Morning you lot!


How are we all today???? :D
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:17, 237 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

hungover
But that's normal.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:24, Reply)

Morning you's two
Hope you had a nice birthday VC - kiddo and I spent her birthday baking bread, making garlic bread and cooking awesome mac cheese :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:31, Reply)

aww thanks no3l!
I had a great birthday actually - it was really nice. spent the day with my friends. Sounds like your kiddo had a good day too :P

and LiC - I think one day I'm going to have to come on here with a hangover just so I can go "I have one too so nerr."
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:32, Reply)

It's not worth it
trust me.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:37, Reply)

ahaha yeah
well my last hangover left me so ill I was still vomming when I got to the airport 36 hours after I got drunk.

I don't enjoy being *that* hungover.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:41, Reply)

Morning all,
Glad you had a good birthday weekend VC :)

Sorry to hear about the hangover Light.

*waves at No3l*
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 7:53, Reply)

It's not my first hangover
And I doubt it will be my last :)

I'm off to work - catch you all in a bit.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:08, Reply)

Morning all
I didn't sleep much last night. Woke up after about 90 minutes sleep at the noise of something falling over in a cupboard or something and couldn't sleep for hours afterwards.

So I'm all dozy this morning. Mind you, I'm always a bit dozy so you probably won't notice.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:17, Reply)

hey Lab, K2
How's it going?

K2 - I'm like that too - your 11am is like my midnight so I'm usually a bit slow on the replies around then.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:21, Reply)

At least
you can go to bed now V-cat. I have a day's work ahead of me :-(

Other than that though, things are hunky dory.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:22, Reply)

Morning K2
I've been in work since 7am, and I already don't want to be here. So very tired.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:23, Reply)

dang
well if it makes you feel better I'm attempting to study maths so I don't fail my first test tomorrow.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:26, Reply)

Morning all
It looks a bit snowy outside today, but I get the feeling it's just going to be annoyingly slushy underfoot. Oh well. Wrapped up warm I shall be!
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:34, Reply)

Still no snow here
There are a couple of flakes falling just now, but it's not exactly going to make a difference.

We've been really (un)lucky* with the snow this year. Hardly had a covering.

*delete as applicable
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:35, Reply)

Slush?
we have sleet here sometimes. :(
I don't like sleet. Sleet is not cold enough to be snow - and too wet to be just rain.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:37, Reply)

The snow here
Has frozen solid. As have the roads. It made the journey into work interesting, despite the White Van Man trying to change the CD in my car with the front of his van.

I hate people who drive so damn close.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:39, Reply)

eeep
sounds scary.

I don't even like people driving close when the weather's good. freaks me out.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:57, Reply)

Morning all
Very foggy here and raining a bit, apparently we might get a load more snow tonight.

Heard some news on the radio about the bush fires VC and thought of you!

Anyone watch the Six Nations at the weekend?
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 8:59, Reply)

yeah they're on the other side
of the state for the most part -
but there was a massive one about an hour and a half away from my town today - ripped through a small town of about 500 people.

there are 114 people dead and the number is still rising.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:04, Reply)

For all that
the weather in Britain is crap, at least we're spared from extremes. It's never excessively hot or cold for any significant period, we get no proper hurricanes and few serious tornadoes, there's never drought on the scale of hot countries and the country's geologically stable.

I can only imagine what havoc the bushfires are wreaking in Oz just now.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:09, Reply)

It's as though
Everybody who owns a car decided to go for a drive, nick the parking spaces in the multi storey and then cover the overflow car park in ice.

I had to get my shovel out and scrape the car park so that I could park...
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:10, Reply)

That's grim VC
Puts ourCaptain V's moaning about a little snow into perspective.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:11, Reply)

Thanks LiC
You're right though. Ever so slightly manic at the moment so I'm incredibly moany and arrogant which is starting to piss me off as it's holding me, the greatest of all the people, back.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:16, Reply)

as I've said earlier
the worst part is knowing that some of the huge fires were deliberately lit.
Someone out there has caused the deaths of who knows how many out of those 114+ dead people.
It sickens me.
We've donated a bunch of clothes and foodstuffs and money to the disaster centres but the shit that's on the news just makes me want to hurl. it's horrific.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:18, Reply)

*grins*
Couldn't resist.
EDIT: to clarify, I couldn't resist editing my post, not setting a bunch of fires in Oz.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:19, Reply)

It's pretty cuntish, isn't it
I'm the first to admit I've got a healthy arsonist streak (well, I am a boy!) but I don't see how people could find it fun to burn random people to death by lighting bush fires.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Can I have some of your manicness please Captain?
It's not even half nine and I've already had about three people in my office. I keep telling them I'm closed til 12 on Mondays but they won't listen.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:23, Reply)

Manic-ness is awesome.
I got to Wales and back fine, no snow-problems.

Had a great time too, was really funny, Welsh people are really friendly.
And for some reason most of 'em haven't ever seen Lucky Strike cigarettes before.
*laughs*
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:29, Reply)

well
I have a healthy arsonist streak myself - but I would never do something along those lines.

EDIT: hi kaol! :) I'm going to wales. and what are Lucky Strikes?
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:30, Reply)

I'd gladly give you some
But it's not that easy. I know of great ways to stop mania dead in it's tracks (at least it worked for me) but not induce it (unless you're bipolar).

I've also got about a months worth of meds that have the side effect of sexytime godliness left over from the time the doctors thought it'd be a good idea to try anti-depressants with somebody they suspected to be bipolar.

Shouldn't be too bitter about that though because the side effect was amazing!
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:31, Reply)

I don't think your sample size is enough to write the whole principality off as non Lucky smokers ;)
Had a good time though?

