Ha! Okay then, I will.
#flangehound
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)
No, I'm not answering any of those questions, I'm sorry

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)
our loss :(

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)
No offence, but some things are just too personal, you know?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)
no
rory has shared all my personal stuff and everyone else's
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)
I've done....some terrible things

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)
we all have
maybe you should just let it all out
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)
That's what got me into this mess in the first place

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)
Very wise.
You can't really be certain who might be reading this shit.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)
If only I guarantee they were all as trustworthy as you, TUiB

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)
This is a bit embarrassing, as I have signed up to a few other websites under the username Two Hats and reposted some of the things you have shared.
I didn't think you'd mind
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)
It's ok
It's about time I faced some jail time to be honest.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)
It gives you time to rejuvenate and plan the next 'job'

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)
It'll be good to go back to the scrubs
See me old mates. Jimmy the Fist, Micky Knives, Paul the criminal. Ah, good times.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:19, Reply)
Biggest mistake?
Not throttling the life out of an ex-boss, watching his face turn puce while he fruitlessly clawed at the zip tie I'd slid over his head and pulled tight.
Alt: Best piece of luck was having a file given to me (unofficially and anonymously) regarding the aforementioned boss, wherein there are copies of documents in which he slags me off by email (personal AND company) and in print to TWO potential employers. He doesn't know I have it. He's looking for a promotion into the EMEA management of the group in which he works. Karma's a bitch.
Altalt: Painting ceilings is piece of piss. Do it yourself.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)
Did he try and make you stay after 5pm?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:19, Reply)
Worse...
.He tried to get me 'onside' by:-
a) Talking to me about football*
b) Inviting me to play golf**
c) Instigating 'team building' days where he displayed such unadulterated cuntery and absolute lack of understanding of his 'team' that once, on a paintballing day, we all shot him multiple times.

*A cunt's game, played by overpaid cunts, watched by tribal, baying dumbshit cunts.
** Another cunt's game.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:26, Reply)
Wait, his crime was 'trying to be friendly towards you'?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
I was kinda thinking this.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:31, Reply)
I mean, I know the levels of social awkwardness and autism are generally quite high on here, but this is bordering on sociopathy

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:34, Reply)
His crime wasn't 'trying to be friendly'
His crime was assuming I had certain interests due to his preconceptions about males in my kind of job. Also assuming that, as he was my boss, I'd drag my balls over broken glass to get 'in his good books'. Wrong on both counts.
As an aside, I saw two ex-colleagues at the TCT show yesterday who still work with the bellend. He's finally realised how hated he is among 'his' staff, so much so that he's almost stopped interacting with them - hence the attempt to move up into EMEA management.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:40, Reply)
Golf is a wicked game to play. I ain't a fan of watching it, but i'll knock out 18 on a chilly afternoon.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
Yeah Karma is a dish best served cold. Or is that korma?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:34, Reply)
Fuck off

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)
Yeh, bit harsh of her to suggest painting a ceiling to someone of your stature.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:26, Reply)
Exactly. So thoughtless.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:33, Reply)
+YFPC

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:30, Reply)
Eh?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:33, Reply)
FOYFPC

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:34, Reply)
You fat psycho cunt
Her, not you.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:35, Reply)
Ah.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:35, Reply)
yeah, because this is not at all appropriate to battered...
oh wait
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:45, Reply)
That's why I felt it necessary to clarify.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:49, Reply)
I wouldn't say a mistake but I regret not staying to see my A Levels through
Saying that, I wouldn't be where I am now or have had the opportunity to pursue DJing as much.

Alt. "You make your own luck" - Harvey "two face" Dent

Altalt. Im delving into my first decorating foray next year. I predict I will be shit at it
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:24, Reply)
i like painting walls (i've done a few charity things where you go and paint homeless shelters/people's houses etc)
but ceilings suck, your arms hurt after about 2 minutes
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:27, Reply)
Tell me more about your charity work

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
i'm no battered

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
If you read that in a scottish accent it looks like you're being questioned by the police for staggering around drunk

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:47, Reply)
If you put suction cups on your feet and walk up the wall, the change of angle makes painting the ceiling *just like* painting a wall.
No need to thank me.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:31, Reply)
Im not even going to attempt wallpaper.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:33, Reply)
i have no idea how people put up wallpaper
without ending up staggering around enveloped in a long sticky wrap of paper
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:49, Reply)
I thought Gay people had a genetic predisposition which made them good at decorating.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)
It's called the Llwelyn-Bowen gene.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:31, Reply)
I'm not a typical fag really

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:34, Reply)
bet you don't like cock either.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:34, Reply)
Oh I definitely do.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:37, Reply)

Oh I definitely do. GUILTY!
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:59, Reply)
Naker's mum.
To all three questions.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:30, Reply)
LAST DAY AT WORK!
Woot! and if I may also say "Yay!"
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:30, Reply)
Are you going away? You should have mentioned it..................

