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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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It's very quiet on here again
my computer is processing loads of terrain data, so I can't do any actual work at the moment.

what are you up to?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:33, 204 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
I'm making fish
and wishing it was ice-cream
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:34, Reply)
making fish?
are you God?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:35, Reply)
Pedant
ok, ok, cooking fish :P
Make me chuckle though, well done sir
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:37, Reply)
;-)

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:43, Reply)

G C
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:59, Reply)
Took me a few seconds
but then I laughed heartily. Excellent punnage!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:04, Reply)
I'm spoiling for a fight.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:36, Reply)
I'm shivering.
I've nearly burnt all the sawn-up futon and double bed. I need to go to the hardware store and see if they have any sawdust logs in. We got some branches and a couple of free pallets the other day but they're still too damp to burn.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:38, Reply)
How very Dickensian
Being cold is shit though, far worse than being hot
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:40, Reply)
petrol is your friend

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:03, Reply)
I'm talking dirty to my dog.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:41, Reply)
Is it a pre-lude
to some "ruff" sex?

*sorry*
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:41, Reply)
I thnk I'm barking up the wrong tree...

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:44, Reply)
Is he getting off on it?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:42, Reply)
Nah
he prefers Cliff.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:43, Reply)
Thats my seducing music,
wired for sound. You had better watch it if you ever meet me and I start humming it.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:50, Reply)
I thought there was a court order against you preventing that?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:51, Reply)
He keeps getting his lipstick out,
if thats what you mean.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:45, Reply)
Haha!
You call it that as well?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:46, Reply)
:-) yeah!
I can do it to freak the kids out. Because he is a small dog, I lift him up and squeeze him a little. It pokes out ever so slightly, and the kids go 'eewww' and leg it!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:50, Reply)
Hours of fun!

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:51, Reply)
Would you like a photo
to show the kids?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)
We also have a small family dog with his very own lipstick : )

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:57, Reply)
Dog's knob
reminds me of those red german sausages. Now I feel slightly ill.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:50, Reply)
And pepperami
especially when you squeeze it up the packet and the little plastic liner bit comes out too.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:52, Reply)
It looks like its red raw. Like its been poking at an electric fire.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)
You pervert
doing that to your dog. You should be reported. People like you are almost as bad as Al.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:54, Reply)
He loves it.
Although, he does it himself sometimes when he is playing with his toy.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:56, Reply)
That's no way to talk about Mrs Al

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:57, Reply)
I've only seen my cat's peen once
It looked like a miniature Hula Hoop crisp, but made of flesh.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:58, Reply)
I used to have a cat who would insist on trying to hump me every night
when he'd finished he'd sit back and lick himself clean. If you tried to stop him mid hump he'd bite you.

My ex kept him - I think it's the only sex he gets these days.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:01, Reply)
Oh my god that made me laugh!
But I would shit myself if my cat tried to do that to me. He's vicious enough without getting rapey as well.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:03, Reply)
Cat rape
the best of all the rapes.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:15, Reply)
I have two
I'd better hope they don't gang up on me in a darkened alley or it'd be rape-a-rama for me.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:16, Reply)
Don't make me laugh! It hurts my chest!
And all I can think of now is an updated version of Runaround with Mike Reid but called Rape-a-rama with cats.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJ6-RhXTLXU
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:20, Reply)
RAPE-A-RAMAAAAA.....
NOW!!!!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:24, Reply)
That music is perfect
Perfect kitty rape-a-rama muzak
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:40, Reply)
Congrats! You've recieved my first Off Topic click!
I can't stop laughing at this.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:44, Reply)
Yay!

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:44, Reply)
I'm lying in state
almost dead.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:44, Reply)
In what kind of state?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:46, Reply)
A democratic free one
possibly.

Or maybe a dictatorship would be more appropriate.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:47, Reply)
How interesting.
Tell me more.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:48, Reply)
*lies on couch*
Well Dr.BGB, it was like this....