When are you coming to Wales VC?

Edit: yeah I'm not sure I can induce it apart from by taking amphetamines or something Cap'n, which I don't want to do at work! Sadly my brand of mentalness doesn't lead to any gains in efficiency.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:32, Reply)

Mornng All
Hope you all had a good one, I didn't.

Vamp, did you gave a good birthday?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:35, Reply)

Sam
sometime late next year.

Dok - I had a lovely birthday thank you - really enjoyable.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:38, Reply)

Lucky Strikes
Are a brand of cigarettes, Ms Vampy.

Where're you planning on going in Wales?
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:39, Reply)

If I'm anywhere near Wales then
we can have a Wales bash!

I'm owed a holiday in Australia as well, I've been promised the use of a holiday house when I want it, just need to afford the flights out there. Can't remember where it is in Australia though...
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:39, Reply)

eh well I'm staying with a b3tard when I get to the UK
so I might just get them to come with and we'll have a christmas bash :P
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:40, Reply)

I like Wales
I like bashes. I like the sound of a Wales bash.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:41, Reply)

Well,
That sounds good to me.
Wales is funny :D
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:42, Reply)

You're funny

( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:45, Reply)

So's your face.

( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:46, Reply)

I could do Wales
It's not too far for me.
I just booked the afternoon off - yay!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:47, Reply)

I've never been
so I wouldn't know.

What do you mean by "funny"?

EDIT: I don't know how far wales is from where this b3tards place is. I just know I'd like to go to wales if I can lol.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:48, Reply)

But I like my face, it makes me laugh
VC most the bashes involving OT folk happen in Londonium which is about 3 hours drive from Cardiff (which is where I expect a Wales bash would happen).
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:52, Reply)

Wales
I don't like it.

Spent far too many weekends up to my neck in mud there.

And I almost went to uni in Cardif as well.

Vamp, glad you had a good one.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:52, Reply)

Sam!
Good win over the Scots but did you see us beating France!

YES! YES! AND MORE YES!

COME ON IRELAND!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:53, Reply)

London 3 hours drive from Cardiff?!
Which way do you go?

Wales is good, well for a day trip anyway. Wouldn't recommend living here...

@ baz - yeah that was a helluva game, certainly better than the England match... I don't think you were 9 points better than France (they lost it a bit with their 5 forced subs in the last 20 mins) but definitely deserved the victory.

Wales - Ireland for the Grand Slam decider on Super Saturday I reckon!!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 9:59, Reply)

that's a game for the ages, that one.
Wales are the form team but Ireland are resurgent at the moment and the Leinster back line is irresistible.

EDIT: With all due respect to our English friends, fuck John Inverdale with his, "Just how many points do you think we'll beat Italy today".

No other nation on earth would have the hubris to assume the outcome of a game.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:02, Reply)

Sam
Along the M4.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:03, Reply)

Should I enter this in the QOTW?
A SQL query walks into a bar and sees two tables. He goes over to them and says, "Can I join you?"
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:04, Reply)

Light in Chains
no

re: my Winchester trip the other day. Took me 6 fucking hours to get back to Exeter.

I blame idiot drivers and the shit roads more than the snow
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:10, Reply)

Moanings all
How the devil are we today?

I've still got 5 days til I get my Valentine's present to myself *sighs* :(
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:12, Reply)

*spangs*
T'was funny but deserves a good spanging regardless.

In other news - for the first time ever I'm actually bothering to write to my local MP regarding this: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7877182.stm

I've (finally) concluded that if I'm going to moan about the hair brained schemes the government comes up with I should at least lobby my local MP to oppose them.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:15, Reply)

Mornin all
I've had a great weekend. I'm covered in injuries and I can't remember much after 2am. I hope I didn't do anything too bad.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:19, Reply)

Hmm...
A weekend without injuries is like a roast without gravy.
Still good, but missing that extra bit of excitement.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:22, Reply)

Yes baz
Every time they went to Josh Lewsey on the touchline for an opinion he appeared to be watching a completely different game! The Italians gave them all the tries, and if they'd played that scrum half instead of Bergamasco from the start then I don't think England would have won. Shocking performance from England, don't think they managed to get a third phase all game!

Roll on next weekend, hopefully plenty of the chinless public school pricks will get their heads caved in...

France, Ireland and Wales are all looking strong to me, although France are a game down already. I'm still calling Wales to win it, although obviously I'm a bit biased ;)

And re. our game, why the hell did they let the Scots right wing play on after he sparked himself out? Dangerous decision...

Edit: moaning Ethel & roota!

@ Captain - definitely, another insidious move towards the database state....

(*is a fully paid up NO2ID member*)
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:24, Reply)

Roota
Well there was that one thing!

Kaol, I like to keep my weekend injury free, doesn't always work though.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:24, Reply)

6 Nations
I don't care about the result as long as Wales don't win.

I like Wales and the Welsh, but the attitude to rugby disgusts me, they are the worst losers and the worst winners in the world.

Worse even than the Aussies
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:25, Reply)

KO's
What a game for knockouts though!

2 in 20 minutes!

You would have to wait a whole hour to see that many in UFC!

And a more perfectly executed knee to the temple, you would only dream of in K1!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:26, Reply)

you know you're right
I don't like australians when it comes to sports. it shames me to say that I am one.

namely cos I let the whole country down when it comes to sports involving coordination....
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:29, Reply)

@Sam
I'm going to have to look more into NO2ID me thinks. Somebody made an interesting comment on slashdot about the bbc story stating that anybody who wants to conceal their travelling habits merely needs to make their journeys via a stop in a different country and that database is fucked. My initial problems with it (practicality wise) were due to the general lameness of the e-passports.

