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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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There's been a few moans and complaints about this.
I wasn't really arsed.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-25322260
Do you think it's disrespectful, or do you not give a jot? I've always tried to be reasonably upbeat at funerals, they usually end up in a piss up, so you might as well keep the serious stuff for private.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:19, 120 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
At least they're not belming I suppose.
Michelle looks impressed(!)
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:25, Reply)
Michelle was pissed off through that whole thing. Solemn, perhaps.
I was more pissed off that Graham Norton got a ticking off for wearing an AIDS ribbon by the Beeb. Apparently they don't want to endorse charities, yet presenters are made to wear a poppy.

Cunts.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:27, Reply)
They don't want to endorse charities...
And yet Children in Need, Comic Relief...
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:28, Reply)
CHILDREN IN NEED OF A GOOD SLAP MORE LIKE!!!!!!!!!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:29, Reply)
I hear ya.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:30, Reply)
Which supposedly funds drugs, guns and death, according to the highly impartial Beeb news.
Auntie really does have this whole self-flagellation thing down pat in the last year or two.
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:31, Reply)
Comic relief are apparently 'reviewing their investment programme'.
Fancy.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:32, Reply)
most investment funds hold shares in that sort of thing
And, seeing as even the best ethical funds only deliver mediocre investment performance, investing in alcohol, tobacco and weapons is exactly what I would expect a charity to do.

Comic Relief just need a better IFA.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:33, Reply)
An organisation we work with refuses to be named in an investment programme we're currently developing
on the grounds that it's lottery funded and therefore against their Christian values. And yet they seem quite happy to take local government funding, which is raised by taxes, and Jebus hated the tax man.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:36, Reply)
Jesus said to give unto Caesar what is Caesar's though.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:37, Reply)
The stupid cunt.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:38, Reply)
Me, I won't be PROPERLY happy unless a film crew follows my fiver all the way from my bank account until it ends up in the hands of the poor person.
And it zooms in just enough that I can check the serial number is still the same and be able to say a relieved "yes, that's MY five pound note".
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:37, Reply)
your pension probably invests in Nestle, Monsanto and BAE

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:39, Reply)
That's why I don't have one.
My finances are planned out meticulously, I intend to declare myself bankrupt on my 70th birthday and then live on the state.
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:45, Reply)
I'd be the same to be honest.
You can't trust these corrupt darkie nations.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:40, Reply)
It's a bit different wearing a poppy to respect those who have died fighting for our country than wearing a ribbon because a couple of gay fellas fucked a monkey then couldn't be bothered to rubber up.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:30, Reply)
I heard it was brewed in a Government lab.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:31, Reply)
No it was gay monkey fuckers, deffo.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:32, Reply)
you always speak for the silent majority xx

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:31, Reply)
When are you lot ever silent about anything?

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:33, Reply)
shut the fuck up, bumboy

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:34, Reply)
I'll shut you up with my swinging man meat in a minute.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:35, Reply)
It's Doozer, please amend to NOT meat.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:36, Reply)
He ent no veggie. He loves a meat injection.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:39, Reply)
I knew you'd get that wrong. The Dozer meme, among others, is that people don't meet him.
It was a clever play on words that, as usual, missed your head by the length of both dozers feet*



* he has big feet
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:42, Reply)
Jason's a bit thick.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:43, Reply)
Bless him, he tries hard

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:44, Reply)
yer but he gets it wrong every time

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:45, Reply)
It's hard work, sure, but he's worth it.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:45, Reply)
nah, don't like that one.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:44, Reply)

like get
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:48, Reply)
Bumming makes you deaf apparently.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:47, Reply)
what?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:48, Reply)
plus two veg

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:42, Reply)
I will not be drawn in by the gay agenda, it's a gay disease after all.
I'm just saying what we are all thinking.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:34, Reply)
oh baby you always do xx

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:34, Reply)
^^ Fucking bender

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:35, Reply)
don't bungle my jungle you little mo

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:36, Reply)
Pissed off is too strong a word.
Bemused?
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:30, Reply)
That duckface needs some work.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:28, Reply)
it wasn't a funeral

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:29, Reply)
Tomato, tomatoe.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:46, Reply)
I wasn't really arsed either.
What you all been doing?
Not whining on here all day I hope.
Anyone invented anything since yesterday?
Anyone wrote a play or owt?
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:53, Reply)
Just off to an open night mic mate.
I've decided to not participate, just watch, and possibly complain.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:55, Reply)
You will tell us the best jokes tomorrow won't you?

(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:06, Reply)
And explain them all to Jay

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:11, Reply)
Think it'll be all music.
I can sing you something if you want?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:11, Reply)
I have done a fair bit of whinging today cos I feel horrible and the last two days have been shit. Sorry.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 19:56, Reply)
We actually haven't noticed Frogcock.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:00, Reply)
No one cares! :(

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:02, Reply)
You seen a doctor?
No, only spots.
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:07, Reply)
It's nearly all self inflicted.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:08, Reply)
Pervert.