*wavy lines*


And then he told me never to tell anyone. Ever.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:50, Reply)
I see.
*strokes chin*

And do you ever dream of sleeping with your father?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)
No, your mum is better.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:56, Reply)
Haha!
She used to be a bit of a goer.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:58, Reply)
I can't decide if I want a pepsi or kool aid.
Listening to Carolina Liar.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:45, Reply)
Kool aid sounds like something you don't want to drink if you're above the age of 7

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:45, Reply)
*makes tasteless joke about 7 year olds*

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:46, Reply)
You disgust me

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:47, Reply)
Go on
report me.

I dare you.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:47, Reply)
*makes joke
about tasting 7 year olds*
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)
*points*
Look! Look!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)
Shh
People will notice and I already feel unclean about this joke
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:06, Reply)
I am 7.
I want to drink it.

I fucking made it. I mixed cherry and lemonade so when you drink it you make a face like this
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:52, Reply)
Sour cola bottles do that too

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)
What exactly is a "kool aid"?
What does it taste like? I'm curious, and fully agree with Al's assessment of the name.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)
it's a shitty powder drink that is marketed towards kids, you mix it with two quarts of water and some sweetener
they've got flavors like orange, cherry, grape etc
they also have an awesome line of invisible drinks which look like water but taste like jammin berry something or other which makes it totally cool cause it's invisible
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:00, Reply)
it's not invisible now is it

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:04, Reply)
I wish it was

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:07, Reply)
well...........it's CLEAR

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:07, Reply)
I'm reading this in an Irish accent
and appending 'Dougal' to the end.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:27, Reply)
Drink the Kool-aid
preferably cyanide or LSD flavour.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:06, Reply)
I was going to say
I only really know about it in the context of Ken Kesey.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:08, Reply)
same here
And the Jonestown suicides/massacre

Tried to find it in the UK a few years back, but it didn't seem to exist.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)
I'm trying desperately to work
But I just can't be arsed, at all.

Complete lethargy.

Bugger.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:47, Reply)
You're not trying hard enough
if there was a large Russian seven foot boxer standing over you threatening to smash your jaw if you didn't work you'd be hard at it.

See?

You're just lazy.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:49, Reply)
True
On all counts.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:04, Reply)
My work here is done

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:16, Reply)
Just had a meeting
Need to crack on
Can't be arsed.
There's nothing left on the internet to entertain me.
Apart from you lot.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:51, Reply)
Ok then, just for you.
I had my nipple rings taken out a while ago.

It's actually quite nice to feel soft nipples again instead of steel.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:54, Reply)
Go'ead lass!
I love my nipples.
Was it nice having your nipple rings pulled?
From an aesthetic point of view I wouldn't like to put metal and holes in my nipps, but sensation wise I'd like to know what it's like.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:56, Reply)
It was more erotic for me knowing I had nipple rings more than the sensation they gave when pulled.
It was nice though and seeing the rings between someone's teeth was quite hot.

I don't miss them though.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:01, Reply)
Hoorah, you're back on form!
I do like nipple clamps, and I like seeing the chain between someone's teeth - my own if needs be. I'm too cissy to get piercings though. I think.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:06, Reply)
Why do I feel like I should be charging for this?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:08, Reply)
You should kid
But all I have is £5.60 and some butterscotch sauce. I make good butterscotch sauce though.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:11, Reply)
I'm tempted.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:13, Reply)
and some panna cotta?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:28, Reply)
Ok I've been bought : )