And I hope the irony of me misspelling harebrained wasn't lost on any of you =p
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:32, Reply)

It was brilliant
Especially since both the knockouts were the Scots players fault! Got to love Martin Williams getting up after the first one as if nothing had happened, then 20 minutes later going over to hit the second bloke before he realised he was already unconscious!

@ Vipros - eh? The Welsh are very passionate about rugby yeah, I wouldn't say we're worse losers than anyone else though. It's the national sport in Wales so everyone gets into it, unlike England where it's the sport of public school educated cunts and people who drive to Twickenham in their Range Rovers. Different game entirely.

@ Captain, yeah, I have two issues with it, one being what are they doing recording such data in the first place, and the second being I don't trust them not to lose a memory stick with the data on, or fuck up the database! The lack of ID cards will be (I can't believe I'm saying this) the one good thing about the Tories getting in at the next election. I will refuse to carry an ID card though whatever the punishment.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:33, Reply)

Is there rugby on at the moment?
I hadn't noticed.
Captain V - try theyworkforyou.com to write your MP.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:39, Reply)

yeah, rugby - it's a gentleman's game..
Another interesting aspect of that game was the kicking. Stephen Jones had a nightmare and Chris Patterson couldnt miss.

The scoreline could have been vastly different.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:41, Reply)

I pray
that it's not on CCTV.
I had mucshy peas on my roast yesterday. I hate it when they seep into the gravy.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:43, Reply)

Sam
Would you refuse even if we get to the point where not carrying and ID card causes you to become unidentifiable?

I'd be less opposed to it if a) They could give me a good reason for the data being useful b) Their system wasn't so easily circumventable c) They had a track record of not being retards with data and security

Based on how much stick government schemes involving any sort of IT seem to get so quickly from technically inclined folks I wonder whether the government employs 10 year olds to do their IT work or whether they simply choose to ignore the outcry from their own experts who are being asked to work miracles, can't and are then told to cut corners.

:edit: Thanks for that LiC, looks like an excellent website. Not much of a fan of democracy but it's several orders better than pseudo democracy. Looks like the people behind (and supporting) that website are trying to help us have a proper one. Hooray.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:45, Reply)

Yeah, Jones did have a poor one kicking wise
Did you see the state of the pitch though? Absolutely shocking before they started. Got to remember Paterson is the most accurate kicker in Test rugby as well.

And I'd still rather have Jones than Captain Chinny, he's a much solider pair of hands. Hook does the flashy stuff but hasn't got the basics nailed nearly as well. And we can always let Halfpenny kick.

@ Captain - yes, up to and including any convictions for same. It's something that I really feel that strongly about. It will not help track crime and terrorists, it will just inconvenience law abiding citizens (I consider myself one of those these days!). As I said above I don't believe they have any right or reason to retain the data, and that's without considering the fact that they're going to fuck it up when they do implement it. It's based on biometrics that haven't been trialled in the real world, and as with every other government IT job (passport office, NHS database, air traffic thing) it's going to be programmed by retards, ten years past schedule and fifteen times the budget. I would have no confidence at all that, for instance, when I presented my ID card at the doctors for treatment that they would not be able to see my criminal record due to a fuck up on the system.

The NO2ID website has a much better worded explanation of why it's such an appalling idea, check it out. Well worth a look.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:47, Reply)

Sam
I agree with you entirely but I wouldn't give my life for it! I'd probably leave the country, permanently, as soon as possible if I thought I'd do an involuntary disappearing act for not carrying an ID card with me (or thought such a situation was inevitable).
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 10:57, Reply)

Not sure I'd give my life for it
But I'd certainly go to court to prove the point...

This country is becoming more like Soviet East Germany by the day. And hardly anybody seems to give a fuck, that's the scary thing. Reality TV and Heat magazine are the new opiates of the people.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:03, Reply)

I'd get a few fake ID Cards.
T'would be easy enough to fake the digital data on 'em.
And as for the printed stuff, not too bad apart from any hologram stuff.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:05, Reply)

People are stupid and they deserve to die
and there are too many of them and all this namby-pamby shit about people being born equal and having equal right needs to be eradicated.

Incidentally, many of our more democratic European neighbours have long since had a system of identity cards in place.

They're nifty if you forget your passport.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:07, Reply)

That's the thing
Whatever technology they come up with, somebody will be able to fake it. And biometrics are NOT secure. You can fake out fingerprint scanners with gummi bears for fuck's sake!

As with anything like this, it's the law abiding that will suffer.

Edit: yes baz a lot of European countries have ID cards. But none of them use biometrics in the same way we're planning to, or retain nearly the same amount of data in the national database. Saying I'm against ID cards is sort of a shorthand way of saying it's the proposed database state I object to. Have a look at no2id.org and see what they're planning, it's completely different to most of the other EU ID card schemes.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:08, Reply)

They're trying to make it an offence
To take pictures of police officers too. Why they think these things are a good idea when nobody wants them is a mystery.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:09, Reply)

The trouble with this country is
that even if people do try and do something about what this shitty government are doing, nothing happens anyway. No2ID are doing what they can, but will it make a difference?

A million people protesting in London didn't make them think twice about going to war...

We can't even get the general election that we should have because that one-eyed Scottish idiot (thanks Jez) is grimly holding on to power.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:10, Reply)

A million people is nothing though
There's over 60 million in this country.

The sad fact is that most people don't give a fuck, it doesn't even enter their tiny minds that it could be a bad thing.

