Good afternoon sexy internet pals*
I'm having a pulled beef (is that a thing?) roast spuds and veg filled large yorkshire pudding for dinner tonight. How about you?

Alt: I'm thinking about deleting my facebook account. I barely check it anymore and when I do it's just people reminiscing about their old facebook posts. What are you thinking about ending/getting rid of?


*Yeah, yeah, best case scenario alright? Please don't ruin it with pictures you hideous troggs
( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:13, 158 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

It is important to announce these things publicly first.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:14, Reply)

You're one of those simpering meatwrongs aren't you Bluey?
How come they've got the cash to have a Mo Farrah fronted advertising campaign yet are still unable to make a Quorn chilli look even vaguely appetising? And yes, it is your fault.
( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:19, Reply)

Dunno, are you talking about some ready meal?
That could be why.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:24, Reply)

he will be summoning the energy to reply

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:24, Reply)

I seem to have just a little more energy than you

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:29, Reply)

You can get rid of the chilli bit

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:24, Reply)

Oh hello!
McBeef wants you to pull his spuds.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:16, Reply)

Won't that hurt?

( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:17, Reply)

FUCK YEAH!
SEXY HURT!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:19, Reply)

I think you need to go and lie down for a bit

( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:20, Reply)

depends on the mood, really.
A gentle tug is nice.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:21, Reply)

what about pulling one down twelve inches and then swinging the other around it like a fleshy bolas?

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:37, Reply)

I'll tell you when im your age

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:21, Reply)

Link us up to your facebook account and we'll tell you if it's worth keeping or not

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:17, Reply)

Here you go..
www.facebook.com/rhyltruckdriver
( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:28, Reply)

Not clicking that probably a virus

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:30, Reply)

It's so annoying
I've got a ton of bikini pictures on there and I can't quite figure out the privacy settings :((((
( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:37, Reply)

Not into fat chicks, soz

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:38, Reply)

Sounds like you've stalked the wrong person, Stalky McStalkerpants

( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:42, Reply)

POIDH

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

That's nice dear
Remember to wipe your bum
( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:59, Reply)

I really haven't put that much thought into it yet, I've not had Chilli cheese fries for awhile I may have that.
Alt: My terrible kitchen lies Lolz
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:17, Reply)

hiya!!!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:18, Reply)

Hi!

( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:20, Reply)

hiya!!!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:18, Reply)

..and again!

( Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:20, Reply)

I was thinking about buying a jar of
peanut butter and heading down to Battersea.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:18, Reply)

don't use the crunchy stuff for lube
just sayin'
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:19, Reply)

*taps nose*

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:24, Reply)

+ dogs home

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:19, Reply)

TTJYT

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:23, Reply)

ouch :(

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:26, Reply)

Do it with a really good, preferably really right-wing flounce.
Something like "Kill all the muslims/Jews/gays/blacks" and when someone objects, answer with "WHY AREN'T I ALLOWED MY OWN OPINIONS?!?!?!?!!!" (preferably with terrible spelling), followed with a couple of updates about how SOME PEOPLE don't like you expressing YOUR OWN VIEWS or similar, and then how you've been crying all night, and then how you're going to delete, "reel frendz no who n ware i am".

THEN delete.

Please.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:18, Reply)

Better idea: -
Change your name to that of someone you don't like with a lot of mutual friends, and remove them as a friend. Delete all personal information and remove all of your pictures.

Post the IS flag as your new profile picture and insert some of their personal photo's in the albums, and post lots of jihadist stuff about how you intend to kill westerners.
( Muns, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:28, Reply)

Extra effective just before that person goes on holiday to Turkey.

( Muns, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:29, Reply)

I don't know but I'd like to go to the cool nonce branch of nandos and have chicken and chips
Alt: My job, my house, my b3ta account.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:23, Reply)

You're planning on becoming swipe's houseboy?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:25, Reply)

the question was 'thinking about' not 'planning' you stupid idiot, no one's said anything about planning

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:27, Reply)

He won his way in to her life with his "amplesponge skillz"

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:27, Reply)

YOU DONT KNOW FUCK ALL ABOUT ME MAYTE

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:29, Reply)

haha

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:30, Reply)

:)

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:31, Reply)

Quorn chilli
Alt: I'm considering, I'm considering
A move to Memphis, a move to Memphis
I'm considering, I'm considering
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:32, Reply)

did I mention I used to live in Memphis?
Have I mentioned it before?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:35, Reply)

Dunno who you are, soz

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:36, Reply)

did you put on a single blue suede shoe before boarding the plane?

( Peej, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:38, Reply)

Careful
You'll get stepped for that
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:39, Reply)

WHY!