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:30, Reply)
I can't be bothered to move
but I know I have to. My head hurts. I had a cocktail (gin) and a Fruli (yum yum). Then half a bottle of wine in just over 10 mins. By shotting it. Then 3 apple sours. Then I fell over a bit. Then I drank about 3/4 of a HUGE bottle of Lambrini. Then

~~~~wavy lines~~~~

MY HEAD HURTS
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)
Lambrini?
You're a walking student cliche. With pink stockings.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:02, Reply)
RED
Stalk me correctly, please.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)
Right


That there looks pink to me, what do other people think
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:23, Reply)
Red
It's just 'cos she's so pale.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:24, Reply)
You can fuck off shitty arse
Does anyone with proper colour vision want to give an opinion?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:25, Reply)
RED!
Definitely red and I'm an artist so I should know.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:26, Reply)
What is wrong with you people!

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:30, Reply)
Two secs
IT'S FUCKING RED OK

Ugly face
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:30, Reply)
That is not the same
The one on your thigh is clearly pink in that photo. What you're holding in your hand appears to be what you use to strain the pips out of your jam.

Edit - also GAH it's a bit big that picture, maybe a link would be better.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:35, Reply)
It's the same fucking pair of stockings!
yay arm
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)
hubba hubba

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)
Have you been using them to make jam?
Or Pease Pudding?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:44, Reply)
No
I only wore them once. I prefer my black and white striped ones.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:49, Reply)
I have some of those
Amanda Palmer style
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:07, Reply)
they will look lighter when streched.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)
Spread over a lady's thigh,
opaque red could appear pink...
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:38, Reply)
I'm just imagining you saying the words
"spread over a lady's thigh"

It's a good thought.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:43, Reply)
I'm very scouse
It doesn't lend itself to eroticism
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:08, Reply)
errrr
that's orange
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)
I blame the light in my room

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:38, Reply)
I blame your orange tights

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:43, Reply)
I BLAME YOU STALKING ME

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:46, Reply)
o_O

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:29, Reply)
I know it's a bit sexy,
but since it's your thigh I would have hoped you could control yourself.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:30, Reply)
You're a Lambrini girl?
Nooooooooo!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:03, Reply)
It was the first time I've ever had it
and I was too drunk to taste it.

ARGH WHY DID I DO THAT IT WAS SUCH A MISTAKE

We played a drinking game to "Get Over IT" (awesome film). Drink whenever they say Get, Over, or It. "it's" doesn't count.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:13, Reply)
it's about 3%

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:30, Reply)
Yes but it's that bad 3% that will get you at the end.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:31, Reply)
Yes but ...
it's fizzy and very sweet so it can make you feel really sickly, especially on top of her mix of drinks.
It's lethal stuff.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:31, Reply)
And I had a lot :(

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:34, Reply)
3% of a lot is not much
I'm really not having this, sorry. The other drinks got you pissed - that stuff probably helped with the hangover due to the high water and sugar content.

In other news, I have discovered that my local Turkish shop's 2 x bottles of Italian Merlot for £5 is actually drinkable.

This is the best and worst news I've had this week.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:44, Reply)
Most of the damage was probably the wine
Wine gets you drunk.

And I do have a killer hangover, which I don't usually get.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:47, Reply)
*says nothing*

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:49, Reply)
Wow.
I don't even need to comment this time!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:06, Reply)
Genius film!

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:35, Reply)
Oh God!
It's the Second Coming of BGB

Tee hee
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:03, Reply)
STOP BULLYING ME!
ONLINE!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:05, Reply)
Tee hee

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:20, Reply)
Oh oh, can you 'Do the Lambrini' ??

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:04, Reply)
How's the domestic situation?
Any warfare yet or is it still honeymoon period?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:09, Reply)
Have not moved in yet, will probably do so at the end of the month
I don't want to dip into my savings so I'm paying her as I get paid, before I move in. She doesn't care if I move in now but I'd like to be sure I'm squared away first.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:13, Reply)
I see.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:21, Reply)
Christ