We've never had a true fascist government like a lot of Europe has, which is I think a large part of the reason for the tiny left wing radicalist movement in this country, unlike Italy, Spain etc where it's a lot bigger and more organised.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:14, Reply)

Baz
I've never been one to say all people are equal blah blah blah but why should they collect all this information when they people they claim it will be used to stop can so easily circumvent it? It's a huge waste of time and money before we consider how it's going to be ballsed up and the fact that it opens the door for them to quietly pass bills to expand the powers.

It also bothers me greatly that so many things are justified with nothing more than "But we need it to fight terrorism" or "think of the children" and that if you dare question their proposals after they've mentioned one of these you're made to feel like a terrorist sympathiser or a kiddy fiddler.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:14, Reply)

Sam, I'm on your side mate!
I was scoobied during my tenure in France when I had to get one.

All governments are thieves.
The police force are in the employ of thieves.
I honestly dont see the illegality in killing them.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:15, Reply)

Sounds like a reasonable explanation Sam
When both fascists and the radical left are well organised the only way to distance yourself from extremists is to be in the middle ground (the proper middle, not the "middle" that Labour and the Tories are squabbling over). With only one of the two groups well organised it's much easier to position yourself near that extreme because you can spin the opposing extreme to be whatever you want it to be and place yourself between that and the one organised group.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:20, Reply)

Freedom for Tooting!
Sorry. Couldn't resist.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:28, Reply)

@roota
You're showing your age now : )
( girlinthehole, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:33, Reply)

bgb
I know! It's not wrong to have a crush on Wolfie if you're over 30.

Another thing comes to mind too:
"I used to want to plant bombs at the Last Night of the Proms, but now you'll find me with the baby in the bathroom with that big shell, listening for the sound of the sea"
I think my days of lying in the road shouting "Stop the War" may be over. Nobody listens anyway. Or maybe I'm just tired and hungover...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:37, Reply)

One of the scariest things about the recession
is the amount of support it will generate for the BNP et al. They will do a very good job of spinning all the problems and blaming them on immigrants, darkies, liberals, etc etc. They will almost certainly gain more seats in the next election.

Edit: Billy Bragg isn't it roota, nice!!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:39, Reply)

OK
I'm up for joining the Tootong Popular Front.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Yup, westminster needs firebombing
On the day I retire, I'm taking all the pension money the thieving scumbags have been nicking and I'm strapping as much semtex to my body as I can buy and I'm walking into Dail Eireann (Irish parliament) and taking out as many of the bastards as I can.

Roll on 2050 (assuming 65 is still the legal retirement age and the scumbags dont make us work any longer).


EDIT: 2040. I cant bloody add I'm so hungover.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:40, Reply)

I'll join ya baz
Direct action is the only way forward left for us.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:41, Reply)

Indeed Sam
it blooming well is Braggy.
I can't belive how many usually sane people are coming out with BNP-lite comments. It's filtering through.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:43, Reply)

Darkies
Yeah, but what did they ever do for us?

All this equality for women and foreign types shit - what do I get out of it?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:45, Reply)

If only I'd carried on with my degree
I'd certainly be able to come up with some creative ideas for manufacturing explosive materials...
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:47, Reply)

Explosives are no problem V, I will get some from my local quarry
@ baz - they invented reggae, and they taught us how to dance. Surely that's enough?

And a big hello to all the members of the police and MI5 who are now reading this thread. *waves*
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:49, Reply)

V
They're not hard at all to make, it's the delivery system that can cause a headache.

I still think gunpowder under the place would work wonders.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:50, Reply)

roota
I agree about the BNP-lite comments. My mother said yesterday how disgusted she was that some councils/companies want to turn Christmas into The Winter Festival, so as not to offend non-Christians.

I had to point out to her that it was invented by the media, and that, to my knowledge, no company or council has ever 'banned Christmas'.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:51, Reply)

or
Fairy Liquid in all their watertanks, then have a mass coordinated flush.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:52, Reply)

and Kebabs
although that might have been the Greeks.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:52, Reply)

Explosives are fun!
I found out that we've got 5 kilos of powdered aluminimum in the lab here...
So, I just need a bit of rust... *grins*

No quite an explosive, but fuckin' awesome all the same!
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:52, Reply)

Greeks are dark
so you're ok
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:53, Reply)

Haha
Thermite mix with 5kg of aluminium will be fairly impressive!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:53, Reply)

Baz
If anybody ever opposes you just quote the old testament to them. Leviticus 27:3 - 7 puts a monetary value on different people based on age and sex.

Those verses can also be interpreted as saying that children under a month old (or unborn) have no value and therefore abortions are ok...
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:54, Reply)

Er...
"fairly impressive"?

Sod off, it'll be brighter than the Sun!

I'm tempted to make lots of small thermite capsules. About 100g of mix in each.
Oh, anyone know what the best Al:FeO ratio is, by the way?
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:56, Reply)

Kaol
Steel wool, left in water. Loads of rust.

You may even have some of that hanging about.

EDIT well the equation for it is;
Fe₂O₃ + 2Al = 2Fe + Al₂O₃ + Heat

So a 2 parts Aluminium to 1 part iron oxide mix.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 11:57, Reply)

thanks Cap!
I find my argument is better though.

Muslims - what did they ever do for me?
Jews - what did they ever do for me?
Women - what did they ever do for me (that I couldnt pay for)?
Foreign types - what did they ever do for me?
People and their fucking children - what did they ever do for me?
Fucking scrawny starving Africans on television - what did they ever do for me?

Basically, anyone I'm supposed to be considerate of or give a shit about gets asked the same question?

I am completely selfish.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:00, Reply)

Steel wool?
Fuckin' nice idea!