( Peej, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:41, Reply)

because shoe, fuckstick

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:43, Reply)

i'm hopping, i'm hopping
1 foot off of Beale.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

With Lighty's girlfriend, right?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:38, Reply)

Oh has lighty got a girlfriend
That's the sort of thing you would think he might mention once in a while
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:47, Reply)

I'm just a very private person
I very rarely get my cock out at b4shes for example
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:21, Reply)

totes, mersh.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

Chicken in some sauce, what ever I make really
Alt. the bodies hahahahaLoledgywakki
( Peej, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:40, Reply)

Good afternoon Ms
Tonight I will be eating chops 'n chips. Big fucking lamb ones

Alt:
I'm thinking about ending a number of colleagues lives in a mouse related massacre incident
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:40, Reply)

*chop twin greasy fist bumps*

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:42, Reply)

Oh yeah

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:43, Reply)

might throw away these shoes

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:41, Reply)

Get rid of those too small Converse while you're at it, yeah?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:43, Reply)

So are you saying he should have
" A little less conversation"




*sorry*
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:48, Reply)

NEVER!

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

I have shoe woes
My sole is coming away on my trainers
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:44, Reply)

sounds like cobblers

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

Sounds like a job for SuperGlueMan

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

he's got a face like a cobblers thumb

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

like a burglars dog

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:51, Reply)

dahn sarf, we say robbers dog.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:55, Reply)

I think my favourite one is a zookeeper's boot

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:58, Reply)

Boxer chewing a bag of wasps

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:10, Reply)

A bulldog licking piss off a thistle

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:11, Reply)

trainer chat

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

which ones are they

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

what you gonna get

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

why have you only got one pair

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

whats wrong with you

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

I only have two feet, hence I only need one pair at a time
/bullyingofstunned
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:51, Reply)

I've lost my left sock
I only fucking had it an hour ago. I've probably eaten it in a fucking Alzheimer's moment
(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:10, Reply)

How the fuck can you lose a sock?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:11, Reply)

I DON'T FUCKING KNOW
I can't even blame the wife and kids cos they're not here. If I find it tucked into the arse of my pants or something I'm putting myself in a home.
(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:15, Reply)

I'm probably fucking wearing it or something.

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:15, Reply)

it's OK it's on the bed somebody obviously sneaked in and moved it

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:16, Reply)

Just take the other one off and throw it away and no one need ever know

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:15, Reply)

I'm not wearing them.
I'm losing my marbles but not quite that fast.
(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:17, Reply)

officelol

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:16, Reply)

Gotta catch em all

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

I have a puncture

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

punct midge
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:51, Reply)

This means nothing to me

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:51, Reply)

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:52, Reply)

officelol

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:54, Reply)

hahahaha

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:56, Reply)

but it brought tears to your eyes

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:53, Reply)

no sex for you then

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:51, Reply)

I know
I'm married
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:52, Reply)

Oi

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:53, Reply)

#terriblebullyingofhh

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:54, Reply)

I've been bullied enough for one day

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:56, Reply)

UNPOSSIBLE

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 15:58, Reply)

We'll be the ones to decide that.

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

YEAH BITCH!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:02, Reply)

I'm having something with mussels tonight as I got some cheap.
I don't know what yet, I'll let you all know later.

I'm throwing out clothes left and right if that's what you mean.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:02, Reply)

My favourite mussels recipe
1 x tin of chopped tomato
2 x chopped chilli
1 x can of lager
parsley
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:06, Reply)

You what?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:07, Reply)

My favourite mussels recipe
1 x tin of chopped tomato
2 x chopped chilli
1 x can of lager
parsley
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:09, Reply)

Oh right

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:09, Reply)

that sounds pretty awful

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:09, Reply)

Its actually really really nice
I saw it on "The Best" ages ago
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:10, Reply)

do you cook the tomatoes first because uncooked tinned tomatoes are rank as fuck

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:11, Reply)

Yeah, you chuck all the ingredients in and bring it up to the boil
then bin the mussels in. It sounds rank but its fucking lovely
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:13, Reply)

mussels in lager?
urgh.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:23, Reply)

it's a pretty standard Belgian dish
only without the horrid tinned tomatoes
(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:24, Reply)

I'm guessing the Belgians don't use Carling though?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:25, Reply)

Actually, would it even make much difference if you're boiling it?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:26, Reply)

They aint no goddam Carling in mah crib, mofo

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:26, Reply)

prolly stella
that's their cooking lager
(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:30, Reply)

I just dont really do lager.
I'll douse mine in gin.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:30, Reply)

Actually. i don't like mussels either.
Pass, go to the next one.

wait, what are we doing?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:38, Reply)

I assume you just drink the lager
and throw the rest in the bin
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:11, Reply)

no mussels?

(old man river possible lesbian, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:07, Reply)

No

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:08, Reply)

I may give this a try... maybe.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:19, Reply)

I had some done with a thai green curry type sauce a while ago
They were amazing
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:20, Reply)

What's wrong with a bit of onion, cream, wine and parsley?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:22, Reply)

Nothing at all
Just giving a potential alternative
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:25, Reply)

Cheap mussels.
Nope, can't see any potential risks here.
( Kroney, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:32, Reply)

I got stuff from the Port of Lancaster smokehouse. Facebook is alright for messenger a d that's it really.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:27, Reply)

I have leftover pizza
Waste not want not.

Alt: Most of my facebook is like /links only interesting, so I'll stick around. Thinking about getting rid of my gym membership since I never go.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Jan 2015, 16:31, Reply)