(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:09, Reply)
I can't help it! It's addictive!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:10, Reply)
The fucking onanist.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:12, Reply)
Oh yeah, I had a pizza that used barbecue sauce instead of tomato. It's a taste sensation!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:04, Reply)
That sounds appalling

(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:33, Reply)
It was a happy accident at the ordering stage.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:34, Reply)
Ah, I see
You went for the colouring-in menu did you?
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:36, Reply)
No.
I went for a meatza and didn't read it, you sarcastic spastic.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:41, Reply)
sarcastic spastic is a nice-sounding phrase

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:42, Reply)
I know. I enjoyed that too.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:43, Reply)
Your face sounds appalling, and so does YM.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:34, Reply)
It's a taste sensation!

(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:38, Reply)
YD is a taste sensation

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:43, Reply)
DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY!
I hope Bono didn't have to wait long in the queue to get in, he's earnt his seat at the top table.
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:33, Reply)
tell you what is disrespectful at a funeral
moonwalking by the grave singing "I'm bad! I'm bad! you know I'm bad!" just after the coffin's been laid to rest
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:53, Reply)
Or doing graveside Karaoke to the Bee gee's "Staying Alive"

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:55, Reply)
Well typical
I turn up just as everyone else has fucked off....Forever Kronley
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 20:54, Reply)
i'm here for you, hh

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:07, Reply)
*waves*
Hey hey Cavy, no trip to mother Russia this year?
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:12, Reply)
no :(
perhaps an adventure next year though, perhaps iceland or morrocco
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:16, Reply)
You have to watch out for Chavs at Iceland

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:21, Reply)
i went to one the other day
and there were no crispy pancakes. The staff were wonderfully cheerful, though
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:32, Reply)
Findus crispy pancakes
Bloody hell do people still buy them?
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:38, Reply)
YM went to Iceland
She grabbed some to cool her ringpiece.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:43, Reply)
So your story is my Mum has a hot bum?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:44, Reply)
Well she certainly has a prawn ring.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:45, Reply)
Wait she don't even like jewellery

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:54, Reply)
i went to morrooco this year
it's how I imagine a hot nuclear winter to look
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:07, Reply)
That's because you're cheater who lies to his wife.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:09, Reply)
Errrrrmmmmm...... maybe I should get tips from someone who still has a marriage

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:11, Reply)
Alright Hare.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:16, Reply)
#Bear&Hare
Yeah, good as gold, good as gold ta, you?
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:19, Reply)
Me me

(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:17, Reply)
Look were all grown ups here Ed
You don't have to put your hand up every time you want to go to the toilet
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:20, Reply)
These days I'm lucky if I get up
before I go to the toilet.
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:24, Reply)
Or, better than that, someone who is happier without one.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:18, Reply)
Have you got custody of the shed yet?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:21, Reply)
your ex wife then

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:22, Reply)
Of course.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:23, Reply)
i'm at work
been here since 7.15am

left here at about 3am yesterday

my life sucks
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:38, Reply)
Shut up you fat mess.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:39, Reply)
Did you try it on with Swipe on Sunday?
The jungle drums have been busy
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:41, Reply)
Do you mind? I'm just about to have supper.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:42, Reply)

upper wipe and you might have ruined my chances of getting some tonight
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:44, Reply)
Errgh.
Frogster is the one hanging out of the back of it.

The poor, deluded, sod.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:45, Reply)
eew poor frogsy

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:46, Reply)
Another one trapped in the spiders web?.....where will it all end?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:48, Reply)
depressing sex and ignore 2.0

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:50, Reply)
YOU FORGOT THE FLOUNCING ASPECT OF IT ALL
Poor old Monty 4evainrhertz
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:51, Reply)
But you do at least get to charge the punter by the hour????
tee-hee
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:40, Reply)
Just got back from some work based festive food thing.
Ha! Two pints and then the offski. No hangover is mine.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:41, Reply)
Work related 'festive' shit is shit.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:41, Reply)
Work outings and drink almost never end well
well done you
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:42, Reply)
haha yeah
My work had ours on Friday and it was fucking carnage.

Two girls puked all over the MD. This was about 7:30 or so.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:47, Reply)
Yeah your face has that effect on most females

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:49, Reply)
so does tequila slammers at teatime

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:51, Reply)
I had one bad experience at a Christmas do when I was younger
From that day forward I have always alternated between alcohol and soft drinks

#lightweight
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:53, Reply)
seriously, I wouldn't be surprised if next year's one was a sit down meal with only one glass of wine allowed

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:56, Reply)
Yeah, we have a video of you at your Christmas party

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:58, Reply)
Dozer is the ginger one on the right with the Sk8ter gear on

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 21:59, Reply)
hoodies =/= skate gear

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:00, Reply)
^ Ginger ^

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:02, Reply)
guess your lot just can't handle your drink
shame
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:08, Reply)
it was embarrassing

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:11, Reply)
Well I'm outta Hare* laters
*play on words
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:04, Reply)
Snog, shag, kill
Go
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:05, Reply)
This would be better as a new thread.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:07, Reply)
Well you can thread off.
It's bo boze time
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 10 Dec 2013, 22:12, Reply)

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