Ok... So going by a rough approximation you'd want about 2/3 rust to 1/3 Alu.
I think. Maths and Chemistry aren't my strong-point.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:03, Reply)

Well you need a 1:2 molar ratio Kaol
If you're using Fe2O3 which, based on a quick look at wikipedia, rust typically is.

As far as mass is concerned you want a ratio of 160:54 although that's assuming the iron oxide is dry which, if it's come from rust, it wont be.

:edit: Corrected values on account of my retarded chemical equation balancing.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:03, Reply)

Thermite
is a bugger to get going. What you need is some potassium nitrate and something easily flammable, like sugar. Mix them up with your aluminium powder and stick a match in it.

Step back quickly.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:04, Reply)

Kaol
3 rust:1 aluminium has worked for me, just found a website saying 74.7%:25.3% for the correct molar quantities, so that's about right. Won't matter that much if you're not bang on, it just means it won't all react.

Just found this, brilliant!

Edit: haven't they clamped down on KNO₃ though K2? Magnesium ignition's always worked fine for me, you do need quite a lot of it though.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:05, Reply)

Kaol
Half as much rust as aluminium.

K2 a nice long bit of Magnesium ribbon works wonders as a fuse for Thermite.

V, you eveaporate all the water out of the rust first.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:07, Reply)

baz
I'm sure you're not as selfish as my brother. just trust me on this.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:07, Reply)

Hmmm...
How would a turboflame lighter and a thin trail of thermite mix leading to the main pile work?
And sunglasses, obviously.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:09, Reply)

Dok
Blimey I'm being retarded today. Can't balance a simple equation, forgot completely about evaporation, left my glasses at home and I'm sure there'll be more.

*sigh*
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:10, Reply)

You wouldn't get it to light directly with a turboflame
Not hot enough.

Oxy-acetylene torch maybe, if you've got one of those. But magnesium is probably your best option.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:11, Reply)

@Vampyrecat
will do!

Isnt this the best thread ever?

Casual bigotry, anarchy and bombs!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:12, Reply)

Kaol
I'll get you my special gas lighter from work.
It's like a mini blow torch.

Trust me - you'll 'gasm when you see it.

EDIT: baz I totally agree with you.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:13, Reply)

Hmmm...
Where would I go about getting Magnesium from?

I've only got access to arc-welding, not so much use...

EDIT: Vampy, I've got one of them :p
It's in my pocket, right now!
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:14, Reply)

You can
Ignite it with a propane torch, but you run the risk of the whole lot exploding in you face rather than just burning.

V we all have days like that, mine just last longer than most.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:14, Reply)

You can buy it
on eBay!

Or any scientific supplier; it's not really strictly controlled or anything.

Or if you know any secondary school age kids, get them to rob some from the science labs.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:15, Reply)

More than just evaporation required
Most rust is iron hydroxide, and iron (ii) oxide at best, even when dry. To get it as iron (iii) oxide, it's best to roast it in air at high temperature. Then the thermite reaction will work well. If you can light it.

But magnesium is the best bet, agreed.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:16, Reply)

blow-torch
I walked into one as a child and caught fire. I mean, I was ablaze!!
It makes a good family story.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:18, Reply)

@ K2
Electrolysis in salt water will give plenty of Fe(iii)...
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:18, Reply)

@Sam
Yes, but probably the hydroxide rather than the oxide.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:20, Reply)

Roota
I set my hand on fire while cleaning spark plugs, and while I was filling my lighter.

Roasting the rust is easier than electrolysis
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:20, Reply)

Dok
Ouch! How many more burns can you have before you have no fingerprints?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:24, Reply)

you know i would so laugh
if some twunt from The Daily Mail or whatever it is saw this thread and started bleating about it tomorrow.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:24, Reply)

@VC
can we send them a link?

or fake the indignation on behalf of 'concerned internet user/parent' or similar?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:25, Reply)

They've got to be very deep
before they'll burn of fingerprints. It's the scarring that does it. I'm luck I managed to put them out quickly.

EDIT Vamp, it would be funny. And I've just remembered a story for the QOTW.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:26, Reply)

No!
MI5's dossier on me is big enough already....!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:26, Reply)

Well
We'll give MI6 the tip off then!
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:28, Reply)

Baz
only if you want the whole site shut down.

Which would be a fucking shame. So don't. I forbid you. Don't do it. Or else.

PS. I love explosives. Sodium and Water. Fucking awesome stuff.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:28, Reply)

@V-cat
Sodium and water? Bah, boring stuff.

What you really need is potassium and acid...!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:30, Reply)

Dok,
Did I show you the video of the incendiary-pipe-bomb that I made?
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:31, Reply)

k2
I would but they don't give us that at school :(
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:32, Reply)

@ K2
We replaced the chem teacher's beaker of water that he was going to be dropping alkali metals in with one of HCl when he went to photocopy something. Admittedly it was dilute HCl, but still very funny. Entire term of detentions somewhat less so...
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:33, Reply)

Kaol
I'm not sure, don't think so.

Vamp, if you get on well with the chemistry teacher they might.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:34, Reply)

Hmm...
I'll bring my camera to the next bash.
Or figure out how to upload it.

The 30-foot-fireball was good fun.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:35, Reply)

Dilute acid works just fine
You don't need it too concentrated to get the reaction going!

Potassium is a bit more reactive than sodium, but in acid they'll both explode and burn. Potassium looks nicer though, as it burns with a pinkish flame, whereas sodium is bright orangey-yellow (think street lights).
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:35, Reply)

Bah
Trying to find the video I was shown years back by my science teacher of somebody dropping a massive (I think small child size) lump of caesium into a lake (possibly from a plane) but I'm not having any luck so far.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:36, Reply)

ahah
I have trouble concentrating in chemistry. the teacher is very ... er... fit. Enormous tits.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:37, Reply)

That reminds me...
I must put some breadcrumbs out for the sparrows.