If you're going to embrace alcoholism, you should really try to enjoy what you drink.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:20, Reply)
The cocktail was nice.
The Fruli was nice.
The wine wasn't so bad.
The apple sours weren't too bad.
I was too pissed to taste the Lambrini.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:21, Reply)
I have no fruit today

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:05, Reply)
I'm using MS paint,
My 16 years of education are really paying off.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:08, Reply)
oh chompy
are you making pictures to terrorize internet victims users?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:10, Reply)
Nope it's going to my companies board. I have to cut and paste some crap.
Sensible internet user kristine, what's your opinion on the recent drama?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)
I simply cannot be bothered with trying to read EVERYTHING about it, I am very busy and important.
So I'll just say I think you should terrorize more internet users.
Just not me, though.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:31, Reply)
I've stopped shitting
so that's something I can feel I've achieved.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:09, Reply)
I've recently been told I have IBS
I feel like I'm playing Shit Roulette these days.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)
Nasty
I appear to be just about over my stomach bug, I just need to catch up on 6 or 7 hours sleep I missed overnight.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:14, Reply)
Keep away from satsumas
I've heard they're not good for the squits.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:18, Reply)
Don't eat nothing but beetroot either

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:20, Reply)
Beetroot made my piss go pink
and on inspecting my used toilet paper, i thought a few piles had detached and i was pissing blood out my arse. Happy days!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:23, Reply)
I heard that rumour
I had weetabix this morning, seems to have fixed it.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:20, Reply)
Ew! nasty.
*hugs* Just to piss off the cunts.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:15, Reply)
Yummy
*cunts* to counteract the hugs
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:16, Reply)
You pair of cunty huggers
And huggy cunts
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:26, Reply)
IBS sounds crap
if you'll pardon the expression.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:16, Reply)
SBS would be a better term
Shitty Bottom Syndrome
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:17, Reply)
Incessant Bastard Shits

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:26, Reply)
It's not all bad
thelightinchains.blogspot.com/2009/11/west-of-tacos.html
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:48, Reply)
: D
Perfick
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:09, Reply)
I'm pushing around vast amounts of paperwork
whilst typing this and drinking a rather refreshing mango smoothie! :)
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:19, Reply)
does it have banana in it?
if so, it's shit
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:19, Reply)
Sliced banana on hot buttered toast
gives me the right fucking horn.

Seriously though, it is full of win!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:21, Reply)
bananas are fucking grim
they have no redeeming qualities. I sincerely hope that a disease wipes out all bananas.

People who make their living from banana growing or whatever can fuck off
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:22, Reply)
What have you been up to?
www.iita.org/cms/details/news_details.aspx?articleid=2735&zoneid=81
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:27, Reply)
*whistles nonchalantly*

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:34, Reply)
Banana butties
Nom
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:27, Reply)
Hmmm
I'm not sure about that I'm afraid, I'm much more of a chip buttie kinda gal... with tons of butter and ketchup! *drools*
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:31, Reply)
Just butter, salt and vinegar
Triple nom
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:34, Reply)
Double nom!
Bananas have to be just under ripe though and not to bananary.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:32, Reply)
my mother went fucking apeshit
when she found out our Canadian grandmother had been feeding us white bread, white sugar and banana sandwiches, with no crusts.

Take that, you 'individual home-made quiche in my lunchbox' social leprosy causing BITCH!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:35, Reply)
I get the feeling this is where all your pent up anger issues originally started from.
You just happen to take it out on Mr Bowie.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:47, Reply)
Now, come on.
Those individual home made quiche's sound rather lovely. Could you not have done a playground swap for something infinitely more thrilling though, like say, a choc dip, or a packet of ringo's?

If only she knew about the anthrax ;-)
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:53, Reply)
Ha!
I used to exchange them for Worcester Sauce Walkers French Fries, or would sling them onto the roof of the terrapin hut. I recently found out that my brother was doing exactly the same with his.

We were too posh for state school.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:57, Reply)
Not that I can see...
It quite lumpy though... not too sure about that :S
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:25, Reply)
I think they sneak bananas into all smoothies
I like bananas but not pulped
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:29, Reply)
they do
so I can't buy smoothies