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:33, Reply)
Ai neaux!
The CEO of our parent company is on my flight tomorrow!
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:34, Reply)
Is that a good thing?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:35, Reply)
It's a bit shit.
I am upstairs though so hopefully he won't be.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:36, Reply)
Potentially awkward. I'm not sure what I'm hoping for most here really.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:37, Reply)
That'll be an eye-opener for him

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:35, Reply)
He knows me of old.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:37, Reply)
Only cunts say 'yay'. So yes, you may say it.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:38, Reply)
YAY

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:38, Reply)
1 more sleeps till hollipoppledooos!

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:40, Reply)
It's none because I am in a hotel tonight.
Early hollibobs!!!!
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:49, Reply)
holliboobiebobbles fives!

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:52, Reply)
s'long as im happy right now i cant have any regrets
well, apart from that fish i had the other day, fucken batter-spastics. youve only gotta get two things right, the fish and the batter, these Climies need to pull their fucken fingers out man

alt: in a world where the phrase 'luck of the irish' exists luck can go fuck a potato

altalt: ah, can yer knock knees not cope with a ladder then?
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:39, Reply)
don't get me started on the ladder again
we had all this the other day
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:39, Reply)
AND I HAVE GREAT LEGS
MY KNEES DO NOT KNOCK
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:39, Reply)
They just open right up?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:46, Reply)
BOOM!

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:47, Reply)
NEVER

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:47, Reply)
What does 'asshat' mean?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:41, Reply)
It's the difference between you and Three Hats.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:41, Reply)
oh
OH
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:43, Reply)
+OH ITS MAGIC

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:44, Reply)
You know!

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:44, Reply)
President of Syria

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:43, Reply)
Ah, ok

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:45, Reply)
'Who did you go to the Star Trek con dressed as?'

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:48, Reply)
I have mini macarons
slated caramel
ornage and chocolate ganache
Pistachio
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:51, Reply)
i wish i liked macaroons
they're so pretty. but they taste like ass.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:52, Reply)
Did you rim chompy?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:53, Reply)
HOLY SHIT WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU???

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:56, Reply)
hahaha

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:00, Reply)
prolly like licking a pooey ashtray

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:02, Reply)
You put his dick in your mouth

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:05, Reply)
No wonder your fingers are too fat to type properly

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:52, Reply)
it's for cancer or some shit

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:53, Reply)
I think it's more likely to give you diabetes than cancer.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:54, Reply)
honeycomb "fridge cake" now

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:56, Reply)
Fucking hell,
Fat fucker.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:57, Reply)
i've seen a picture of him
he's quite thin for an Internet
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:58, Reply)
what? you stalking me?

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:59, Reply)
linkedin "people you might know" innit

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:11, Reply)
hmmm...that's a fucking shit picture an all
all photos of me I am drunk so it was hard to find one
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:12, Reply)
i thought it was probably quite a flattering one

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:15, Reply)
}:(

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:19, Reply)
HEH

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:20, Reply)
I was just having a pot / kettle moment.
*gets stuck in chair*
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:00, Reply)
Lemin drizzle cake next

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:58, Reply)
this is the only cake worth having
the rest can fuck off
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:59, Reply)
I fackin loves it I do

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:00, Reply)
the stupid shop had sold out of smooth orange AGAIN
so now i've somehow ended up with a cookie dough friji milkshake.

it's as grim as it sounds :(
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:12, Reply)
Cake is a waste of time.
It's never as nice as you think it's going to be.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Still got a brownie, might save that for later

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:03, Reply)
RACIST

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:03, Reply)
I only ever eat them at the back of the bus

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:04, Reply)
My sincere apologies, I didn't realise that Rosa.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:05, Reply)
I went nowhere.
I will later, though. Outside. Where the 'people' are. I'm a bit scared about it, if I'm honest, but I hope I'll survive.

Alt: What's that quote? "Funny how the ones who work the hardest are the ones who have the best luck"
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:53, Reply)
I disagree with that quote.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:55, Reply)
I quite patently disprove it.
I have awesome luck. Never won the lottery or anything, but I think I generally live a charmed life.

It's the people around me who suffer.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:59, Reply)
if rory were here he would tear this apart like a pitbull with a baby

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 10:59, Reply)
I would expect nothing less from everybody's favourite pikey.

(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:01, Reply)
I've no regrets
No tears goodbye,
etc.
(, Fri 27 Sep 2013, 11:00, Reply)

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