Sparrows like breadcrumbs.

Tits like coconuts.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:39, Reply)

*spangs*
You're an awful, awful man, Mr. K.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:41, Reply)

Yes, I know Kaol
My jokes have caused me many spangings over the years.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:42, Reply)

Were they
The saucy sorts of spangings or spangings from internet people with spangpans?
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:44, Reply)

urgh
that's bad.

/mind bleach.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:44, Reply)

Mostly the virtual sort
But I've had my fair share of personal abuse too!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:45, Reply)

Kaol
That'd be cool.

Vamp, I had the same problem in geography, huge mammaries, it was all we could do not to stare at them. The tight tops and no bra didn't help either.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:49, Reply)

oh god
dont make me think about my last teacher (human body and disease lectures oddly enough) who did that.

/wipes drool from lip.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:50, Reply)

Vamp
It doesn't make for a good atmosphere for learning, only ogling tits really.

Still it's good fun.

I've just posted my answer folk, everybody go read it and vote for me. Lemminge for President!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:53, Reply)

All my teachers
Were strange men with crap hair.

We had a physics teacher who rigged up some crazy transformer and made plasma.
But the best thing with him was the time he was using the Van De Graff generator.

He had a massive comb-over, that spanned his head from his right ear, over the top, and was tucked behind his left ear.

Static + Massive comb-over = Serious flapping and lifting action.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Morning all!
Explosives and tits eh? Hmmmmm.... How are you all?
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 12:57, Reply)

Kaol
Well at least it wasn't a fwapping and lifting motion.

Hi Fredz, just watch out for the exploding tits though!

Right off to lunch, I've got to buy music.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:00, Reply)

Dok
I wrote my reply last night. Page Nine. I'll read yours if you read mine.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:03, Reply)

Exploding tits?
That's what? Feeding bluetits baking soda? Tut tut - The RSPB are going to have a fucking field day
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Hi Fredz!
Yep, been an interesting morning's discussion on here!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:42, Reply)

It looks it!
All there needs to be now is mention of famous landmarks or whatever or maybe some famous politician or another and I think this topic will show up on just about every secret service computer thing ever.....
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:49, Reply)

Lets all burn Gordan Brown
And Obama before making love to their wives and children in servitude to Obama Bin Laden.

:edit: What a typo =D
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:52, Reply)

@V
I must be needing glasses - I couldn't quite work out whether you wanted to burn or bum Gordon Brown!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 13:55, Reply)

I'd like to think that was obvious
Regardless of whether or not you can read it properly!

*hides KY jelly*
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:01, Reply)

Aaaaargh
At the moment I'm sat drinking a brew and reading b3ta working on some terribly important code, and somebody keeps ringing me. I am ignoring his calls because I know it's not important and indeed largely irrelevant.

He has rang me about 30 times in the last 10 minutes, so I put my phone on Do Not Disturb. He then rings my colleague, who is also ignoring him, about 30 times. He has now rang someone else in the office next to mine and got them to come in and say '*** is trying to get hold of you'

NO SHIT!

I fucking hate people who do this. Leave a message you cunt! Or send me an email!

I am going to ignore him for the rest of the day and possibly tomorrow as well, if anyone can think of any more suitable punishments* let me know.

*I'm not convinced thermite is gonna be the answer here
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:01, Reply)

@K2
Bum him, then burn him... Oh dear, I think i've been on B3ta too long!
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:02, Reply)

Right
I'm back from lunch with music.

Vamp, I'll read your when I get to it, I'm reading through them now.

V I also read that as bum!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:03, Reply)

r's and n's and m's
are rather confusing in certain fonts.
Marriot hotels often look like they say 'Marmot' from a distance.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:04, Reply)

I've had the heaters on
in my office over lunch, so it's toasty warm now, for a change.

I also just let off a reeking fart. About 20 seconds later, my boss wandered back after lunch.

Oops!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:05, Reply)

SoS
In that situation, I always send them a quick email to say I'm currently working a a big project who requires my own, and my team's, full attention.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:06, Reply)

roota
Marmots rock! They really are great.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:07, Reply)

I reckon
you'd have a laugh if you went out on the town with a marmot. If you couldn't find any welsh girls.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:08, Reply)

It's just so rude!
If I don't answer the phone, it means I'm out of the office or am unable to answer. Cunningly, this is why a little recorded message comes on the phone and says 'Hi this is Sam, unfortunately I'm out of the office or can't answer your call. Please leave a message'

The technology we have these days!

It just does my head in when people can't conceive of you having anything more important to do than answer their call, so they just keep redialling and redialling until I feel like I'm gonna turn into the Incredible Hulk and go on a rampage.

There are about three people who work here who do it every time they ring me. I could get on the phone server and make it impossible for them to ring me, but that'd mean they just came to my office!

(btw - at least once a month I send an email round saying 'if the IT department's phones are on DND, this means they are doing something important, so leave a voicemail'. Which everyone pays attention to, of course)

Edit: he's STILL trying to ring me, I can see it flashing up on the screen even though I'm on DND. I'm really cross now and will have to go for a fag. Shall we take bets on how long it will take him to come up to my office?

(what he doesn't realise is, in this situation, I'm keeping an eye on the corridor CCTV to see him coming up. At which point I will go down the other staircase to the toilet for a 45 minute shit)
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:09, Reply)

Sam
I'd sit and wait. I'd let him come into the office and I'd say "I'm terribly sorry. I'm busy. That's why I didn't answer my phone, and that's why I won't be dealing with you now. Go fuck yourself."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:15, Reply)

Why
Why would you want to go out with a Marmot?