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:32, Reply)
Awwww
But they don't taste bananananananaery
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:44, Reply)
they do to me
with my incredible sense of taste. for example, cucumber tastes really strongly disgusting to me.

most idiots say it tastes of nothing or water. they are idiots.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:46, Reply)
Oh they are idiots
it tastes of wrong, that's what it tastes like and don't let anyone tell you differently!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:50, Reply)
I'm bringing cucumbers with me to make your new house smell.


And because DiT likes me to tickle his bottom with one.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:51, Reply)
Nooooo
Not the cucumber! :(

I just won't let you in... you can stand outside in the rain
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:02, Reply)
Tru Dat.

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:07, Reply)
Man whore

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:08, Reply)
idiots like al
for example
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:51, Reply)
Indeed

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:02, Reply)
Most smug old croissant eating beardy stoner surf people
think cucumbers taste really strongly. They are just idiots and can bi ignored as statistical anomalies not applicable to the population in general.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:51, Reply)
Simply peel the cucumber
thus removing 90% of the taste
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:56, Reply)
10% of the taste would still be disgusting
I quite like pickled gherkins though
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:57, Reply)
No no no

Pickled onions yes, gerkins no
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:58, Reply)
they can really enhance a burger

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:00, Reply)
and salt beef sandwiches

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:01, Reply)
yes
I had a salt beef and horseradish bagel when in Bath with gherkins and stuff. it was fucking awesome.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:03, Reply)
Mmmmmm
I fucking love salt beef bagels.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:03, Reply)
Top o'Brick Lane innit.
I remember when they were £1.60. Best part of fucking £3 now...
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:06, Reply)
Yeah i've had them from there
pretty good. I used to get them in Finsbury Park all the time
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:12, Reply)
Been to the Needoo Grill yet?
Run by little Ali who used to manage Tayyab's. Just round the corner on New Road.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:13, Reply)
Nope, but i'll give it a try

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:21, Reply)
Great reviews
A good standby if Tayyab's is too mental - as is Mirch Massala on Commercial Rd
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:23, Reply)
Is now the time for me to mention celery?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:58, Reply)
I can take it or leave it
it is good as a stock vegetable though. for stews, pies and soups
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 15:59, Reply)
raw it is evil

Stringy and disgusting, in a salad it makes everyting taste of it like it's had some kind of celery bukkake party over all the nice lettucey bits.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:01, Reply)
I would rather
suck the shit from a camel's arse than eat celery.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:01, Reply)
What if the camal had had celery for breakfast?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:02, Reply)
Hopefully the other elements in the camel's stool
might distract me from the celery taste, so I'm still going with a)

Final answer: a) sucking the shit from a camel's arse.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:05, Reply)
Congratulations you just won a helathy dose of disantry
now would you like to answer the next question which is for and incredible dose diptheria.

Don't forget your just 5 questions away from Spina Bifida!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:08, Reply)
actually can I change my mind?
I've just thought - camel shit's probably 50% Arab spunk....


/racist
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:11, Reply)
why are camels called ships of the desert?

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:11, Reply)
*hands up*
Me! Me! I know!
Oh, actually you probably know an alternative punchline and you'll smugly tell me i'm wrong.
*shuts up*
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:13, Reply)
They float and are full of seamen

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:14, Reply)
I was going to say "because they're full of arab semen"

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:15, Reply)
they're called 'whores of the desert' where I come from

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:15, Reply)
Where are you from?

Preston?
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:16, Reply)
Abu Dhabi
or Winchester. I always get the two confused.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:19, Reply)
Never seen a camal in Winchester
Seen a few alpacas though.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:21, Reply)
racist

(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:23, Reply)
and Arab spunk
is approximately 100% Rapist Sauce
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:12, Reply)
It smells of evil
Blurgh!
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:03, Reply)
I am willing the day away as I feel like hammerd shit

and still have loads to do, rubbish.
(, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:00, Reply)

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