Lemurs are so much better!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:20, Reply)

^that
*sigh* too slow. Was meant to point to roota.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:20, Reply)

Yes V
What about that?

EDIT Yes you were.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:21, Reply)

G'afternoon roota.
I thought of you this morning when I was fighting off two geese with one broom.
Hissy bastards!
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:21, Reply)

2 geese 1 broom
I've seen that video, put me right off my lunch.

Edit: in fact I did see a picture on the internet that sickened me today. And I'm fairly desensitized to that sort of thing.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:22, Reply)

Lemurs
are different. Not better or worse. They both have their merits. Lemurs are more outraged by things though. Marmots let it pass.

V, are you pointing and ridiculing?

EDIT Hiya Kaol. I warned you those geese could turn at any moment...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:22, Reply)

Kaol
Fighting off Geese with a broom, did they attack you?

Lucky it wasn't swans.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:23, Reply)

Roota
What can be better for taking into a pub in the bad part of town, Lemurs. Just because they are more likely to bite somebodies body parts. Like geese and swans.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:25, Reply)

Yeah, they
Were trying to bite me in the legs/nuts.

I'm looking after 'em at the moment, as the people up the road are away on holiday, and I'm "good with animals", according to them.

When I them out of the barn this morning, the two males went for me.

In other animal-related news, I've discovered that the pink bit on the bottom of a cat's paw is the "please slice my finger-tip" button :|
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:28, Reply)

Marmots
would calm any situation with their up-for-it exuberance, coupled with their affable 'let it go, Barry, it's not worth it' nature.
Lemurs get everybody's backs up straight away by permanently looking like someone's shat in their cornflakes, and they're planning revenge. I like the guys, but they can be a liability.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:29, Reply)

kaol
I have a cat-sliced finger too. Very impractical.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:32, Reply)

You shouldn't have
pressed the pink button Kaol
*shakes head*
Anyone could have told you what would happen...
( Mellicious is made of candy, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:32, Reply)

Pffft!
Someone told me it'd be fine, Mel :p
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:33, Reply)

OK Kaol
Ty not to kill them though, you are good with animals you know!

If you do that's diner sorted for a few days.

Roota, well how about bunnies then, they're laid back, but can lash out if the situation arose.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:33, Reply)

Yeah bunnies
Fat ones with long ears.
Not the ones that are almost hares.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:36, Reply)

But
you wondered what it would feel like.
You didn't ask what would happen.
You just need to ask the right questions in future :P
( Mellicious is made of candy, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:36, Reply)

My little sister used to have a Netherland Dwarf
which is a tiny rabbit, about as small as they come.

It was the most vicious thing ever, absolutely evil. Every time I went within a few feet of it it growled at me!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Oh yes
It has to be great big huge ones with big ears, Like General Woundwort in Watership Down.

Hi Mel, long time no see.

EDIT Sam, what did you do to it? Where you naughty?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Dok
That's the very bunny I had in mind
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:40, Reply)

Hi Dok
How are you? :)
( Mellicious is made of candy, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:40, Reply)

Hmmm...
That's a fair point, yeah.
I'll have to be careful how I phrase things then.
Or just not poke random parts of animals.

Unless I'm using a broom.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:42, Reply)

Mel
I'm fine, had a crap weekend though, didn't get to do anything. It was boring.

How's you?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:44, Reply)

Afternoon everyone.
*waves*
( wanderlust, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:47, Reply)

That's pants :(
How come you didn't do anything?
*sympathy hugs*

I actually had an amazing weekend!
( Mellicious is made of candy, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:47, Reply)

It just didn't like men Dok
He hadn't been neutered. Was absolutely fine with my sisters and mum, would go for any men in the vicinity though!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:49, Reply)

Hi Lusty
Glad to here it Mel, I was stuck doing crap things fo the family.

Sam, no wonder he was angry at men, I bet the vet was a man! Just think how you'd feel if somebody came along and cut your nuts off.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:52, Reply)

Oh dear Dok...
I read that as "stuck doing crap things to the family"...
Then I remembered that you're not from Norfolk :p

I was talking about you at the weekend actually, in a conversation about accents :D
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:55, Reply)

He hadn't been neutered Dok, read it properly!
Meaning he was very territorial and aggressive towards men. If he had been neutered it wouldn't have been a problem...

Edit: afternoon Mel (and lusty!)

What accents were you talking about Kaol?
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:55, Reply)

Hey Hey lusty!
Jiggle away :-D



Ooh big bubblewrap, the most fun packed 3 seconds I've ever had*


*other than my last sexehtiem sesh
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 14:56, Reply)

Just accents in general!
Being in Wales made me go 50% more Essex...

I was chatting to some guy outside a pub, and he asked where I was from.
"I was born in 'arlow, mate".
Yes... To my eternal shame, I dropped the "H"...

Dok has an awesome accent! But the first time I met him I just thought he was really drunk... Turns out he's Scottish...
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:00, Reply)

I'm the opposite, I change my accent to be like who I'm talking to
I've gone quite a bit more Welshy since I moved back here (albeit to something most people wouldn't recognise as a Welsh accent, although it is one), but if I go dahn sarf I'll slip back into estuary English (lived in Surrey for years), and I even found myself going slightly Yorkshireish last time I was there, as I have a lot of Yorkshireish friends.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:02, Reply)

*coughs*
*is also Scottish*

Edit - I'm surprised at Dok's accent though, given that he's not lived in Scotland since Michael Jackson was black.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:02, Reply)

Kaol
It could be worse. You could be like my Dad and add extra Hs in all over the place where they're not welcome.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:03, Reply)

Good things I hope Kaol.
And not just I know a Scotsman, he has a crap accent.

Sam I seam to be suffering from the can't read won't read syndrome today.

Bubblewrap, I remember a night in a club where several female friends of mine where wrapped in the stuff, It was fun.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:04, Reply)

@Sam
What part of Wales are you in?
( Mellicious is made of candy, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:04, Reply)

Almost exactly in the middle!
You'll probably have driven through where I live...
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:05, Reply)

Kaol
I was probably drunk as well.

Yeah I've not lost my accent since Jackko was black, I'm proud of being a Scotsman!

EDIT Sam I read that as 'Drive through me'.

My gods my eyes have stopped working properly, if they ever did.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:06, Reply)

You are losing the plot Dok!
I think you need a cup of tea and a sit down.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:07, Reply)

Losing?
I think I lost the plot years ago!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:09, Reply)

I think Dok
needs a lay more than anything!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:09, Reply)

Red
Are you offering?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:17, Reply)

Grim

( thealternativefact, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:26, Reply)

Afternoon clendrix
What's grim? The mental image of Dok and Ethel?
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:27, Reply)

Hi Drixy
What's up?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:28, Reply)

Offering Dok?
Do I need to? ;-)
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:30, Reply)

Sam...
yes.

*waves*
*runs away*
( thealternativefact, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:33, Reply)

Don't go Drixy
You only just got here.

Red you're on then!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:35, Reply)

Oooh Ooh
*shys*

*runs aways*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:40, Reply)

Oh Noes
Red's run away.

*sads*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:45, Reply)

*runs back*
I was getting my bondage kit ;-)

*cracks whip*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:47, Reply)

Fucking hell
I seem to be vomiting on myself. It's not stopping.
Oh god it's coming out of my nose.

*cries*

Quick! Someone pass the mind bleach and some wire wool.

Only teasing, neither of you are that bad
( wanderlust, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:51, Reply)

Tie me up Red
I love it.

Lusty everybody else has run away.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:54, Reply)

Dok
I don't know if they've run away or simply cut their own eyeballs out before pouring acid in their sockets making sure they never have to read again.
( wanderlust, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:56, Reply)

Lusty
You'd join us given half the chance!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:57, Reply)

Oh Noes (again)
I've helped to turn OT into a blind persons hangout!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:00, Reply)

I'm here
Lusty care to turn this into some sort of sexy competition? Of course you do! *enjoys lusty*
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:03, Reply)

*enjoys Captain V*
*enjoys him hard*
( wanderlust, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:05, Reply)

*whips out the butterscotch flavoured lube
and the cock shaped ice cubes*
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:06, Reply)

*sluts it about*
*feels dirty*

*likes it*
( wanderlust, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:11, Reply)

Can I sniff your hairband?

( thealternativefact, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:13, Reply)

As it's you clendrix,
then yes.
( wanderlust, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:17, Reply)

*sits in corner*
*watches*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:18, Reply)

*re-enters*
*sniffs lusty's hairband*

Today's tenuous link to my job description (systems administrator): I just had to go and fix a boiler, and bleed about eight radiators, because 'it's a system, so it must be your job', I wasn't ignoring you all!
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:21, Reply)

Afternoon all
I took the afternoon off and had a nap. It was ace. How are we doing?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:21, Reply)

noon
Afternoon all. How are we today? Whats the forecast for the back end of this week? I want snow and lots of it. I'm home for a long overdue visit, but i couldn't get flights till thursday.
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:26, Reply)

Sam
Surely that's the job of whoever wants to keep warm? Bleeding the radiator is common sense and I'm sure most people could find enough guidance to fix minor boiler issues using information on the intertubes even if they don't really know much about boilers in the first place.

I suggest that next time, rather than caving in to your oppressors, you deal with them using thermite.
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:26, Reply)

I sort of got hijacked
I was in there to fix a problem that was legitimately mine to deal with and got harangued by loads of women flapping about their radiators being cold (oh shit the office temperature has sunk below 24 degrees, panic!)

Luckily I had the old Leatherman on standby, as ever, so was able to bleed the rads. The boiler just needed firing up again.

We do have a maintenance/builder/janitor man but he's off, so things like this become my responsibility as everyone else is a spastic.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:29, Reply)

Were the women hot?
And how did they repay you?

:edit: Still think you should've used thermite...
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:32, Reply)

They are hot now I've fixed the heating ;)
And they gave me tea and biscuits, and massaged my ego by saying I was very strong for turning bolts to drain the radiators that they couldn't manage. So not quite the blowjob I was after but not bad.

Edit: I'm not convinced of the viability of using thermite as a supplementary heating system when the main one is broken.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:34, Reply)

Seems reasonable
Certainly more than I get around these parts!
( Captain V, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:35, Reply)

Clearly
they know how men work.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:35, Reply)

Bleeding a radiator?
Hmmm... We've just got a plug-in heater.
That says "Glen" on it in, for some reason...
He's like the fourth member of our office.
Actually, third. He's more important than the trainee.
( Cawl, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:43, Reply)

I have banned any heating in my office
And constantly keep the window open. I hate stuffy rooms.

My ideal office temperature is a steady 16-17°C (yes, I have a thermometer on my desk), which, as well as being the perfect ambient temperature for me to sit in a t shirt and not be too hot or too cold, has the side benefit of everyone else thinking it's freezing, so they don't hang around when they come in here!

_{It also means I get a better view of the admin girls' nipples}
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:46, Reply)

I also like it on the cool side.
I will sit in the office with my sleeves rolled up while others are wearing their coats.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 17:00, Reply)